Wedge 1st Despair
The air conditioning in the waiting room was turned up too high, and Wuxi couldn’t help shivering.
She hadn’t slept well last night, or maybe it was just the cold, but her lips were turning blue. Her black and white eyes fixed on the crystal coffee table in front of her, and the girl on the table was also looking at her. Those bloodshot eyes reminded her of an elk on the edge of a cliff.
Because there was no escape, in desperation she was left with only despair.
Outside the floor-to-ceiling windows of the building, a cold rain suddenly began to fall, with large raindrops beating against the transparent windows. She turned her face, looking out blankly at the grey sky. This was the 28th floor, so high up that it seemed as if she could reach out and touch the grey clouds. The sky turned into a huge leaden slab, which instantly cracked into countless pieces and smashed down on her.
It was dark…
Wei Xi thought that she would probably always remember this day.
October 25, 2009. She had just turned 21. It was supposed to be a happy day.
Today was her birthday, and also the anniversary of her meeting Mo Ruifei. Seven years ago today, in the dilapidated orphanage on the outskirts of the city, 14-year-old Lu Weixi met 14-year-old Mo Ruifei.
The goddess of fate sat in the clouds, smiling mysteriously, as if she had deliberately arranged it.
Mo Ruifei didn’t know her own birthday, as she had been abandoned there by her parents when she was born. So she simply took Weixi’s birthday as her own.
This morning, as soon as the nearby pastry shop opened, Mo Ruifei, who never woke up early, ran to order a cake with panda eyes.
Weixi, as usual, took the earliest bus to go to class at the Academy of Fine Arts. When class was over, she received a notice from the department head that because of her excellent grades, the college had decided to apply for a special scholarship for her.
At that moment, she felt like a happy bird, almost soaring to the sky.
Yes. The sky today is so lovely, even the smell of the earth is so fresh. Everything is so rounded and perfect, just as she wished, that she almost wants to sing out loud.
If there had been no phone call, if she didn’t have to meet that man, and if she hadn’t agreed to that thing, this would have been a really rare happy day.
The phone in her backpack suddenly started ringing. The monotonous ringtone was harsh and irritating. Wei-xi felt her heart beating faster and faster along with the ringtone, and her body uncontrollably shaking.
But then the door opened and someone walked in. Wei-xi looked at the door in a daze, as if she were in a dream.
The phone kept ringing, which sounded extremely jarring in the quiet meeting room. The man seemed to ignore the ringing and walked straight up to her. She stood up a little uncomfortably.
‘Miss Lu, I’m Mr. Ruan’s assistant, Wang Dongyang. Mr. Ruan is in a meeting, which will end in about 30 minutes. He asked me to come and inform you of your schedule for tonight…‘ The man’s tone was completely formulaic, with a detached voice that hardly rose or fell.
’Schedule?’ Wei Xi repeated subconsciously. He’s not paying to be happy, it’s not a business battle, so why does he need to plan and lay out the situation so carefully?
‘Yes, Mr. Ruan is a perfectionist and plans everything,’ Wang Dongyang said quite seriously.
This is a bit of dark humour.
Wei Xi smiled. He is truly worthy of being the pride of the financial world and the most successful capitalist in the city. It makes sense to think about it. At the moment, she is also a commodity that he pays for, so naturally he wants to make careful calculations and get the most out of it.
Wang Dongyang’s schedule had not yet been announced, and after a short lull, his phone rang again. He looked up at her and asked, ‘Do you want to answer the phone first?’
Phone? Yes, you should answer the phone first.
However, when Wei Xi looked at the number on the screen, which was so familiar, she just couldn’t muster the courage to answer it. Her thin padded shirt was soaked with sweat, but she felt cold and weak.
“Ms. Lu, is everything okay?’
Wang Dongyang looked at her expressionlessly. He noticed that she kept staring at her phone and was reluctant to pick it up. He couldn’t help but remind her, ‘Miss Lu, you’d better answer the phone first. I think…’ He paused slightly and suddenly smiled, ‘You’d better finish everything before Mr. Ruan arrives. I need to remind you that Mr. Ruan never likes to waste time, especially on trivial matters.’
After giving his instructions, he left, leaving Wei Xi alone in the large reception room, feeling cold all over.
Trivial? Yes, to people like them, people who are above it all, she was trivial. Perhaps she should be grateful that he hadn’t said anything even more insulting to make her feel even more ashamed.
But what did it matter? This was the life she and Ruifei led: one third of the time, she endured insults; one third of the time, she waited to endure insults; and the remaining one third of the time, she healed the wounds inflicted by the insults.
After all, life continued after the humiliation.
The phone rang again. Knowing that she could not avoid it, Weixi finally picked up the phone.
The phone connected, and the sound of rain came from the other end of the line, mixed with the honking of horns and the background noise.
‘Weixi…where are you?‘
Weixi didn’t say anything. She really didn’t know what to say, and how to explain all this to the person on the other end of the line, so that the other person would accept it smoothly and not go crazy.
’Weixi, where are you?’ The other person repeated, sounding anxious.
Wei Xi took a deep breath and finally decided to lie, ‘That… Ruo Fei, I’m really sorry, but you’ll have to spend this year’s birthday alone. A classmate of mine is going abroad to study in a few days, and today we’re celebrating…’
‘Which one of your classmates can afford a Bugatti, is close enough to let you give up spending your birthday with me, and I don’t know?’ Ruo Fei’s tone was always a bit aggressive when he was angry.
Wei Xi was a little surprised, ‘How did you…’
‘How would I know? It was Ah Yuan from the shop downstairs who told me. You know, he’s obsessed with these expensive luxury cars. When I was walking to the corner this afternoon, he ran over to me and said that a Bugatti picked you up. He also emphasised that it was a special edition Hermes model, and only 14 of these models are produced worldwide each year, so you can’t even buy it if you have the money. Weixi, when did you make friends with someone like that who has so much money? I really want to meet him.’
‘Ruoxi, I…‘
’Weixi, you never lie to me. Now you’re not telling me the truth, I’m even more worried.”
Weixi fell silent, and all that could be heard was the sound of the rain. After a while, Ruoxi suddenly asked with clenched teeth, “It’s that bastard Ling Luochuan, isn’t it?”
Weixi didn’t say anything, and Ruoxi suddenly felt a chill run down his spine. ’It’s Ruan Shaonan?’
Wei-xi took a deep breath and simply replied, ‘Yes, it’s him. But don’t worry, he just invited me to dinner and tea. You know, he’s the most elegant celebrity gentleman in the city, he wouldn’t…’
‘Lu Wei-xi, you think I’m stupid!’ Ruo-fei yelled, ‘He’ll give you 120,000 for dinner and tea? Don’t tell me you picked up those 12 wads of bills at home! 120,000, ten times the price of the first night with “Peerless Beauty”, he’s really generous. Weixi, he’s humiliating you, do you know that?‘
’I know! I know better than anyone else.’ Weixi took a deep breath, biting her lips until they hurt. “But what can I do? This morning, didn’t you say that some lunatic splashed you in the face with water? After that, our boss Wei Chengbao called to tell me that if I didn’t come today, then the next time he splashed water in your face, it wouldn’t be water. He warned me not to make him angry, or he’d let you act out a real-life version of ”The Phantom Lover.’
Upon saying this, Wei Xi laughed self-deprecatingly, ‘You know, when this person gets angry, they are always very creative, and we have experienced this more than once.’
If it weren’t for the shaking fingers in the rain, even the voice would have trembled, ‘Wei Xi, let’s…let’s go, get out of here. There is always the outside world for us…’
Wei Xi shook her head helplessly, tears streaming down her face, ‘You know better than I do in your heart, we can’t go. We have worked at ‘Perfect’ for so long, and we knew that Wei Chengbao had connections. He was only afraid of two people: Ruan Shaonan and Ling Luochuan. Which one of them will help us? And…why do we have to run? We have my studies here, your dreams, everything we have worked hard for. Why do we have to run away because of a few people who have hurt us? Even if we are thieves and despicable, we still have the right to live, and no one has the right to take that away from us. If not, do you understand?’
Ruixi wanted to say something else, but Weixi didn’t have time to listen. She closed her eyes and murmured in a dreamlike voice, ‘Don’t be afraid. Close your eyes and pray sincerely, just like when we were little. Believe me, the night will always pass, and tomorrow… will be a new day.’
She stumbled, and Ruixi fell to her knees in the rain-soaked street. The cake in her hands was soaked in the storm, and the beautiful box had almost turned into pulp.
She bent down, too overcome with grief to make a sound.
‘Weixi, do you understand? That person, he won’t let you go just like that…’
These were the last words that Mo Ruofei said to Lu Weixi before she turned off her phone on that pouring rain-filled evening, as Mo Ruofei sat huddled in the rain.
The rain was so loud that she didn’t know if Weixi had heard her. But it didn’t matter anymore.
They both knew what would happen in the future, but they had no choice.
A life without choices is sad, but they couldn’t escape it.
They didn’t die on a night of chaos, in an alley without sunlight, or in a cold orphanage.
They had to live. But this life of suffering was unbearable.
The sound of rain outside the window had died down slightly, but the wall clock continued to tick away. In the fear of the unknown, waiting became an endless torment.
When the heavy door was pushed open again, it was just as the rain stopped and the sky cleared. The gloom receded, the clouds dispersed, and the golden sunlight, like a piercing call, stabbed her eyes.
In the shock of the pain, she could only turn around, and saw Lu Shaonan, the man she had been waiting for so long, the man who held all the power in his hands, standing silently behind her like a god, as if it was an inescapable fate.
She was not unafraid.
Wei Xi involuntarily backed up, and then backed up some more…until her back was pressed against the cold floor-to-ceiling windows, and she stood still with her eyes wide open. Behind her was a bottomless abyss, and there was nowhere for her to hide.
It seemed as if he could sense her fear, so he smiled even more happily, like a predator looking down on his prey, with a charming smile, and walked towards her with ease – to end her life.
Chapter 1: Disaster strikes
The car is driving along the road.
Wei Xi looks out of the window at the streets outside, where the colourful neon lights flash past in a flurry. Ruan Shaonan is fiddling with his laptop, his expression cold and indifferent, like any other successful person, busy and unfeeling.
Wei Xi watches his fingers fly over the keyboard, the joints prominent but long and strong. Undeniably, these are hands that are adept at turning the tides of life, for example, the vicissitudes of the business world and the stock market. Or the family fortunes of thousands of households, and the fate of an ordinary girl’s life.
The car had driven into the depths of the city’s bustling heart without her noticing. Luxuriously decorated boutiques stood like humble maids of honour on either side of the street.
The man put away his computer, turned his face to look at the girl beside him, his eyes focused. However, Wei Xi just looked out the window, with no desire to communicate. A deal is a deal, and words seem superfluous.
She knows nothing about his life, and neither does he. But tonight, she is going to entrust him with the most precious memory of a woman. This is fate.
However, at this moment, he reached out his hand, and the cold fingers touched her face, as if they were some kind of reptile. She didn’t dare move, but she trembled all over, and the pitiful heart in her chest squeezed tightly together.
The man looked at her coolly and laughed softly, ‘Don’t be afraid like that, I’m not a tiger, I can’t eat you.’
Weixi turned her face and looked at him in a daze. However, he no longer looked at her and went back to his own business, as if nothing had happened.
Weixi pressed her head against the cold car window. In addition to her fear, an inexplicable sadness welled up. She really wanted to recall the cause of this unwarranted disaster in detail, but what remained in her memory were only fragmentary memories.
She should remember, she thought with a sense of loss, but it was only a week ago. Forgetting is just helpless self-deception.
Perhaps every woman, even a prostitute who sells her smile for a living, does not want to recall such a process—a process of watching one’s dignity being trampled on.
Now that I think about it, it was really a very ordinary day…If I really have to say what was different, it was that Weixi noticed that the day seemed to get dark particularly quickly.
The night was like a prison, with lonely spirits and ghosts standing in the wilderness. Before the fireworks had finished and the music had stopped, in this bustling coastal city at the pinnacle of the secular world, some humans had just gone to sleep, while some creatures had just woken up…
‘Weixi, VIP Room 6.’ The quick-moving bartender, Feng, placed a bottle of Hennessy on the bar and said, “Be careful, this is expensive.”
Weixi placed the bottle on a silver tray and held it carefully in her hands.
She carried the bottle through the Disco bar, dazzled by the lights, deafened by the music, and surrounded by men and women of all colours. It was as dazzling and confusing as ever.
‘Hey, Weixi,’ someone called out to her.
Weixi turned around and saw the beautiful DJ Coco, dressed in a black leather catsuit and wearing oversized headphones, standing on the DJ booth playing music, and she didn’t forget to wave at her in her spare time.
This girl, with one hand stylishly grinding the plates and the other hand forming a semicircle to gesture a drinking action, was amazing because she didn’t delay in either.
Weixi understood that this was an invitation for her and Ruifei to go for a drink after work.
She shook her head and placed her hand on the side of her face.
CoCo couldn’t stand it anymore and waved her hand, meaning: ‘Cut it out, go home to sleep after work, are you bored?’
Wei Xi smiled and shrugged her shoulders. There was no way around it, she and Ru Fei were both night owls with an unbelievable tolerance for alcohol. They could drink so much that they could sleep until 3pm the next day and no one would care. She had to go to class the next day, with puffy eyes like a pair of goldfish and a hangover that made her head feel like it was going to explode, so how was that going to work?
Then, when Wei Xi went to deliver the wine, Coco concentrated on playing the disc. She had won the DJ competition in the city, and her dexterous hands were magical. The music she played was even more touching, immediately bringing the atmosphere to a fever pitch.
As a result, the pole-dancing girls swayed with a natural grace, the girls in animal skins were hot and passionate, and the tie-wearing men flirted and made love with the women in halter necks, burning with passion. On the dance floor, countless men and women embraced each other, pining and complaining.
And those tall, beautiful, gentle and charming temperament beauties, at the bar, in the booth, with curved eyebrows and eyes, leaned over the ears of the men dressed in brocade and walked in the night, and whispered softly, ‘500 for chatting, 3,000 for going out, 5,000 for a whole night. Cash only, no cheque, thank you…’
Lu Weixi, holding a silver tray, carefully made her way through the group of demons and devils, and realised that every day was like Halloween here. The gates of hell were wide open, and demons and devils were pouring out to wreak havoc on the world and bring misery to the living.
When she had finished serving drinks and was walking out with the tray, she saw that the door to booth no. 7 was ajar. A familiar voice drifted through the crack, a slightly hoarse voice that was more or less careless.
Red eyes looked at this lonely city
as if a bitter smile forced out happiness
The whole city spent all its money for me
A flashy era as the setting for our break-up
Legend has it that the tears of a devoted heart will move the city
When the neon lights go out, the world gradually cools
Fireworks will fade, and the music will stop
Making the ending of this story even more beautiful
Very sad lyrics, exuding a sense of helplessness and sadness. I just don’t know how many people can understand this in the midst of the surging crowds in the city.
Wei Xi smiled, thinking that the only person who could sing this kind of song in such a place would probably be Ru Fei.
This is a place of lust and debauchery, where men want to be captivated and seduced, and women naturally want to be carefree and flirtatious.
Playing sad? Who cares! Ruo Fei, who has been rolling in the wind and the moon for many years, would understand this, but she likes to do the opposite.
At the end of the corridor is the performance hall, where the explosive English dance music echoes along the long corridor, with the singing of Groove Coverage reverberating with a buzz, full of innocent questions and mysterious temptations.
God is a girl
Wherever you are
Do you believe it
Can you receive it
Is God a girl? God is not a girl.
If God were a girl, she would not stand by and watch so many poor women suffer on earth.
The guest in Box 13 left with a young woman with a willowy waist, contented and satisfied. Wei Xi came in to clean up the mess. She put the empty bottles, cigarette boxes, pink condoms, white medicine bags and other rubbish into a black plastic bag, ready to take it to the back alley to throw it away.
Suddenly there was a commotion outside the door.
The noise was loud, footsteps were chaotic, there were curses, shouts, and someone screaming in fear. Judging from the sounds, it seemed that another hostess had been beaten up.
This was an absolute male-dominated world, and some things were so common that they no longer surprised her.
Initially, Wei Xi just went about her business, not paying any attention. But she never expected that a disaster would come so swiftly.
Chapter 2 Mr Ling, do you think we should clear the room?
‘Perfect Beauty’, a nightclub famous throughout Southeast Asia, is renowned overseas for its luxurious decor and high-calibre, well-educated and well-mannered ‘army of beautiful women’.
The place is highly secretive, and like many other high-end entertainment clubs, it follows an unwavering principle: the more debauched the place of lust and romance, the calmer the appearance must be, and the outside world must never be allowed to see anything.
In this regard, the Boss Wei Chengbao’s iron-fisted management of ‘Perfect City’ is undoubtedly the leader in the industry.
And there is never a shortage of stories in places like this, but the stories here have always been kept secret and under wraps. The most unknown things happen behind the curtain, the most dirty and despicable things are hidden under the floorboards, and the most shameless, despicable and cruel acts are transformed into grievances and dissipate into the rotten air, silent and without a sound.
That night, Mo Ru and Fei Lu Weixi, under these rules, almost like two tiny beetles, disappeared into the bloody night.
It was just a little bit different…
When Weixi barged into the door of Room 7, which was ajar, Ruofei’s mouth was bleeding. The drops of blood fell onto the scarlet carpet, and before they had a chance to dry, the man’s palm came at lightning speed, and another merciless slap came. There was a crisp sound, and there was nowhere to hide.
Seeing that the man’s fan-like palm was about to come down again, Weixi, without thinking, got in front of Ruofei, like a sparrow protecting its young. Unfortunately, she was not facing a child with a slingshot, but a pack of wolves.
The bodyguard-like man was first taken aback, then turned his head to look at his boss, who was sitting on the sofa, as if asking for instructions with his eyes.
Wei Xi could not see what was going on across the bodyguard’s tall body, but she could hear a voice, with the usual lazy tone of a rich young man, say leisurely, ‘I must say, Wei, your ladies here are really something! One dares to pour wine on the guests I invited, and the other doesn’t even know the basic rules. How dare they barge into the VIP room? Could it be that you usually treat them too gently, so they’ve become so lawless?”
A voice echoed in a tone that bordered on flattery, “It’s my failure to discipline them that spoiled Mr Ling’s mood.”
However, the man yawned, his tone light as if he were watching a play, ’Haha, it’s fine, this is interesting, you don’t feel bad about it.’
As soon as these words were spoken, the burly bodyguard immediately made a move.
When the iron-hard slap hit his face, Wei Xi felt as if his left cheek had been scraped with a razor blade. His face felt burning hot, as if it was going to bleed. His eyes also burned painfully, and he almost shed tears.
God tells us, if someone slaps you on the left cheek, offer him your right cheek as well. But God must not have known what it was like to be slapped.
This was not the first time that Wei Xi had been slapped, but it was definitely the first time that she had been slapped by such a strong man. When the second slap landed on her right cheek, she almost wondered if she would go deaf. Her ears kept buzzing, as if countless bees had flown inside. Her mouth was shaking, her teeth grazed her mouth, and her mouth tasted fishy and sweet.
Life has taught us a lesson: when you are faced with something you cannot fight against, you only have two choices: to endure it or go with the flow.
Obviously, if I hadn’t chosen neither that day, but instead, when I couldn’t stand it anymore, I splashed the boss with wine. It’s fine to offend him, but it just so happened that the person treating today was Ling Luochuan, which was like poking a hornet’s nest.
The ladies who work here all know that it is better to offend their boss Wei Chengbao than Ling Luochuan. This man has money, face, background, means, and all the disgusting things that a playboy should have. He is handsome and has no scruples.
If they had not been driven to a dead end, they would not have been so impulsive. In fact, she was not wrong. She just did not want to go on stage. She had her principles.
This was the bottom line she set for herself two years ago when she walked into ‘Perfect Beauty’. At the time, she told Weixi, ‘If one day I can’t even keep this, you can consider me dead.’
However, these successful people who can call the shots don’t care if she lives or dies.
When the bodyguard’s slap fell like a weapon, she stood up like an enraged black cat, her hair standing on end. ‘What are you doing here! What are you meddling in! Is there not enough chaos? Get out!’
She didn’t know where she got the strength, but she broke free from the man holding her and pushed Weixi out the door. Weixi had always been thin, and she stumbled, almost falling out.
However, it was just a step away. Fortunately, someone was quick-witted and intercepted this almost-escaped fish.
‘Hey, Wei, where did you find all these beautiful women? They’re all so pretty,’ Ling Luochuan said, putting his arm around Wei Xi’s waist and pinching her chin with his other hand. He narrowed his eyes slightly and took a closer look at the girl in his hands with the help of the dim wall light.
Wei Xi remembered that those eyes were very beautiful, with long eyelashes, and they looked even more beautiful when they were cast downwards. However, there was no emotion in his eyes, like a raptor hunting its prey, with a single claw to seal the throat!
Wei Chengbao stroked his semi-bald head and said with some difficulty, ‘She’s just a waitress, responsible for serving drinks and cigarettes to guests, cleaning the tables, and she doesn’t work here.’
Ling Luochuan just laughed, ‘Waitress? That’s a pity.’ He rubbed his thumb on Wei Xixi’s pointed chin, but his dark, ice-like eyes were fixed on Wei Chengbao. “As long as you’re someone here, you’ll be fine. It doesn’t matter if you’re not. With your two-acre plot of land, you’re still worried that I can’t handle it?”
The men in the room laughed, their voices ambiguous and spirited.
The large private room was filled with five or six people, all of them dashing figures in immaculate attire. This is a place of debauchery and lust, but there is no wretchedness in their expressions. Only their sharp eyes can strip her bare.
What happened after that? Wei Xi didn’t want to dwell on it. But human memory is strange. Happiness can fade away like the wind, but unhappiness always follows.
The man held her wrist and forced her onto the sofa. They clearly knew each other in the private room, but his hand felt like an icy coin, piercing straight to her heart.
A pungent smell of alcohol hit her in the face, and she knew it was not a good sign.
She was about to struggle when she heard Ruifei whisper, ‘Ling Shao, I’m sorry, okay? You want me to go on stage, I’ll go. Please let my sister go, she’s still a student…’
Ruifei wiped the blood from the corner of her mouth, carefully put on a smile, and spoke softly and carefully to gauge the situation. She was scared, she was really scared this time.
However, the man seemed to be ignoring her, focusing all his attention on Weixi. He squeezed her chin, looking left and right, and under the dim light, rubbed her porcelain-like skin, making a sound with his mouth as if he were examining a fine piece of merchandise.
Wei Chengbao was discerning and immediately asked with a smile, ‘Ling Shao, do you think we need to clear the area?’
Upon hearing this, if she had not almost fallen to the ground, she would have been weeping and pleading, ‘Mr Ling, she really is a student. Please have mercy and let her go. Please let her go. I’ll do whatever you want…’
There was a burst of laughter in the room, and someone said with a hand covering their mouth, ‘She really does think she’s a treasure… Girl, wake up. Whoever Mr Ling looks at is someone’s blessing. It’s useless to keep begging.’
Ling Luochuan’s smile grew even wider. He wiped the blood from Weixi’s mouth and asked slowly, ‘Your best friend really went all out to save you. What do you say?’
Weixi had bitten her lips so hard that she was bleeding. She looked at Ruifei, whose cheeks were red and swollen, took a deep breath, and whispered, ‘Mr. Ling, please let her go. I’ll stay with you.’
Ling Luochuan nodded with a smile, and the bodyguard immediately let go of Ru Fei’s arm. Ru Fei wanted to say something else, but Weixi hurriedly gave him a wink, and Ru Fei immediately understood.
However, as soon as her hand touched the cold doorknob, she heard Ling Luochuan ask nonchalantly, ‘Wei, will the police come here to investigate? What if someone calls the police and says that we are oppressing an innocent woman, what should we do?’
Wei Chengbao immediately understood a little, and immediately replied, ‘Don’t worry, Mr. Ling, the connections have already been made. Besides, even if it were the emperor himself, he wouldn’t dare to investigate Mr. Ling’s box. You just rest assured.’
Ling Luochuan smiled, looked at Ru Fei’s pale face with mocking eyes, raised his chin and said, ‘Keep walking…’
Ru Fei felt that the door handle was a thousand pounds heavy. Weixi kept giving her signals, so anxious that tears were about to fall.
Just then, Ling Luochuan snorted, ‘What? Don’t want to go? Then don’t go!’
‘Mr. Ling, you promised…’ Weixi was about to say something when Ling Luochuan grabbed her by the neck and pressed her against the sofa.
He leaned in and whispered in her ear, ‘Playing for time with me? You’re not good enough…’
‘Miss Lu, please try on these shoes. They go well with your rose-coloured halter dress.”
The professional and sweet voice of the saleswoman successfully pulled Wei Xi back from the depths of her memories to the cruel reality.
She steadied herself and looked at herself in the mirror. The girl in the mirror also looked at her. Her dazed eyes were overwhelmed by the gorgeous background. She could only see a beautiful skin, but not herself.
Ruan Shaonan casually stubbed out his cigarette, stood up, and gestured to the shop assistant to bring a string of pearl necklaces. The pearls were lustrous and white, holy and beautiful, complementing the luxury of the dress.
He put it around her neck himself, concealing the slenderness and emptiness there. Looking at her, he was like the supreme god looking down on the world—his own perfect work of art—and then nodded with satisfaction, ‘Very beautiful.’
It was indeed beautiful; how could it not be, with an outfit that cost over six figures?
He was not a sentimental man, but he could spend money like water. He dressed her up on a whim, as if he were giving a beggar a coin.
At that moment, he stood behind her, his hand resting on the artery at her neck, as if he were testing the temperature of the blood there. His hand was cold, and there was no intimacy in his expression, which made Lu Weixi involuntarily think of the fingers of another man, which were generally cold and slender and powerful, like Lu Shaonan’s.
Ling Luochuan, ‘rain falls in the river’, quite a beautiful name, which easily makes people think of a gentle gentleman who is warm and gentle as jade. However, Weixi believes that this person is simply the biggest irony of ‘a person is just as his name’. Of course, except for his good looks.
Weixi doesn’t know if that was the darkest moment of their lives.
That night, Ling Luochuan’s fingers squeezed her neck mercilessly. The force was not heavy, just enough to make it difficult for her to breathe, but not fatal.
She was already too weak to resist anything, feeling like she was being held under water. The air was filled with the smell of smoke, alcohol, and the man’s cologne, rushing at her like a mountain, almost suffocating her.
If she hadn’t been shaking and pleading with him, ‘Mr. Ling, we know we were wrong, really wrong. I’ll go with you, please…”
Ling Luochuan, however, looked at her with a half smile, and just looked her over from head to toe. “You? Sorry, I’m not interested. They’re more interested. As for her, don’t worry, I’m not the kind of tightwad who won’t pay a reasonable price.”
Ru Fei was completely desperate, and cursed with clenched teeth, ’Ling, you son of a bitch! You’ll die a miserable death!’
The result of speaking rudely was a fierce slap in the face, and the bodyguard grabbed Ru Fei by the hair and pressed her face down on the table.
No one screamed, and Wei Xi could only watch her, unable to make a sound or move. She was pressed against the sofa by the tall and strong bodyguard, and more than one pair of hands held her hands. The man’s powerful palm was pressed against her face, preventing her from even whimpering.
Ling Luochuan watched her with interest, as if he were admiring a small animal struggling to death.
Then, in broad daylight and in full view of everyone, he sighed, and his long, slender fingers traced the beautiful curve of her neck to the collar of her uniform shirt. Very patiently, he undid her buttons one by one, little by little trampling on the dignity of this poor girl.
Until most of the buttons on her chest were undone, and the black bra made her skin look even whiter, the perfectly round, sheep-fat-like breasts rising and falling with Weixi’s rapid breathing like waves in the sea.
Ling Luochuan let out a light sigh, turned his face to the people in the room and said, ‘You go to the next box first, and after I’m done, we’ll go to another restaurant to continue the party.’
‘Ling Luochuan, you’re not a human being!’ Ru Fei cursed, her voice breaking.
Wei Xi turned her head and saw them dragging Ru Fei like a dog. Ru Fei’s hands were clutching the door frame of the box, his bloodshot eyes desperate, and he refused to let go, even if he died.
Wei Xi wanted to say something, but she couldn’t. The man pulled her bra up, his cold breath and hot lips falling on her pale lips, the exquisite line of her neck, and her pink, provocative nipples. His agile fingers went around behind her, unconcernedly undoing the buttons of her corset, pulling her obtrusive things to the side, like a playful child, ruthlessly ravaging her fair body.
Her half-naked body was exposed to the dim light and the indifferent gazes of the men, trembling with despair. She knew what she was going to lose, and that she would lose it in the most shameful and terrifying way.
She turned her face to the side and saw the wine bottles and glasses on the table, as well as ice picks in the ice bucket…If she could just get them, she could end it herself, even if she couldn’t stop him.
But she couldn’t move. Her hands were pinned by him, and her whole body was held in his arms. His fingers were in her hair, kissing her tear-stained face, enthusiastically continuing this cruel game.
The tip of her nose could smell the musky scent of a man and the heavy breath of desire. She felt cold all over, as if she were sinking in the water. Her breathing became more and more difficult, and her consciousness became more and more unclear.
He lifted her face, his fingers skillfully kneading her pretty plumpness, biting her lips and swallowing her subtle cries of pain. His long fingers traced the line of her waist and explored her all the way down. His breath was hot, and he seemed to whisper something in her ear. The music in the box was deafening, and she didn’t hear a word he said. She only saw his face vaguely, coming and going.
She didn’t know how many people were watching this horrible and despicable scene, but no one came forward to stop it. No one even wanted to say a word for them, even just a word.
There were no tears in her dry eyes, only pain and despair.
She heard someone laughing, cold and aloof, with eyes like a hawk flashing in the endless darkness. She really didn’t understand why this person, despite his good looks, could laugh like the devil.
Has anyone ever seen a wolf smile while devouring its prey? She saw one today, and it could drive a person to their death.
Her consciousness grew more and more blurred. Everything around her drifted further and further away. All sounds seemed to come from afar, or to just float in her ears. The whole person felt like sinking to the bottom of the water, or like someone had cut her throat.
She wanted to scream for help, but she couldn’t make a sound. She wanted to reach out and grab something, but it was all in vain. All she could do was breathe rapidly, in sharp gasps, as if she were using all her strength. Her sweat soaked the man’s fingers and the half-unbuttoned shirt, and her whole body felt like it had been run over by a truck, her liver and gallbladder torn apart, her insides in pain. But she still couldn’t breathe, no matter how hard she tried!
In a daze, she heard someone shouting in panic, ‘She has congenital asthma, this will be a problem, let her go!’
Then, someone casually replied, ‘It’s just asthma, it won’t kill her.’
Indeed, it won’t kill her, no matter how painful it is. Only someone who has truly experienced it will know that even though you are alive, you cannot breathe as if someone is choking your throat… It is a living hell!
Chapter 3: Public humiliation
‘Are you afraid of me?’ The man across from her put down his knife and fork, wiped his lips with a napkin, and said this to Weixi.
Weixi looked up at him a little hastily, but didn’t know how to answer. In fact, she was really afraid of him.
Ruan Shaonan gave a soft smile and casually folded his hands together. ‘I probably know the reason. Frankly, I don’t know what method Wei Chengbao used, but I’m satisfied with the result. I like certain qualities in you, but I’m not willing to waste too much time on this. So, if I’ve made you feel aggrieved, I’m sorry.’
Wei Xi didn’t say anything, and he didn’t need her to say anything. This wasn’t an equal listening session, but a monologue by the powerful. Compared to his whims, her will was insignificant.
He took out a cigarette and asked her very politely, ‘Is that okay?’
Wei Xi nodded absentmindedly, then saw him take out a lighter and expertly light the cigarette. The Givenchy lighter made a metallic cracking sound, and the orange flame bloomed like a flower. The sound and smell were so familiar, as if they were from that night that turned the world upside down…
That night, he sat in the corner of the room and lit a cigarette. The orange flame looked like a small bright torch. The flickering light illuminated a dark corner and cast a shadow over a pair of deep, ocean-like eyes.
He had been sitting in the dark and had not spoken before, and since she had been too flustered, she had not noticed him. At the moment, she was too confused to see his face clearly, but she could still hear his voice.
“Luo Chuan, that’s enough. You’re a grown man, why are you fighting with two little girls? You really think of yourself as a gangster?”
His voice was low and clear, as if he was used to giving orders from above the crowd, and there was a hint of mockery in his tone. However, Ling Luochuan, who had always been domineering, didn’t care at all. He raised his face from before Weiwei’s chest and smiled at him spitefully, ’I’m in the middle of something, and you just had to come and ruin my fun?’
‘I was worried that you might get carried away.‘ He stubbed out his cigarette, stood up, and with one hand in his trouser pocket, slowly walked out of the shadows in the corner. He stopped next to the sofa where she was lying, looking down condescendingly at the dishevelled and pitiful person below.
’You won’t die from asthma in a moment, but if the brain is deprived of oxygen for too long, it will turn the person into an idiot. You don’t want to support her for the rest of your life, do you?’
‘Haha…’ Ling Luochuan patted her pale face, “It’s not bad to keep such a pretty little idiot for life, wouldn’t that just give me a free hand?”
He laughed, counting down, ’You never say anything serious, a good party, it was agreed to welcome Zhao back, but we ended up just watching you toss and turn for most of the night. Is it ever going to end?’
Immediately, someone stood up to smooth things over, ‘Haha, it’s fine, it’s fine. The dust-washing is a small matter, and Ling Shao’s happiness is a big matter. As long as he’s happy, that’s good, that’s good…’
‘When he’s happy enough, these two will be dead from his torment,’ Ruan Shaonan looked at his watch in the light, ‘Let’s go, this is about enough, let’s go to another place to continue the party.’
After saying that, he didn’t even look at them, and walked away on his own.
Ling Luochuan watched him go, and surprisingly, he really stopped. He smiled, pinched Wei Xi’s chin, kissed her cheek, picked up his jacket, and followed.
So, a group of people followed in a mighty procession. They discussed as they walked, which house had mellow red wine, elegant style, and a gentle, beautiful waitress who was also understanding.
Leaving behind a room of desolation and two pitiful girls, who would clean up the mess?
‘Weixi, Weixi… Look at me, look at me quickly. Don’t scare me, where are your pills? Where are your pills?‘ Ru Fei was busy helping her pull her clothes back on and fasten her buttons, and rummaging through her pants’ pocket for her pills.
She wanted to tell Ru Fei that the pills were in the dressing room, but she was too weak to speak. She felt a pair of slender arms pull her hard, trying to lift her onto her back. However, Ruifei, who was covered in bruises, could no longer bear her weight, even though she was as slender as a dragonfly.
Wei Chengbao looked at their miserable state and, without offering to help, casually chided them, ‘You two really have done it this time. Do you know who those people were? I had to serve them like my ancestors. And you even offended him? Don’t you want to hang around here anymore?’
A crowd had gathered outside the door. Wei Chengbao, before leaving, leisurely instructed them, ‘I’m telling you, everyone, stand there and watch. No one is to touch them, or else… I’ll break that person’s legs!’
The crowd looked at each other in shock. ‘Perfect Beauty’ was like a small society, even more like a safari park, with its own strict hierarchy and ecological food chain. When the top predator spoke, who would dare not obey?
So everyone stood politely one metre away from them, their survival instinct telling them not to get too close.
At that moment, Wei Xi wondered dazedly what they had done wrong. The whole night had been nothing but a game of cat and mouse. They had been made to suffer, while everyone else had watched with glee.
What happened afterwards? She didn’t know anything about it. When she woke up again, she was already in the hospital. She was clear-headed and her thinking was normal, except that her body was a little weak.
If she hadn’t bought the chicken soup, the one from the snack bar near the hospital, which tasted mediocre and had a thick layer of oil floating on top, would have been shocking to look at.
Un Xi was used to eating like this and picked up the spoon to drink it bit by bit. Ru Fei was tidying up while telling her that it turned out that the person who had come to their rescue last night was Ruan Shaonan.
She was stunned and asked with big, dark eyes, ‘Which Ruan Shaonan?’
‘Ruan Shaonan from Yitian Group, a new rich man whose actions can shake the stock market.’ Ru Fei looked at her strangely. Ruan Shaonan’s name was well-known in the city, and the entrepreneurial myth of Yitian Group was known to everyone.
‘You were unconscious at the time, and that bastard Wei Chengbao wouldn’t let anyone help. CoCo and Feng tried to come and help me, but they were stopped by those bastards who were just watching. You didn’t see it, but CoCo was so desperate that she was crying, and kept asking if you were dead. Fortunately, Ruan Shaonan sent his driver to help me take you to the hospital, otherwise, in that situation, I really don’t know what I would have done.”
Wei Xi put down the chicken soup in her hands. Her cheeks were burning, but her heart felt cold.
Her phone rang. Wei Xi looked down and saw it was her own phone, but the number was unfamiliar. She had a bad feeling about it, but she picked up the phone anyway. Then a clear voice came through, deep and powerful.
‘Miss Lu? This is Ruan Shaonan…’
Wei Xi felt her heart plummet like a frightened bird into an endless abyss of despair. Darkness instantly engulfed everything around her, leaving only his voice, echoing hollowly.
His voice was cold, but gentle, and after briefly asking about her condition, he hung up. In the space of just 30 to 40 seconds, Wei Xi’s mind had gone into stasis, as if her thoughts had been dragged into another dimension by a brutal hand.
‘Wei Xi, whose phone was that?’ Ru asked.
Wei Xi turned her face and said in a daze, ‘It was… Ruan Shaonan.’
This phone call had worried Weixi for days, but her worry was tinged with a sense of luck.
In this city, he was so rich, admired by everyone, and every move he made was the focus of the media and the topic of conversation among the people. She, on the other hand, was just an ant living in a corner, struggling in the vast crowd, running around for a living.
So, this is it.
This is the distance between the mortal world and the world of the gods, the distance between a woman and a man, the distance between her and him… Perhaps they can just forget each other and never think of the mundane world again?
However, a phone call from Wei Chengbao shattered all her naive illusions.
The meaning was simple and straightforward, as brutal and blunt as a tacky soap opera, without even the subtlety of a euphemism. After that, Lu Weixi felt as if she had lost her soul.
It wasn’t until she saw him, saw his cold brow reflected in the setting sun, that she realised her soul hadn’t left her, that she was still alive. So she had to live with it all.
By the time they left the restaurant, the night was deep.
Wei Xi was suddenly a little tired as she sat in the car. Her nerves had been stretched for so long and so tightly that at this most critical moment, she had no strength left. Perhaps, as some people say, fear is just the process of waiting in fear; pain is just the result of suffering.
That’s all…
She had no strength to think about anything else, so she just leaned back in the leather chair and fell asleep. It seemed like she had had a very long dream, but she had forgotten the content. She only knew that it was an incredibly sad dream.
How long had she been having this dream?
If dozens of seconds made up a moment, and dozens of moments made up a snap of the fingers, how much blood had she shed in the blink of an eye?
Had she shed any tears?
She doesn’t remember. In a daze, it seems as if someone whispered something in her ear. The voice was very beautiful, with an angelic and gentle tone.
She remembers when she was little, someone once told her a story.
Legend has it that a long time ago, there was a beautiful place called the City of No Tears, where the people were happy angels. Because they were happy, they had no tears. Later, the angels fell, and blue rain floated in the sky. The place was still called the City of No Tears. However, the people’s eyes had dried up…
Chapter 4: Light tempts with desire, and then leads to enlightenment
“The scroll you are looking at is called a “thangka”. It is a type of painting that originated during the Songtsen Gampo period. It depicts the Buddha of Joy, a male and female Buddha. The male Buddha is called the Lord of Wisdom, and the female Buddha is his consort. There is a legend about the Buddha of Joy in India.’
The professor wiped his glasses and said, ‘According to legend, the king, who worshipped Brahmanism, was cruel by nature and massacred Buddhists. Sakyamuni then sent Guanyin to transform into a beautiful woman and have sex with him. The king, intoxicated by the woman, was finally conquered by the beauty and converted to Buddhism, and finally became the main deity on the Buddhist altar.’
Someone whispered in their seat, ‘Isn’t this a magnificent picture of a sexual intercourse…’
There was a burst of laughter in the classroom, and upon closer inspection, it really was.
On the thangka, a man and a woman are sitting together in an embrace. The male Buddha has a fierce face and is about twice the size of the female Buddha. He is hugging her waist tightly, while her feet are wrapped around his waist. The posture doesn’t look like they are practising, but rather like the most ordinary of sexual intercourse.
Could it be that gods and Buddhas also understand the seven emotions and six desires, and know about male and female love?
The professor took a sip of tea and said slowly, ‘The Blissful Buddha is a “mind-calming tool” in tantra. Gazing at its appearance and contemplating it, one gradually becomes accustomed to it, and the desire for sex naturally disappears. This is what we often refer to as “controlling desire with desire”. The charming consort who is one with these brutal kings of wisdom is an indispensable partner in their practice. Her role in the practice is, to quote from the Buddhist scriptures, to ‘first arouse desire, and then lead it into the wisdom of the Buddha’. She offers love and lust to those brutal gods and demons, so that they can be influenced, and then leads them to the realm of the Buddha…
Some people covered their mouths and laughed, while others whispered. Everyone seemed to be endlessly intrigued by this mysterious and joyful Buddha statue.
Wei Xi looked at the two-body Buddha statue of the red disaster embracing each other, and just blankly wondered: Can lust transcend fierce demons? But can it dissolve the hostility in people’s hearts?
At the end of the class, the professor told everyone that the holiday would be in a month’s time, and that he wanted to take a group of students to Lijiang to sketch the scenery, with costs shared equally. He would lead the way, but not be responsible for any romantic encounters. Anyone who wanted to come could sign up with him.
Everyone laughed, saying that Lijiang was a great place, a city of romantic encounters, where you could believe in the miracles of human relationships.
Weixi lowered her head and silently packed her things. Her lonely figure looked out of place among the group of young people full of energy.
Zhou Xiaofan ran up to her in a few steps, excitedly took her hand and said, ‘Weixi, let’s go together. Lijiang, I’ve wanted to go there for a long time. Maybe I’ll meet a handsome Naxi guy, haha, and then I’ll be so happy.’ She put her hands together in the shape of a heart and pretended to faint.
Yes, Lijiang, a city where you can forget about time. I heard that there are golden flowers, green water, a blue sky, and the snow-capped Jade Dragon Snow Mountain that surrounds the ancient city all year round. It really is fascinating.
However, she just shook her head, tidying up her notes while saying, ‘Sorry, Xiaofan, find someone else to keep you company, I have plans for the holiday.’
‘What kind of plans could you have? You’ll just be bored at home alone, so it can’t be…’ Zhou Xiaofan slapped her playfully, ‘You’ve got a man?’
Wei Xi felt as if she had been stung by something, and looked up in surprise, her eyes staring at her in panic. But after a few seconds, she calmed down and gave a faint smile, ‘What? Don’t be ridiculous.’ Then she picked up her backpack and said, ‘Sorry, Xiaofan, there’s nothing else. I have to go first, see you tomorrow.’
Zhou Xiaofan looked at Wei Xi’s slender back and just felt that something was not quite right with her these days. In the past, although Weixi was quiet and reserved, as if deliberately keeping a distance from others, she was a girl who was cold on the outside but warm on the inside.
But now, it seemed like she had become a different person. When others called her name, she seemed startled, and it took her a long time to respond. She was distracted all day long, and even in class she would daydream.
What can I say? It was as if she were a small animal waiting to be tortured by the hunter, with innocent eyes, miserably watching as she was flayed alive.
Zhou Xiaofan suddenly felt a chill. Why did she think of such a cruel thing?
When she looked back, she saw that the classroom was already empty. The professor had forgotten to turn off the computer, and the big screen was still displaying the happy Buddha statue. The king of light was embracing his naked concubine, but his eyes were fixed on her, as if they had a life of their own and were cold and sinister.
Zhou Xiaofan felt a sudden panic for no reason. It was so evil!
A prestigious school with a hundred years of history, even the side entrance is decorated with extraordinary grandeur. Wei Xi moved slowly along the tree-lined path, wishing that the road would never end.
But no matter how long the road is, there will always be an end. When she reached the end, she would have to meet someone she didn’t want to see and face something she didn’t want to face.
A magnificent Bentley was already waiting there, and the well-dressed driver respectfully opened the door for her, as if it was only natural.
But God knows, just a few days ago, they were still strangers who had no connection, living their own lives without being allowed to get close.
Wei Xi glanced at the man beside her out of the corner of her eye. He was still so busy, even in the car, he didn’t rest. In fact, ever since the day she met him, all she had seen was him working hard. Sometimes she felt that he really looked like the little girl in the fairy tale who wore the red dancing shoes, dancing without stopping as long as she lived.
If a person spends two-thirds of their life earning money, she wonders what joy they can have. If there is no joy, what is the point of having so much wealth?
Raising the corner of her lips, Weixi scoffs a little at her own narrow-mindedness. How can a proud son of heaven fathom the thoughts of a mortal like her?
She has never been able to fathom him, while he can always see right through her. That is why this has never been an equal match from the start.
Like that morning, when she got out of his car and returned to the rented room that was like a pigeonhole. Ruifei had been waiting at home and hadn’t slept a wink.
As soon as she came in, looking tired, he took her from head to toe, as if he were afraid she was missing something.
Ruifei kept asking her what had happened last night.
What had happened that night?
Incredibly, nothing had happened that night. She had fallen asleep in the car, and he had let her sleep like that without waking her.
She was awakened by the chirping of birds, and when she opened her eyes, she saw his sleeping face, bathed in the golden morning light, so quiet.
He had fallen asleep leaning against the seat, and she was still covered in his suit jacket. Their car was parked by the lake, and the driver had long since disappeared.
She was in a daze, just staring at him, at his eyelashes in the sunlight, at his quiet profile. He had beautiful lips, but they were very thin, and they say that men with thin lips are often fickle…
She turned away in a panic only when he woke up. He looked at her for a long time, as if deep in thought. He didn’t say anything, and she was silent too. It was so quiet in the car that you could only hear the birds chirping, and it was another new day.
‘Where do you live? I’ll give you a lift.’ His face was slightly tired, and after stretching his neck a little, he opened the car door, sat in the driver’s seat and started the engine.
She said an address, but regretted it as soon as she exited. She shouldn’t have told him, which meant that in the future she might be entangled with him.
But even if she didn’t say anything, what did it matter? In this world, if you really want to find someone, you can always find them.
Just as he did with her.
No matter what she hoped for in her heart or prayed to God, his car would still appear at the side entrance of the school every day waiting for her.
And she had no right to say no, not then and not now.
Then he would choose a restaurant with a quiet environment but in a remote location. After they finished eating, he would drive her to the road closest to ‘Perfect Beauty’ and sit in the car watching her walk in. Every day, rain or shine.
He is unassuming, unassuming, and unobtrusive. He just quietly and punctually appears in front of her. Every time he doesn’t say much, and rarely even makes eye contact with her. When he doesn’t speak, he is even more aloof, which makes people feel unnerved for no reason, but they dare not escape.
He is charming and polite, and has never acted inappropriately. He has never even touched her hand, but she still feels on edge.
It was as if he had become her shadow, a huge, dark, silent shadow. He was also like the dark cloud in the sun, not too big, not too small, but just covering up all her brightness.
She didn’t believe that he didn’t need to socialise, and there were plenty of romantic affairs in the world of fame and fortune. Even if she was isolated from the news, she knew that he had always acted in a low-key manner, but he was never free from scandals. But he has the time, patience and interest to continue this unequal game of cat and mouse, and he enjoys it.
She is really tired. This protracted mental stress has exhausted her and she is on the verge of collapse. She would rather he was openly hostile towards her, as she had initially thought, and took what he wanted and left her alone, than be on edge every day, fearing his seemingly humble gentlemanly demeanour.
Sometimes she really wondered if he was doing this on purpose to torment her poor, over-strung nerves.
‘You’ve lost some weight, haven’t you?‘ Ruan Shaonan put down his glass, rested his chin in one hand, and stared at the person across from him, who had grown so thin that the slightest breeze could blow him away.
’Has studying been too hard? Or is the work at the nightclub not going well?’ He seemed in a chatty mood today.
How could studying be hard? Wei Xi mused, that was an opportunity she had worked hard to get, and even if it was really hard, it was also sweet to her.
As for work, she and Ru Fei had never been better off since leaving the orphanage, thanks to him.
So you see, God is fair, and while you lose something, you are always given something in compensation, even if it is a drop in the bucket.
‘Maybe next time you could try not to look so reluctant when you eat with me.”
She shuddered and suddenly looked up. But he wasn’t looking at her, and it seemed that all his attention was on the steak in front of him. He hadn’t been paying any attention to what she had just said.
But the wind stopped at that moment, and the air froze like a block of ice. Even the oxygen became a little thin, making it hard to breathe.
‘Winter vacation is in a month. What are your plans?‘ He changed the subject.
’My tutor is organising a group of students to go to Lijiang to sketch,‘ she whispered.
He pondered for a moment and said, “Why not go to Europe? How about Paris? I’ll be there on business in a few days. We can stay in Paris for a while and I’ll introduce you to the professors at the Paris Fine Arts Academy.”
The dust had settled, and he didn’t even ask if she wanted to go.
What was this?
’It’s about time. Let’s go,’ He placed the cutlery on the table, wiped his lips elegantly with a napkin, then took out his card and handed it to the waiter.
Wei Xi lowered her head and looked at her fingers, which were shaking as she held the knife and fork.
These days, she had been holding back, holding back.
But now, she really couldn’t hold back anymore, and she had completely lost to him. She would rather he gave her a quick death, but he was like a cat playing with a mouse, or a cunning executioner. He had tortured her mind to the point of blood and flesh, unable to cry for help, but deliberately prolonging the execution, reserving the right to slaughter alone.
This feeling of being on the verge of an abyss made her unable to bear it anymore.
‘Almost forgot…’ He suddenly pushed a jewellery box in front of her.
Weixi was stunned for a moment, and before she could come back from her surprise, he opened the lid of the box on his own. Inside was a sparkling diamond necklace, with a very unique pendant design, like an exquisite key.
He took the necklace out and walked over to Weixi, putting it around her neck. Weixi’s skin was pale, making the diamonds even more dazzling.
There weren’t many customers in the restaurant, and everyone looked on with interest. They could only think that this was a couple in love, and the man’s handsome appearance and gallant posture made all the women envious. An old man looked at them and smiled, as if to say to Weixi, ‘My child, look, how happy you are.’
Was she really happy?
Wei Xi looked at the man in front of her with some stiffness, while he remained suave and unruffled, with no hint of embarrassment on his normally composed face. Not even a smile. His expression was as indifferent as the cold rain that day. His cold lips touched Wei Xi’s equally cold forehead. The coldness of the two of them was as desolate and desperate as a wasteland.
Wei Xi turned her face away. Outside the window, the lights were just beginning to come on, and passers-by were coming from the south and going north. Some people came in pairs, others laughed and joked as they went by. Only she, sitting alone in a barren wilderness, looked up at the sky…
When Weixi walked into the powder room, she was fixing her makeup in the mirror. When she looked up, she saw Weixi resting her face on her shoulder, tired like a bird without wings.
‘So today you’re still picking me up from school, eating with me, and walking me to work, the silent trilogy?’
“Yes.’
‘What does he want? Killing someone is not that hard, but what does he want?‘ Ruifei sounded a little indignant.
Weixi gave a bitter smile, “If only I knew. Maybe he wants to drive me crazy with this silent trilogy and then send me to the asylum. Unfortunately, he doesn’t know that I’m actually a ”little strong person’. I may look weak and vulnerable, but I’m mentally incredibly strong.‘
’Haha…’ Ruifei laughed dryly, ’That’s not funny.’
Wei Xi thought, it really wasn’t funny, especially when you were the one in the middle of the bad joke.
Ru Fei suddenly remembered something, ‘Wei Xi, today is Xiao Wen’s seventh day.’
Wei Xi was startled. Yes, today was Xiao Wen’s seventh day. They had contributed to the funeral expenses together with several other sisters. How could she have forgotten such an important thing?
‘Where are her ashes?’ Wei Xi asked.
‘Wu took them. He couldn’t get in touch with her family. Wu just got back from an art exhibition in Beijing, and he came as soon as he heard the news. An old man, holding Xiao Wen’s ashes, crying like anything, it was hard for people to watch.’
Mo Ruifei lit a cigarette and rubbed the corner of her eyes. ‘When he left, he cried and said that he wanted to take Xiaowen to Beijing to see Tiananmen Square and the Great Wall, which had been her greatest wish while she was alive. I really didn’t expect that he was sincere about Xiaowen. Unfortunately, she didn’t have the fortune…’
She couldn’t continue, so she just smoked fiercely. The fire between her fingers flickered and looked like a red tear in the silent darkness.
Chapter 5: Noble Stray Dogs
It was late at night, and there were still no stars in the city’s night sky. Lu Weixi took a garbage bag and went alone to the nightclub’s back alley. This was probably the darkest place in the entire city, and not even the moonlight would dare to descend here, except for the occasional sight of a few beggars huddled in the corner and mice foraging for food.
Putting the rubbish in the incinerator, pouring petrol on it, lighting a match and throwing it in – she was familiar with the whole process, as it was part of her job at the bar.
When the flickering flames reddened her eyes, Lu Weixi looked up, not knowing what she was looking at. Perhaps she wasn’t looking at anything, but it had become a habit.
A habit to ease her sadness.
The nights in this city are so long. If you don’t light up the darkness for yourself, who will save you?
She took Ruifei’s cigarette, lit one, and took a light drag. The taste was spicier than she expected. She placed it to the west, then took out a stack of drawing paper from a bag. On the paper were vivid faces, lifelike.
Xiaowen, Coco, Ah Feng…and Ruifei and herself. This was what she had drawn for each of her friends since she started working at Jue Se.
The night wind of the city brushed past her fingers, leaving a cold sensation. The rosy flames danced in the night wind, the sound of the wind muffled, and the ashes scattered by the wind looked like black butterflies fluttering in the vast darkness.
She looked at the young and melancholy face of Xiaowen on the drawing paper. She was a beautiful woman who, like Ruifei, could not put down her cigarette all day. However, the way she smoked was very sad, an expression that did not belong in this world.
So, ever since then, she had had a hunch: a woman like this could not go far in the world.
Wei-xi sighed softly, looked down at Ru-fei’s cigarette and saw that it was a Mild Seven.
She remembered Ru-fei saying that cigarettes, like alcohol, could temporarily numb the pain of memories when the soul was in turmoil, if you didn’t mind drinking poison to quench your thirst.
Was it really that effective?
Wei Xi doubts, puts a cigarette to her lips, and just as she is about to light it…
‘Hey, don’t you dare!’
Before she can react, the cigarette is rudely snatched away from her lips.
However, the uninvited guest just smiled and didn’t say anything. The black jacket was casually draped over his shoulders, and he held the cigarette he had taken from her in his hand as he lit it. The bright red flame reflected in his fine black hair and shiny eyes, and it seemed as if the man’s pupils had turned red as well, making him look less human and more like a fallen angel from legend.
Wei Xi was a little shaken. She had long known that he was an exceptionally handsome man. But seeing him on such a bleak night, against such a desolate backdrop, still made her heart flutter.
He came over and stood next to her, looking at the blazing fire with her. Wei Xi could smell a unique, dry scent beyond the fireworks, like the deep earth. However, when he turned his face and smiled at her, there was always an indescribable evil in his gaze and posture.
It was truly puzzling that this man could have both a clean and a bad quality at the same time.
‘The guy who sold you the cigarettes must be a handsome guy.‘ Chi Mo’s teeth were white when she smiled, and she looked very handsome and clean during the day, making people want to kiss him. But at night, he looked like some kind of beast that hunts, with a sinister aura.
’Huh? How did you know?‘
’People with asthma shouldn’t smoke. You’ve known this common sense since you were a child. If he wasn’t a handsome guy, why would you be so desperate?’
Chi Mo suddenly brought his handsome face close to hers and smiled wickedly, ‘Am I right?’
‘Totally wrong. The cigarettes were a gift from Ru Fei. How was I supposed to know if the guy was round or flat?’ Wei Xi took a step back. Ever since the day they met, he had liked teasing her like this. Although she had long since known that his temperament was bluffing, with a touch of cynicism. But being this close to a beautiful face always made one’s heart beat faster.
‘Hey, blushing?”
Wei Xi took another step back and discerned, “That’s because you’re too close.”
But the more Wei Xi panicked, the more Chi Mo was willing to play up, deliberately speaking close to her, “It seems even redder.”
Wei Xi hurriedly took a big step back, but in her haste she didn’t pay attention to her feet and almost tripped over a piece of wood. Fortunately, Chi Mo was quick and grabbed her.
‘I told you you were too close,‘ said Chi Mo, as he pulled Wei Xi into his arms. She looked at him in shock, her cheeks flushed.
’Okay, I’m not teasing you anymore, you’re made of glass,‘ said Chi Mo, suddenly serious, letting go of her and then taking something out of his jacket pocket and handing it to her.
’Here, this is for you.”
Wei Xi took it and looked at it, immediately becoming happy, ’Wow, fried chestnuts with sugar, is this all for me?’
Chi Mo pinched her chin and laughed, ‘Yes, silly girl.’
Chi Mo was four years older than Wei Xi and had always taken care of her and loved her very much. However, in Wei Xi’s opinion, this was just love for a loved one. Because, Chi Mo was Ru Fei’s partner, although Ru Fei himself never admitted it.
There were really too many people who liked Chi Mo, and almost no woman who hung out in the red light district didn’t know him. He was like a beautiful beast that every woman wanted to own. But apart from Ru Fei, Wei Xi has never seen Chi Mo stay with anyone for long. Therefore, Wei Xi took Ru Fei’s flat denial as a low-key approach to avoid arousing jealousy.
Speaking of Chi Mo, his experience can be called legendary even in this ‘talented’ red light district.
His father was a second-generation Japanese orphan left in China. In the 1980s, he returned to Japan with his mother and was resettled by the government in Shinjuku to live on public assistance.
He was born in Japan and grew up in Shinjuku. He speaks both Chinese and Japanese and, as a teenager, hung out in Kabukicho. In that place, where there was a mix of all kinds of nationalities, languages, plots and violence, he followed a group of outlaws who were also ‘second kind’ orphans and got on like fish in water.
He was a skilled fighter, had a keen sense, was cunning and indifferent, and kept to himself. He was once employed by various entertainment venues as a bodyguard, but in reality he was a thug. He didn’t belong to any organisation, but attracted a large number of followers.
The life of a drifter, a job with no tomorrow, all of this seemed very cool to women, full of the decadence of postmodernism. But in Wei Xi’s eyes, Chi Mo was just a child.
He was only twenty-five years old. What were other twenty-five-year-old boys doing? Were they, like him, always living in danger?
If not, then Chi Mo is a wild dog living alone, noble and free, but with… unimaginable wounds.
Wei Xi believes that this may be the best interpretation of the man in front of her.
There is an abandoned basketball court at the end of the alley. Every time Wei Xi comes here to burn rubbish, she comes over here to get some fresh air, to be honest, she is just being lazy.
At the moment, she and the handsome guy Chi Mo were sitting on the overturned basketball hoop, looking at the quiet blue sky of the city and eating hot candied chestnuts, which was really indescribably pleasant.
‘Aren’t you working in the front hall? Why do you have time to come over and give this to me?’ Wei Xi shook the bag in her hand and kept talking without taking a break.
‘You haven’t been back for a long time, so I was a bit worried and asked to come and check things out. They’re here in the front hall, so I don’t need to keep an eye on things.‘ Chi Mo stubbed out his cigarette and grabbed a freshly roasted chestnut from Wei Xi’s hand, stuffing it in his mouth.
’She’s been a bit jumpy since the last incident. How are things? Are you getting used to it here?‘ Wei Xi simply opened another one for him. This guy always liked to grab other people’s food.
’We’re both just working for someone else, so it’s not like I’m getting used to anything.’
‘But you never wanted to come here before, even though Wei Chengbao lured you more than once. You never liked him, but now you have to work under him?”
Chi Mo said nonchalantly, “I didn’t accept Wei Chengbao’s offer because the chances of being cannon fodder by his side were much higher than elsewhere. But now he’s offering a price that’s several times higher than anyone else’s, and I’m a money-grubber, so how could I not be tempted?”
Wei Xi didn’t think much of what he said, ’It’s because of Ru Fei, isn’t it? Why be so cool when you’re worried about her and just say it?‘
Chi Mo turned his face to look at her, his eyes smiling almost mockingly, “If you don’t know anything, don’t be so self-righteous. Do you think you’ll be any different if I’m in ”Peerless Beauty’? I know what happened between you and Ru Fei that day, but I’m telling you, even if I was there, I would just stand and watch. You’re in this circle, so you have to accept the rules of the game here. You, me, Ru Fei, all of us. Here, if someone helps you, it means someone wants to harm you. If someone approaches you, they want to take advantage of you. Don’t be naive and think that someone can be your support. Because sooner or later you will find that the person who causes you the most harm is often the person you trust the most.”
Chi Mo threw away the chestnut shell in his hand and lit a cigarette. ’What happened between you two that day means nothing to me. So don’t expect anything from me. I’m not a good person, and what I did in the past will, believe me, definitely exceed your imagination.’
Chi Mo left, and Weixi was left alone, staring up at the night sky. It was quiet, and every now and then you could hear the chirping of a cicada. Perhaps it was because the place was so remote, or perhaps it was because the stars were so dim today, or perhaps it was because the man’s undisguised ridicule made people feel despondent.
Sigh… Weixi sighed at the night sky. The stars twinkled, like Ruifei’s eyes.
Although she has long since known that she must take charge of her own life, she cannot help harbouring a little fantasy in her heart. She dreams that one day, someone will become the hero of Ruifei’s life, loving her as passionately as she loves herself.
Then, even if one day she has to leave him, Ruifei will not have to live alone in the crowd, feeling that there is nothing to live for.
But in the end, all of this is just wishful thinking.
Chapter 6: Living a drunken dream
After work, everyone had arranged to meet at a food stall for a late-night snack. CoCo naturally brought her cool, rock-and-roll boyfriend Mark, while Feng brought along his girlfriend Meimei, who had come from her hometown to work. Ruo Fei and Chi Mo were naturally a couple, but Wenxi was alone, but she was happy and at ease.
There were seven people, occupying eight chairs.
They were always very noisy when they got together, and even the owner of the snack bar was afraid of them. Today, however, it was surprisingly quiet. It wasn’t until Feng raised his glass and said to the empty chair, ‘To Xiaowen,’
that everyone raised their glasses and poured the beer in their glasses onto the floor.
The women in the red light district are like duckweed, cheap as ants. Even though life passes by like water, tragedies are played out every day, and life goes on.
Everyone seemed to be a little more relaxed, chatting with each other. Weixi was a little quiet today. If she wasn’t, she would have been as lively as usual, constantly arguing with Mark and determined to get this wild hunk drunk.
CoCo was happy to watch the show from the sidelines, simply not helping anyone. These days, people despise those who value sex over friendship as much as those who value friendship over sex.
The young couple Feng and Xiao kept their heads close together as they spoke, like two little mice in love. Chi Mo was always quiet in situations like this, and when someone told a bad joke, he just laughed along.
The TV was showing a chaotic mix of entertainment and gossip news, and Wei Xi watched it with little interest while she picked at the not-quite-fresh shrimp.
Suddenly, a scene caught her eye.
The news was broadcasting a scene from a charity auction, and Ruan Shaonan’s face flashed across the screen. Then the camera focused on a diamond necklace placed in a glass case, and a close-up was dedicated to the chic-looking pendant.
Wei Xi wiped her eyes and made sure that she was not mistaken, that it was indeed the same necklace she was wearing around her neck.
‘The highlight of this year’s charity auction is undoubtedly this diamond necklace named “Key of Hope”. Its blue centre diamond weighs 7.8 carats and is said to be the token of love between the last Queen of Italy, Maria Pia of Savoy, and her lover. Not only is the craftsmanship superb, but it also has very high historical value…’
The entertainment reporter’s vivid report attracted the attention of most of the diners.
Then, I saw the auctioneer shaking hands with Yuen Shiu Nam, and Wang Dongyang next to him took over the precious auction item, with countless flashes of the camera.
Then, the camera panned, and the image of Yuen Shiu Nam being blocked by a group of rabid reporters and leaving under the protection of the staff was captured. It was a rare sight to see other celebrities and gentlemen being left out.
No wonder, he is the talk of the town, but rarely appears in front of the media, so the paparazzi naturally won’t let go.
The beautiful female entertainment reporter, holding a microphone, said with infinite emotion, ‘Everyone can see that after Yitian Group Chairman Ruan Shaonan purchased this treasure at an absolutely advantageous price, he refused to give an interview to the media and hurriedly left. This is a pity that has to be mentioned. However, everyone can see Mr. Ruan’s kind act. In recent years, Yitian Group has been actively involved in various charitable activities…’
After that, she didn’t have the heart to listen to the flattery. She subconsciously touched her own neck, her heart racing.
‘What a rich man,’ CoCo, sitting next to her, shook her head in envy, ‘spending that much money on a necklace, enough for us to eat for a lifetime.’
Then she touched the one that Wei Xi was wearing around her neck, and asked curiously, ‘Wei Xi, where did you buy this imitation? It’s quite similar.’
Wei Xi pointed to the corner of the street, ‘Wu Ji, 20 yuan a piece, you can order it.’
If she hadn’t coughed up a mouthful of wine and slapped the table with her hand, laughing until she was doubled over, this would really be the coldest joke of the year.
Wei Xi glared at her angrily, but unfortunately she didn’t see it.
‘Hey, I heard that Ruan Shaonan has started a full-scale pursuit of Taihuang Group. Is there any insider information?’
The voice came from the next table. Wei Xi turned her face and saw two white-collar men chatting.
Why does everyone want to talk about him? Wei Xi thought listlessly.
‘I’m just a small clerk at Yitian, how could I possibly know what’s going on upstairs? But everyone says that Taihuang is in deep trouble this time.’
“No way, Lu Zixu is an old fox who has dominated the industry for so many years, how could he be so easily eaten?’
‘Unfortunately, this time he has run into a lion, a lion that eats foxes. Have you forgotten the ‘Huasheng acquisition case’ that caused a huge uproar last time? Sheng Liancheng was cunning enough, right? What happened in the end? He was forced to jump to his death by Ruan Shaonan. And there was the ‘Xingye acquisition case’. The Li family had a lot of money, but they couldn’t save the company even if they went bankrupt. And…’
The content suddenly became a bit gory. Wei Xi felt her palms sweating and her body shivering, as if she had returned to that cold rainy evening. She really wanted to make the two annoying guys shut up, but unfortunately they were in the middle of a heated discussion and just kept talking.
‘So the financial world is going to be reshuffled,’ the people at the other table seemed to be quite interested as well. Men get together and the topic is invariably money, cars and women.
It’s exciting to be the centre of attention, and the young white-collar worker is even more eager to dish the dirt.
“It’s not just a reshuffle, it’s a regime change. Our boss has always been decisive and ruthless. Look at all the good deeds he’s doing now, it’s like he’s building up good karma. But then again, if you were in his shoes, you’d do the same. The business world is like a battlefield, and in this circle, human feelings are just a matter of course…’
Wei Xi couldn’t sit still anymore, but everyone was fascinated by the gossip about Ruan Shaonan. CoCo in particular couldn’t wait to listen with her ears pricked.
If she hadn’t noticed Wei Xi’s increasingly unpleasant expression, she would have knocked on her glass with her chopsticks and shouted, ‘Hey, I’m saying, the rich have their pastimes, and we have our own pleasures. Hey Mark, play the guitar for everyone. If you don’t show off your charm, CoCo’s soul will be stolen.’
Without saying a word, Mark immediately threw away his cigarette, picked up the guitar, and casually played a passionate and unrestrained dance song. If he hadn’t screamed while holding the cigarette, he would have dragged Coco to the street, and with the rhythm of the guitar, they would have danced like free gypsy girls, happily and unrestrainedly twisting their slender waists.
Everyone laughed and applauded, blowing kisses at them. The stars in the sky turned into lamps, and the concrete road became a stage. At that moment, there was no Ruan Shaonan, no Yi Tian Group, no bloody battles in the shopping mall, and no annoying things at all.
Many years later, when Wei Xi thought back to this autumn night of drunken joy, she still remembered: in this place forgotten by God, they were angels abandoned on earth, deprived of glory and unable to return to heaven.
But at that moment, their bright youth, with wings ready to fly, bloomed as brilliantly as fireworks, embracing life with fervour…
They had truly owned this wonderful time, and that was enough.
It was close to midnight before everyone dispersed, drunk and exhausted. Fortunately, it was the weekend, so Wei Xi could sleep in. If it wasn’t for Ru Fei, who seemed really drunk and was supported by Chi Mo as they walked away, Wei Xi would have been even more drunk.
Wei Xi went home alone. She didn’t have to worry about Ru Fei, and even if Chi Mo was bad, he wouldn’t sell her out.
The place where Chi Mo lived was actually not much better than Wei Xi and their rented house. The pigeon-cage-like shed-roofed house was cold in winter and hot in summer. He was used to living alone, and the house was clean.
Chi Mo hugged Ru Fei as she took a shower in the lukewarm water. It was probably because she had been drinking, but Ru Fei’s face was very red, and she looked up at the man holding her, like a tipsy flower.
Chi Mo lowered his head and kissed her, a kiss that was unilaterally solicited. Ru Fei was probably really drunk, her arms hooked around the man’s neck as she giggled non-stop. He grabbed her hair to keep her pretty little head from moving around, feeling the softness of her fingertips.
If she didn’t like long hair, she was crazy about short hair as a fashion statement. You’re always bored of a hairstyle faster than it’s fashionable. In short, she’s fickle.
And Chi Mo happens to appreciate that about her.
He pushes her down on his springy bed, feels for the condom under the pillow, and rips the wrapper open with his teeth. Her silent, bright eyes, in the dark, look like those of a leopard ready to pounce.
The old springs creaked during sex. He could almost hear a song, a rather sad tune, if only he wasn’t humming it himself. She was really drunk, and he couldn’t remember how many times he had brought this drunk cat home. Almost every time she did something amazing, and then managed to forget it all the next morning.
In that respect, he really admired her, for being so carefree.
‘Do you know what we’re doing?’ He held her face in his hands. Having sex with a woman who was unconscious felt like drugging her, and he felt the need to remind her.
If she didn’t laugh, her delicate fingers would stroke his face, imitating his tone of voice and deliberately prolonging her words as she replied, “I know…” Then she would press her fingers against his pretty lips and say mysteriously, “Shh, I’ll sing for you.”
At that moment, Chi Mo really wanted to throw her out.
It was almost dawn, and Chi Mo was fast asleep. If he hadn’t been sitting on the windowsill in his shirt, smoking a cigarette, the city in front of him would have been at its darkest before dawn.
How do you describe the feeling of being the only one awake when everyone else is asleep? It’s a bit like being the only one awake when everyone else is drunk.
In fact, Ru was not just an average drinker, he was even better than Chi Mo had imagined.
She had never been the type to get drunk so easily.
Legend has it that there are two types of people who are drunk in the world. One type of person lives in the midst of the lights and colours of the world, but is incredibly clear-headed. The other type is the opposite: they are calm and collected at all times, turning the tides with the turn of a hand. What makes them drunk is their spirit.
Obviously, she is the first type of person.
If she hadn’t smiled, there would still be the scent of this man on her lips, but there is a black hole in her heart, as if it were an abyss with no bottom, dark and gloomy, as if all the darkness in the world had been boiled inside, so deep that there is no end in sight.
She looks at the sleeping back of the man in bed. She likes to look at his back. His front is too arrogant and cold, making people feel unapproachable. His back, on the other hand, is like that of a quiet child, with a warm and gentle silhouette.
If she didn’t sigh, every time she didn’t want to have sex with him, when she was in a low mood, when she was sad, when she was upset, she would pretend to be drunk. Unfortunately, Chi Mo couldn’t read her every time, or maybe he didn’t want to read her.
The moment he came in, she actually wanted to cry.
She knew that he admired her for turning around beautifully and letting go cleanly.
She knew that he liked her body and longed for her scent.
She knew that from the first day they met, she had never had any expectations for him.
She knew the pain in his heart. Countless nights, the loneliness that could not be expressed in words, had been painfully and clearly released in her body.
But she lay there on the uncomfortable spring bed, looking at his face as he immersed himself in lust. His eyes were closed, his lips slightly parted, as if he were in a very beautiful place, and that place had her.
For a moment, she was tempted to tell him that she really didn’t care about anything.
But she didn’t say anything.
She knew exactly what the result would be, so it was better to keep quiet.
If she hadn’t turned her face, opened the window, and felt the coolness of the dew on her outstretched arm, her lonely heart would have felt like the light breeze between the buildings.
She gently closed her eyes…
Chapter 7: The butcher’s chopping board
If she didn’t know any better, she would think that on that same night, in another corner of the city, there was someone just like her, counting the stars in the night sky before dawn.
Wei-Xi sat on her bed, looking at the necklace hanging from her finger. The blue centre stone was still shining in the night, just like the ‘Heart of the Ocean’ in ‘Titanic’ that had made countless fans swoon.
She remembered that its name was ‘Key to Hope’. Ruan Shaonan bought it at a price she could never imagine, and then put it around her neck without saying a word.
After all this happened, she seemed to understand something, but also seemed to have understood nothing.
She didn’t want to think about it anymore, lying in bed, and was tormented by anxiety, unable to sleep. She simply turned on the radio and listened to the early morning program.
An old song was playing on the radio. The melody of the intro was a little sad, and perhaps it was the time of day, but even the singing voice carried the mist of the early morning.
Wei Xi poured herself a glass of ice water, looked out at the lonely city before dawn, and listened quietly.
Memories are like a storyteller
speaking in a dialect full of nostalgia
leaping over puddles and bypassing small villages
waiting for the chance of a meeting
You used mud to sculpt a city
and said that you would marry me in the future
and turn around as many times as it takes to pass through the village gate
and waste your youth…
The lyrics are beautifully written, sad but not heartbreaking. Weiwei forgot whether she had finished listening, but she remembered that she had followed the melody and hummed along, humming slowly…and falling asleep.
That night, she had a dream, a golden dream. She still didn’t remember the content of the song, but she felt that she had forgotten all her pain and was happy as if she were in heaven.
A voice kept echoing in her ears, drifting across endless years and distant times, ethereal and long-lasting, as if floating in the sky.
‘Xiaowei, you must remember, you must grow up quickly, and when you grow up, you will be my bride…’
She must have cried, cried in her dream. This voice she had hidden for so long, so long…so long that she had forgotten whether it was just a dream she had made up, or whether it had really existed.
So many years of hardship, so many painful times, so much unspeakable humiliation and pain, which she endured silently with clenched teeth.
She knew that it was not just to survive, or to live with more dignity, but because there was still a glimmer of hope in her heart. She hoped that one day, the person with whom she had made a promise would really appear in front of her and light up the darkness for her.
As promised, she grew up. But everything had changed. Her fairy tale had been twisted, becoming violent and bloody.
She sobbed like a child in this golden dream. She cried until her voice gave out, until she was curled up into a small ball, trembling with every ounce of strength she had.
You couldn’t hear my anguished wailing.
But do you remember?
That summer, we listened to the sound of the wind together.
Do you still miss it?
Those little promises we made when we were little.
Do you still believe in them?
I was in hell, looking up at the sun, looking up at you…
When I woke up, the room was dark and the sun had set.
Wei Xi looked at the clock. The hour hand pointed to 5pm. She had slept the whole day. If she hadn’t come back, she must have been with Chi Mo.
She hadn’t eaten all day, but her stomach felt like it was full of stones. She had no appetite at all, and her headache felt like it was going to split open. She went into the bathroom and turned on the light. She saw her reflection in the mirror: her hair was messy, her eyes red and puffy.
She remembered that in the evening, Ruan Shaonan had asked her out to dinner.
She quickly washed her face, changed her clothes, grabbed the things she needed to bring, went downstairs, walked two blocks, and saw Ruan Shaonan’s car parked there.
Wei Xi opened the car door and got in. The driver started the engine, and the car seemed to melt into the city’s surging traffic like a drop of water.
‘Why are your eyes red? Have you been crying?‘ Ruan Shaonan was looking at the performance report and glanced at Wei Xi in the corner of his eye before going back to his work.
’I’ve been lying down all day, so I’ve probably slept too much.”
He raised the corners of his lips in a half smile and asked with a hint of sarcasm, ’Is that so?’
Wei Xi felt a chill down her spine. This man, Rui De, was downright scary.
She took a deep breath and finally made up her mind. ‘Mr. Ruan, I think we need to talk.’
‘Talk about what?’ He didn’t even look at her, as if he wasn’t the least bit interested in her proposal.
Wei Xi opened her backpack and took out the beautiful jewelry box, placing it on the seat. ‘Maybe we can start with this. It’s too valuable for me.’
Ruan Shaonan didn’t take it seriously, speaking as if he were dealing with a child throwing a tantrum, ‘So that’s what this is about. It seems we have different understandings of the meaning of “expensive”. It’s just a trinket, if you don’t like it, just throw it away.’
Wei Xi suddenly realised that she was completely unable to communicate with the man in front of her.
‘And this…’ Wei Xi simply emptied the contents of her backpack, a total of twelve wads of red banknotes.
‘This is the money you gave me, or perhaps I should say, the money you paid for me. If you don’t want to exercise your rights, then I will also withdraw my obligations. And to ensure that you don’t incur any costs, please take the money back.”
Ruan Shaonan turned his face to look at her, his eyes as cold as ice. Wei Xi knew that she had finally succeeded in getting his attention. But she wasn’t happy about it, because her intuition told her that the man in front of her was in a temper, and she…seemed to have come too close to him. Her heart was pounding so loudly it seemed to be in her throat.
‘Of course, if you want to pay for the goods now, I have no objection. You are the buyer, so you can do whatever you like. But after dawn, please allow us to go our separate ways.’
Hearing this, Wei Xi felt like she was on the verge of a heart attack.
She looked at him helplessly, almost pleading, ‘Mr. Ruan, I really don’t have the energy to waste any more time with you. I’m just an ordinary student, I want to live my own life. Please, for the love of God, just leave me alone…”
With a loud crack, Ruan Shaonan almost roughly shut the laptop, and Wei Xi was startled by his sudden action.
He didn’t say a word and didn’t look at her. The car was on the road, and the air in the car was almost stagnant, with only the engine’s whine to be heard.
He finally turned his face and looked at her as if with a deep meaning. Suddenly, he smiled lightly, ‘You’re right, I am the buyer. Whether I let you go depends on my mood. In fact, I’m very happy with you, and I don’t want to let you go. Even if you commit yourself to me today, it’s just an excuse for me to tie you down. So…’ He suddenly grabbed her chin with one hand, and his cold fingers made her heart freeze. ‘Trying to provoke me into letting you go? I’ll tell you, this idea sucks. With your mediocre skills, I advise you to save it.”
Wei-xi was almost desperate, looking at him helplessly, ’Ruan Shaonan, killing is not beyond the point. Even if you want to take revenge, but there is a head for grievances and a master for debts. Don’t you think you’re going too far by bullying a girl who has no ability to resist?’
The man looked at her with wide eyes, unable to name what he saw.
Wei Xi bit her tongue until it hurt, but she finally spoke, even with a hint of a smile, ‘You see, when you first saw me, I was only fourteen. So many years have passed, and we have both changed so much that I have almost forgotten what you look like, and you probably can’t recognise me either. But you won’t forget my name. To be precise, you won’t forget anyone in our Lu family, will you?’
Wei Xi looked into the man’s eyes and gazed straight at him, as if she were trying to travel through time and search for the handsome young man in her memory.
“My surname is Lu, and Lu Zixu, the chairman of the Taihuang Group, is my father. He is the one who caused your family to be destroyed. To be precise, we have a feud that goes back generations. You won’t forget…’
The car finally came to a stop, and the driver got out and disappeared quickly. Wei Xi had no idea where they were, and the man beside her was eerily silent.
‘You want revenge, and there’s no denying that. But please choose the right target.’ Wei Xi felt she had to make her position clear, otherwise she was afraid she would be more than cannon fodder tonight.
‘You may have investigated me, so you should know that I left the Lu family seven years ago. To them, I am just a forgotten daughter they abandoned. They don’t care if I live or die. And I was just a child back then, so I had nothing to do with the Ruan family’s tragedy. So you shouldn’t take out your hatred on me. Theoretically, I am innocent…”
Ruan Shaonan interrupted her with a cold smile, ’I never thought you were innocent.’
‘What did you say?‘ Wei Xi didn’t understand what he meant.
’Back then, I was owed not just by the Lu family, but also by you!”
Wei Xi suddenly opened her eyes wide. Lu Shaonan grabbed her arm and, with a brute strength that seemed to devour people, almost dragged her off the car.
‘Ruan Shaonan, what are you doing?’ Wei Xi fell to the ground. She was terrified and desperately struggled, but she was no match for his strength.
Outside was a wide courtyard. The car had stopped in front of a villa. This was the countryside, surrounded by empty fields, and there were no people in sight, not even any servants. Or maybe there were servants, but no one dared to get involved in such a scene, and no one wanted to get involved.
Ruan Shaonan dragged her all the way, up the stairs and into the bedroom. His face was cold and stern, and he didn’t say a word. He looked like a demon from hell, cruel and cold-blooded, and didn’t even care if he hurt her. Under the man’s brute force, Wei Xi felt like a lamb being led to the slaughter. No matter how pitifully she screamed, no one paid any attention.
He threw her onto the carpet and slammed the door behind him. Then he removed his jacket and tie with alacrity, before tearing open his shirt with a single jerk, and the crystal buttons fell with a crackling sound onto the carpet.
This was a cruel hint!
Wei Xi struggled to get up from the floor and stumbled towards the door, but he grabbed her hair and pulled her back.
The round bed was a pale aqua blue, like the deep sea, full of romance, but at this moment it had become the butcher’s chopping board.
Ruan Shaonan was like a cunning executioner! He knew how to hold her down so that she could not struggle, without hurting her too much. He knew how to block her cries for help, so that she could not call for help. He also knows what kind of threats will make her completely give up and surrender.
He is also a cold-blooded executioner. He lets her hot tears flow into a river on his cheeks, and no matter how much she cries and begs, he is as unmoved as an iceberg.
The roses in the vase bloomed wildly, bright red as blood, flaunting their beautiful lives, but they could wither away in an instant. She felt a kind of near-despairing release. There was no past, no future, no hope, only a dazzlingly miserable desolation.
Her fair body was exposed in the pale moonlight, and her painful eyes rose and fell silently in his indifferent gaze.
Finally, at the critical moment, she pleaded with him in a near-broken voice, ‘Nan, Nan, please…’
In fact…she knew what he wanted to hear, she always knew.
But she couldn’t say it, not even if she bit her lips. But on the verge of breaking, his stubbornness pushed her to the brink. She never imagined that he could go this far. She was his defeated enemy, forced to submit to his coldness.
This monosyllabic nickname, an intimate secret only the two of them would share, gently circled her tongue, like a pastoral autumn wind, warm and lonely.
The Ruan and Lu families had been close friends for generations. Ruan Shaonan was a little older, but when she was a child, she never called him ‘brother’ like the other siblings. She didn’t want to feel so distant from him, so she just called him ‘Nan.’
‘So you do remember. You remember everything.’ Ruan Shaonan supported her tear-stained face. “Weiwei, you were never innocent. You owe me a promise. You promised to be my bride.”
Her tears flowed uncontrollably like a dammed river. Yes, she had always remembered, even though her life had been full of hardships and she had been disheartened and lost a thousand times over.
He hugged her trembling body as she cried, calling her name over and over, ‘Weixi, Weixi… I know, you will hate me. What I did today will surely make you hate me. But…’
He paused, cupped her face in his hands, forcing her to look into his eyes, ‘I will not let you go. Your family owes me too much, and I want to collect from everyone…including you.’
Chapter 8: The First Night
When it got light, Weixi walked out of the bedroom. She saw the gardener trimming the lawn in the courtyard and the cook preparing breakfast in the kitchen. It turned out that there were people here, but they knew how to turn into air at the right time.
The servants were all taken aback when they saw her. No wonder, last night was almost turned upside down, and it was a miracle that she was still standing here in one piece.
When Wei Xi walked out of the villa alone, no one stopped her, and she didn’t have to explain anything to anyone.
As she was about to step out the door, the early-rising driver ran up to her and asked if she needed a ride.
Wei Xi didn’t say anything, just waved her hand, and walked away without looking back.
She walked onto the highway and stopped a bus heading into the city. There were still some early risers on the bus.
As soon as she got on the bus, someone looked at her with strange eyes. Not knowing why, Wei Xi looked down and saw that her neck was covered in bruises. She then remembered that she had walked too fast and in such a hurry that she had not noticed it. She tried to cover it with her hand, but the red marks on her wrists were even more shocking.
Wei Xi sat in the last row, where it was more spacious. She curled up and hugged her knees, as if this could alleviate her discomfort. She was in severe pain and shrank into the corner of the bus, shivering. The purple and blue patches and scars on her thighs were hidden by her half-length skirt, but the bright red on her calves was hard to hide.
‘Are you okay, my child? Do you want me to call the police for you?’ An old woman next to her looked at her nervously.
She shook her head and said listlessly, ‘Thank you, no.’
Wei Xi leaned her face against the window and looked at the endless coastline. A cool sea breeze blew in, bringing with it a little golden sand.
The morning sea breeze was a little cold, and she was dressed lightly. She covered her chest with her hands and felt a twinge that made her feel dizzy. She seemed to see Ruan Shaonan’s eyes again, shining in the dark, those firm, cold eyes.
At that time, his hand was on her neck, his lips pressed against her ear, and even his breath was cold.
‘Since you were fourteen, I’ve been waiting for you to grow up. After all these years, after all this time, you’ve finally grown up and appeared before me, but you’ve forgotten me completely. Wei-xi, do you know how sad I was when I realised this? I’ve been waiting for you, waiting for you to remember me. You were right there in front of me, but I was afraid to get close, and I suffered every day from the torment of longing. But now you’re telling me that you remember everything.’
Ruan Shaonan suddenly smiled, and her fingers tightened. ‘Perhaps I really should strangle you.’
She felt a suffocating sensation, but what awaited her was not death, but something even more terrifying than death.
It was a state of living and dying at the same time, of loving and hating at the same time, of being half in heaven and half in hell, of tearing her body and soul into messy pieces and then piecing them together in a very strange way, making her almost deformed and unable to bear the pain.
‘Nan, no, please, please…’ She retreated instinctively like a frightened child, struggling in fear and panic.
But she couldn’t stop him. She couldn’t care about her dignity, trembling and pleading with him, but she couldn’t stop his coldness and determination.
He held her body down and just left her there.
She suddenly choked on a sharp pain in her body, as if she had cried and lost her breath. Her head was against the white pillowcase, her eyes wide open and staring straight at the ceiling, like a fish thrown on the shore.
His strong body covered hers, his breath cold against her ear. In an incredibly cold voice, he said to her, ‘Weixi, you are mine…’
Her mind went blank for a moment, as if she realised only then what she had lost. She pushed against the man’s strong chest, as if that would make her escape this brutal plunder, this terrible everything.
She cried and struggled in his arms like a bad-tempered child, tears falling in streams and spilling onto the man’s strong arms.
The man held her tightly, one hand holding her wrist, the other pinching her chin. His eyes were cold and quiet, and in that cruel tone he told her, ‘If you don’t want to face it, I don’t mind saying it again: you are mine. In this life, the next life, and the next life after that, you are mine. You won’t get away!’
Those last few words were almost gritted out. As if to verify his words, he took her without hesitation, lifting her slender and beautiful legs and burying himself again and again in her snow-white, trembling body. His eyes were so cold, his movements so forceful, that the luxurious antique bed creaked with each thrust, as if in some kind of punishment, without mercy.
She was in excruciating pain, her wrists held above her head by him, her eyes staring blankly at the ceiling. She bit her lips and told herself to endure it, to endure it and it would be over. Just like when she was a child, she had endured far worse humiliation and pain than this, and she had survived it.
Just bear with it a little longer…
But at that moment, the man holding her seemed to read her mind. He lifted her chin, so that her eyes, overflowing with tears, met his, reddened by desire. He looked at her with such a persistent and affectionate gaze, kissing her lovingly, as if she were the treasure of his life, as if the person in his arms was his entire being. However, if she made the slightest move, he would increase the pressure to prevent her from escaping.
Like a powerful monarch, his arms rested on either side of her face, relentlessly ravishing, possessing and enjoying. His teeth bit into her slender collarbone, his lips embraced her rosy bud, like a greedy child, like a terrible demon, provoking her frail body and the most vulnerable nerves in her head.
Her hands had wrapped around his strong back at some point, her slender legs encircling his pulsating waist, her fingernails scratching his strong skin. Her fragile body involuntarily welcomed him, with a slight sadness and a beautiful, pitiable appearance. She breathed heavily, mumbled, her cheeks flushed, her dark eyes, like water flowing in the dark, clear and blurry. Yan Hao’s pain slowly receded, and with his primitive and wild rhythm, it turned into the ultimate pleasure and ultimate sweetness.
His repeated strong plunder shattered her world and shook her body. Until the moment he reached the peak, he held her cheeks and stared intently into her dazed eyes, watching her moan and tremble under his cold gaze, how she was confused and trembling.
With his actions, he was telling her just how ridiculous her passive resistance was and just how powerless she was at that moment.
When everything had calmed down, she whimpered like a little animal in despair, tears streaming down her face. She really wanted to hate him, but then he kissed away her tears and whispered tender words in her ear at the moment when she was feeling most miserable.
He told her so many things, all kinds of distant, yellowing memories, floating softly from his beautiful lips, in a tone of infinite tenderness, caressing her pain.
The swing in the old Lu family mansion, the maple trees on Nanshan, the starlight in the wilderness, the golden autumn leaves. After the autumn wind, the courtyard always seemed to have rained golden leaves. And that beautiful butterfly kite, which was repeatedly trampled by her brothers and repeatedly repaired by him…
Many of these happy times they shared together, these fragmentary scenes and trivial details, have been forgotten by her, but he remembers them, and has kept them so well. He only hopes that when they meet again, they can take them out and reminisce, reliving the past with her through the passage of time.
But he never imagined that the long-awaited reunion would end in such sadness.
He kissed her tear-stained eyelashes, and the person in his arms was still unable to stop sobbing. He whispered softly, ‘Weixi, there must be something wrong, this is so different from the reunion I expected…’
Weixi’s tears fell drop by drop. She also wanted to know that since the age of fourteen, this man had been treasured by her for seven years, a full seven years. She had hidden him in the most secret corner of her heart, spending time alone with him without letting anyone know. Now, why is it that although they can be close to each other, there is only painful possession, and no sweet happiness as expected?
He once again covered her, pressing her slender wrists against the snow-white pillowcase, his strong muscles pressing against every inch of her softness. Her tear-filled eyes were blurred, and she trembled with pain. She looked at the man who had ruthlessly possessed her almost pleadingly, feeling as if all the energy in her body had been sucked away by something.
She had no strength to argue or resist. She just let him hold her, let him kiss her tenderly, let him take her over and over again, and let the words he had repeated countless times echo in her dark and uncertain dreams like a spell, cold and lifeless.
He said, ‘Weixi, you are mine.’
At the mere thought of this, Wei Xi felt even colder. She rubbed her arms together in a daze, as if that would warm her up. When she left, Ruan Shaonan was still asleep. He seemed to be exhausted, and she just fled without leaving a word. She didn’t dare to think about the consequences, nor did she know what the heroine in a story about love rather than revenge would do at this point.
Instinctively, all she wanted to do at that moment was to leave.
The bus had already entered the city, and after getting off, Weixi took a taxi directly home.
If Ru was not holding the ointment for bruises and sprains, looking at Weixi sweating on the bed, he would have picked up her wrist and asked, ‘What is going on?’
‘I was in the wrong place at the wrong time, negotiating with the wrong person, and he made the wrong decision. I have to suffer the consequences,’ Weixi finished in one breath and took a sip of ginger soup.
If not, after staring at her for a long time, finally shrugged helplessly, ‘You leave me speechless.’
Wei Xi nodded, and while drinking the ginger soup, said, ‘Then don’t say anything.’
Wei Xi never looked at Ru Fei again, and just kept her head down and drank the ginger soup. She knew that her reaction to this matter was too numb in Ru Fei’s eyes. But what could she do? She was still in a state of confusion herself. She had done everything she should and shouldn’t have done, everything she could and couldn’t have done, in the past ten hours.
Wei Xi knew she had made a huge mistake. She shouldn’t have blown everything apart at such a time in such a way, and had given the other person a reason to argue, a reason that clearly hurt her but could still be justified.
The phone suddenly rang. Wei Xi was drinking ginger soup and was so startled that she nearly spilled it.
Ru Fei looked at her phone and said, ‘It’s me.’
Wei Xi then remembered that she had not switched on her phone since leaving Ruan Shaonan’s villa.
Rufei was stunned when he answered the phone, then looked at Wei Xi, who was drinking the ginger soup, and handed her the phone, ‘It’s for you.’
Wei Xi’s face, which had just turned a little rosy, turned white.
Rufei looked at Wei Xi’s frightened and uncertain expression, took back the phone and answered, ‘Mr. Ruan, she’s asleep.’
Wei Xi didn’t know what Ruan Shaonan had said, but she saw that Ruan was talking on the phone while pacing around the room, then covering the phone up and saying to her, ‘He said that if you don’t answer, he’ll come over right away.’
Wei Xi realised that this man could always corner her. With no choice, she picked up the phone and tried to keep her voice calm, ‘Mr Ruan, you wanted to speak to me?’
‘Weixi, we need to talk.‘ His voice was as clear and cold as the winter wind.
’Mr. Ruan, I think…‘ Weixi hesitated, “We should have already talked.”
’So, this is your decision?‘ His tone of voice sounded very displeased.
’Yes.‘
He was smiling again, as if careless, but Weixi knew that this was a precursor to his anger.
’My little Weixi, you shouldn’t do this.’
Wei Xi’s heart sank to her throat. She was about to say something when she heard a click and a busy signal, and he simply hung up.
‘What did he say?’ Ru Fei asked.
‘He said…’ Wei Xi seemed to still be in shock, ‘I shouldn’t have done that.’
Ru Fei frowned, ‘What do you mean? A threat? Or a request?’
Wei Xi handed her the phone back and gave a wry smile, ‘It sounded like a request, but the tone… was more like a threat.’
‘Damn it!’ Ru Fei stood up suddenly, rubbing his hands together, “Let’s just say it’s a threat. What can he not do? Or, what is he afraid of? They’re going to come for us, we can’t just sit here and wait for them to kill us.”
Wei Xi shook her head in despair, “As far as I know, nothing.”
Ru Fei looked at her with pity, and patted his shoulder reassuringly, ’So what can I do for you now?’
Wei Xi felt her head ache like pins and needles. She collapsed onto the bed and said weakly, ‘Collect my body for me…’
Ru Fei pulled her up. ‘Wei Xi, I’ve told you before, don’t play jokes like this on me, it’s not funny.’
Wei Xi looked at Ru Fei’s worried eyes, sighed, and said seriously against her forehead, ‘I’m not joking. Ru Fei, you need to be prepared. I grew up in the Lu family, so I have a feeling. Something big is about to happen, and it may be as fierce as a storm. Whether it’s Ruan Shaonan or the Lu family, they don’t care if I’m innocent or not, or if I have no intention of fighting. If they need to, either side will use me as a scapegoat, without hesitation.’
Chapter 9: A Narrow Escape
Whether it was a joke or not, from that night onwards, Ruoxi felt as if she was on the edge of a tight string, always on the verge of breaking. She went to class and work as usual, and spent time with her friends after work as usual. Her face showed no signs of emotion.
But Ruoxi knew that she was different. She was afraid, a strange kind of fear. This fear is not expressed on her face, cannot be verbalised, and cannot even be vented. Instead, it is carved into her bones and blood, inextricably linked to her, and always by her side.
What is terrifying is that she is completely powerless to struggle. Because a part of her life has been branded by that man. Or rather, that man used a devious method to draw his own mark on a blank page.
This makes Ru Fei feel cruel. It is an invisible violence that strikes at your nerves and makes you bleed unseen, yet you are powerless to cry for help.
On the contrary, Ruan Shaonan seems to be living a life of springtime joy. The person who has always been low-key is unusually frequently seen in the newspapers, always accompanied by different beauties, plump and thin, red and green. He has never looked for Ru Fei either, as if they have returned to the way they were and become strangers from different worlds. It was as if nothing had ever happened, like an unexpected nightmare that vanished at the end of the night.
All the turmoil seemed to have stopped instantly, as if, in an instant, Wei Xi had been forgotten by him in the crowd of people in the streets and alleys.
If she hadn’t thought about it before, she would have thought that this was the man’s way of getting back at her. She really didn’t know if he had succeeded or failed.
Wei Xi didn’t say anything about his scandals, and she couldn’t tell if she was disappointed or happy. Sometimes, she would just stare at him on TV, as if she had lost something.
Seeing her like this, Ruixi herself didn’t know whether she should be happy for her or sad.
She knew what that man meant to Ruixi: her entire childhood, adolescence, and even the most beautiful and most desperate aspirations of her entire life.
‘The Peerless Beauty’ was just as decadent as it had always been. Life and death, separation and reunion, weddings and funerals – those are all things that happen outside. No matter how the outside world changes, here, everything goes on as usual.
Ruan Shaonan never visited again. He rarely went to such places for entertainment anyway. Ling Luochuan was still a regular, but he no longer asked Ruifei to accompany him. However, Ruifei, who was responsible for serving drinks in the VIP room, inevitably had to cross paths with this man.
He was never a gentleman, let alone a good man. This person seemed to always live outside the rules of morality, never hiding his interest in what he was interested in. A pair of beautiful tan eyes, when looking at Wei Xi, were always so unrestrained and rude. But all along, perhaps out of respect for Ruan Shaonan, he hadn’t done anything too excessive.
But now…
Wei Xi was half kneeling on the carpet, taking the champagne out of the ice bucket, skillfully opening it with the corkscrew, and pouring it into the glasses. Ling Luochuan was sitting on the sofa, looking at her with a half smile.
The private room was very lively. Several hostesses and the guests Ling Luochuan had brought were singing karaoke. A few people were drunk and singing out of key.
They were used to this kind of noise and didn’t find it unpleasant after listening to it for a long time, but this ability really could not be cultivated in one day.
‘Hey, I’m tired of this song, let’s change it,’ someone said.
Songs are selected by computer here, and the hostesses are all familiar with it. Wei Xi was busy adding ice to everyone’s wine glasses. When she looked up, the music was still playing, but everyone had already left.
Except for one person.
This situation clearly meant that the place was being cleared out, and Wei Xi felt a little nervous, subconsciously looking at the door to the private room.
Ling Luochuan, however, smiled, leaning lazily on the sofa and looking at her, ‘What are you afraid of? I don’t eat people.’
He, Ling Luochuan, doesn’t eat people, but what he did was even more terrifying than eating people. Thinking back to what happened that night, Wei Xi still feels a little scared.
Seeing Wei Xi’s ready-for-anything look, Ling Luochuan’s smile at the corner of his mouth became even more obvious, ‘Don’t be so nervous, I didn’t tell them to do this. It’s just that everyone saw me staring at you the whole time, so they took matters into their own hands. Don’t worry, you’re Shao Nan’s woman. I’m friends with him, and we’re also business partners. I won’t touch his woman.‘
Hearing Ruan Shao Nan’s name suddenly, Wei Xi felt a little confused pain. She looked up at Ling Luochuan with an expressionless face, “Mr. Ling, the wine is poured. If you’re fine, I’ll go out.”
’Wait!’ Ling Luochuan grabbed her, and without controlling the strength, Wei Xi fell onto the sofa.
‘What are you doing?‘ Wei Xi looked at the unpredictable face in front of her with some nervousness.
’Don’t be in such a hurry to leave, I want to talk to you…’ He suddenly leaned in her ear, as if he really wanted to tell her something. Whether on purpose or not, his lips brushed her earlobe, and his warm breath blew on her neck. So, the memory of that night’s frenzy was suddenly brought out by him without any defence.
Wei Xi subconsciously turned her face away, and her ears suddenly turned red.
Ling Luochuan paused for a moment, grabbed her chin, and stared at her with sharp eyes like a scalpel for a long time, then smiled knowingly, ‘You’re different from last time, heh… I really didn’t expect it. Shao Nan has always been cautious with women, and this time he really moved fast. I just don’t understand one thing: What happened between you two? How did you…get dumped so quickly?’
Did this man come here today just to make fun of her? Then he is a bit boring.
Wei Xi pushed his hand away with some disgust, but this person happened to have some evil interests. The more others dislike it, the more he wants to tease.
With a little force, his hand pinned Wei Xi’s head and neck to the backrest of the sofa. Having had this experience for the first time, Wei Xi dared not move.
The man smiled slightly, as if he was very satisfied, and bit his lower lip. ‘In fact, I really like you. As long as you are his woman, I will not touch you. But if you two are going your separate ways, then why not consider me? You see, I have everything he has, and I can give you what he can. Besides, he is a man who only thinks about making money every day, and he is not romantic at all. I have never had much patience with women, but I make an exception for you. Maybe…’ He rubbed his thumb over Weixi’s lips and said excitedly, “can we have a little romance first to cultivate our feelings?”
Weixi found that she had reached the point of “enough is enough” with this boring and domineering playboy.
‘Mr. Ling, since you already know my current situation, please spare me and don’t make fun of me as a jilted wife. And…‘ Wei Xi smiled, “I may not have much experience, but I understand the principle of ”a rabbit doesn’t eat grass near its nest’.”
Ling Luochuan looked at her in surprise for a moment, then laughed, his eyebrows and eyes all relaxed, looking very happy.
With his thumb on her chin and her neck in his hands, she was forced to look up at him, her heart pounding. This man was just like Ruan Shaonan, smiling when he was happy and when he wasn’t happy, he still smiled. He had an inscrutable face, like a nobleman’s.
The next second, he pulled her hair and sneered, ‘Sharp tongue, watch out, I’ll pull out all your teeth sooner or later.’
Wei Xi’s scalp was numb with pain. She really wanted to know if anyone would come to her rescue before she was completely destroyed by this devil.
‘I’m not Shao Nan, I don’t have that kind of good manners. Remember, next time don’t show your disgust so obviously. A woman like this will make a man lose all appetite.’ Then unexpectedly, he opened his snow-white teeth and bit her lips, punishing her. After biting one side, he moved on to the other.
He must be crazy! Out and out crazy! While struggling, Wei Xi cursed him in her heart, but she could never match his strength. The man seemed to be getting more and more addicted to this game. His hand had already explored her collar, and he pulled strongly, revealing the shoulder straps of her bra. He smiled as he looked down, and with interest, he bit it with his teeth, kissing her white jade-like skin, very hard, maliciously leaving a series of red and purple marks.
‘Ling Luochuan, let go!‘ Wei Xi was completely desperate and shouted at him, not even caring about the fear.
Just then, there was a sudden piercing ring outside, a fire alarm! Countless feet were running around outside, and the “ Peerless Beauty” immediately became a pandemonium, in a complete mess.
’Mr. Ling…’ The bodyguard knocked on the door outside.
Ling Luochuan let go of her hand, looked at Wei Xi with satisfaction, who was dazed and frightened, kissed her forehead comfortingly, straightened his clothes, and did not forget to straighten the collar of her shirt that he had messed up. He then walked out contentedly.
Wei Xi stayed motionless on the sofa for a second, let out a heavy sigh, and suddenly remembered that it was a fire alarm. The nightclub was full of flammable and explosive products, and if there was a fire, it would be no joke.
She quickly ran out of the private room, but there were only people running around like ants in the corridor, and she didn’t smell any smoke.
Then, she heard Wei Chengbao raging not far away, ‘Damn it! Who the hell is playing with the alarm for no reason?’
Chapter 10: You think I’m pregnant
“Special news report: Lu Zehui, the eldest son of the chairman of the Taihuang Group, was arrested by the public security authorities last night on suspicion of drugging and raping an underage girl. The victim is still in a coma after being forced to take a large amount of illegal drugs. According to the hospital, her condition is very dangerous. Although the case is still under further investigation, Lu Zehui is a senior executive of the group, and his involvement in this case will have a considerable adverse impact on the Taihuang Group. Some stock market analysts believe that the share price of Taihuang will plummet today. This will undoubtedly add to the woes of Taihuang, which is already being pursued by Yitian…”
When the morning news reported this piece of news, Weixi and Rufei were having breakfast at the snack bar downstairs.
Rufei was first taken aback, then shook his head and said to Weixi beside him, ’I finally understand now what is meant by instant karma. Your brother got what was coming to him, but the girl is pitiful. I wonder if she can be saved?’
‘She can’t be saved…‘ Wei Xi took a sip of soy milk and whispered.
Wei Xi’s certainty surprised Ru Fei a little. “Why?”
’There is no instant karma in this world, only pre-set traps. If someone is drugged and raped, they will get three to seven years at most. But if the rape results in the death of the other person, it is a serious crime. The person who set this trap up didn’t want to teach him a lesson, they wanted to ruin him. If the girl survives, what’s the point of the trap?’
She suddenly seemed to have understood something and asked, ‘Ruan Shaonan, do you suspect him?’
Weixi shook her head, ‘I’m not suspicious, I’m almost certain. Lu Zexi is indeed an animal, but he’s not an idiot. He has the means and the brains to get others into serious trouble when he was a child, and he was able to keep himself out of it. He should have become even more cunning when he grew up, so how did he get caught? Even if he was careless for a moment, the Lu family has been calling the shots for so many years and has a wide range of connections, so how could they let the news get out so quickly?”
Ruan Shaonan snorted, ’Ruan Shaonan, someone like your brother could fall into his hands, he really has skills.’
‘Perhaps he wasn’t the only one who did it.”
Ru Fei thought for three seconds and blurted out, “Ling Luochuan?”
Wei Xi nodded, “They are partners, which means they share the same interests. Right now, the share price of Taihuang has plummeted and the Lu family’s reputation is in tatters. I’m afraid they’re celebrating at home with champagne.”
Ru Fei shook his head, ’These two people are really… But they’re also ruthless. How old is that little girl? She’s just cannon fodder, isn’t she?’
‘The business world is a bloodbath without the smoke and gunfire, with corpses everywhere and traps at every turn. As the saying goes, ‘One general’s success is built on the bones of a thousand corpses…’’ Wei Xi turned her face and looked at the towering Yitian Building in the distance. “You see, those resplendent skyscrapers, with their shiny exteriors, are actually built on piles of human bones.”
Ru Fei was utterly incredulous and let out a long sigh. ’My God, I really can’t imagine what kind of people these are.’
Wei Xi smiled a little, then said seriously, ‘It’s people like you and me that you definitely can’t mess with.’
Having said that, she suddenly felt a sharp pain in her abdomen.
‘What’s wrong? You look so pale,’ Ru Fei noticed that something was wrong with her and asked worriedly, ‘I saw you in the toilet for most of the morning, are you okay?’
‘I’m fine…’ Wei Xi’s face turned pale and she broke out in a cold sweat, ‘I felt a bit sick this morning, maybe I ate something wrong.’
‘Do you want me to take you to the hospital?”
Wei Xi waved her hand, “No need, I have a class in the morning. If I’m still not feeling well after class, I’ll go myself. Don’t worry, I can hold on.”
Today’s class seemed particularly long, and Wei Xi still felt very uncomfortable, so she stayed until the end of class. As she packed her things and was about to leave with her sketchpad on her back, Zhou Xiaofan came over and patted her on the shoulder, ’Wei Xi, the department head wants to see you.’
‘What is it?‘
’I think it might be about your scholarship. Go and see what it is about.‘
When Weixi came out of the dean’s office, she still felt dizzy. Perhaps she really needed to see a doctor. As she reached the door, she was still trying to work out which bus route would take her to the hospital quickly and cheaply.
’Weixi!’ Someone was calling her.
Wei Xi turned around and saw a bejewelled beauty in the sunlight, standing next to a Maserati, waving at her.
Wei Xi smiled to herself, thinking about how her 21 years of life had been so quiet and peaceful, and suddenly it had become so busy and crowded. People from all walks of life appeared one after the other, one after the other, and it was really a lot of fun.
‘Long time no see, can we talk?’
Could she say no?
The place for the conversation is an outdoor café. Wai-hei looks at the woman in front of her, dressed in designer clothes and sparkling with jewellery. There is no doubt: she is still as beautiful as ever.
‘Wai-hei, how long has it been since I last saw you? How have you been?’ The beautiful woman smiles without showing her teeth, her bearing impeccable.
Wai-hei nods, ‘I’m fine.’
‘Have you been to pay your respects to your mother recently?’
‘Just yesterday.’ Wai-hei takes a sip of her bitter coffee.
The beauty was a little surprised. ‘So you already know?’
‘Yes, I know. Her ashes are missing, and the cemetery manager told me. I have already asked them to report it to the police, and I am still waiting for the results.’ Wei Xi put down the cup and looked at her. ‘You didn’t come here today to ask me about the weather. I still have things to do, so let’s get straight to the point.’
‘Haha, you’re just like you were when we were kids. I won’t beat around the bush. You’ve heard about Big Brother, and we know that Ruan Shaonan has been looking for you and we know about your relationship. The Lu family needs your help now, and of course, Father said that you won’t be doing it for free. I think I’ve made myself clear, haven’t I?”
Wei Xi nodded, “Very clear. But I still don’t understand, what do you want from me?”
The corners of the beauty’s mouth sank, and she looked a little upset, ’You’re playing with me, aren’t you? Ruan Shaonan is doing this to your brother, he is basically taking revenge for you. The Lu family is now only waiting for you to whisper in his ear to say a few words for your brother, telling him not to go too far, and that you will not be treated unfairly after this is done. And you still refuse?”
Wei Xi couldn’t help but laugh, ’So you all think that Lu Zexi’s prison sentence was because I whispered in his ear? This is too much credit for me. What talents and abilities do I have that I can sway Ruan Shaonan’s thoughts? Have you forgotten that my surname is also Lu? Theoretically, I am also his enemy.‘
’Weixi, you are not like us. Ruan Shaonan used to love you the most. Your word is worth ten others. Even if you didn’t instigate this matter, you can’t just stand by and do nothing!’ Mei’er suddenly took Weixi’s hand as if about to burst into tears, ’Just help your sister, Weixi. After all, we are family.’
‘Family?’ Wei Xi felt a little ridiculous. “Back then, those two brutes dragged me into the basement…” She paused and looked straight at her so-called sister. “When they stripped me naked and humiliated me, sister, who was standing nearby gloating and not helping?”
It was like being slapped in the face. Mei Ren immediately blushed and smiled weakly. ’Wei Xi, I was confused at the time. But we were all young and didn’t understand. Besides, your brothers were only joking with you, and you didn’t end up badly hurt, did you?‘
’Joking?’ Wei Xi smiled, “You’re right, for people like you who have been spoiled since childhood and are used to having your own way, hurting others is as easy as drinking cold water. Besides, we weren’t even born from the same mother.”
Wei Xi withdrew her hand and took out her wallet from her backpack while saying, ’I absolutely believe that you really have no other way out, otherwise you wouldn’t have come to me for help. But you really have come to the wrong person. I feel for you and what you’ve been through, but there’s nothing I can do. But I can promise you one thing…”
Wei Xi looked her in the eye and smiled, ’It’s Ruan Shaonan. He loves to joke around. He also loves to play games. The Lu family is now a fun playground for him, full of deadly temptations. Before he completely ruins the Lu family, you will be his little toys for entertainment. But after he’s finished playing, you won’t be left unscathed. He’ll bring you down and leave you penniless! Because the Lu family owes him.‘
Wei-xi finished speaking, placed the money for a cup of coffee on the table, picked up her backpack, and got up to leave. She had a pile of her own troubles to deal with, and had no time to worry about whether the beauty across the street was already turning pale.
’Lu Wei-xi, don’t gloat. You think you can stay out of this? Don’t forget, you also have the surname Lu. When he’s finished with us, you’ll be the last one. I’ll just wait and see what happens to you!‘
Weixi stopped in her tracks and looked back at the face of despair and anger. There was no anger, only calm. Because she knew the kind of deep-rooted, ever-present fear that this woman was experiencing, just as she had experienced it before and was experiencing it now.
’I never thought that I could stay out of it. But I’m really surprised that you’re so scared now. Do you remember what you said when you locked me in that basement with no light when we were kids? You said that you were closing the door on the dog. So what are you now? A turtle in a jar? When you did evil, did you ever think about what comes around?
Wei Xi didn’t look at her again, but she could tell from the sound of her voice that her beautiful sister was crying desperately behind her, and that fear had made her lose sight of her decency and dignity.
It turns out that fear alone can drive a person to such a state.
Wei Xi knew that she was not gloating, because she was also in the midst of disaster.
One wrong step and you are doomed!
“Wei Xi, even if you don’t help us, even if my eldest brother, second brother, father, and all of us deserve to die, what about our youngest sister, You Xi? Are you going to ignore her too?’
Weixi’s back stiffened, but she didn’t turn around and kept walking.
The pain in her lower abdomen was still severe. Hospital…
Weixi couldn’t wait for the bus, so she flagged down a taxi. When she got in, she saw her face in the rearview mirror, white as snow.
When Weixi came out of the obstetrics and gynaecology department, she called Ruifei to ask if she could come pick her up. But the line was busy, so she had to wait in the waiting area.
It so happened that the TV in the waiting area was broadcasting the awards ceremony for the year’s most outstanding bankers. This is the industry’s highest honour, and the winners are often leading figures in the financial world.
Wei Xi was wondering who would win this year. As a result, a familiar figure on TV, accompanied by thunderous applause and flashing magnesium lights, appeared in her line of sight.
Wei Xi was in a daze, staring at the television. All the sounds suddenly became so distant, as if they came from another world.
She was sitting alone in the bustling hospital, but it was as if she were on a deserted island. Everything around her instantly grew dark, and only he, with his gentle smile and handsome features, was as usual, expressionless. Even his smile only slightly raised the corners of his lips, noble as an emperor, with a sense of control over everything.
She could no longer remember the last time she saw his face. That tired and aching morning, when she woke up, he was still fast asleep, his breath so close to her ear, so close yet so far away…
But she could still remember his fingers, the warm lines of his lips, his ragged breath, his scorching intensity. She could remember all the hidden sorrow of that night so clearly. She could not forget, and she would not forget.
Throughout the night, whenever she tried to escape, he forced her to look into his eyes. He wanted her to witness every minute of his possession of her. It was he who cunningly and coldly wanted her to remember it all, so she would never forget it for the rest of her life.
Another sharp pain. Wei Xi, like a pear tree battered by heavy rain, slowly withered and finally curled up in a ball.
Just then, there was a sudden commotion at the awards ceremony.
Ruan Shaonan was on stage giving his acceptance speech when Wang Dongyang suddenly walked up and whispered something in his ear. However, after listening, his face suddenly changed, and he suddenly said ‘I’m sorry’ into the microphone, without giving an explanation, and then hurriedly left with Wang Dongyang.
The whole audience was in an uproar!
This was a live broadcast, watched by thousands of viewers, and he just left like that? Without giving an explanation?
Everyone at the scene looked at each other, and the host stood on the stage at a loss. Even Weixi, who was sitting in the hospital, was so scared by the sudden turn of events that he forgot about the pain.
What was going on?
The host was well-trained and quickly recovered, saying a few nice words to smooth things over and continue with the next event. But obviously, the atmosphere in the venue was no longer as lively as before. Reporters and guests were discussing the matter, and many media had even left the room.
Wei Xi was baffled. He felt that this was extremely strange. He had never been so inconsiderate before. What had happened?
Just as he was thinking, there was another commotion in the hospital lobby. A lot of people gathered at the entrance, seemingly looking at something. Then, a young nurse whispered in shock, ‘Ruan Shaonan!’
You’ve got to be kidding me, right?
Wei Xi turned around in shock, staring wide-eyed at the man in front of her, and then at the TV. She couldn’t believe it. The man who had just been on TV had suddenly jumped over to her like a gust of wind.
Ruan Shaonan grabbed Wei Xi’s hand. He was clearly in a hurry, as could be seen by the beads of sweat on his forehead, and his expression was very anxious. ‘Wei Xi, listen to me, you can’t do this,’
Wei Xi just stared at him blankly, still in shock. The man thought she was being dismissive, and his tone became even more severe, ‘Even if an adult has made a mistake, a child is innocent!’
‘A child?’ Wei Xi suddenly understood, ‘You think I’m pregnant?’
The man was very confused, ‘I thought you came here to have an abortion…isn’t that right?’
Wei Xi looked at him, unable to laugh or cry, ‘Mr. Ruan, going to the gynecologist doesn’t necessarily mean to have an abortion, it could be for other reasons.’
‘Other things?’ Ruan Shaonan was at a loss.
Wei Xi waved the medicine in her hand, “For example, dysmenorrhea…”
Ruan Shaonan then understood, let out a heavy sigh, and then burst out laughing, looking at Wei Xi and smiling. He probably felt that this was a really embarrassing situation.
Wei Xi was really dumbfounded. From the time they met until now, he had always seemed like a living specimen to her, flawless and impeccable. She had never seen him change so many expressions in such a short period of time.
‘Mr. Ruan…’ His assistant Wang Dongyang followed up, reminding him, ‘A reporter is following us. Let’s go out the back door.’
Ruan Shaonan did not move, but just tightly gripped Wei Xi’s arm, as if he was thinking about something.
Wei Xi suddenly understood his intention. She grabbed his hand and looked at him almost pleadingly, ‘No…’
However, this man seemed to have made up his mind. He did not even move, but just gripped Wei Xi’s hand even more firmly, as if he was afraid she would run away.
Wei Xi was so anxious that tears almost fell from her eyes.
In the end, Wang Dongyang knew how to turn things around. ‘Mr. Ruan, if you want to announce your relationship with Miss Lu, you can do it at another time. In a place like this, in this situation, the reporters will definitely write nonsense. Besides, Miss Lu is still a student, I’m afraid it wouldn’t be good for her…’
Ruan Shaonan looked at Wei Xi again before he relented, ‘Let’s go then.’
After getting into the car, Wei Xi let out a sigh of relief. Perhaps it was because of the tension, her pale face had a hint of redness.
Seeing her relaxed expression, Ruan Shaonan couldn’t help sneering, ‘Are you that happy? Not having to tangle with me in front of the media makes you so happy?’
Wei Xi was taken aback by what he said and whispered in self-defense, ‘That’s not what I meant…’
But Ruan Shaonan didn’t seem to want to hear her explanation, turning his face to the side and leaving her with a cold, hard profile.
Wei Xi sighed silently. This man’s heart is really unpredictable. In just a minute, he’s already changed his face.
‘Mr. Ruan, where to?’ the driver asked.
Ruan Shaonan thought for a moment, looked at Wei Xi, and asked very gentlemanly, ‘I’m hungry. Will you go eat with me?’
Wei Xi nodded, ‘Yes.’ She thought for a moment, and then added, ‘Actually, you don’t need to be so polite.’
Ruan Shaonan didn’t say anything else, and the temperature in the car suddenly dropped to freezing point. The driver, understandingly, turned on the music to ease the atmosphere.
The music was soft and gentle, and it made people feel relaxed. Art is connected to art, and people who like art almost never don’t like music.
Wei Xi felt a little happy. She thought about the tape recorder she had bought recently. Frankly speaking, no matter how good the music is, it will sound like cotton being pounded if played through those cheap speakers.
So it’s good to have money, even the music sounds better.
She suddenly remembered something, so she turned her face and asked the man beside her, ‘How did you know I was in the hospital? Did you send someone to follow me?’
Ruan Shaonan’s mouth sank, and he simply closed his eyes to rest, as if he was not willing to deal with her, ‘I would rather interpret it as protection.’
‘In fact, you don’t need to be so nervous. If I really have a child, I will tell you,’ Wei Xi said.
‘Really?’ Ruan Shaonan turned his face to look at her.
Wei Xi smiled, “No. As you expected, I will quietly get an abortion.”
The man sneered, turned her chin, and his hot breath could burn people’s nerves. Between his lips and teeth, he said, ’Don’t even think about it.’
Chapter 11: A father’s murder is unforgivable
The dinner was a delicious Huaiyang meal, and Weixi was a little moved that he remembered. Weixi’s mother was from Yangzhou, and her specialty in life was Huaiyang cuisine.
Yangzhou is a place of gentle hills and soft water, with outstanding people and a fertile land. The cuisine is also very particular, exuding a sense of elegance and refinement.
Pingqiao tofu, stir-fried mushrooms with vegetables, crispy eel salad, tomato fillets, as well as the fragrant and tender crab meat and minced pork meatballs in a clear broth, and Huai’an soup dumplings with a thin crust and fresh filling…
When Weixi saw all these delicacies, she almost burst into tears. Her mother had often cooked these dishes for her before, but after so many years, she had almost forgotten their taste and this warm and down-to-earth feeling. He had actually remembered them, and remembered them so clearly.
The restaurant was tastefully decorated, with private rooms set on quaint water pavilions. Below, there was a babbling brook. Looking out the window of the private room, one could see the quaint bridge and wooden waterwheel in the courtyard, as if it were a real misty and rainy Jiangnan.
Wei Xi was in a daze, as if she had returned to those early years of her life. Every time she was bullied, she would sit alone on the swing in the Lu family mansion, like a wounded animal, licking her wounds. No one cared. She even wondered if, one day, if she were killed by those so-called older brothers and sisters, would anyone even know?
Then one day, he appeared, like a ray of warm sunshine, unexpectedly and unpredictably lighting up her entire life.
If she had to say what miracle there was in that desolate world, it would be him, who had appeared at that time and place, in her thorny life.
Ruan Shaonan’s mood seemed to have improved again. He ordered a jar of aged daughter red, a treasure from the cellar that had been aged for 18 years. As soon as he opened the lid, he smelled the rich aroma of the wine.
Wei Xi had asthma, so even though the wine was soft and fragrant, she didn’t dare drink too much of it. She just took small sips with the side dishes.
The sound of a puppy barking faintly came from the courtyard. Wai-hei looked outside in surprise. How could there be a dog here?
But there really was. She saw a little girl holding a fluffy Akita dog and having fun with it. The puppy was so well-behaved and cute, with round eyes and an innocent expression.
Nguyen Sao Nam couldn’t help smiling when he saw this. ‘I remember the first time I saw you, you were also holding a puppy. But that puppy was very dirty, ugly and injured. It looked like you had picked it up, didn’t you? You were crying and begging me to help save it. I remember, you called it ‘Hachi’. You kept hugging it and kept saying, ‘Hachi can’t die, Hachi can’t die’. You were crying pitifully, which made me feel really confused.”
Thinking back on the past, Wei Xi also laughed, ’That’s because at that time, I happened to watch a Japanese movie called Hachi: A Dog’s Tale. The Hachi in the movie was very good to its owner, and every day it would go to the station to wait for its owner to come home from work. Until one day, its owner died while at work, but it was still there waiting for him to come back. At the same time, in the same place, in the same position, it waited for ten whole years, until it died of old age…’ Wei Xi’s eyes misted over a little, and she smiled again, ’This story taught me what love and loyalty are. So at that time, I really hoped that I would have a dog just like Hachi.’
‘I remember, I helped you take the dog to the vet at the time, and it survived. Later, I saw you playing fetch with it in the yard. It was ugly, but very agile.‘
’Yes, Hachi was really good. But then…’ Wei-xi pursed her dry lips, her voice breaking and trembling, ’not long after you left… one day, my brothers and sisters, on a whim, found a pair of scissors and cut my hair. Hachi rushed over to save me, and it bit my sister’s dress. Then, they…they put a rope around its neck and hung it from a tree. Just like that…it hung there…it hung there…”
Ruan Shaonan raised an eyebrow and didn’t say anything else. After a while, he suddenly remembered something and asked her, ’I heard that the movie was remade in the US. If you like, I’ll take you to see it?’
Wei Xi smiled, her eyes already brimming with tears, but she tried hard to hold back, so hard that her lips trembled and her throat ached. ‘I…don’t want to watch it again. After that, for a long time, every night, I…heard Hachi barking, and I was afraid to think about it…I couldn’t bear it…’
In the end, she couldn’t hold back, and tears fell, one after the other, smashing against the rim of the cup and scattering in countless drops. Every word was so difficult, every word was filled with a cold, bloody air. At this moment, what is memory? Is it hell? Is it an abyss? Or is it a cage made of fear and flesh?
In her life, happiness was always so short-lived, and the pain of being coerced never stopped. For others, pain is only an occasional experience, but for her, it is the real thing.
Ruan Shaonan has always been very quiet. He lit a cigarette and, in the haze of smoke, quietly looked at her. He just looked at her, at her slightly trembling eyelashes, at the way she bit by bit put away her tears and sadness, at her delicate face in the light of the lanterns, and at the small, faintly visible red birthmark between her brows. He just looked, without asking questions, without interfering, without even offering comfort.
As the lanterns were lit for the night, red lanterns were lit in the courtyard, like night-floating peonies, drifting in the unknowable darkness. The distant sound of the erhu, cold as water, came from afar, like a sad legend, long and bitter, like a lament.
After dinner, Wei Xi was going to go to work, and Ruan Shaonan insisted on seeing her off himself. When she got into the car, Wei Xi noticed that he was driving a silver-grey Pagani today.
‘You’ve changed to a sports car?’ Wei Xi was somewhat curious.
‘You don’t like it?‘ Ruan Shaonan turned to look at her.
’Ah, no,’ Wei Xi hastily denied, where was she to dislike it? “In fact, I always felt that the Bugatti was too ostentatious, not quite your usual style.”
Ruan Shaonan smiled, “I felt the same way, so I gave it to Luochuan.”
Wei Xi was truly taken aback, a car worth tens of millions, just given away like that? What were these people thinking?
Seeing Wei Xi’s puzzled expression, Ruan Shaonan explained, ‘In return, he transferred a piece of land in his hands to me at a bargain price. If you do the math, I made a small profit.’
Wei Xi then understood. Looking at him, she said, ‘In fact, you knew he liked it, so you deliberately bought it first, just to rip him off later?’
The man raised the corner of his lips and said, ‘What do you think?’
Guess? As the saying goes, all businessmen are unscrupulous, and the pursuit of profit is eternal in the business world. She could never guess what was going on in the minds of people like him.
Seeing that she was silent, Ruan Shaonan said, ‘It’s not really that big a deal. I bought that car because I wanted to give myself a gift for all the hard work I’d put in. But I didn’t really like it, and by chance, Luo Chuan had a thing for that limited edition sports car, so I just went along with it.’
Giving himself a gift? How lonely he must be. Wei Xi felt a little sorry for him.
‘You and Ling Luochuan are very close?‘ Wei Xi admitted that she was a bit nosy. It was just that the men around her were always cold as ice, and when she mentioned Ling Luochuan, there was a slight smile at the corner of her mouth, which was really rare in him.
’We’re kind of friends through hard times. We met in the United States. At the time, he ran away from home and was drifting around by himself when he was besieged by a group of thugs. I saw that we were both Chinese, so I helped him out. Don’t look at him like a young master, but he’s a professional fighter.’
Wei Xi was completely overwhelmed. She looked at Ruan Shaonan, who was driving, and stuttered, ‘You mean, you and he… in the United States… fought with gangsters? Back to back? Just like in Hong Kong action movies?’
Ruan Shaonan nodded and asked quite seriously, ‘Is that strange?’
My god! Not only is it strange, it’s downright unbelievable. No wonder Ling Luochuan is so skilled at holding people hostage, it turns out he’s a professional.
But Ruan Shaonan, such an elegant and noble person…
She suddenly remembered that she had heard before that the Ruan family had been Vietnamese Chinese for generations, and it was only in his father’s generation that they returned to the mainland. His grandfather had participated in the Vietnam War and was a war hero, ambushing many American soldiers in the Vietnamese jungle.
How should I put it? A tiger grandfather, a dog-like grandson?
‘If he’s so powerful, why does he always have bodyguards with him? Is he afraid of being kidnapped?’
Ruan Shaonan laughed, ‘No one would dare kidnap him.’
Wei Xi was even more puzzled, ‘Then who would dare kidnap him?’
Ruan Shaonan thought for a moment, ‘Like spies, terrorists, and so on…’
“Huh?’
‘His father…‘ Ruan Shaonan hesitated for a moment, “is a leading figure, a very high-ranking one, you understand?”
Wei Xi finally understood, let out an “oh” and said, “So it’s a ”princeling’, no wonder…”
Ruan Shaonan looked at her and said, ’I think you’ve got it wrong. In fact, his relationship with his father has always been very tense, almost to the point of not speaking, so his father has never really cared for him and has left him to fend for himself. But with his status, everyone is wary of him. He has an older brother who works in the Ministry of Security and an older sister who is a translator in the Ministry of Foreign Affairs. Among his children, he is the only one who is in business, and he is considered an outsider in the family. His bodyguards are hired by his brother to protect his safety only, and they will not take action lightly. The person who beat you that day was not brought by him.”
Wei Xi nodded. No wonder when she encountered his bodyguards on these occasions, she felt that they were very polite and indeed quite different.
‘That kid is a bit of a fool, but he doesn’t usually go too far. He was drunk that day, and your friend’s temper is really… I didn’t recognise you at the time, otherwise I wouldn’t have let him get away with it.”
Wei Xi mused to herself, guessing that Ruan Shaonan didn’t know that Ling Luochuan had come over to flirt with her. He didn’t know, and she didn’t want to tell him. After all, what kind of relationship did she have with him?
She smiled, ‘Actually, you don’t need to explain to me. Whether he did it on purpose or not, it makes no difference to us, because the result is the same. In a place like that, it’s our job to make you happy. If you’re not happy, we naturally have to bear the consequences. We’re not qualified, nor do we have the ability, to argue with you about right and wrong.’
Ruan Shaonan’s mouth twitched, and Weixi’s heart sank.
Oh, he’s angry again. It seems she really does make him angry easily. But she remembered that he used to be very patient and had never said a harsh word to her. Now, for some reason, she seemed to be particularly disliked by him. And he always looked so cold, so she was even more afraid of him. Even when he smiled, she felt a little afraid, as if she were walking on thin ice.
“Then let me explain one last thing. The 120,000 yuan was not from me, it was Wei Chengbao being clever.’
Wei Xi nodded carefully, ‘I understand.’
‘What do you understand!’ Ruan Shaonan suddenly yelled out in a harsh voice, followed by a sharp brake.
Wei Xi was startled by him, and the atmosphere that had just been harmonious immediately ‘deteriorated’.
‘Get out of the car!’ he ordered, and got out first.
Wei Xi was stunned for three seconds, and then followed.
However, it was not the entrance to ‘Jue Se’ outside, and it wasn’t even in the city, it was by the sea!
Looking at the rough sea, Wei Xi was dumbfounded. He had been so caught up in talking to him that he hadn’t noticed it before. What did he want to bring her here for? Could it be that he wanted to sink her body into the sea to vent his hatred?
The answer would soon be revealed.
Ruan Shaonan confined her between the car and his body, kissing her with great force. It was as if this man had abstained for too long, and even the kissing was painful.
The phone rang, probably from Ruifei. With her free hand, Wei Xi subconsciously reached into her pocket, but she didn’t expect that he would notice such a small action, and he couldn’t even tolerate this.
He almost savagely took the thing that kept ringing out of her pocket and casually threw it against a rock, smashing it to pieces!
He really went crazy! Wei Xi thought of that crazy night, and a horrible feeling immediately spread throughout her body. She was a little afraid and dared not disobey him at this time, so she just followed him softly. His breath was hot and chaotic, as if he could never be satisfied, just asking for more and more.
‘Weixi, Weixi…’ He kissed her for a long time, patiently, as if he were comforting her. His long, slender fingers deftly undid her buttons, and his beautiful lips burned into the skin of her neck and shoulders.
Wei Xi suddenly flinched and put her hands against his chest. ‘Not today…’
‘Shh, I know, I know, don’t be afraid…’ He breathed heavily against her forehead, whispering, his voice hoarse. His dark eyes were covered in a thin layer of moisture, and the red pupils of his eyes looked like those of a drunkard in the moonlight, but he was still able to control himself.
He picked her up and sat her in the car, burying his face in her neck. Only then did she realise that his face was incredibly hot. She was even more afraid to move, and let him hold her as if she were a huge teddy bear.
But he still didn’t feel satisfied, so he pulled her arms around his neck, and after a moment’s thought, pressed his face against her chest, as if listening to her heartbeat.
In this position, it was as if – she was hugging him.
The night wind was blowing, the waves crashing, the moon was bright and the stars were numerous.
Alas…someone sighed to the stars in the sky, what a beautiful night!
This kind of embrace is really romantic, like the protagonists in a romantic movie; this kind of embrace is really warm, like the deep comfort of one heart to another; this kind of embrace is really sweet—it just shouldn’t be between the two of them.
The wind by the sea was very hard, and Wei Xi was only wearing a peach-coloured knitted cardigan on top, and after a while, she really shivered with cold.
Ruan Runan, however, had no intention of leaving. He just tightened his hold on her hand and whispered into her ear as his cheek rested against her chest: ‘Weixi, you scare me.’
Weixi didn’t say anything, but after a while she gave a faint smile and looked down at the man in her arms. ‘Why would you be scared? Don’t you have everything under control? I just found out today that the special scholarship at our school was funded by your Yitian Group. You let people keep it from me, and you know how important that is to me. And my mother’s ashes were dug up. I guess you know where they are, don’t you?”
After saying this, Wei Xi gave a bitter smile, ’Oh yes, there’s also Ruifei. Last time you threw water, what are you going to throw next time? Sulfuric acid? You know how deep our relationship is, as long as nothing happens to her, I will agree to anything you want. You see, all my weak points are in your hands, so what are you afraid of?’
These words were like a bucket of cold water poured over his head. He looked up and laughed softly again. ‘Are you blaming me? I told you not to leave me, did you listen? At first light, you were gone, without even saying goodbye. Do you know what that feels like? That feeling of thinking you have the whole world, and then losing it all in an instant. That fear, that anxiety, that feeling of being utterly alone and torn apart… You wouldn’t understand.’
Was he just accusing her of leaving without saying goodbye?
Wei Xi frowned at him, almost eye to eye, ‘So, you just shoot first and ask questions later, even if the prey you’re aiming at is innocent and pitiful and doesn’t even have the ability to resist?’
‘Yes!’ Ruan Shaonan almost gnashed his teeth, ‘I told you, you shouldn’t have done this! You didn’t say a word and just left!’
Wei Xi was silent. After saying what she had said, she really had nothing else to say.
It turned out that they had really been apart for too long, separated by a deep-seated grudge and seven years of time. She was no longer the little girl who had always looked up to him with admiration. And he, too, was very different from the handsome young man with a springtime smile she remembered.
During the years they had not been together, he had long since stopped understanding her world, and there were many things about him that she had no way of knowing.
For example, what had happened to him in the past seven years? Who had he met? And what had happened to the person who had clearly had nothing when he left for the United States? After returning to China, he had unexpectedly acquired the Yitian Group in a flash, and in just one year, he had turned the entire financial world upside down.
Without strong financial support, I’m afraid no one could have done this. And his style was even more sophisticated and high-handed than Lu Zixu’s back then, and his actions were even more cold-blooded. Since his return to China a year ago and his meteoric rise in the financial world, the media have been hot on his trail. However, he has always been tight-lipped about his mysterious past.
Wei Xi knows that he has deliberately buried everything and silenced the media, preventing anyone from mentioning the past. Without saying a word, he has quietly made sure that everyone who knew about that incident back then has been destroyed, leaving nothing behind. The culprit was left until last, and he did not move for a long time. No one knows what he is thinking. He is a natural predator, clever and cunning, and ordinary people like her are not even one-tenth as good, let alone guess what he is thinking.
However, one thing is clear – the hatred for killing one’s father is unspeakable!
When she thinks about this, Wei Xi’s hair almost stands on end.
‘I want to go home. Can I go?’ Wei Xi now just wanted to leave him, even if it was just for a minute.
Ruan Shaonan, on the contrary, hugged her even tighter, sighing, ’Wei Xi, stay with me a little longer. I still have a lot to say to you. I know that ever since we reunited, you have been carrying a lot of grievances in your heart. I want to speak to your heart, but are you also shutting it to me?’
Wei Xi lowered her head and looked at the man who had once given her infinite care but now had given her endless torment. She leaned over his ear, her voice soft and weak, with a slight tremor, as if her feathers were being blown by the wind.
‘If my heart could speak, she would say, she is very afraid; if my heart could speak, she would say, you are a cruel hunter, you make your prey suffer; if my heart could speak, she would say, what you have done has made her unable to bear it; if my heart could speak, she would say, for the sake of the old friendship, please let her go…’
He grabbed her by the nape of the neck and pulled her off the hood. His hands were like cold iron pincers, holding her tightly. He was so strong that her spine creaked.
He looked down at her again, condescendingly, ‘If that’s all you want, then I don’t mind reiterating that you don’t even want it in this life!’
Wei Xi was truly desperate. For the last time, she tried to communicate with him, but it was to no avail.
When his lips came down, Wei Xi almost couldn’t control herself. His cold fingers clasped her chin, and her tears smashed on his jaw one after the other.
He knew she was crying, and the cold tears burned even more than the flames. But he didn’t let go, just lowered his head and whispered in her ear, ‘I know the Luk family has been looking for you…’
Wei Xi’s expression hardened, and she trembled even more. Ruan Shaonan tightened his arm around her again, patting her back soothingly and coaxing her, ‘Don’t be afraid. It seems I underestimated them. I let out so much smoke, but they still found you.’
He let out a light laugh at this, his laughter sounding melodious and playful. ‘But it’s okay. I promise that this kind of thing will never happen again. Weixi, just wait a little longer, give me some more time. Once I’ve dealt with everything, once I’ve told all the damn people to go to hell, once I’ve removed all the obstacles… I’ll make you fall in love with me, I’ll do everything I can to make you fall in love with me. So don’t keep thinking about escaping, and I won’t let you escape either. Just give me some more time, just give me some more time. My little Weixi…’
He bent his head and whispered softly, his beautiful lips with their blood-like sweetness, as he told her of his love with all the calmness in the world, of how he would take her flesh and blood…and put them to death.
He tore off her cardigan and pinned her down on the soft sand, lifting up her skirt and pushing his long fingers inside, into the softest, most secluded place of a woman, the gathering place of all his passion and desire.
Wei Xi’s body tightened, and she looked at him almost pleadingly. He couldn’t do this to her, at a time like this, he would hurt her.
His lips, full of desire, kissed her trembling eyes, and he said in a low, hoarse voice, ‘Don’t be afraid, don’t be afraid, I won’t do anything, let me touch you, hold you.’
Then he used his fingers to tease her corset, pulling it up a little, and as he lowered his head, his white teeth bit into her erect nipples. His breath was hot, his skin burning, and his hands moved with increasing impatience and frenzy.
Wei Xi shivered helplessly, turned her face away, and looked blankly out at the vast sea. The black sea, with its angry waves. But the man on top of her was even more unpredictable than the heavy black night, as if he had made all the stars and clouds instantly fade into a blanket of darkness.
There was no end…
Chapter 12 Love and sex
Chi Mo felt a chill for no reason.
He tilted his face up and looked at the narrow sky above his head, where a dark cloud happened to cover the moon. He leaned back, leaning against the wall, and carelessly lit a cigarette, inhaling slowly.
The person kneeling on the ground was already bloody and bloody, with sticky, dark blood coming out of his mouth in streams. He was covered in blood, and his eyes were bleeding. His head was on the ground, and he was mumbling something in his mouth. It was hard to hear what he was saying, but it sounded like he was begging for mercy.
The man with the baseball bat looked back at Chi Mo, who nodded.
There was a muffled thud, and then everything went quiet.
Chi Mo stubbed out his cigarette and said to the other men, ‘That’s enough, let’s go.’
Someone spat on the man on the ground and cursed, ‘Damn it! You’re a traitor!’
Chi Mo looked at him and kicked him hard in the stomach. The man was caught off guard and fell to his knees with a grimace.
‘He has already paid the price for his actions. You have no right to insult him.’
The man’s face was almost distorted with pain as he gritted his teeth and said, ‘I was wrong, Brother Mo.’
An uncontrollable feeling of vomiting welled up, and Chi Mo suddenly felt disgusted with all this filth.
He spoke to Wei Chengbao on the phone, briefly explaining what had happened, and then told the men to disperse. Someone suggested going for a drink and karaoke, but he wasn’t interested, so he left alone.
He walked along the path, back to the alley behind ‘Perfect’, and seeing this familiar sight, he relaxed again. Leaning against the wall, he relit a cigarette and inhaled slowly.
The back door of the ‘Perfect’ opened, and a slender figure carrying a bag of something walked out. Chi Mo subconsciously straightened up, but when he saw who it was, he was a little disappointed.
‘What are you doing here?’ Ru Fei threw the black garbage bag into the incinerator, then poured gasoline on it and lit it.
‘I just finished something and came over to catch my breath.’ Chi Mo leaned lazily against the wall and looked at the bright red fire.
There was a faint smell of blood on the man, so she didn’t ask him any more questions, even though she had glanced at him. Women in the red light district could pretend to be innocent, act like sluts, flatter, and be coquettish, but they could never be curious. You know, curiosity killed the cat.
She patted the ash off her body, took the cigarette by Chi Mo’s mouth and took a drag, leaning against the wall, and said to the man beside her, ‘Wei Xi didn’t come today.’
‘Really? What happened to her?‘ Chi Mo asked, lighting another cigarette.
He rubbed his forehead with the cigarette between his fingers. “I called her, but her phone was off. She probably wasn’t feeling well. I saw her face looked pale this morning.”
’Oh.‘ Chi Mo nodded, exhaling a smoke ring into the air. “Do you want to come over to my place today?”
’No, I haven’t spent all the money you gave me last time.’
Chi Mo didn’t say anything else. He was not a good man. He never relied on anyone, and he didn’t want to be anyone’s support either. He was a beast that roamed in the darkness, with a special liking for human greed.
He and Ru Fei, everyone, including Wei Xi, thought that they were an intimate couple. But the truth was that they knew the truth themselves, and every time it was a naked transaction of money.
He knew that Ru Fei was not that kind of woman, but apart from this, he could not give her anything else. Without this, he doesn’t know how to maintain this relationship.
This is probably the most ruthless thing about men: they can separate love from sex and divide them clearly.
He is a selfish man who can repay the debt of money. He doesn’t want to repay the debt of emotions, and he can’t repay it either.
‘That’s fine…’ Chi Mo put out his cigarette and was about to leave, ‘Ru Fei, if one day you don’t want to continue, you must tell me.’
Ru Fei tilted her head at him and gave a sly smile. ‘I’m not one of those clingy women who won’t let go, so you don’t need to keep reminding me. But I’ve heard that Wei Chengbao already knows that you were the one who smashed the alarm that day.’
Chi Mo was a little surprised, and then sneered, ‘It’s true that no wall is impervious to sound.’
Ru Fei gave him a look. ‘This matter can be serious or trivial. Anyway, you be careful. And thank you for saving Wei Xi.’ She smiled again, as if talking to herself, ‘But it’s better not to say this.’
Ru Fei’s phone suddenly rang. She took it out and saw that it was an unfamiliar number, but it also felt a bit familiar. She suddenly remembered that it was Ruan Shaonan.
Ru Fei’s face changed after she finished the call. Chi Mo, who was standing nearby, asked, ‘What’s wrong?’
‘Weixi is in the hospital. I have to go there now.’
Chi Mo took out the motorcycle keys and said, ‘It’s hard to get a taxi at this hour. I’ll give you a ride.’
When they arrived at the hospital room, Wei Xi had not yet woken up. Ruan Shaonan was sitting by the bed, holding her hand.
Chi Mo froze when he saw Ruan Shaonan. He knew who the man was, but he was so surprised that he could not speak. Not daring to go in, but also not at ease leaving them alone, he stayed by the door.
If not walked in, not a word, just Wei Xi’s hand from Ruan Shaonan’s hand, put back in the quilt.
Ruan Shaonan said nothing, remaining silent at the side. At that moment, the pride of the heavens looked like a primary school student who had done something wrong.
Wei Xi’s face was whiter than the bed sheet. If he didn’t stroke her face tenderly, he would turn his face and look at the man standing by the bed, his gaze burning, ‘Mr. Ruan, don’t you think you should explain to me?’
“We were at the beach, and she suddenly had an attack. She didn’t get better even after taking medicine. I took her to the hospital, and the doctor said that it wasn’t asthma, it was hyperventilation.’
‘Hyperventilation?‘
’It is a respiratory disorder caused by excessive stress or emotional trauma. The sufferer breathes rapidly to reduce the carbon dioxide level in the blood, which triggers the attack. The symptoms are similar to asthma. It is painful, but…it is not life-threatening.’ Ruan Shaonan repeated the doctor’s words like a parrot.
If was so sad and angry that he looked at the person lying in bed with pain in his heart and raised his face, ’Mr. Ruan, do you mind if I have a word with you alone?’
Ruan Shaonan hesitated a little. If not, he turned his face and said to Chi Mo, who was guarding the door, ‘Please take care of her for me.’ Then he said to Ruan Shaonan, who looked puzzled, ‘When you were too busy seeking revenge on the Lu family, Ling Luochuan came and bullied Wei Xi. He was the one who saved Wei Xi. He is our friend, has always taken good care of Weixi, and Weixi trusts him. I am asking him to take care of her now. If Weixi loses a single hair during this time, I will let you do whatever you want with me. Of course, you can talk here if you want, as long as you don’t mind waking her up.”
Ruan Shaonan said, “It’s not that serious,” and looked at Chi Mo again, nodding very gentlemanly to him, ’Thank you for taking care of Weixi all this time.
Ruan Shaonan and Ru Fei went out. Chi Mo sat by the bedside, keeping watch over the person lying on the bed for them.
She seemed to be sleeping uneasily, her eyebrows knitted together as if she were having a nightmare. He saw her nose tighten. He thought she was going to cry, but who knew, she was just shaking, shaking in waves, as if being chased by something terrible, her whole body curled up, her whole face knitted together, no tears, just trembling.
Chi Mo was deeply moved by the scene before him. He really couldn’t imagine what kind of fear could make someone scared like this? What kind of experience could make someone afraid to cry out loud even in their dreams?
She was a soft woman, but the one he had seen, even in the most difficult times, had always had a proud spirit. He had never seen her so vulnerable.
The wind picked up. The window was not closed properly, and the wind whipped the curtains around in the dark night, like the wings of a bird.
Chi Mo looked at the person in the bed, whose pale face looked like a wilted flower. He whispered, ‘Ruan Shaonan, Ling Luochuan… God, do you even know what kind of people you’ve messed with?’
If not for the fact that when they returned to the ward, Chi Mo was closing the window, and if not for the fact that Ru Fei had placed the purchased midnight snack on the table, the person in the bed would have seemed extremely tired and had no intention of waking up at all.
‘He’s gone?’ Chi Mo asked.
Ru Fei nodded, and collapsed in relief into the chair by the bed.
Chi Mo looked at her, ‘Don’t you want to tell me something?’
Ru Fei tilted her face upwards, ‘I’m hungry, let’s eat while we talk.’
The two sat on the balcony outside the ward, drinking beer and eating chicken wings. The whole city was silent, and occasionally the cry of a wild bird could be heard in the darkness. The night was deep, with neon lights twinkling in the distance, and the noise of the world felt so far away at the moment.
‘What do you want to know?‘ Ruo Fei was suddenly more energetic after nibbling on a few chicken wings.
’I should say, I want to confirm something. I know that one of the customers you offended at the restaurant ‘Perfect’ last time was Ruan Shaonan. At that time, he had his eye on Wei Xi, and she then became his…’ Chi Sheng suddenly felt unable to continue with the obvious answer. However, just now in the hospital room, the man had been so intimate with her, which could not help but make people imagine all kinds of things.
If that was all there was to it, it would be simple. It’s not what you think between them.”
Looking at the man’s puzzled expression, Ruifei sighed, “These are the things that Weixi told me at the orphanage. This story is a bit long, so maybe I should start with Weixi’s background…”
That night, Chi Mo kept drinking in silence. Even though his heart was shaken and throbbing, he hid it well. He didn’t want to appear too surprised, as that might affect the narrator’s mood.
“Lu Zixu had more than one woman. Among all his mistresses, Weixi’s mother was the most favoured. She was very beautiful, as you can see from Weixi. So, after his wife died, he officially married her mother and took them both back to the Lu family. But for Weixi, that was the beginning of a nightmare. Lu Zixu was no saint, and he raised his children to be ruthless little brats. Weixi had two older brothers and an older sister. Weixi’s mother was weak-willed, and Weixi became their toy to vent their anger. Children can be cruel, and you can imagine what kind of life Weixi led during those years. It wasn’t until she was fourteen that she met Ruan Shaonan.
If it weren’t for the beer and the moon in the sky, ‘I don’t know why, but when Ruan Shaonan first saw Wei Xi, he liked her very much. The Ruan and Lu families had been friends for generations and often visited each other. He came to see her every few days, taking care of her, looking after her, and fulfilling all her wishes, almost as if he were answering her prayers. With his protection, Wei Xi’s days at the Lu family home were much better, and they were probably the best time of her adolescence. Unfortunately, the good times didn’t last long.’
Chi Mo frowned, sensing that what was to come would not be pleasant.
Sure enough, Ruan Shounan sighed, ‘Due to conflicting interests in the marketplace, Ruan Shounan’s father was forced by Lu Zixu to jump from the 30th floor, bloodied and mangled. He and his mother fled to the United States to survive. Since then, he has had no news. Not long after that, something happened to Weixi’s mother. The person who dared not even speak loudly in front of the Lu family members actually slit her wrists in her husband’s bed. When Lu Zixu discovered it, the bed was covered in blood and the body was already stiff. After her mother’s funeral, Weixi left the Lu family. She was completely unimportant in the Lu family, and no one cared whether she lived or died. She was alone on the streets, a teenager, and it took a whole week before someone from a welfare organisation found her and sent her to an orphanage.
If I hadn’t turned my face away and looked at the silent man beside me, ‘So, you should know by now, Weixi, that she has loved Ruan Shaonan since she was fourteen, for a whole seven years. When we were in the orphanage, I didn’t know Ruan Shaonan’s name, and she only told me after they had reunited. All I knew then was that there was someone living in Weixi’s heart. She talked to him, smiled at him, and for a long time, she lived in the past, unwilling to come out. The year she spent with him was like her entire childhood. I even suspected that her entire adolescence was actually spent with Ruan Shaonan, in the castle she built with her memories and flesh and blood. Even though he is no longer here, and even if they meet again, all that awaits them is a deep-seated hatred that she can’t let go of, and she won’t leave…’
The man suppressed the stirring in his heart and couldn’t help but ask, ‘What about him? Does he love her this much too?’
Ru Fei smiled, ‘Even Weixi doesn’t know. She’s so smart, she can’t see through him, so I don’t know either.’
Ru Fei raised her face and looked at the stars twinkling in the sky, ‘Have you ever thought about this: what would you do if the person you love most in the world is also the person who hates you most?’
Chi Mo pondered for a moment and replied, ‘What happened back then had nothing to do with Wei Xi. She didn’t even benefit from it, so there’s no reason for him to hate her too.’
“That’s what I told Wei Xi at the time, but she told me that I had forgotten about a very scary emotion in this world called transferring anger. For Ruan Shaonan, who had been ruined by the Lu family, the reason that she was related to the Lu family was enough.’
Chi Mo was silent. It is true that human emotions, especially the emotion of revenge, are sometimes beyond control.
‘So, what did you just tell him? Tell him how much Weixi loves him?’
Ru Fei laughed, ‘Am I crazy? I told him that if he dares to hurt Weixi, I will never let him go even if I become a ghost.’
“What did he say?’
Ru Fei’s eyes looked in an unknown direction, suddenly becoming deep and profound, ‘He said that even if he made everyone in the world a ghost, he would not let anyone hurt her even a little.’
Chi Mo was stunned for a moment, and after a while, he sneered, ‘What is this?’
‘I think…’ Ru Fei took a sip of beer, ‘he is expressing his love in a different way.’
Chi Mo suddenly understood something, and he smiled coldly, ‘You deliberately brought me here today?’
Ruifei’s response was very cold, ‘You wanted to come here yourself, I was just going with the flow.’
‘You knew about it a long time ago, didn’t you?’
‘Yes, I knew! The first day I was with you, I knew.’ Ruifei turned her face and looked at the man’s handsome profile, a temptation that was irresistible to anyone who laid eyes on it.
‘Then why did you sleep with me? Ruifei Mo, what were you thinking?’ Chi Mo grabbed Ruifei’s arm, her fingers almost embedded in her flesh.
Ruifei looked at him, her eyes drifting, with an indescribable heat. ‘Because I’m just like you. Because I know I’ll never get the one I love, so I crave his breath, I crave his smell. As long as I can hold him close, even if it’s fleeting, even if it’s like a moth to a flame, I’d rather die for him.’
Her fingers gently stroked his face, her delicate curves pressed against his powerful body, her tantalising breath lingering around his lips, tinged with a hint of sadness and a fatal allure. ‘I know what it is about me that fascinates you. It’s okay, you can keep using me. I know your pain, your loneliness, the emptiness inside you, all your pain and confusion, I feel it all the same.’
Chi Mo grabbed Ruo Fei’s hair, and her sharp black eyes coldly pierced her face, ‘I’m not some kind of gentleman, I don’t care about leaving you covered in bruises, are you really sure you don’t mind?’
Ruo Fei’s arms snake-like around his neck, murmuring, ‘Yes, if it’s you, I have no taboos.’
Chi Mo smiled, tightly hugging this moving body in his arms, and said with pain, ‘But I do mind!’
Chapter 13: A woman’s most cruel humiliation
Hyperventilation is not a serious illness, and Wei Xi was able to be discharged from the hospital the next day.
After she was discharged, everything seemed to be very peaceful. The end of the semester was approaching, and she was busy with classes and part-time work. Whenever she had a little free time, she would grab her sketchpad and go out with her classmates to sketch. She used every means possible to keep herself from having any spare time, because whenever she stopped, she felt that the sky in this city was grey.
The department informed her to prepare her CV. The scholarship had already been approved, and she only needed to submit some documents to complete the process. When Wei-xi learned this news, she felt nothing. Because she knew that it meant nothing and would not change anything.
Ruan Shaonan just liked to comfort her, just like when they were children, whenever she was sad, he would buy her little gifts to cheer her up. But this would not change her fate.
He had said that he would never let her go, and that he would never let her go for the rest of her life.
In December, the coastal city, which never had winter, unexpectedly had a heavy snowfall. The elderly people said that it was a miracle that had not happened in decades.
When Wei-xi woke up in the morning, she saw large flakes of snow falling from the sky through the grey window.
Ruxi was very happy, and used her sleeve to wipe a small patch of glass clean, looking outside with great interest. ‘Come and look, Wei-xi, this is the first time I’ve seen snow since I was a child, real snow!’
Wei Xi hugged the quilt and looked at her and smiled. Ru Fei really is a very contented person.
It was a bad weather day, so they had breakfast at home. When Ru Fei returned with breakfast, she also brought a stack of gossip newspapers. She nibbled on a doughnut while reading the newspaper with relish. Suddenly, a news story stunned her.
She looked up at Weixi, who was drinking oolong tea, and pushed the newspaper towards her. ‘Weixi, your sister…hanged herself at the Luk family villa.’
‘What?’ Weixi nearly choked on the oolong tea.
‘Read it for yourself,’ Ruifei said, pointing to the huge headline in the newspaper.
Weixi snatched the newspaper away.
‘It says that she lost all her assets in futures trading and owed a large sum of money to the bank. Her husband added insult to injury by divorcing her and claiming to have nothing to do with the Luk family. What’s more, the Securities and Futures Commission is investigating her for fraudulently manipulating the stock market and defrauding small investors. Once she is charged, she will go to jail. Unable to bear the pressure, she hanged herself at the Luk family villa in Northview and her body was not discovered for a week.’
Wei Xi frowned and muttered, ‘Beijing Villa? That’s the old Lu family residence, which has been on hold for a long time.’
She suddenly felt a suffocating coldness. Ruan Shaonan had promised last time that no one from the Lu family would bother her again. It turned out that he was promising her sister to die!
“Looking at this photo, I guess when the door was broken open, the police didn’t arrive yet, but the reporters did. The fact that this photo was released shows that the Lu family is really falling apart. Now everyone is pushing against the wall.‘
’It’s the end of the road…’ Wei Xi sighed. ’She always loved to be pretty. I remember when we were kids, every time she went out, she had to dress up like a noble princess. I never thought that now… Chinese people pay attention to being buried in peace. No matter how poor you were while you were alive, you should be respected after you die. The media is so inhumane for exposing such photos.’
If I didn’t laugh, ‘she used to cut your clothes, cut your hair, and smear chili water on your face, and I don’t think she would have imagined this day for herself.’
Weixi put down the newspaper and folded it in half, ‘Actually, she is considered to be good in the Lu family. She has a princess temper, but a simple mind. The most terrifying thing is my second brother, who hides a knife in his smile and can kill someone with one move. He used to be a demon, and now I don’t know what he will become.’
After a moment’s thought, she suddenly said very seriously to the person sitting opposite her, ‘Weixi, have you ever thought that perhaps it is not the media that is inhumane, but someone who has instructed them to do so.’
Weixi was taken aback by these words.
“I have always felt that Ruan Shaonan is avenging you in his own way. No! I should say, avenging you both. Perhaps…he really does love you.’
Wei Xi looked at her strangely. ‘You used to have a different attitude. How come you’ve changed sides so quickly?’
‘I just feel that we’re being too pessimistic. Ruan Shaonan certainly wants to take revenge, but if he really loves you, he may not take it out on you. Besides, the Lu family has always treated you badly, and Ruan Shaonan knows this very well.’
Wei Xi sighed. ‘Do you think I’m just afraid of taking the blame?’
Ruixi sighed, ‘What else are you afraid of?’
Ruixi hesitated for a moment before saying, ‘Ruixi, do you remember that we used to watch a movie together called “Nostalgia”? We both pitied those Nanyang sisters. They endured the most cruel humiliation as women in a foreign country when the country was at its weakest, suffering the ravages of foreign men, supporting their relatives back home with their flesh and blood, but never having the face to return to their homeland.’
‘I remember that their graves in Southeast Asia all face away from their hometowns.‘ Ruo Fei looked at Ruo Fei strangely and said, “Why did you suddenly think of this?”
’It’s kind of inspired. Ruan Shaonan’s mother was in the United States at that time…’
Wei Xi couldn’t continue, and Rufei stared at her with wide eyes, and Wei Xi nodded gently. Rufei was shocked and covered her mouth, and after a while she stuttered, ‘No…no way, how could this be?’
“At that time, the Ruan family had completely fallen, just like the current situation of the Lu family. When they fled to the United States, they were penniless. Lu Zixu…’ Wei Xi let out a long sigh, ’I have to say, he was very good at playing with his enemies, even sparing the widow and orphaned children. He found them very quickly, and instead of killing them, he came up with even better ways to torture them. He used his connections in the United States to make sure that they couldn’t even find a job washing dishes. He even sent someone to break Ruan Shaonan’s legs, and since they didn’t have the money for hospital fees, Ruan Shaonan would be disabled for life. At that time, they were at a loss as to what to do. Their mother was just a woman. Apart from betraying herself, what else could she do to save her son? ‘
Ru shook his head. ’Great mother…that, Weixi, forgive me for saying this, but before I only thought that your father was a beast in human clothing. I have just realised that he is actually worse than a beast.’
Wei Xi smiled, ‘Don’t feel offended, your assessment is quite fair.’
‘But this matter should be very secret, how do you know so clearly?’
‘Secret?’ Wei Xi shook her head and sighed, ‘It wasn’t secret at all. At the time, this matter was in high society and almost everyone knew about it. Lu Zixu even had someone take pictures of his mother soliciting on the streets of the United States, which were widely circulated in the circles. For a time, it became the laughing stock of celebrities and noblewomen after dinner.’
If Ru Fei hadn’t screamed, ‘My God! He…this is too shameless! What deep hatred could there be that he would go to such extremes?’
Wei Xi looked at Ru Fei with a solemn expression in her eyes, ‘This is the most terrifying thing about Lu Zixu. He wants to set an example by killing the chicken to warn the monkey, so that everyone is afraid of him and dares not go against him. In the past, at the Lu family, he said something to all of our children, and I have never forgotten it until now.’
“What did he say?’
‘He said that to get revenge on someone, you don’t have to kill them, but you have to make their lives a living hell. To strike someone, you don’t have to destroy their body, but you have to destroy their dignity. You have to make them remember you and tremble with fear, feel ashamed and embarrassed. That’s the way to completely destroy someone.”
If I weren’t so shocked, I would be speechless. ’Now I finally understand why your brothers and sisters are so shameless.
Wei Xi laughed mockingly, ‘Yes, being his children, either you become insane or pessimistic and world-weary, there is no such thing as normal. He is like a lion, pushing his children off a cliff one by one, and watching them climb back up again, bit by bit, until only the strongest can become the king. Darwin was the man he admired most in his life, and he cited his theory of evolution as the classic, believing it without a doubt.’
‘I finally understand now why Ruan Shaonan’s revenge was so crazy. With such a deep blood feud, no one would not go crazy.”
Wei Xi shook his head, his eyes fixed on the newspaper that had just been folded. ’Now, he’s not just taking revenge, he’s also settling scores. Remember what we heard at the food stall last time? Most of the people whose families were destroyed by Ruan Shaonan were partners of my father. He is settling scores with everyone involved in this matter and everyone who knows about it, sparing no one.”
If wasn’t for the sudden shock, the chill in her heart would have sprung up like bamboo shoots after rain. She grabbed Weixi’s arm, “Are you saying that you are one of them?”
If hoped that she was wrong, but Weixi’s answer confirmed her suspicions.
‘To Ruan Shaonan, I am a witness and a recorder. I witnessed his humiliating history and recorded his tragic past. I do not deny that he may like me a little, so he has not done anything to me yet. The joy of our reunion temporarily overwhelmed everything. But once he has gotten rid of all those people, once he has calmed down from the joy, the last one he will get rid of will be me.’
If she hadn’t been truly panicked, she wouldn’t have thought things would develop this way. ‘But the outcome may not necessarily be like this. If…he really loves you, maybe he won’t care about that.’
Wei Xi let out a deep sigh and looked into Ru Fei’s eyes and said, ‘You also said it was just an “if”.
Chapter 14: If you can’t stand it anymore, you can’t stand it anymore
In a coastal city, snow cannot be kept on the roads. The streets are full of wheels spinning in the snow, and people walking with their trousers around their ankles.
The neon sign for the ‘Peerless Beauty’ is also covered in a layer of snow, and Weixi sweeps it off with a small broom.
The night wind is a little cold, so she pulls the collar of her uniform up, puts her reddened fingers, which are numb with cold, to her mouth and gently blows on them, as if that would warm them up a little.
It was almost time, and the ladies who worked here started to arrive one after the other. All kinds of beautiful women entered, dressed in beautiful clothes and wearing beautiful jewellery.
Many people said that the ‘absolutely beautiful’ ladies all drove to work in Mercedes-Benzes or BMWs. At first, Weixi also thought that was the case, but after working here for a long time, she realised that the rumours were really exaggerated. Many people left in luxury cars, but very few drove themselves.
The ladies here earn a lot, but they also spend a lot. Some of them are obsessed with buying designer brands. Cartier watches, Louis Vuitton bags, Chanel perfumes, and Lancome cosmetics. A complete set can cost tens of thousands of yuan. Where would they find the money to buy a car?
Some of them don’t like buying these beautiful but useless luxury goods, but they spend money faster than water. As for where the money goes, just look at their increasingly emaciated bodies and listless expressions, and you don’t need to ask.
In fact, once you embark on this path, no matter how you go, you are almost always heading in the same direction, which is the path of no return.
It is said that the beauty industry is the one that saves the most time and effort, with the fastest returns and the lowest costs. But who can really understand the myriad of emotions involved, except for the women themselves?
The snow had almost been cleared, and Weixi was about to go back with her tools in her hand. Just then, a black Rolls-Royce stopped in front of the door of ‘Perfect Beauty’.
This was nothing unusual, as the parking lot of ‘Perfect Beauty’ had always been a car show for all kinds of cars. But when she saw the person getting out of the car, Wei Xi was really taken aback.
‘CoCo…’ Wei Xi lost her voice and called out.
CoCo turned around and glanced at Wei Xi, expressionless. The man next to her put his hawk-like hands around her shoulders and kissed her on the cheek before letting her go.
CoCo turned back to him and waved her hand. Her back was facing Weixi, so Weixi couldn’t see her face.
She turned around and walked over. Weixi wanted to say something to her, but she didn’t seem to want to say hello. Her beautiful leather boots casually stepped in the mud, splashing countless mud spots.
A few days ago she was fine, but what was wrong with her today?
Weixi was really surprised. When she went to the bar to get a drink, she couldn’t help but ask Feng, ‘What’s wrong with CoCo?’
Feng looked up and saw Coco, who was playing the decks on the high platform. ‘Nothing much, just that the song she played today was a bit lame. I told her a long time ago to try something new, because the guests nowadays have very discerning tastes, but she just wouldn’t listen.’
‘That’s not what I’m asking. I saw that it was Master Chen who brought her here today. What’s going on?’
‘Oh…’ Feng shrugged, ‘I guess you’ll have to ask her yourself. But I heard that she seems to be quitting after today.’
Wei Xi was even more surprised.
Wei Xi was in a low mood today. The indifferent expression on Coco’s face kept spinning in front of her eyes, and the way Feng mentioned this matter with such disdain made her even more surprised.
When she was burning the rubbish, it seemed that she was affected by her bad mood, and even the lighter was against her, as it wouldn’t light. She wanted to go back and find some matches, but as soon as she turned around, she saw Coco standing silently by the back door, looking at her with a lost expression.
They sat on the basketball goal, looking at the abandoned court in front of them. The place was overgrown with weeds and desolate. Wei Xi couldn’t help but wonder more than once how such a place could exist. It didn’t match the materialistic city at all.
‘You don’t want some?’ CoCo waved the beer can in her hand.
“No, I’ll just have some water. I was in the hospital a few days ago, so I don’t even dare to drink.’
CoCo turned her head and looked at Weixi, and gave a wry smile. ‘Weixi, sometimes, I really envy you. You seem to have no desires, and in a place like this, surrounded by these people, how do you manage?’
Weixi took a sip of her drink. ‘Everyone has desires, it’s just that my desires are not like yours.’
‘How are they different?’
“Your desires can be exchanged for material things, but my desires are invisible and intangible, they lurk in my heart.’
CoCo laughed, her eyes glazed over with drunkenness, and said, ‘Weixi, is there something you want to ask me?’
Weixi looked at this young and beautiful face in front of her. She really had a lot of questions. ‘CoCo, you should know what kind of person that man is. How many young ladies here has he ruined? Do you know what happened to that college student from the art academy last time?’
“I know… Everyone knows the tricks of that Mr. Chen. First, he fed you with jewels and fine clothes every day. Once you’re used to it, there’s no turning back, and he’s almost tired of it. When you break up, he won’t let you take anything with you, and if you show the slightest dissatisfaction, he’ll have his bodyguards beat you up. That girl had her nose broken by him at the time. A few days ago, I heard that someone had seen her at a massage parlor on the next street over.”
Wei Xi became a little impatient, “You know that, so why…” CoCo curled up a little, and Wei Xi couldn’t continue.
‘Do you think I want to?’ CoCo hung her head, her long eyelashes hiding her eyes. ’Wei Chengbao has made it clear that if I don’t agree, he will make me a pariah for the rest of my life. Weixi, I’m not you. I didn’t go to university, I don’t have a talent for painting, and I don’t have a friend like Ru Fei to depend on. Apart from being a DJ, I can’t do anything else. I’m a girl with no background, no support, no friends, what else can I do?’
Wei Xi paused for a moment, and then asked, ‘What does Mark say about this?’
‘Heh…’ CoCo snorted, ‘Him? Wei Chengbao threatens me with his mouth, and he immediately tells me to pack my bags and leave. Thinking back, I felt so stupid when I scrimped and saved to buy him an electric guitar. I now understand that men are only hard down there when they are soft up there. All those promises and vows are not worth half a piece of toast.”
Wei Xi sighed, “Not all men are like that, you just haven’t met the right person.”
CoCo laughed, “Wei Xi, do you remember what Xiao Wen told us before? Once Wei Chengbao asked her to go to a hotel to serve a man with a lot of background…”
Wei Xi nodded, ’I remember, when she entered the room, she found that the man’s wife and child were sleeping on the bed, sound asleep. She wanted to leave, but the man dragged her into the bathroom. While they were doing it, the man’s wife and child slept outside. The whole time, she didn’t dare make a sound. She said it felt like an eternity.
“Can you imagine? I was so shocked I couldn’t even speak. A man, with his wife and child outside, just a wall away, had sex with a call girl. Everyone says prostitutes are despicable, but who is really despicable?’
Wei Xi was speechless. The snow was falling again, and large flakes of snow were blown up by the wind, looking very much like willow catkins in late spring.
The two of them were at a loss for words. CoCo was speechless, and Wei Xi wanted to say something, but didn’t know what.
After a while, CoCo hugged her knees with her arms and mumbled like a child, ‘Wei Xi, you don’t have to feel bad for me. In fact, if you look closely, there’s nothing bad about it now. I’m living in his villa now, and I’ve never seen such a magnificent house before. Wei Chengbao was right when he said that women are born to be fucked by men. What does it matter if it’s Mark or any other man? Mark is worse than those other men. I treated him so well, but he still dumped me. Men are all the same. I’ll just endure it for a while, and it’ll all be over. It’s no big deal…’
As she spoke, she bit her fingers, self-abusing, leaving bright red bloodstains.
Weixi looked at her blankly, as if she had returned to that terrible night, when she was lying helplessly in Ruan Shaonan’s bed, crying tears of blood, and lying to herself in the same way.
Time and space interlaced in an instant, the scene in front of her overlapping with past memories. Different appearances, different voices, but the same timid eyes and resigned expression.
Weixi, you must listen to me. If you listen to me, we will have food to eat and a place to live. Although your brothers and sisters are not good, the people outside are even worse. The men outside will not only scold and beat you, they will also bully you. Weixi, you must remember, we are women, and women who are not capable will always be bullied by men. As long as we listen and do not resist, we will not have to go hungry, we will not be beaten, and we will be able to have a few good days. If we can just bear with it, bear with it, we’ll be fine…
Who was the person speaking to her? Who was the person who said these words to her back then?
Back then, she really did obey. Whenever her mother told her to bear with it, she would bear with it. She would bear with it however her mother asked her to. But in the end, she bore with it, but the person who told her to bear with it did not. No one would have thought that that weak and cowardly woman would lie next to her husband and use a small pencil sharpener to cut her artery.
Wei Xi had seen the wound, the skin turned inside out, the flesh all ground up. The pencil knife was not very effective, and it took many repeated strokes in the same place to succeed. Wei Xi could not imagine what kind of state of mind her mother, who had always been timid and afraid, and always obedient in front of the Lu family, was in when she used a method bordering on self-mutilation to end her life.
Was it only when she was pushed to the point of ‘unbearable, unable to bear anymore’ that she did so?
Yes, her poor mother no longer had to endure, she was free. She was left alone, facing a world full of joy.
Wei-xi looked up, gazing at the distant, blurry lights of thousands of households, and the world of vanity beyond the desolation. As if talking to herself, she asked the person next to her, ‘Endure? Where do you want to endure? With your life and property in someone else’s hands, how can you endure? You can’t even choose your own future, so what do you have to endure? Do you know? Endurance also requires capital. Those of us who are at the mercy of others, who do whatever others tell us to do, who do whatever others want, no matter where or how, what makes you think you can endure?
It’s just self-deception…
CoCo froze for a moment, then leaned over Weixi’s shoulder and burst into tears. She didn’t cry out loud, but just cried a little, then stopped, as if a child who has cried too hard has choked on its own breath.
‘Weixi…if one day…I die, can you help me collect my body, just like…you did for Xiaowen? I…don’t want to be an anonymous corpse, dead…and become a lonely ghost…”
Weixi hugged her and smiled gently, ’If I’m still alive, I’ll definitely help you. If I’m dead, Ruixi will help you. If we’re both dead and everyone has become a lonely ghost, you don’t have to be afraid, even if you go to hell, we’ll be with you.’
CoCo trembled slightly, and looked at her with tear-filled eyes. ‘Weixi, do you think there really is a hell?’
‘Hell?’ Weixi muttered to herself, staring into the distance as if she wanted to peer through the impenetrable darkness before her and go to the other side of the world to find out.
‘I don’t know. What place is this? What is hell? Where are we? I can’t tell…’
Chapter 15 Abuse
What is life? It is about spending most of our time experiencing pain and finding solutions to it.
Hunger, poverty, illness, homelessness, and so on…
When Ruan Shaonan called, Wei Xi and Ru Fei were about to go home after work.
Wei Xi watched as Ruan Shaonan’s name flashed on the screen. He had given her the phone. After she smashed her old phone, he bought her this one and had Wang Dongyang deliver it to her at school.
The latest model, naturally not cheap. When Wei Xi received the phone, there was already a string of numbers stored in the phone book. Ruan Shaonan’s mobile phone, office phone, home phone, secretary’s desk phone, driver’s phone…even his assistant’s phone number was there.
The phone kept ringing, and Wei Xi answered it resignedly.
‘Wei Xi, I miss you.‘
Very good, a simple and direct sentence that goes straight to the heart. Wei Xi can almost see the unmistakable expression on the other end of the line.
’It’s late, I want to go home…‘ Wei Xi tries to make a last-ditch effort.
’Shouldn’t you find a better place to bury your mother’s ashes and let her rest in peace?’ He says slowly, his tone light and indifferent.
This was non-negotiable. Wei Xi looked up at the high, clear sky. The wind was blowing snowflakes, which was cold, but not as cold as his words.
‘I’ll have my driver pick you up.’ This was a statement, not a question. He always knew where her weak points were, and he didn’t think she could refuse.
Wei Xi felt a pang of sadness in her heart and asked, ‘Where are you? I’ll go myself.’
Ruan Shaonan seemed a little surprised, and after a slight pause, he said, ‘I’m at the company, you know where it is.’
After putting down the phone, Wei Xi looked at Ru Fei and said apologetically, ‘Ru Fei, you go home by yourself.’
Ru Fei grabbed her arm, looking nervous, ‘Will something happen?’
Wei Xi shook her head and smiled bitterly, ‘Nothing serious will happen. But…’ Her eyes were full of cold sorrow, ‘I don’t want there to be a next time.’
Ruan Shaonan stood on the top floor of the Yitian Group, looking out the floor-to-ceiling windows at the snowflakes swirling around. The silver-white flakes danced and flew lightly, wrapping the dark night in a world of silver and white.
Perhaps it was the neon lights, but the sky at the moment was a strange dark red, as if the night’s chest had been stained with blood. Below were the brightly lit lights of the city. Because it was in the busiest commercial district, even after midnight, it was still bustling and unearthly.
Few people know that Chairman Yi Tian has a sizable living room on the top floor of the company. This was specially done after he took over Yi Tian, when the meeting room on the top floor was partitioned into its current size.
There is a bedroom, study, bathroom, separate toilet, kitchen, and even a small bar. Whenever he works late into the night, he rests here. So he spends more time here than at home.
In fact, apart from work, there is another reason: he likes it here better than the villa near the beach.
One must always stand high to understand how small people at lower levels are. Only then can one admonish oneself never to be the one to bow to others.
Haha, let’s be prepared for danger in times of peace…
Ding dong! It was the sound of the elevator, and he had a private elevator that went directly here. Ruan Shaonan put down his glass, opened the door, and saw a snowman.
Wei Xi was completely white, her clothes, hair, eyebrows, and even eyelashes were covered in snowflakes. The temperature in the house was high, and the snow quickly melted into water, as if it had rained heavily, except that this rain was different from the rain in midsummer, cold like frostbite.
Ruan Shaonan stood in the doorway for three seconds, almost unable to recognise the woman standing in front of him. There wasn’t a dry spot on her.
He locked the door, said nothing, ignored her, and went into another room. Wei Xi stood there, like a drowning stray cat, barefoot, with water dripping from her hair onto the shiny floor.
When Ruan Shaonan came out again, he was holding a towel in his hand and threw it in her face without saying a word. Wei Xi was about to take it off when her feet left the ground. Before she knew what was going on, she was picked up in his arms and carried horizontally.
He carried her into the bathroom and threw her straight into the bathtub like a sack. His square bathtub was very big, and Wei Xi was almost submerged in the water without even taking off her clothes.
The water was hot, like countless needles stabbing her, like torture. Wei Xi hugged herself with her arms, her shoulders involuntarily hunched together. The water suddenly rose, and she was locked in place by one arm.
Ruan Shaonan held her in one arm, his other hand casually resting on the edge of the bathtub, his back against the edge, his eyes slightly closed.
His lips were pursed, his jaw was taut, his Adam’s apple bobbed up and down, and his fists by the side of the tub were clenched tightly together, as if he was trying hard to hold back something.
After getting used to the water temperature, Wei Xi’s body gradually warmed up, but since she hadn’t taken off her clothes, she couldn’t help squirming after a while because it was so itchy.
‘What’s wrong?’ Ruan Shaonan opened his eyes. She had moved very gently, but he was very perceptive.
“I don’t feel very well,’
Ruan Shaonan turned her body so that she was facing him.
Wei Xi then noticed that his figure was surprisingly good. His shoulders were broad and his arms long, with the standard model physique. No wonder he looked so good in whatever he wore. He probably exercised regularly, and his bulging muscles, with every line and texture looking robust, concealed immeasurable danger and a primal animalism ready to pounce.
Her heart trembled, and she couldn’t help but flinch back a little. However, Ruan Shaonan grabbed her chin and observed every expression on her face, ‘Are you never going to be comfortable with me?’
‘You’re the one who asked me to come. You only said you missed me, but you didn’t say what kind of me you missed. If this doesn’t satisfy you, then next time, please let me know three days in advance what kind of expression you want.’ It was almost like a provocation.
As soon as the words came out, Wei Xi regretted them. She knew she shouldn’t have angered him. Trying to be clever with her tongue would only end in failure.
Sure enough, Ruan Shaonan exerted a little pressure and pushed her onto the soft couch by the pool. The angle was just right so that she wouldn’t feel too uncomfortable, but she couldn’t muster the strength to break free.
He was always like this, decisive and decisive in the midst of conversation and laughter. He could even control her fear of him to the right extent. He never pushed her to the point of fighting for her life, but he could make her fear him to the bone.
When his lips fell, there was a dizzying breath. Wei Xi’s heart shrunk into a ball, her face, which had just become a little rosy, instantly turned white, and her body could not help but freeze together.
This scene reminded her of that night that turned the world upside down. It was as if she had relived everything that night in an instant, once again setting off the raging waves of emotions in her heart, once again being crushed into powder and devoured clean.
She dared not look at him, her face trembling as she turned her face to the side. He, however, laughed and said mischievously in her ear, ‘You’re so scared, but you still provoke me?’
Ruan Shaonan saw the person beneath him looking at him without saying a word. She was in his arms, but her eyes were full of sadness and grievance. He couldn’t help but sigh, and moved closer to her ear, whispering softly, ‘Don’t be afraid. Don’t hold a grudge against me because of what happened last time, and don’t blame me for anything else. I’m angry with myself too. I didn’t really mean what I thought I did, but I used those despicable tactics on you. But Weixi, really, if there was any way, I wouldn’t have forced you like this. So don’t be afraid of me, and don’t avoid me. You don’t know how hard it is for me to see you like that.”
He kissed her lips and said softly, as if in a trance: ’Just like we used to be, okay? You used to like to cling to me a lot, and you don’t know how much I wished you would grow up quickly back then. But now you’re all grown up, but you’re distancing yourself from me. Weixi, you have to let me know what you want. If it’s something you want, something you like, there’s no way I can’t do it. If you want the stars in the sky, I’ll get them for you, okay?”
Stars? He knew in his heart that she didn’t want that, but why did he have to say something like that to make her feel better? She had made her feelings clear the last time they were at the beach, and his response was that she should never even think about it in her life.
Wei Xi turned her face away and replied indifferently, ‘I’ve had a bad day and I’m in a bad mood…
Ruan Shaonan didn’t say anything, but reached for her clothes. Wei Xi was taken aback. She never expected him to do that, and instinctively backed away, clutching her clothes in one hand. Dripping wet, she huddled in a corner like a miserable little mouse.
He pulled her close to him, so she couldn’t move around, and looked at her amusedly, ‘You don’t really want to take a bath with your clothes on, do you?’
Of course she didn’t want to, but… Wei Xi felt her face heating up.
He whispered in her ear, ‘I’ve seen it all before, so why are you blushing?’
His kiss landed on her back, leaving a tingling heat. Noticing her unusual reaction, he chuckled lightly, wrapped his arm around her shoulders, and stroked her face with her wet hair.
‘Why do you let your hair grow so long? It’s past your waist, isn’t it?’ He brushed her long hair to one side, and the black strands spread out in the water like lively algae.
‘I haven’t cut it much since I was fourteen, and I occasionally fix the split ends. Unfortunately, my hair isn’t good enough, so I’ll just have to leave it here.‘
’Would it be better if you used more conditioner?‘ He held a long lock of hair in his hand and felt the smoothness of the palm of his hand. “Just leave it long, I like it.”
She wrinkled her nose, “It’s a lot of trouble.”
’How much trouble?’ He turned her chin and deliberately argued with her, ’More trouble than having a baby?’
She laughed, not afraid of him at this point, ‘It’s more troublesome than having a baby. It’s hard to wash and hard to take care of. Don’t you believe it, try it yourself?’
He laughed, gave her a hug, and whispered in her ear, ‘Keep it, I’ll help you in the future…’
She wanted to say something, but in the end she didn’t. Suddenly, she was very fond of this atmosphere, the two of them together, like an old married couple, doing silly things, talking about trivial matters and family gossip.
But she knew that this fleeting happiness was stolen. When she laughed, she would occasionally become lost in thought. That smile then froze on her face, as if it were some kind of mark, commemorating the passing of a happy time.
Time cannot be turned back, history cannot be rewritten, and the course of events in the world will always follow its intended course, irreversible and irrevocable.
Every time she thinks about this, all the happiness in her heart vanishes into thin air, leaving only a faint aftertaste.
It turns out that happiness can be without tomorrow, which is really a sad thing…
‘By the way, what’s got you down?’ He rested his chin on her shoulder, his broad palm gently massaging her breast, and breathed warm air into her ear. Her worries did not affect him. At that moment, he was truly happy, a rare happiness that came from the heart.
Just a few gentle whispers and an intimate embrace made him so happy. She really had not expected that making him happy could be such a simple thing.
She pulled away his unfaithful hand and smiled, ‘They’re all trivial matters, you won’t be interested.’
‘No way! Tell me.’ He bit her shoulder, suddenly as overbearing as a child.
She laughed and dodged him, but the bathtub was only so big, where could she go? She thought for a moment and told him about Coco’s story in a simple way.
Ruan Shaonan was silent for a moment after listening, and asked, ‘Does she remind you of something?’
Wei Xi was suddenly startled. Ruan Shaonan didn’t say anything else, but just gave her a light kiss on the neck. ‘I’m done, you take your time.’
She heard a splash, and he went out with a towel around his waist.
The temperature in the bathroom hadn’t changed, but Wei Xi felt cold. She looked at her fingers, which had turned pale from the warm water, and water was running down between them, leaving her palms hollow. She clenched her fists, but all she held was emptiness.
She turned her face and saw his men’s shirt lying by the pool, presumably left there on purpose. Her clothes were still wet, so she guessed there would be no spare pajamas here.
She got out of the bath and dried herself with a towel. Then she picked up the shirt, the expensive fabric, the tailored cut, even the small cufflinks were made of understatedly expensive sapphires that glowed quietly in the light.
When she was at the Lu family’s, she knew that the truly rich people had everything they wore and used custom-made. From the big things like cars and mansions to the little things like a single button.
Wei Xi remembered that Ruan Shaonan used to like to wear white shirts. It was probably because he was still at school, and his white shirts were just the most ordinary kind. But they were always washed very white and clean, and when she pressed her face against them, she could smell the faint aroma of washing powder, like lilacs on a summer night, gently diffusing in the pale moonlight. It was a reassuring smell, and leaning in his arms, she never wanted to leave.
But now, feeling the delicate texture of the shirt, it feels strange to her. It should be said that, except for some moments that can evoke memories, everything about him now feels strange to her.
Outside the bedroom’s floor-to-ceiling windows is a wide terrace surrounded by colourful neon lights. In the middle is a small swimming pool, facing the bustling night view of the city.
Wei Xi couldn’t help but sigh again, it’s really great to be rich. Who would have thought to build a swimming pool so high up? Even if you could think of it, how many people could do it?
How carefree it must be to enjoy the moonlight, the breeze and the city’s prosperity?
However, the owner of the house was just sitting in front of the bedroom’s French windows drinking red wine, and didn’t seem to want to go swimming.
‘Come and sit down,’ he said, patting the cushion on the floor.
Wei Xi walked over, her hair still dripping and her shirt loose. She rolled up her sleeves and used a towel to dry her hair as she walked.
Ruan Shaonan poured her a cup of tea and continued drinking. Wei Xi noticed that he had drunk a lot, and in a short while the bottle of red wine was almost empty.
‘Can you swim?’ The atmosphere was a little tense, and he seemed unable to find a topic of conversation, so he asked casually.
Wei Xi looked at the pool water reflecting the starlight and smiled, ‘I have always been in awe of swimming pools, whether they are big or small, and I have never watched swimming competitions. I even feel sick when I see the water in a swimming pool.’
‘Why?’ he was a little curious.
Wei Xi whispered as she held her teacup, ‘If a person were pushed into the water again and again and pulled out again and again, I think they would feel the same as me.’
‘What?’ he was very surprised.
‘My second brother, Lu Renxi…’ Wei Xi looked steadily out at the pool of water outside, and suddenly felt a little weak. Her heart was pounding in her chest. She didn’t know if she had the courage to tell him everything that had happened. She never wanted to think about the past, about the outrageous encounters, the terrible humiliation, the days without seeing the light of day. She couldn’t tell him, and he would never know.
She will never forget that summer holiday, and the heinous things her second elder brother, Lu Renxi, the Lu family’s most valued and brightest child, did to her.
She told Ruan Shaonan how Lu Renxi pushed her under the water again and again, and how he pulled her out again and again. Each time, he made her look at his face. Sometimes she saw nothing, sometimes she could vaguely see his mocking eyes. Her lungs hurt as if they were going to explode, water choking her windpipe, her throat felt like it was being cut with a knife, and her nasal passages felt like they were on fire. Until she couldn’t stand it anymore… She began to beg him, crying and screaming, using every means to plead with him. But even so, he still wouldn’t let her go. After he had his fun, he pushed her under again.
As she spoke, her voice kept shaking uncontrollably, gradually becoming incoherent and fragmented. Her eyes were fixed and her expression blank, like a marionette whose paint had worn off.
Ruan Shaonan held her hand and unconsciously applied pressure, his strong fingers tightening little by little, almost cutting into her flesh.
However, Wei Xi was oblivious to all of this. She felt no pain and could not feel the man’s tension. She was defenceless, and plunged headlong into a flood of memories, as if she had fallen into an abyss.
She suddenly turned her face and looked straight at him, ‘Do you know what the fear he has instilled in me is? It is not violence, not death, but the fact that at a certain time in your life, there will be someone who can make you feel that living is worse than dying. And this time cannot be predicted, it is like the shadow that follows you everywhere, it will slowly drain you…’
‘Stop it!’ Ruan Shaonan couldn’t bear to hear anymore, and he grabbed her shoulders tightly, “Don’t say anymore…”
Weixi, however, smiled, a pale smile that, in the cool moonlight, seemed to be somewhat eerie. “You can’t bear to hear anymore? Does he also make you think of something?”
He raised his fierce eyes suddenly, like an enraged cheetah, whose eyes could dismember its prey and devour it. He grabbed her hard and pressed her whole body against the French windows, almost embedding her in the glass.
‘You did that on purpose!’ he spat through his teeth. ‘Did you plan everything you did, everything you said, every movement, every expression today?’
‘What do you think?’ she asked in return.
He grabbed her shoulders and almost wanted to tear her apart. ‘How can you be so horrible? I can’t believe it!’
Endure the excruciating pain as if her shoulders were being dismantled, she looked at him pitifully, ‘Who is really scary? If you have a clear conscience, why are you so angry now? Did what I did and said today make you feel uncomfortable? What about me? What kind of life have I been living for the past two months? You can push me into a dead end again and again, and then give me a straw to save me. It’s like being pushed into the water again and again, and then being pulled out again and again. This process…yes, it’s like torturing a hawk. You won’t be satisfied until I can’t take it anymore. So, the first time, you wouldn’t let me close my eyes, you wanted me to watch, to see how powerless and desperate I was. You had everything planned out, you wanted me to never dare refuse you, to even dream of you…’ She suddenly laughed, ’This is really a kind of romantic destruction, you must think you are the greatest lover in the world, don’t you?’
‘I said, stop talking…’ Ruan Shaonan slowly clasped her neck. His hands were cold, so cold that they made her shiver. A violent rage pounced on her face, and the cold eyes made her believe that if she said another word, he would really strangle her.
However, she was not afraid to die and insisted on continuing.
‘You are even more terrifying and more ruthless than Lu Renxi. You don’t even spare the dead, you can use them too. You make me so painful that I can’t even say a word. I really want to know, for someone like me who has nothing to lose, if one day I don’t even care about my mother’s ashes, what capital do you have?”
His thumb was stuck in her throat, and his fingers were cracking. He tried his best to control himself from raising his hand to slap her, his whole body shaking with the effort, but unable to stop the strength in his hand from devouring her.
Her throat was almost crushed by him, but she was still able to speak.
‘You will never know… these days… I only have one dream… and it’s of you… of the way you took everything by force… I wake up in a cold sweat from that dream… you want me to fall in love with you… is that even possible?’
The fatal blow!
Bang! He slammed her down onto the floor, his veins about to burst, the veins on his forehead standing out. Like a beast losing its mind, he picked her up and slammed her down again, almost knocking all the air out of her chest. Her vision went dark, she couldn’t breathe, it was just the pain, the pain was so terrible, like her ribs had been broken by a thousand-ton weight, like a bird had its wings broken and been thrown into the abyss.
He seemed to say something to her, but the sound was so distant that she couldn’t hear it clearly. He began to tear her clothes off, his movements so violent that it seemed as if he were trying to rip out her innards. She struggled violently, but he was so strong, so fierce and ruthless that it was as if he were trying to dismember her body and flay her alive.
The thin fabric could not withstand the intense pulling, and the sound of the tearing cloth was so harsh. Beneath the torn cloth, she was naked, as if she were a beautiful carcass made of white mutton fat, arousing the man’s primitive savagery. He almost savagely opened her thighs, pulled the straps of his bathrobe open, and his violent weapon was like a sharp sword, as if it wanted to pierce her stubbornness, her stubbornness, and her soft body alive.
In her panic, she reached for the bottle of wine. She grabbed it, but he was quicker, grabbed her wrist and slammed it onto the floor…
Snap! The bottle broke.
Something flowed from her hand, bright red, drop after drop.
Her fingers are linked, and she doesn’t know how many pieces have pierced her hand. Her vision goes dark, and the pain almost makes her faint. Cold sweat comes out, instantly soaking her whole body. She is cold and in pain, and her weak body can no longer bear it. She is pinned to the cold floor like a butterfly with broken wings, as if just waiting for the final shattering and final despair.
She turns her face to the side and looks at her trembling hand, which he is holding in the blood. She is already too weak to resist anything. Everything she could see was red, except for his breath, which covered her entire body coldly and overpoweringly.
He tore off her last barrier, thrust himself inside, pounding into her over and over, sinking into the warm, delicate place, using all his strength, his heavy breathing like that of a beast feeding, his cold teeth gnawing at her smooth skin, like the fierce gods and demons on the thangka, sinister and powerful, fierce and unstoppable.
Wei Xi’s vision became blurry, and she looked at her own bleeding water and the horrible red puddle on the floor, while hearing his frantic heartbeat, the low growl of a beast, and the sound of muscles and bones exerting force.
Cold sweat broke out on her body as he penetrated her fiercely, almost embedding her in his body. But that wasn’t enough for him, and he pulled her up and forced her into his arms. He kissed her parted lips and dazed eyes wildly, and her body was lifted high by him and then dropped heavily again. She trembled all over, her back was drenched in sweat, and her whole body felt as if it had been split in half by a sharp axe, so much did the pain make her unable to breathe.
She heard someone laughing, a creepy, miserable laugh, like some kind of demon, like it was coming from inside her.
She gasped, looked into his furious eyes, and said in a small, trembling voice, ‘Mr. Ruan… When you’re done, please tell me, how happy are you watching me bleed and tremble on top of you? When you’re done, please tell me, how happy are you abusing me like this?’
All the storm instantly ceased, and the room was so quiet that you could hear the heartbeat of the two people. Thump! Thump! Thump!
The whole world disappeared, all emotions collapsed instantly, and only the terrible, cold heartbeat was left. Thump! Thump! Thump!
I don’t know how long it took, a voice sounded fiercely in her ear, lowered its voice, and carried a hatred that could sweep everything away, ‘Get out of here! I never want to see you again!’
Chapter 16: As if they were strangers
That night, it was still Wang Dongyang who rushed over and took the two of them to the hospital. Ruan Shaonan’s hand was also injured, and he couldn’t drive himself, so he couldn’t let the blood keep flowing, so he called him over.
Wei Xi had a lot of glass fragments stuck in her left hand, but fortunately they were all relatively shallow and didn’t injure the nerves. The doctor only let Wei Xi stay in the hospital for observation for one day and then allowed her to go home. Before leaving, the doctor reminded her to remember to come back for regular wound dressings, not to get the wound wet, and not to eat any irritating foods, otherwise it would be difficult to get rid of the scar afterwards.
When Wei Xi was discharged from the hospital, the snow had stopped and the sun was out.
It was a fine day. If she hadn’t been there to complete the discharge procedures, Wei Xi would have been standing in the lobby waiting for her. It was also a coincidence that she happened to see Ruan Shaonan and Wang Dongyang walking towards her, one after the other.
Wei Xi froze for a moment. His injury was actually more serious than she had seen. She had thought he would stay for a few more days, and never expected to run into him so soon.
Ruan Shaonan also saw her, coldly, without any expression, and without avoiding her gaze. That detached look was like looking at a stranger.
He walked closer and closer. The surroundings were noisy, but to her it was like a silent movie, instantly removing all the noise. The entire hall was left with only the sound of his footsteps echoing hollowly. Her heart was beating faster and faster. She stood still, at a loss for a moment.
Then, he passed by her, and the whole world came to a standstill.
How should I describe this feeling? It was like life, like reincarnation, and the sweet and sour flavours of a lifetime were tasted in an instant, overwhelming her.
She was alone, standing in the hospital, where people came and went, as if she were standing in the torrent of time. Shuttling through the crowds, she was like a goldfish swimming in a fishbowl, and she was the only one left, standing alone outside the glass tank, looking at her own desolation and at this magnificent world.
He had already gone, but she was still standing here.
After that day, if she hadn’t been asked, ‘Is this what you wanted, to just pass each other by?’
They were sitting on the rooftop terrace watching the sunset, surrounded by the checkerboard-like high-rises. The so-called sunset was just a little afterglow between the buildings.
Weixi was finishing the assignment left by the professor when she heard Ruifei’s words and was suddenly startled. She used a knife to scrape off the excess, but she could never get back to the original effect. So she sighed, ‘Things have already turned out like this, do you think the answer still matters?’ Then she crumpled the drawing paper into a ball, threw it away, and replaced it with a new one.
Ruifei lit a cigarette and didn’t say anything.
She remembered that when she rushed to the emergency room, she was really shocked by the sight in front of her. However, what scared her was not Weixi, but Ruan Shaonan.
He was having stitches, and the wound almost crossed his entire wrist. Next to him on the tray was a large piece of just-removed glass shard, with its sharp edges standing out bloody, which was terrifying to look at. While the hospital was sewing him up, they told him, ‘Luckily, the nerve was not cut, otherwise you would lose the use of this hand.’
He didn’t show much emotion when he heard the doctor’s words. Usually such a flawless person looked a little disheveled at the moment, still wearing his pajamas, his cuffs stained with blood.
Wang Dongyang whispered something in his ear, and he turned his face, looking at her blankly and vacantly. Her cold eyes were frightening. Looking at her, it wasn’t like he was looking at a person, but at an unfamiliar object.
If she didn’t feel a chill down her spine, it was because she was looking at her with such a cold and unforgiving gaze that she felt hatred for her and her family. But what about Wei?
She didn’t dare to think about it.
But that day in the hospital, when she saw them pass each other like strangers, she felt sorry for Wei again. In fact, deep down, she always believed that Ruan Shaonan loved Wei.
“Have you ever thought about it? If he doesn’t love you at all, it’s useless for you to do anything. If he really loves you, the kind of blow you dealt him like that would be fatal. You didn’t see the look in his eyes that day at the hospital, so desperate it was as if he had lost the whole world. You just cut things off like that, leaving him no chance and no chance for yourself? What were you thinking?”
Wei Xi’s hand trembled, and she made another mistake. It seemed that she couldn’t continue painting today. She simply put down the painting board and looked at the little bit of sunset light between the buildings in the distance. ’So what do you think I should do? Tell him how much I love him? And then let him keep the daughter of his enemy by his side, face to face every day, night after night? He will never forget who I am, who’s blood runs through my veins. It has nothing to do with whether I’m innocent or not, or what my relationship with the Lu family is like. But whenever he looks at me, he will be reminded of that unspeakable past. He will be torn between conflicting emotions, and lose control. I’ve already tried this more than once.’
She lowered her head, looked at her left hand covered in gauze, and smiled sadly, ‘He might not even be able to tell whether he loves me more or hates me more.’
Ruixi sighed, took out a cigarette, and rubbed his forehead. ‘So that’s it between you?’
‘What else can it be?’ Wei Xi hugged her knees and curled up in a chair, ‘I know, you must think I’ve done something wrong. You can call me selfish, call me pretentious, call me self-righteous and my own worst enemy. I don’t care, because that’s how I see myself too. But, Ruifei, think about it: for people like us, what do we have left in this world besides ourselves? I really can’t afford to lose you. I can’t stand his threats anymore, his whims, his constant availability. To be called upon like this every day by the person you love, it’s…harder than getting slapped in the face.’
Wei Xi buried her face in her knees, as if she was deep in thought, except that she was just silently smoking. After a while, she let out a sigh and said, ‘Wei Xi, I didn’t study as much as you. You and he are both accomplished people, I’m not as astute or worldly-wise as you, and I can’t think as far ahead as you. But I feel that love is not about addition, subtraction, multiplication or division, so why bother with so much? He likes you, and you love him, isn’t that enough for you to be together? Besides…’ Ruifeng paused for a moment, “he can give you far more than anyone else. Are you really not interested at all?”
Weixi raised her face and looked at the bustling city under the half-setting sun, murmuring softly, ’This city is really beautiful. Some people stand at the top of the crowd, admired by everyone, and can get whatever they want with just a wave of their hand. Some people are like ants wandering around the city, working hard just to have enough to eat and wear. Yes, power, money, and status, who wouldn’t want to stand in the midst of all that glory? I want it too. I even feel a little smug when I feel that he might be avenging me. But if not, this city has taken so much from us, and along the way, we have lost our dignity. In order to survive, we greet and serve these so-called celebrities with a smile every day. If we are bullied, we don’t even dare to cry out loud. No one knows better than us how the poor are humiliated and trampled on as victims in this city. But…’
Wei Xi paused for a moment, suddenly choking up, ‘This doesn’t mean that I have to live under the watchful eye of a man, carrying an unwanted surname, an embarrassing identity, every day trying to read his mind and living in fear of his every glance. It is precisely because I love him that I cannot do this. I cannot let this relationship cast the slightest shadow. I want to be able to think of him and always feel gratitude and love, not pain and suspicion. So, I will let go decisively now, and this is the last dignity I will leave myself… ‘
If she hadn’t looked at Weixi, whose eyes were red, she would have thought she was going to cry. But who knew, all she saw was a face without a ripple. If she hadn’t felt sorry for her, the more she did, the more she would have felt sorry for her.
Suddenly the wind picked up. Ru Fei stubbed out her cigarette and put her arm around Weixi’s shoulders. ’Now he’s already treated you like a stranger, you should be content, right?’
Wei Xi gave a forlorn smile. ‘Ruifei, can you believe it? For the past seven years, every morning when I opened my eyes, I had to tell myself that I had to like him less, that if I did that, it would be easier, right? I kept reminding myself like that. But when I saw him in the hospital that day, I couldn’t help it. The moment I passed him by, I finally understood what it meant to have a heart cut open. But there’s nothing in this world that you can’t get back. I’m not content, I just… I don’t know what to do anymore.’
That night, when the sunset dyed the last part of the sky red, Weixi still cried. She hugged her knees, and for the first time, without holding back or suppressing her emotions, she let herself cry until she could no longer sob.
If he hadn’t held her close, with her clear eyes fixed on the darkening sky, her heart would have been even more heavy than the ink. He wanted to comfort her, but where to begin with the thousand words?
Whether or not this outcome was in line with everyone’s ideals, the good thing was that it was all over.
After that, Ruan Shaonan really never looked for Wei Xi again, not even once.
However, there were still some small issues between them that had not been cleared up. For example, the hospital bill was paid by his assistant, Wang Dongyang, as well as the expensive mobile phone.
Wei Xi remitted the hospital bill to his company and used a same-city courier for the mobile phone. She didn’t want to owe him anything, and didn’t want him to think it was an excuse for her to get close, so she put Wang Dongyang’s name on it. Then, not long after, Wei Xi received a package, and when she opened it, it was her mother’s urn.
At that moment, Weixi didn’t think anything, and her mind was almost empty. This was a skill she had developed since she had reunited with Ruan Shaonan. She would do this when she sensed that she might not be able to bear the pain.
She had returned everything to him, and he had returned everything to her. As she had wished, from then on, they were forever separated, and they forgot about each other.
She knew that he had told her this with his actions.
Wei Xi could not afford a grave, and did not want to send the ashes back to the Lu family cemetery, so she kept them at home and offered three sticks of incense every morning and evening to appease her mother’s spirit in heaven. Her life with Ru Fei returned to its former calm. Ru Fei continued to sleep during the day and work at night, trying to save money. Wei Xi’s final exams were approaching, so she focused all her energy on her studies.
They don’t rely on the heavens, the earth, or men. But she has to rely on herself to get out of the current predicament.
At this time, there was exciting news from the university: the Royal College of Art in the UK hoped to establish academic exchanges with Weixi’s university. The specific format would be academic seminars and the exchange of works, as well as the mutual dispatch of exchange students for one year.
“This is a great opportunity, it will save money and broaden your horizons,’ Zhou Xiaofan, munching on a mouthful of fragrant braised pork at lunch, hit the nail on the head.
‘How could it be that easy? There’s only one place, and the school will definitely choose the best. I’m afraid we’ll just have to watch.’ Wei Xi didn’t think so.
‘I wouldn’t dare to think about it, but you can, Wei Xi. You’ve won so many awards and your grades have always been so good, so you might as well give it a try,’ Zhou Xiaofan said casually.
When she said that, Weixi was really tempted. After all, being able to further her studies at the Royal College of Art was something every student dreamed of. And the fact that she would be able to leave for a year was something she had always dreamed of.
She asked the head of the department about the application details and was a little shocked to hear that not only were the theoretical basis and work requirements extremely high, but there were also a lot of applicants, including many young heroes.
However, Wuxi was not deterred and, with a ‘let’s give it a try’ mentality, she began preparing without thinking too much about it.
Time always passes quickly when you are studying hard. After New Year’s Day, the school was about to go on holiday, but she wanted to pass the assessment exam a few days later, so every day she carried a stack of books and buried herself in the school library.
If she wasn’t laughing, she would have become a complete bookworm. But she just loved this kind of life, peaceful and secure, and she could have continued like this until she died.
Ruan Shaonan is still the focus of attention, frequently making headlines in major and minor newspapers and appearing on the covers of various financial and gossip magazines. His every move and every smile is the topic of conversation, especially among young girls. He is young, rich, handsome, single, and charming; an outstanding businessman and philanthropist dedicated to public welfare. All of this seems to them to be full of endless reverie and fatal allure.
Zhou Xiaofan has more than once pointed at a series of numbers in the newspaper and said enviously, ‘Look at how many zeros there are. He is so generous even with one donation. How much wealth does he have?’
Someone next to her poured cold water on her, ‘It’s none of our business how much wealth he has. A man like that would want to marry a rich girl, and I bet even his mistress is a celebrity. Haven’t you heard? He’s been getting really close to one of the “granddaughter-in-laws” lately.’
Zhou Xiaofan pursed her lips and gnawed on her straw. ‘I heard about it. It’s Gu Yongling, the daughter of the Singaporean Fu Huang Group. I heard that her family is incredibly wealthy, with several private jets alone.’
‘So if they get married, they’ll be a powerful duo. Taihuang Group is fighting an acquisition battle with Ruan Shaonan, so won’t they die even faster?’ a classmate wailed.
Zhou Xiaofan looked at her in admiration. ‘You know about financial business battles?’
‘How would I know? It’s my father, who sits in the stock exchange every day, who goes on about this every day. He still has a lot of Thai Huang shares, and I’ve told him to sell, but he won’t listen. Now they’re almost at rock bottom.‘
’Your family is lucky. Didn’t you hear that a while ago someone lost everything and jumped off the securities building? These financial predators are in control, but in the end it’s the small investors who suffer, isn’t it?’
Everyone sighed, and Weixi, sitting on the side, sighed too. She had wanted to have an afternoon tea with everyone and relax a little. She hadn’t expected that the more she didn’t want to hear about something, the more everyone talked about it.
‘By the way, Weixi, are you going to Lijiang or not? Everyone is paying already,’ Zhou Xiaofan nudged her with her elbow.
“I’m not going. It costs 5,000 yuan per person, which is too expensive,’
A classmate shouted, ‘It’s not expensive. With the current prices, what can you buy for 5,000 yuan? Besides, it’s so beautiful there, it’s still worth it.’
Wei Xi could only smile and shake her head. 5,000 yuan was more than half a year’s expenses for her and Ru Fei. Ruan Shaonan once said that she and he had different concepts of ‘expensive.’ Compared to these carefree classmates, her concept of money would never be the same.
They would never understand her precarious life.
‘By the way, Weixi, when I went to Professor Xu’s office today, I heard several professors from the department talking about you,‘ said a girl with a round face.
Weixi felt strange, “Why were they talking about me?”
’It seems that your last work was very much appreciated by the people at the Royal Academy of Fine Arts. They said that you are very good at using colour, and that the simple colour contrast gives the oil painting a kind of tenacious vitality. They also said that, when they saw that painting, they would never have imagined that the artist was in her early twenties and a girl to boot. You’re going to become famous now. The Royal Academy of Fine Arts is full of experts, and those people have discerning eyes. Now that they’ve taken an interest in your work, I think the place is yours for sure.”
Upon hearing this, Zhou Xiaofan slapped Wei Xi on the shoulder and said excitedly, ’Well done, Wei Xi! I always knew you had talent, but I never imagined it would be this good. Tell me, since you’re so happy, should you buy us a treat?’
The other girls joined in the commotion, after all, she had brought glory to the department, and everyone was very happy for her. Wei Xi was also very excited, but she didn’t dare to be too happy just yet.
‘Don’t rush to kill me just yet, there’s still a written exam in a few days, we don’t know if it’ll work yet!’
Zhou Xiaofan said nonchalantly, ‘In our major, it’s better to be able to draw than to be able to speak eloquently. The written exam is just a formality, as long as you pass the main part, the place will be yours.’
As it turned out, things really did turn out just as Zhou Xiaofan had said. The next day, the department head summoned Wei Xi and told her more or less the same thing. He told her to prepare well for the theoretical exam in a few days, and as long as her results weren’t too bad, she would have a very good chance of getting the opportunity.
Wei Xi really couldn’t describe her feelings, because it was just too good, and she didn’t quite believe it was real.
On the way home, she bought her and Ru Fei’s favourite chestnut cake to celebrate with her. When she reached the door, she was very surprised to see a familiar figure hanging around.
‘CoCo?’
CoCo turned around and gave a soft smile, ‘Weixi, I came to say goodbye.’
Ruifei opened a can of beer for her, but CoCo waved her hand, ‘No more drinking. I drank too much the other day and now I’m nursing my stomach with congee and vegetables.’
‘You’re just going to leave like that? That Chen guy is going to let you go?’ Ruifei put the beer aside and poured her a cup of tea.
‘He told me to go, and gave me some money to go as far away as I could.’
Ruifei was a little surprised, ‘That animal not only let you go, but also gave you money? How is that possible?’
CoCo said, ‘I also found it strange, but he seemed very scared at the time, saying something about me not to harm him anymore, and that he could not be bothered with me but could hide from me. I was baffled. But anyway, the money he gave me is enough if I save it carefully.’
Ruifei glanced at Weixi, who was also looking at her. Neither of them said anything.
‘Leaving on your own?’ Weixi asked.
CoCo smiled, ‘Who else? I don’t want to blame anyone. After all I’ve been through, I’ve seen it all. Right now, I feel like I’ve been reborn, and I just want to leave here and start a new life.’
‘When are you leaving? We’ll come and see you off,’ Ru Fei said.
CoCo shook her head, ‘No, I’m afraid if you come to see me off, the scene… I won’t be able to bear it. I came here alone, and it’s better if I go alone now, without any attachments, clean and clear.’
That afternoon, when CoCo left, it was dusk, and the whole street was bathed in the golden light of the setting sun.
Ru Fei and Wei Xi saw her off downstairs. As friends, they were a little sad to think that they might not see each other again.
As they parted, CoCo hugged Wei Xi and whispered in her ear, ‘Wei Xi, actually…that Chen wanted me to tell you that he has already finished the task that Ruan Shaonan asked him to do. I don’t know what your relationship with Ruan Shaonan is, and I don’t want to know. But Wei Xi, I know that you saved me. Thank you, I will remember for the rest of my life, everything you have done for me. I will be grateful for the rest of my life, and I will cherish myself, just as you cherish me…’
When she was listening to her just now, Wei Xi already had a pretty good idea of what was going on. She just didn’t expect that her unintentional words could help her escape from her predicament.
She smiled, gently embraced the poor girl, and said sadly in her ear, ‘Coco, actually I’ve always wanted to tell you that being hurt is never an excuse for falling. The more unloved we are, the more we have to love ourselves. We are all people who cannot choose our own future, but whenever there is a chance, we should not give up easily, even if we have to fight for it with our lives. There are too many things in this world that are not up to us. The only thing that is ours is our body, so you must remember to cherish it… There will always be regrets in life, and what we should learn is not to let regrets last longer than life.”
Chapter 17: A bolt from the blue
These days, there has been a nagging thought in Weixi’s mind: what would happen to her if one day, the world suddenly lost Ruan Shaonan? Would she be happier or more miserable?
Would she fall in love with another man? What kind of man would he be? An ordinary white-collar worker? Or a romantic artist?
What kind of life would they have? Would they be two people crammed into a tiny apartment, having a beautiful child? Or would they go travelling together in pursuit of an unattainable artistic dream?
However, no matter what kind of person she meets and what kind of life she leads, Wei-Xi knows that a part of her life has already rotted forever. Even if the whole world is in spring, they are like dried leaves, never to be rejuvenated.
The final exam is over, and today is the day of the written exam for studying abroad. The exam is scheduled for 2 pm, and it is said that the questions are all set by experts from the Royal Academy of Fine Arts. Everyone is gearing up for the exam, not daring to take it lightly.
Wei Xi studied in the library in the morning and had lunch at the school cafeteria. As the holiday approached, there were fewer people eating in the cafeteria. Wei Xi found a quiet corner and ate mouthfuls of the not-quite-authentic Yangzhou fried rice, reluctant to put down her books.
She suddenly felt that there was something wrong with the atmosphere around her, as if there were many pairs of eyes in the cafeteria staring at her at the same time.
She looked up and found the source of the problem.
Ling Luochuan, this person seems to be able to bring a whirlwind wherever he goes, big or small, depending on his mood.
He stood opposite her, smiling very gentlemanly, ‘Do you mind if I sit down?’
Could she say no?
Wei Xi looked around. Some classmates were sizing them up while whispering to each other, probably having recognised him. You have to understand, his exposure rate, Ling Luochuan, is no less than that of Ruan Shaonan, especially the gossip.
The stares from her classmates were already making her feel uneasy, and Ling Luochuan’s blatant disregard for her, sitting right across from her, made her feel like she was sitting on pins and needles. Wei Xi’s hand holding the spoon was sweating, her body stiff and straight, and she had the urge to escape.
Ling Luochuan seemed to have seen her intention, and spoke to her with a smile, his tone gentle, ‘You’d better sit quietly, otherwise, I guarantee you’ll be ten times more uncomfortable than you are now.’
Wei Xi looked at him in surprise. She really couldn’t understand how someone so handsome and decent could always look like the devil when he smiled.
She looked at him helplessly and said, ‘Mr. Ling, I don’t know what I’ve done to upset you, but I really have something very important to do today. Even if you want to teach me a lesson, can we do it some other time?’
The man laughed lightly, picked up the juice Wei Xi had put on the table and took a sip. It tasted terrible, as he frowned and put it back down.
‘You don’t need to be scared like this. I promised Shao Nan that I wouldn’t touch you, and I definitely won’t. Today, I just came to see you and satisfy my curiosity.”
While he was talking, he was sizing her up, his eyes extremely vicious. ’Lu Weixi, I really underestimated you before. I never thought that Lu Zixu would have an outcast daughter like you. I’m truly sorry.’
Hearing the meanness in his words, Weixi was a little shocked and hurriedly explained, ‘I have long since had no relationship with the Lu family, and I presume Mr. Ling should know this.’
Ling Luochuan laughed, ‘Of course I know, which is why I find it strange. You left the Lu family so long ago, yet how is it that you have learned the Lu family’s skill at tormenting people so perfectly? Could it be that blood is indeed thicker than water, and like father, like daughter? Or is this the nature of your Lu family, so you simply can’t change your nature even if the country and the world change?‘
Wei Xi was stunned by his taunts, “Mr. Ling, I don’t understand what you mean.”
’Don’t understand? No way, what did Miss Lu do that day, and you’ve already forgotten so quickly?‘
So it was about what happened that night.
’Mr. Ling, no matter who is right and who is wrong between him and me, in the end, this is also our business.’
In other words, is he, the young master, meddling in other people’s business too much?
Ling Luochuan sneered, ‘If it weren’t for Shao Nan, who has given up the company and the revenge for you, and drinks like a fish every day, looking half dead, do you think I want to get involved?’
Wei Xi’s mind went blank. Ruan Shao Nan was not considered to be an emotional person. He had always been calm, objective, stable and self-controlled, so why would he act so impulsively?
‘You don’t believe me?’ Ling Luochuan’s hawk-like eyes fixed on her. ’I really feel sorry for Shaonan. He’s done everything for you, but you can’t even give him the most basic trust. Miss Lu, may I ask you, is Shaonan really that evil to you?’
The written test was almost over, and the students in the cafeteria were leaving with their trays.
Wei Xi was a little anxious, tightened her throat and said, ‘Mr. Ling, if you came here today to see the Lu family’s abandoned daughter, I believe you are satisfied. If you still want to discuss his character with me, can we do it another time? I really have something to do today, I’m sorry.’
She was about to stand up…
‘Sit down!’ The man across from her snapped, ‘I’m not done talking.’
Wei Xi could only sit back resentfully, while Ling Luochuan pursed his lips and looked away in disdain. ‘He was a good person, but you turned him into that. You’re really indifferent. Shao Nan was right, you really don’t care about him at all. No matter what he does, no matter how he makes amends, you only remember the bad things about him, only remember that he forced you and threatened you. Lu Weixi, if you really don’t like it, you can sue him, no one is stopping you. But you can’t just hang on to him like this, neither dead nor alive. Even if you have grievances in your heart, killing someone is going too far. What you did to him was too much, wasn’t it?’
His words were like a howitzer shell, and after being bombarded by him, Wenxi’s face turned red and then white. It seems that these two are really good brothers who can talk about anything, even such intimate matters. In that case, she also decided to go all out.
“Mr Ling, it seems that you know very well what happened between us. Then I also want to tell you that if I were as powerful as you, no, even if I were one-tenth, one-hundredth, or even one-thousandth as powerful as you, I would not have humiliated myself like this. I know that kind of thing is nothing in the eyes of a rich playboy like you. So I don’t want to say that I’ve been wronged. Because I know very well that our pitiful wishes are worthless in the hearts of people like you, who call the shots. I can only say that I never imagined how much damage I could do, and that he would end up like this…’ She bit her lip, ’It really wasn’t my intention. But I really can’t help it, I can’t satisfy his demands. Besides, Mr Ling, he has already let me off the hook, so why do you have to be a villain for no reason? It’s pointless.”
The man looked at her intently, with a searching gaze, as if studying something, then laughed contemptuously, “It is indeed pointless. Because I have only just realised today what a hypocritical woman you are.”
He suddenly stood up and leaned over her ear. This position was very intimate, and from the outside it looked like lovers whispering intimately.
‘Do you know what Shao Nan said to me the other day when he was drunk? He asked me what it meant if an innocent girl allowed a man to enter her body. And what if an innocent girl held onto that man the whole time she did it?”
Wei Xi’s expression hardened. The man laughed lightly. ’I don’t know about you, but for a man, it means that I like you. You’re right, we’re both despicable people. And what are you? A hypocritical coward! Shao Nan is unscrupulous, but he has the courage to love. But what about you? What are you? You don’t even have the courage to admit it. Don’t think you’re hiding it well, I can see through your little tricks in an instant.”
Wei Xi stared at him with wide eyes, but the man was unruffled, his hand cupping her side of her face. ’But you’re right about one thing. There is no real democracy between you and us. Who do you think you are? If Shounan hadn’t always protected you, would you still be sitting in such a beautiful school, playing the role of the good student? If it had been up to me, you would have been gone long ago! You don’t have to be grateful, but you should be glad. Be glad that there is such a fool as him, who can call the shots, who has always protected you behind the scenes.
He pushed her away and took out a note from his pocket, waving it in front of her eyes. ‘I came here today to give you this. It’s the address of the hospital. Shounan is in the hospital. The doctor said it’s advanced bone cancer, and the cancer cells have already entered his brain. He’s been in a lot of pain at night these past few days. I wanted you to go see him, but…’ He tore the note in half. “Forget it. Like you said, it’s pointless.”
The two pieces of paper floated to the ground. Weixi looked at them blankly for a long time before suddenly understanding. She looked up suddenly, ’What did you say?’
He looked into her eyes and said, word for word, ‘I said terminal bone cancer. The doctor said he has at most two months to live. Congratulations, you’ve finally got what you wanted. You should be happy now. Don’t you hate him, detest him, and want to never see him again? Don’t worry, you won’t have to see him again soon. Once he’s dead, he’ll never bother you again. You’ll have gotten your revenge, and the Luk family should raise a glass to celebrate! Do you know why he got this disease? The doctor said that 80% of the time, it is a tumour caused by chronic infection that has not been treated in time after a previous fracture. Everyone in your family, especially Lu Zixu, deserves to be tortured a thousand times!”
Wei Xi looked at him in horror, but the man’s expression was cold and terrifying. ’You should now understand why Shao Nan is so eager to succeed, both with you and with the Lu family. Because he has no time! He has no time for you to get to know him and accept him slowly. You don’t know what kind of life he led in the United States, and you don’t know what he sacrificed to achieve what he has today. But you should know who took everything away from him so easily. It was like that in the past, and it’s still like that now. Who is really being unreasonable?‘
Weiwei looked at him blankly, unable to say a word. Ling Luochuan, however, was unwilling to let her off so easily.
’Lu Weiwei, ask yourself, from the beginning to the present, has Shounan ever really hurt you? He thinks about you in everything, even when he is sick, he keeps you in his thoughts. You frown, and even your chaotic friends benefit. You are really something! I now understand that you are better than everyone else, and without even having to make an effort, or even having to ask, you can make a man work hard for you until he dies. But I really don’t understand, how can a man like you, who is so ruthless and selfish, still be so devoted to you?’ He laughed contemptuously, “But there’s really no point in talking about this now.”
He patted her face, and his cold breath blew in her ear, ’I wish you success in your studies! You must live on. Because every day you live, you will remember what you have missed out on in this life.’
Ling Luochuan left, throwing a bolt of lightning at her, blowing her to powder, and walking away alone.
Wei Xi suddenly felt a little overwhelmed, not knowing what she should do.
Right, she should go take her exam first!
She grabbed her books and left, but then suddenly remembered that she hadn’t returned the tray. She turned back to pick up the tray, but then thought that she should pick up the two pieces of paper first. But somehow she couldn’t hold onto them properly, and the soup and rice, and the juice glasses, splattered all over the floor.
Everyone in the dining room was looking at her, so she quickly crouched down to clean up. Her hands were moving around aimlessly, and the broken pieces of the glass pricked her fingers, and blood came out. She raised her hands and looked at them in a daze, watching the blood gush out of the wound and flow along her fingers to her palms.
Her hands were full of blood, and her eyes were full of red, and only then did she feel fear.
It hurts! It hurts like hell! It hurts so much that it tears your insides out and twists them into knots.
She sits down on the floor, feeling nothing but pain. Her chest hurts as if it’s going to explode. She knows it’s time, she should get ready for the exam. But she doesn’t want to do anything right now, she just wants to find the torn piece of paper, as if that would make everything that’s irreparable recoverable.
She got down on her knees and groped around, but her eyes were blurred and she couldn’t see anything. Everything was a blur before her eyes. She had blood-stained hands and scratched the ground randomly, as if someone was pulling her, as if a familiar classmate was calling her name. She burst into tears, first softly, then loudly.
She knew she was finished. The world was dead, and it no longer meant anything to her.
What was the point of exams? What was the point of studying abroad? What was the point of her if the world was without him?
Her classmates must have been terrified by her, so reckless and irrational like a madwoman. When they took her to the infirmary, she was still clutching the two pieces of paper in her hands, but they were soaked in blood.
The school nurse gave her a sedative and she finally calmed down. She lay on the bed, her body felt like it was falling apart, and all she felt was pain. Her hands, her heart, her whole body, it hurt so much it felt like her heart would rip in two. But she couldn’t cry anymore.
The medicine kicked in, and she became dazed. She just lay there, looking at the distorted ceiling of the infirmary, and faintly heard the doctor say to the classmate who brought her in that she might have fear of blood, which would explain her abnormal behaviour.
Unconsciously, she fell asleep and sank into a dark ocean.
When she opened her eyes again, it was already 3:00 p.m. The school nurse was not there, and her hand was wrapped in thick gauze and already bandaged.
She silently stared for a while, and when she saw the bright red note on the table, memories of the past returned.
She did not shed any more tears, put on her shoes, picked up the note on the table, and left the infirmary.
Chapter 18: A living sacrifice
When Chi Mo picked up Wei Xi on the street, she was wandering the streets like a ghost. At first, Chi Mo thought he had seen her wrong. At this time of day, shouldn’t Wei Xi be studying for an exam?
It wasn’t until she stopped at the bus stop and looked up, confused, at the bus stop sign, that Chi Mo was sure it was her.
Chi Mo parked his motorcycle by the roadside, got off and pulled her by the arm. ‘Weixi, don’t you have an exam? What are you doing standing here?’
Weixi looked at him stupidly, and after a minute recognised who he was. Her tears fell like rain, and she stammered, ‘Can you take me to Xishan… I can’t find the bus there… taxis are too expensive, I… I don’t have that much money on me.’
Sifang Temple, West Hill. This is the holiest and quietest place in the city, with faint chanting and secluded paths.
Legend has it that there are a total of 999 steps from top to bottom in this temple.
Legend has it that as long as the worshippers can complete these steps with one step and one bow, their wishes will come true.
Wei Xi stood in front of the moss-covered steps, looking up at the ancient temple in the distance.
She never believed in ghosts and gods, but at this moment, she would kneel to the heavens full of gods and Buddhas for him. She never prayed for wishes, but at this moment, she would bow her head for him with every step…
Ruifei had not cooked a pot of ginger soup and brought a bowl to Chi Mo. Then she touched Weixi’s forehead. She was burning up, lying in bed dazed, her face flushed like a familiar apple.
‘She’s being silly, and you’re letting her? There are 999 steps, and it’s snowing outside. She’s in such poor health, aren’t you afraid she’ll die on those steps? What were you thinking?‘ Ruifei looked at the man beside her reproachfully.
Chi Mo looked at the ginger soup in his hands and said slowly, “You know her temper. She was in so much pain that she had no choice but to let it out, and she calmed down. Otherwise… I don’t know what would have happened.”
’What about her exam?’
Chi Mo shook his head, ‘I guess she didn’t take it.’
Ru Fei didn’t know what to say. She had seen for herself how hard Wei Xi had prepared for that exam. Her work had been recognised, and if she could just get through this, the place in a foreign country would be hers. But the heavens were against her.
Ru Fei tried Wei Xi’s temperature again, still not feeling at ease, ‘I’ll go buy her some more fever medicine, you keep an eye on her for me.’
If not, he put on his jacket and went out, leaving Chi Mo alone with the sleeping Wei Xi.
Wei Xi slept very peacefully and quietly, probably really tired. The room was very quiet, and her soft breathing could be heard, like that of some kind of sleeping animal.
It was very late at night, and Chi Mo looked at her helplessly. He really couldn’t understand how she could trust him so much every time, without any reservations. Didn’t she know what kind of temptation this was for him?
He sat by the bed and gently touched her sleeping face. He recalled the afternoon in his mind, remembering how she had climbed the 900-odd steps, one step at a time, on her knees, and then knelt and bowed again and again.
It was snowing, and the mountain wind was cold and gloomy. He saw her teeth chattering. Her forehead was cut, her hands were covered in blood and bandages, her face was covered in mud, her body was soaked in snow and water, and she was a terrible sight. But she kept going, with a resolute and determined look, not flinching at all.
‘Does she really love him that much?’ Chi Mo sighed softly, ‘Does she really love him that much that she doesn’t even want to live anymore?’
When they were going down the mountain, Wei Xi could no longer walk a single step. Without saying a word, he picked her up on his back.
The road was slippery after the snow, and he accompanied her on her knees all the way to the top of the mountain. He was exhausted himself, but he held on, being careful not to fall.
The wind in the mountains was still very cold, and their clothes, which had not dried, blew against their bodies and penetrated to the bone. However, the parts of their bodies that were pressed together were very warm.
Wei Xi lay on his back, her face pressed against his shoulder, and said to him, ‘Chi Mo, if one day I’m gone, please take care of Ru Fei.’
The memories came to an abrupt end here, and Chi Mo’s body stiffened. He gazed intently at the sleeping person in the bed, leaned over and whispered in her ear, repeating what he had said to her on the mountain, as if he wanted to engrave it in her heart.
‘Don’t give her to me, she’s not my responsibility. If you’re gone, no matter who’s by her side, she won’t be able to live well. Weixi, you have to live well, we all have to live well. You have to remember, for people like us, survival itself… is a kind of victory.’
Weixi woke up at dawn. Her fever had subsided, but her bones felt like they were about to fall apart. She saw Ruifei lying on his back in front of her bed, still fast asleep. Weixi caught a whiff of faint tobacco smoke, but it wasn’t the kind Ruifei usually smoked.
She found a Marlboro butt in the ashtray, which must have been left by Chi Mo. Only he had a soft spot for that brand, and Ruifei didn’t smoke anything but Mild Seven.
Thinking about Chi Mo, Wei Xi felt a little bit sorry for him. She had temporarily enlisted his help, not only accompanying her all the way to the top of the mountain, but also carrying her for so long.
Although he never admitted it, Wei Xi felt that he was actually a trustworthy man. Although he occasionally said things that made people feel cold, he was much more honest than Mark.
Next time she saw him, she must say a proper ‘thank you’ to him. But for now, she had other things to do.
Yuen Shaonan lives in a private hospital not far from the city centre, but in a quiet prime location with a peaceful environment. Not knowing what to bring when visiting a patient, Wei Xi simply didn’t bring anything, and with a nervous heart, she stood at the door of the ward.
She thought she would meet many people visiting the sick here, after all, his status had long since changed. However, it was surprisingly quiet.
She knocked gently on the door, but after a while no one answered. The door was ajar, so she simply pushed it open and walked in.
She really didn’t expect to find him sleeping alone in the hospital room. Sunlight shone through the gaps in the blinds, leaving streaks of shadows on his face.
She felt her nose tingle. The room was filled with fruit baskets and flowers, and the sweet aroma was refreshing. She was about to walk over…
“Excuse me, who are you?’
Wei Xi was surprised to find someone else in the room. She froze for a moment, then turned around and, thanks to Zhou Xiaofan’s gossip magazines, quickly recognised the other person.
Gu Yongling, the daughter of the Fu Huang Group. She had to say, she was even more beautiful in person than in her photos, with bright eyes and white teeth, a classic beauty with an air of elegance.
‘I’m Gu Yongling. Are you a friend of Shao Nan?’ The beauty saw that she wasn’t answering and very gracefully introduced herself, smiling slightly. She was really pretty.
‘I…‘ Wei Xi felt embarrassed. How should she introduce herself?
Before she could answer, the person in the bed stirred. Gu Yongling smiled apologetically at her, put down the vase in her hands, walked over to the window and opened the blinds. The sun shone in.
’Yongling?’ Ruan Shaonan asked in a low voice, his gentle tone still carrying a sleepy nasal sound.
The beauty helped him up and asked, ‘Are you feeling better today? The doctor said you shouldn’t eat anything too greasy. I’ve made some congee for you. Do you want to eat now?’
Ruan Shaonan shook his head, ‘Maybe later.’ Then he turned his face, only to discover Wei Xi, who had been standing in the corner the whole time.
His face immediately fell, and he narrowed his eyes slightly, as if this would make her clearer to him. ‘It’s you?’
His distant indifference made Wei Xi shrink. And Gu Yongling’s questioning gaze made her feel even more embarrassed. She subconsciously tugged at her skirt, forcing herself to face this awkward situation.
She was to blame for everything that had happened today, so it was no wonder that others were blaming her. She had cruelly and decisively cut everything off, so how could she expect him to keep waiting there?
She was about to say something when Gu Yongling spoke before she could, ‘Shao Nan, is this lady your friend?’
Ruan Shao Nan didn’t look at her again, but smiled at Gu Yongling, ‘We’re not friends, but I was her first man, and we’re not lovers. How should I describe our relationship?’ He glanced at her out of the corner of his eye and mocked, ‘According to you, Miss Lu, you were just a little distraction for me to pass the time. Isn’t that right?’
This was like a blow to the head, and she almost couldn’t stand. She never expected him to say such unpleasant things in front of another woman.
Ruan Shaonan looked white with anger, but he became even more aggressive, ‘Isn’t that right? Miss Lu, do you have a new explanation?’
Wei Xi opened her eyes wide and tried hard to hold back her tears. She still had a lot to say to him, and no matter how embarrassing it was, she couldn’t just run away.
Ruan Shaonan, however, was a little impatient, ‘Miss Lu, you’re not here to stand in the penalty box, are you? If you don’t have anything to say, please leave and let us be in peace.’
Wei Xi straightened up and looked intently at the man she loved through the fine dust in the sunlight.
She finally gathered her courage and said, ‘I came here today to tell you that I’m sorry. That night, I lied to you. In fact…’ She took a deep breath and said, ‘I love you. For the past seven years, I’ve been in love with you.’
Ruan Shaonan was stunned, and Gu Yongling was also full of surprise.
The air in the room instantly froze, but Ruan Shaonan sneered, ‘Lu Weixi, do you know what you’re doing? You’ve come here now and said this to our faces. Don’t you think you’re ridiculous?’
Weixi looked at the man’s mocking eyes and smiled sadly, ‘No, it’s not ridiculous at all. If you knew what kind of heart I’ve had for loving you for the past seven years, you wouldn’t find it ridiculous…’
Wei Xi’s eyes drifted away, across the long, bitter passage of time, back to the yellowed, unattainable past.
How she longed to tell him, without anyone else around, about the seven years of waiting, about all her love. Her voice must be very, very low, as if it were about to sink into the dust. It must be in the softest of tones, with the most sincere expression, her eyes sparkling with tears. That would surely be the most moving melody in the world.
However, she could not do it. No matter how hard she tried, she could not. In the face of his relentless questioning and ridicule, she could only hold her white-knuckled hands together, unable to say a word.
He had become such a cold man, treating her with nothing but contempt. He already had such an outstanding woman by his side, and compared to her, she was like an old piece of clothing that was no longer wearable.
So what was the point of saying all this now?
At the thought of this, Weixi’s tears almost welled up. But in the end, she didn’t cry, just smiled embarrassedly, which was even more unbecoming than crying.
‘I know, it’s useless for me to say anything now. But please believe…’ Weixi raised her eyes, as if she wanted to look straight into his heart, ‘I love you, even if there are so many women around you, but absolutely no woman will love you like I do. It was like this in the past, it is like this now, and every day in the future… it will also be like this.’
She had finally finished speaking, and before he could react, she bowed slightly and left. Those were just a few words, but they had already exhausted the strength of her entire life. She was shaking all over, and she no longer had the energy to carry on.
She walked quickly and hurriedly, admitting to herself that she was afraid, afraid that after doing her best, all she would get in return was his ridicule. But wasn’t that how life was? Better to regret than to have regrets.
The corridor in the high-class ward was long and winding. Wei-xi walked quickly, almost running, towards the exit when she was suddenly stopped by a strong hand on her arm.
She turned around in panic, only to come face to face with a pair of angry eyes that seemed to be about to burst into flames.
“Lu Wei-xi, you’re really something. You’re really good at messing with people’s hearts and then walking away, aren’t you?’
Wei Xi didn’t understand what he meant at first, and he didn’t need her to understand, dragging her back to the ward. Gu Yongling left at some point, and after he came in, he slammed the door and locked it.
Wei Xi’s head was still a little dizzy when he carried her to the bed. She wanted to think about things, like, why did Gu Yongling just leave? Like, they hadn’t made up, so why were they suddenly so intimate? For example, he was still sick, but how could a sick person have so much strength?
Before the fourth doubt could come up, the man on top of her didn’t have any more time for her. He tore off her clothes, and his kisses and fingers carried an overbearing air, as if they wanted to sweep away all her reason.
He called her name softly, and each plunge was exuberant and powerful. She wrapped her legs around his waist, catering to his rhythm, as if offering a living, breathing sacrifice.
It was an irresistible beauty, a taste for which could lead to destruction. She didn’t know when she started to cry, and he noticed, but he held her even tighter. Her tears were hot, and her body was soft like a pool of spring water, arousing his infinite pity, but he couldn’t stop, just indulging more and more.
He kissed away her tears and murmured in her ear, probably trying to comfort her again. A scent similar to happiness filled the air as their ears rubbed together, but it was so desperate…
Wei Xi couldn’t hear what he was saying, her heart sinking into endless sadness. Her tears flowed incessantly, trickling down the corners of her eyes and onto the white pillowcase, as if falling into his deep, dark heart.
Why is it that people always have to wait until it’s too late before they know they can’t be together?
Wei Xi hugged him tightly, and it was only at this moment, when they were naked together, that she realised how much he had lost weight. Her tears flowed in streams, but she didn’t know where they should go.
What must be done to stop feeling so desperate even when loving?
The morning sun was beautiful, quietly shining down on the world. People under the sun continued to go about their own business, going in one direction or another, without asking why or needing to be awake.
It was a chaotic state, but one that had the luck of sticking to rules.
The world called it fate.
Chapter 19: Beauty is a Bane
Wei Xi was awakened by her own stomach. When she opened her eyes, it was already afternoon, and she hadn’t eaten or drunk anything all day. She turned her face and saw that Ruan Shaonan was still sound asleep, buried in the shadows of the blinds, with most of his face blocked by his dark hair.
His hand was still resting on her waist, and Wei Xi didn’t want to wake him, so she carefully moved his hand away. But as soon as she sat up, her feet had not yet touched the ground when she was pulled back by two arms.
He turned her face to kiss her and asked in a muffled voice, ‘Where are you going?’
‘I’m hungry and want to go out and find something to eat. Aren’t you hungry?’
His arms wrapped tightly around her shoulders and he said nervously, ‘You can’t go, I won’t let you go, Weixi, you can’t leave me alone again.’
‘I’m not going, I’m not going,’ Wei Xi explained, feeling his face with her hands. “I’m just going out to get something to eat. Shaonan, I love you. You have my body and my heart. Where could I possibly go?”
He rubbed his chin on her shoulder. His voice was low and even a little aggrieved. ’I just can’t believe it. When I heard you say you loved me, I almost thought I was dreaming. But even in my dreams, you never said you loved me.’
Wei Xi said apologetically, ‘I’m sorry. In the past, I was too selfish, only thinking about myself and ignoring your feelings. Shaonan, I’m your Wei Xi…’ She leaned in close to his face and said in a trembling voice, ‘Your Wei Xi will always love you, until the day I die.’
Ruan Shaonan didn’t want his butler to bring him food, saying he hated being disturbed. Wei Xi wanted to go out and buy some food, but he wouldn’t let her go far. He might really be afraid, or he might know that he doesn’t have much time left, so he is racing against the clock.
Wei Xi’s heart aches, as if someone is pounding her chest with their fist. She dares not go far, so she only buys food from the hospital cafeteria. The food doesn’t taste very good, but he eats it with relish, planning to take Wei Xi on a trip after he is discharged from the hospital. He says that he hasn’t had a long vacation in a long time and that he must take her somewhere to relax.
Wei Xi really couldn’t hold back any longer, but she didn’t want to dampen his spirits, so she just pretended to agree.
Finally, it was time to go to bed. As soon as Ruan Shaonan touched the pillow, he fell asleep. His breathing was very heavy, so he must be very tired. Wei Xi was lying on the bed next to him as a companion. She was also very tired, but she couldn’t sleep at all. She was afraid that if she stayed in the room, she would disturb him, so she quietly stepped out.
The window in the corridor was not closed properly, and the cool night breeze blew in, instantly refreshing her. Wei Xi looked out of the window at the clouds floating silently in the night sky, and a crescent moon appeared and disappeared between the clouds.
At that moment, she happened to meet Dr. Hu, who was making his rounds.
He greeted her politely, ‘Has Mr. Ruan rested yet?’
“He fell asleep. Thank you for asking,’
‘He really needs to be careful. This illness is not easy to cure. He needs to pay more attention to his health.”
Wei Xi couldn’t help but ask, “Doctor Hu, is there still hope for him?”
Doctor Hu smiled, “Mr. Ruan is still young and has a good body. Of course he can get better. As long as he pays more attention to his diet, leads a regular life, and drinks less, he will get better soon.”
Wei Xi was stunned and asked doubtfully, ’No way, Doctor Hu, didn’t he have bone cancer and only have two months to live?’
Dr. Hu looked at her in bewilderment. ‘Mr. Ruan only has mild stomach bleeding, so how could he only have two months left? Who did you hear that from?’
Wei Xi’s head went into a spin. Who did she hear it from? Of course she heard it from Ruan Shaonan’s best friend Ling Luochuan.
Wei Xi smiled awkwardly, ‘It’s fine as long as he’s fine. It seems I was deceived.’
Dr. Hu also smiled, ‘You are Mr. Ruan’s girlfriend, right? Don’t worry, apart from a stomach problem, Mr. Ruan is otherwise perfectly healthy and will be discharged in a few days.‘
’I see, thank you.‘
’Oh, it’s nothing…’ Dr. Hu looked behind Weixi and said a little surprised, “Ah, Mr. Ruan, you’re still awake?”
Ruan Shaonan, wearing hospital clothes, came over and draped a jacket over Weixi’s shoulders, putting his arm around her shoulders and asking, ’Why did you disappear just as I fell asleep?’
‘I saw you asleep, so I came out for some fresh air.”
Dr. Hu smiled and said, “Mr. Ruan, your girlfriend and I were just talking. Someone played a joke on her, saying that you had bone cancer. Haha, it’s completely untrue, and it made her worry a lot.”
Ruan Shaonan obviously froze for a moment, looked down at the person next to him, and then smiled and said, ’I guess I made a bad friend choice and made her worry. I’ll be more careful in the future…’ He gripped her shoulders tightly, as if he was afraid she would run away.
Weixi didn’t say a word. Dr. Xiaohu thought she was sulking, so he kindly tried to smooth things over, “Haha, it’s good that you’ve explained everything now. Miss, don’t be angry anymore. It’s getting late, you should get some rest.”
After bidding farewell to Dr. Xiaohu, Ruan Shaonan asked, “Did Luochuan tell you?”
Weixi didn’t say a word.
He was a little nervous, ‘Do you believe I didn’t collude with him?’
Wei Xi still didn’t say a word, just pushed his hand away and turned around to leave.
Ruan Shaonan took a few steps forward and grabbed her hand, saying urgently behind her, ‘Wei Xi, don’t go! You believe me…ahem…’
He coughed violently, bending over in pain, but refused to let go of her hand.
She was just angry for a moment, but she didn’t expect him to react like this. Hurriedly, she helped him up and nervously asked, ‘Are you okay? Don’t scare me.’
‘My stomach hurts…’ He pressed his face against her shoulder and suddenly hugged her tightly.
Wei Xi then realised that she had been cheated on again. Not only did Ling Luochuan cheat on her, but now he was cheating on her too?
She pushed him with all her strength, but she couldn’t budge him. He picked her up in his arms and carried her back to the hospital room without saying a word.
The room was still filled with a faint, heady scent, like an ambiguous invitation. He pinned her down on the bed where they had previously made love, as if he wanted to relive the sweetness of those good times.
‘Ruan Shaonan, let go of me!’ Wei Xi yelled in anger, struggling with all her might.
But he just wouldn’t let go! He pinned her down with his body, doing nothing, just to keep her from leaving.
She slapped his back with her slender arms, until her hands ached. In the chaos, her knee hit his stomach. It hurt, and he let out a hiss of air, but he refused to let go. He just let her hit and yell without saying a word.
Until Wei Xi got tired of hitting and yelling, and she couldn’t think of any other way out, and finally he made her cry.
‘Ruan Shaonan, you bastard! You’re all bastards!’ She sobbed uncontrollably in his arms, ’How could you… how could you all lie to me like this? How could you scare me like this? Do you know how sad I was when I heard you might die? I was in a daze. I even thought, if you die, I don’t want to live either. But it turned out to be a lie, all of you lied to me. Ruan Shaonan, you really scared me.’
The man wiped her tears away little by little, so patiently and carefully. But the person in his arms was like water, and no matter how hard he wiped, he couldn’t get it all off.
After a while, he suddenly smiled helplessly, ‘In fact, I should really thank that kid. If it wasn’t for him, how long would I have to wait before I could hear your true feelings?’
He patted her back gently, as if he were soothing a child who was throwing a tantrum, ‘Weixi, you can’t leave me again. I’ll die if you do. That’s the truth.’
Ling Luochuan sat in the chair in the hospital room, holding a teacup in his hands, wondering whether to pour it out. The reason was none other than that Wei Xi had poured the tea, and he was somewhat suspicious of the safety of the tea.
Ruan Shaonan looked at him with a smile, ‘Don’t worry, it’s not poisonous.’
Ling Luochuan shrugged, ‘That’s hard to say. Haven’t you heard, ’I’m not afraid of a sharp knife, but I’m afraid of a beautiful smile?
Ruan Shaonan took the apple that Weixi had peeled and, while enjoying the favour of a beautiful woman, teased him, ‘Even if it is poisonous, you don’t need to be afraid. This is a hospital, so the rescue will be very timely. The doctors are also very responsible, and those little nurses who drool over you will definitely not let you die.’
Ling Luochuan snorted through his nose, ‘You win! A guy with no sense of humanity when it comes to the opposite sex.’
Wei Xi looked at the two men arguing with amusement. This was truly a scene unimaginable to outsiders. If the media and their subordinates saw it, not only would the two men’s reputations be ruined, but it would also shatter the expectations of many people.
Compared to Ling Luochuan’s indignation, Ruan Shaonan was much more pleased with himself. Wei Xi had been by his side these days, taking good care of him, gentle and considerate, understanding his needs and responding to his moods. This had made him feel good, and his manner of eating had also become more generous.
Wei Xi poured him a cup of warming tea and couldn’t help but softly remind him, ‘Eat slowly. The doctor said you have to chew your food slowly so that it can be easily absorbed.’
He smiled and touched her face, obediently slowing down.
‘God, my heart is about to break. You two are almost done, isn’t that a bit sour?’ Ling Luochuan said with a hand on his heart.
Ruan Shaonan glanced at him and said, ‘If you can’t stand it, you can leave.’
Ling Luochuan, however, had no intention of leaving at all. He looked at Wei Xi with his eyes, but his words were directed at Ruan Shaonan, ‘Congratulations, you’ve finally got what you wanted. But you can remember, such a good woman, but I helped you trick her back, you have to treat her well.’
Ruan Shaonan took Wei Xi’s hand and replied contentedly, ‘Do I need to be told that?’
Ling Luochuan became impish again, ‘But Weixi, he is actually very boring, especially when it comes to work. He is completely unfeeling. If one day you can’t stand him anymore, remember to come to me, my arms are always open to you.’
Weixi just thought that he was used to flirting and was always like that with everyone, so she just let it be a joke.
Who knew that Ruan Shaonan would just smile lightly, look at him coldly, and reply very seriously, ‘If there really is such a day, you’d better watch out. You know, I never show mercy to my enemies.’
Wei Xi sat in the pavilion and saw two gray-haired couples holding each other’s hands from afar, walking in the sunset. The afterglow stretched their shadows very long, as if forming a big Chinese character for ‘people’.
The men were talking about business, so she simply came out to get some fresh air. They didn’t avoid her, but she always avoided them. After all, it was her father they were dealing with, and they wanted to put him out of business.
Besides, both of them could talk and laugh with the enemy, and it was hard to tell what was true and what was not.
Just now, for example, Ruan Shaonan looked so serious that she was really nervous to death, but then the two men were just joking. After laughing, they both acted as if nothing had happened and returned to their previous affectionate behaviour. This pace, this behaviour, this unbelievable, ever-changing mood, was really too much for her to bear.
It was an indisputable fact that she could not keep up with them. Every time she thought about this, she would feel a sense of powerlessness. It had always been like this in the past. There had always been a wide river between them, and it was always Ruan Shaonan who stood on the other side. She could admire him and look up to him, but how could she keep up with him?
Wei Xi sat outside alone for a long time, looking up at the sky. It was already late. When she stood up, she saw that Ruan Shaonan had already walked over to her. She quickly gathered her thoughts and smiled as she greeted him, ‘Why are you out here?’
‘I was a little worried when you didn’t come back for a long time.’
‘He’s gone?’
‘Mm.’
‘Then let’s go back.’
‘Wei Xi…’ Ruan Shaonan suddenly took her hand, ‘You’re angry, aren’t you?’
Wei Xi looked at him in surprise. ‘I’m not angry, why do you ask?’
‘I think you are. If you don’t like it, we won’t talk about work in front of you in the future. I didn’t mean anything by it, I just don’t want you to think I’m avoiding you on purpose.’
Wei Xi felt warm inside when she heard these words. He had even noticed such a subtle thing.
‘The fact that you guys don’t deliberately avoid me means that you don’t consider me an outsider. I understand, it’s just that…’ She paused for a moment, then suddenly lowered her head, “Can I…ask you for a favour?”
Ruan Shaonan lifted her chin, “Silly girl, why are you being so polite to me? As long as it’s your request, I’ll agree to ten thousand things.”
Wei Xi smiled, and Ruan Shaonan whispered in her ear again, ’Except for one thing—the Lu family.’
Wei Xi’s smile froze on her face before she could rein it in.
The man sighed, ‘Wei Xi, I want you to stay by my side and be a simple and happy little woman. I don’t want you to think about anything, and I don’t want you to worry about anything. I want you to empty your mind and body, think about me if you want, think about your paintings if you want, as long as you’re happy, you can do whatever you want. But I don’t want those unnecessary people and distractions to get in your way, especially the Luk family. If you don’t get rid of the root, there will be endless trouble. You should understand this, shouldn’t you?”
Wei Xi looked up at him, “Cut the grass and uproot the roots? Does that include me too? Have you forgotten? My surname is also Lu.”
But the man just hugged her and smiled, “Silly girl, that’s not the same. Okay, let’s not argue about these silly little problems. I’m hungry, come back with me and eat something, okay?”
Wei Xi sighed. That was just how he was. He always liked to treat her like a child, thinking that he just had to coax her.
In fact, she knew in her heart that no matter how much he liked her, Ruan Shaonan would never let her become his ‘femme fatale’ or ‘witch of the nation’. He was already in such a high position, and would never allow himself to have any weaknesses, let alone give his enemies the opportunity to use this against him.
After all, for these men of power, the best woman in the world is just a cloud in the sky. In their spare time, men can admire the beauty of white clouds. But clouds are just clouds, and they can never bring rain, let alone change the world.
Her voice trailed off. ‘In fact, I just want to tell you that not everyone in the Lu family is evil. Just like my younger sister, Youxi. When she was little, she had an accident and fell down the stairs. The doctor said she had a high degree of paraplegia and would have to spend the rest of her life in bed. And…she has never harmed anyone, let alone you.’
She saw her frown slightly, and Ruan Shaonan cooed softly at her again, ‘Look at you, frowning as you speak. Alright, I promise you, I will think about this matter carefully, okay?”
With the conversation having reached this point, what else could Wei Xi say? He, Ruan Shaonan, was someone who never bargained with people, no one dared, and no one could. Now, whether it was just a way to placate her or to coax her, he was willing to make concessions for her sake. She really couldn’t ask for more.
Chapter 20: The Definition of Happiness
Ruan Shaonan’s happy time did not last long. After he was discharged from the hospital, he had a pile of work waiting for him to deal with.
Wei Xi’s school had already started the summer holidays, and despite Ruan Shaonan’s repeated requests, she did not move in with him at the villa, nor did she go back to work at ‘Perfect Beauty’. She was still a little hesitant, considering Ruan Shaonan’s status.
However, without that income, she would have problems paying for her future tuition and living expenses, as well as the expensive paints and art supplies.
Ruan Shaonan gave her an affiliated card, but she kept throwing it in a drawer in his villa. She appreciated his intentions, but she didn’t want to become an accessory like the card. It wasn’t that she was being pretentious, but rather it was a result of years of habit. Another factor was her pride. The more she felt the gap between her and him, the more she wanted to maintain her independence in terms of money.
Later, when she told Ruofei about this, Ruofei said, ‘You’re not even going to study abroad for him, so of course he’s responsible for taking care of you. Besides, he can afford to support you, so why are you making things difficult for yourself?’
Weixi said, ‘It’s hard to be dependent on someone else. If I rely on him for everything, then if he ever leaves me, I’ll starve to death.’
Ruixi thought for a moment, ‘You’re right, but Ruan Shaonan is clearly a male chauvinist. He won’t say anything to your face, but he’ll be angry inside.’
‘He should…understand, right?’ Ruixi said this with a little trepidation, in fact, she herself was not sure.
In recent days, Ruixi has been running around. But in the midst of an economic crisis, it was really hard to find a job. After running around for a few days, her legs were weak, but she still hadn’t found anything.
Ruan Shaonan watched her for a few days without saying a word, and finally, unable to bear it any longer, he asked her, ‘Is spending my money so hard on you? You lost your job because of me, so just consider this my compensation. Is that not okay?’
Wei Xi had just returned from outside, and as she drank some water, she shook her head, ‘No! I decided to quit on my own, what does it have to do with you?’
‘Then I’ll lend it to you. I’m not lending it to you for free, though. When you graduate and get a job, you can pay me back with interest at the bank rate.”
Wei Xi thought about it for a moment, but still shook her head. “No, I can’t do that. I can take out a loan with you for tuition fees, but I can’t take out a loan with you for living expenses. I have to earn it myself.”
Ruan Shaonan was really at a loss for words, and looked at her with raised eyebrows. ’Who do you take after in terms of your temperament?’
Wei Xi smiled and said, ‘Don’t you know? The greatest artists in the world are all destitute. Art can only touch people’s souls when it is born out of hunger. Have you heard of Gauguin? He drank the paste used to paste posters. And Van Gogh, he was so hungry that he even ate oil mixed with turpentine. And…’
Ruan Shaonan became more and more uncomfortable as he listened, so he simply interrupted her, ‘That’s enough, I don’t want you to eat such disgusting things. How about this, I have many friends in business who like to collect famous paintings. You can help them repair the paintings. It should be a good income, more than you earn at ‘Perfect’, and you have freedom in your working hours.
Wei Xi nodded, ‘That’s a good idea, but…people who repair famous paintings usually look for more famous painters. Most of those paintings are priceless, will they trust me?’
Ruan Shaonan was busy with his own business and didn’t even lift his head. ‘It depends on your own abilities. I’m only responsible for the introduction, whether it works is up to you. You said you wanted to be self-reliant, so why don’t you even have that much confidence?’
Wei Xi thought about it and agreed. If she didn’t even have that much confidence, all those years of painting would have been for nothing. Although Ruan Shaonan introduced this job, she was earning a living by her own abilities, so she felt at ease.
Ruan Shaonan did gain face, and looking at the paintings in his study, Wei Xi felt as if she were dreaming. She had no idea what kind of friends Ruan Shaonan had, but his collection was full of masterpieces. Holding the paintings, she felt her hands shaking, afraid of making a mistake.
Ruan Shaonan looked at her, not knowing whether to let her keep them or not. He said slowly, ‘They’re just a few paintings, even if you break them, I can afford to replace them.’
Wei Xi had just let out a sigh of relief when Ruan Shaonan continued, ‘But I’m not going to let you off the hook for free. You don’t have any other skills besides painting, so you might as well pay me back little by little with your body.’
Why is this guy’s mouth so poisonous? She had only refused his help, and he was already picking on her like this. She knew that he had been holding back all this time, just waiting for this opportunity to let it out. What a calculating and stingy man!
But his words did completely rouse her fighting spirit.
After it really started, Wei Xi found that it wasn’t as difficult as she had imagined, but it was very time-consuming. Most of these oil paintings were from an ancient era, and the surface of the paint had small cracks. It required skill and patience to repair these small cracks without damaging the painting itself.
Wei Xi worked very hard, and Ruan Shaonan simply gave her half of the study on the top floor of the ‘Yitian’ building. Every day, she would repair the painting in this room while he worked in the other. The purpose of this arrangement was that whenever he looked up, he would see her. Unfortunately, he was a busy man with little time for romance, and could only multi-task.
The battle for the acquisition of Yitian and Taihuang was at a critical juncture, and every minute could bring about a change in the situation. The plan for them to go on a trip together had to be postponed.
Ruan Shaonan felt sorry about this, but Wei Xi didn’t care. Being with someone you like, no matter what you do, it’s all a joy. Just like them right now, he’s busy every day, and she’s not idle either, but when they get tired, a glance between them is enough to understand each other.
These days, Wei Xi has been thinking about what happiness really is. Some people say that happiness is not living a long life, not being rich and powerful, but being able to eat when you want to, and being loved when you want to be.
If you look at it from this perspective, Wei Xi is really happy right now.
Ruan Shaonan is not a very interesting man. In fact, he is mostly very serious, and when he has a stern face, it makes people even more afraid to get close to him. His subordinates are all afraid of him, and Wei Xi is also sometimes afraid of him, especially when he is angry. However, he is still quite good to her. It is probably because he is afraid that she will run away, so even if she touches his sore spot, he will still keep his temper in check.
But perhaps out of habit, he always speaks to her in a tone of voice that is meant for a child. Whether he is cajoling her or scolding her.
For example, he will tell her not to go to bed with her hair wet, not to walk around with her bare feet, not to go out without having breakfast, not to bite her pencils, and not to smear her face with paint like a tomcat.
Wei Xi has lived a carefree life like a wild plant for so many years, and she thinks she is still pretty good at taking care of herself. But he is too demanding, and she is used to doing things her own way. She always hits a wall in front of him, which has almost made her lose all confidence. However, he really spoils her. He pays close attention to what she likes, what she doesn’t like, and what her usual taboos are.
New Year is approaching, and Ruan Shaonan has a rare few days off, so he slept in late in the morning. Wei Xi is used to running back and forth between the two places, and since she stayed up late last night, she decided to stay over.
She is used to waking up early, so when Ruan Shaonan found her, she was fixing her painting in the studio. He hugged her from behind and kissed her, and she could smell the paint.
Wei Xi turned her face to respond to him, but she couldn’t help but laugh out loud. Because he had just woken up, his hair was messy and he looked a little sleepy and a little silly. He was usually so perfect and meticulous, and it was rare to see him so unkempt, which was somehow endlessly endearing.
‘I’m off today, shall we go out for a bit?’ He breathed in her ear.
Wei Xi smiled and dodged him, ‘Wait for me a moment, I’m almost done with this painting.’
‘There’s no such thing as being done with work, don’t worry about the time, just stop,’ he said, and then took her paintbrush away from her.
There were many people in the street. It was close to the New Year, and everyone was buying New Year’s goods, so there was a lively festive atmosphere everywhere. Ruan Shaonan parked the car in front of a clothing store. Wei Xi felt that she had seen it before, and suddenly remembered that this was the same store he had brought her to last time.
‘It’s almost New Year’s Eve, you should buy some new clothes. The clothes in this store are very suitable for young girls, let’s go in and have a look,’ he said, putting his arm around her waist affectionately.
The staff were still as warm and attentive as ever, and Ruan Shaonan sat on the sofa casually flipping through the magazines. When Wei Xi walked out of the fitting room, she felt that the scene was very familiar. Against this resplendent backdrop, she still remembers to this day what a nervous she felt standing here. And of course, there was humiliation.
‘It’s very pretty…’ Ruan Shaonan patted her shoulder from behind, kissed her cheek fondly, and sincerely praised her.
The saleswoman beamed and said, “Mr. Ruan has a good eye. This wool skirt is Valentino’s new season’s model, and it suits Miss’s elegant temperament perfectly.”
Ruan Shaonan helped Wei Xi adjust the collar, and said, ’Remember Miss Lu’s measurements. She hates trouble, so in the future, send her a list of any new arrivals so she can pick them out.’
The shop assistant immediately said, ‘We can deliver the ready-made clothes directly to your home for Miss Lu to try on. If Miss Lu is not satisfied, we can also contact European manufacturers on your behalf to have them tailor-make clothes for Miss Lu.’
He then smiled contentedly, ‘That would be best.’ Turning back to the person in his arms, he said, ‘It’s harder than climbing to the sky to let you go out shopping by yourself. I can’t always accompany you, so this is much more convenient.’
Wei Xi felt a little helpless. ‘Mr. Ruan, I’m still a student. Wearing international designer brands every day and walking around the school, don’t you think it’s too showy?’
Ruan Shaonan picked up a small white cashmere coat and held it in front of her, casually answering, ‘Just say it’s an imitation version you found online, that’ll do.’
Wei Xi was at a loss for words, it was unbelievable that he would think of that.
Ruan Shaonan seemed to be in high spirits, and the shop assistants were also busy. Wei Xi felt like a living mannequin, being turned around like a top. He was having a good time, but she was trying hard, and soon she was tired and frowning, but she didn’t dare say anything, for fear that he would scold her for being heartless.
The shop assistant was very perceptive and understanding, and said, ‘Ms. Lu must be tired. Why don’t you and Mr. Ruan have a cup of tea on the sofa and rest for a while, and I’ll go to the front to see if there are any scarves that suit you?’
Wei-xi sat on the sofa and looked around casually, when suddenly she noticed a low-cut, tight leather skirt with a hot and sexy style. She couldn’t help but think that if it weren’t for Ru-fei’s characteristically loud and outgoing face, she would be the perfect match for this kind of clothing, being both charming and spontaneous.
Seeing that she kept staring at the leather skirts, Ruan Shaonan suddenly understood something, so he asked her, ‘By the way, why not pick out a few things for Ru-fei too, so that she can wear them with you? Wouldn’t that make you feel more comfortable?’
‘Well…‘ Wei Xi hesitated for a moment, “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
’Silly girl, don’t be polite with me, it’s not like it’s anything important,’ he whispered in her ear, in a volume only the two of them could hear, ’You’ve given me your whole self, what’s a few clothes? If you’re embarrassed, then make it up to me tonight.’
Wei Xi’s face flushed. Although they were already intimate with each other, he had never made such a joke, especially not in public.
Seeing her embarrassment, Ruan Shaonan laughed out loud and patted her apple-shaped face. ‘I was talking about letting you cook for me. What were you thinking?’
He actually played a joke on her! Wei Xi angrily looked at him, condemning him with an incredibly resentful look.
‘Stop glaring at me like a sad puppy, it’s not intimidating at all,’ he said, kissing her on the eye and hugging her as they both laughed heartily. He knew she was too shy to lose face, so she would do whatever he said.
Later, thinking that she had already bought it anyway, Ruan Shaonan asked the shop assistant to match the same colour of leather boots and bag for Wei Xi. This was really extravagant! Wei Xi felt dizzy just counting the zeros on the price tag, and couldn’t help but pull Ruan Shaonan’s sleeve, but it was useless.
On the way back, Wei Xi looked back at the bags and packages piled up in the back seat, and felt a pang of pain.
‘Isn’t this a waste? If I wear these clothes, I probably won’t even dare to go out the door.’
‘What’s there to be afraid of? I’m Ruan Shaonan’s woman, of course I want the best of everything.’ He can be such a macho man sometimes.
Wei Xi couldn’t help but ask him, ‘How many women have you said something like this to?’
Ruan Shaonan laughed softly, ‘You’re not jealous, are you? No one else has ever been treated like this except you.’
Wei Xi snorted, ‘Who knows if what you say is true.’
He looked at the road ahead, his eyes focused, ‘Sweet words have certainly been said, but that was all in bed, just to fit the mood. I hate it when people lie to me, and those women understand that they can’t get any extra advantages with me, so they are honest. Most beautiful women are vain and will sell anything for money, but what I need is just sensual pleasure. The relationships between men and women in this circle may look decent on the surface, but peel away the skin and it is nothing more than a naked transaction of money.
Wei Xi said, ‘Not necessarily all women are like that. Among the women you have bought, there may be someone who really loved you, but was afraid to say it because of your indifference, and their hearts were broken.’
Ruan Shaonan laughed, ‘Are you crying out for them? Silly girl, do you think they care? Even if there is one or two with real feelings, they will forget about it in no time. This kind of feeling is so cheap that it is not even worthy of giving to beggars on the street.’
He can be so mean sometimes, but he has a knack for pinpointing human weaknesses. He can’t be said to be entirely wrong, just too utilitarian.
Wei Xi didn’t say anything else, and turned her face to look at the street scene outside the window.
While waiting for the red light, Ruan Shaonan received a phone call, and who knew his face changed after he took it.
‘Wei Xi, I have something to do and I have to go back to the company for a while. Can you go back by yourself?’
Seeing his face, she knew that the situation was serious. Wei Xi immediately said, ‘You can just drop me off in front, I’ll take the car back myself.’
Chapter 21: A Deadly Lie
After Ruan Shaonan left, Weixi suddenly felt a little panicky. Half of it was worry for him, and half was an emotion she couldn’t put into words.
Weixi didn’t know where to go for a while, so she simply started walking aimlessly on the street. The sky in the city was a pale, pale blue, with a few fluffy white clouds.
The sky was high and the clouds were light, and the winters in the south are always a thin layer of clear warmth. It was a good day for going out.
Wei Xi was aimlessly walking on the street when she suddenly heard a frantic engine sound. Then, an incredibly powerful motorcycle passed by her. With a sharp brake, it came to a halt a few centimetres away from her toes.
The rider took off his black helmet, and in the sunlight, a handsome face was revealed.
Wei Xi asked doubtfully, ‘Why is it that every time I wander aimlessly on the street, I get picked up by you?’
‘Don’t you know? I have a hobby, and I like to pick up little cats and dogs and bring them home.’ Chi Mo smiled, his white teeth, deep features, and tanned skin. He looked a bit like a model in an advertisement, and was indescribably handsome in the warm winter sun.
‘What do you want to do with them? You don’t like animals.‘
’I’ll cook them for soup and have a feast.‘
Wei Xi burst out laughing. He was just like that sometimes, unrestrained and bold, with an unbridled tongue, but not annoying.
’What are you doing?’ Chi Mo asked.
Wei Xi shrugged, “I have nowhere to go, so I’m just wandering around.”
Chi Mo took out a spare helmet and threw it to her, ’That’s perfect, let’s go, I’ll take you for a ride.’
Chi Mo parked the car at Sunshine Coast, the most beautiful place in this coastal city.
The beach was as white as snow, the bay was as green as emerald, and the coastline was bathed in sunshine… Everything looked like it had come right out of a magazine.
The two sat side by side on the golden beach, leaning their shoulders against each other, and listening to the waves in the distance.
In such an atmosphere, with such a view, and in such bright sunshine, it seemed that there was nothing to say. Just sitting like this was full of poetic beauty.
Amidst the sound of the waves crashing against the shore, Chi Mo suddenly asked in a daze, ‘Weixi, are you happy?’
Weixi smiled slightly, ‘I’m very happy, but…I’m afraid.’
Chi Mo looked at her strangely, ‘What are you afraid of?’
“I don’t know, maybe it’s because I’m so happy that I can’t believe it’s all real, and I always doubt that the joy and excitement in front of me is just an illusion.’
Chi Mo laughed softly, ‘You’re afraid because you care. You care about him, and that’s why he shines in your eyes. If you didn’t care about him, he’d be nothing.’
Wei Xi laughed softly, thinking that what she said was reasonable. But if Ruan Shaonan knew, he would probably scold her for being heartless again.
Before they knew it, dusk had crept up. The two of them leaned back to look at the beach in the twilight, chatting idly.
‘Chi Mo, do you remember how long we’ve known each other?‘
’Two or three years, I think.‘
’Do you remember how we first met?‘
’Yes, you and Ru Fei were still working in a bar. Some thugs were bothering you, refusing to pay for the drinks they’d had, and even touching you. I happened to see what was going on and taught them a lesson. But you, you little girl, didn’t even say ‘thank you’.’ Chi Mo complained, not without a hint of resentment.
Wei Xi yawned and smiled, ‘I was in shock. But to be honest, you looked really cool when you were beating people up. I felt like I was watching a movie.’
Chi Mo laughed complacently, ‘So you just noticed now? Then why do you still dislike me so much?’
“There are so many people who like you, I’m afraid there aren’t enough to go around, from the most beautiful to the backstreets. You’d better watch out, or the heavens will teach you a lesson.’
Chi Mo turned around and pretended to tear her mouth, and Wei Xi laughed and dodged.
‘Thinking about it now, I really should thank you properly.’ Wei Xi blocked the rosy glow with her hand. ‘At that time, we had just left the orphanage, didn’t know anything, and were bullied every day. You were the first person to help us, and the first person to make Ru Fei let go of me and go with you. Although she kept saying that it was just a fling with you, I feel that she really likes you…’
Chi Mo turned her face to look at the person leaning against her back. Her small body leaned against him, but her little mouth never stopped talking.
Sometimes when she looked at her like this, Chi Mo would wonder what love really was. Was it love at first sight when two people locked eyes? Or did love grow over time when two people spent every day together?
And why did people fall in love with another person? Was it because of a smile in the crowd? Or was it the pitiful look of someone in trouble?
A pang of pain shot through his heart as he looked at her long eyelashes that fluttered like butterfly wings. He suddenly interrupted her, ‘Weixi, I have to go.’
Weixi immediately sat up straight and turned to look at him, ‘Where are you going?’
‘I don’t know, I just don’t want to stay here anymore. Maybe I’ll go back to the northeast and take a look. That’s where my parents are from.’
Weixi had never been that far away before. Her impression of the north was of endless snow and boundless deserts. Chi Mo was used to the bright lights of the city, so how could he stand such a desolate place?
‘What’s there? How will you live?’
‘White mountains and black water, soybeans and sorghum. As long as you have hands and feet, you won’t starve to death.’
‘Do you have to go?’
Chi Mo calmed his thoughts, put an arm around Wei Xi’s shoulders, and grinned, ‘What? You can’t bear to part with me?’
Wei Xi raised her face and said frankly, ‘I just can’t bear to let you go. You don’t have any friends there, and even if things are difficult here, we can at least take care of each other. Don’t go, stay here, okay?’
Chi Mo’s heart stirred. The bright, sparkling water in front of him overlapped with the clarity of three years ago, like the dew on grass leaves, cool and clear. He couldn’t hold back any longer, and whispered, ‘Wei Xi, can I hug you?’
Wei Xi froze for a moment. Before she could react, Chi Mo reached out his long arms and held her tightly in his embrace.
He breathed heavily. She was in his arms, and he could smell the fragrance in her hair, just like the countless nights he had smelled it at Ruo Fei’s. He remembered her lips, pale pink, like the cherry blossoms he had seen in Ueno as a child. When the wind blew, the heavy petals fell to the ground, and then they danced in the moonlight, as pure as snow.
His blood surged. At this last moment, let him indulge once, just once. After this parting, it would be an eternity before they met again.
‘Chi Mo, what are you doing?’ Sensing his intentions, Wei Xi flutters up like a moth. ‘Chi Mo, let go…’
The waves crashed against the shore, and the spray hit the air. His fingers tightened around her chin, so tightly that he bit her lip. She struggled, her hands pinned behind her back, her eyes wide with surprise and fear.
After an unknown length of time, he finally let go, and Wei Xi took a step back, her tears almost falling. She had trusted him so much, but how could he have treated her like this?
Chi Mo didn’t say anything. For so long, he only dared to watch from afar, afraid to get close, afraid to touch, but at the very moment he should let go, he crossed the line and did the most inappropriate thing.
Wei Xi wanted to walk back to the city on her own, but Chi Mo wouldn’t let her. It was far from the city, and it was getting dark soon, so how could he let her go alone on the road?
He took her back to the city before letting her go. Wei Xi waved her hand to hail a taxi, got in and drove off. Chi Mo watched the taillights of the taxi in silence, as if they were two red tears blending into the tide-like sea of cars.
He got back into his car, put on his helmet and looked up to see a huge poster hanging from the cinema across the street, which read: There is no drug that cannot be quit, only love that cannot be quit.
There is no drug that cannot be quit, only love that cannot be quit…
He stood there, stunned, lost in thought for half a day. For a moment, he had a thousand thoughts racing through his mind, his heart aching and his spirit broken, not knowing what to do.
But in the end, he smiled sadly, knowing that it was all for the best.
When Wei-xi returned to the seaside villa, she found the light in the study on, and Ruan Shaonan had already returned.
She tried to compose herself. The housekeeper greeted her respectfully, ‘Miss Lu, you’re back.’
Wei Xi saw that he was holding a tray in his hand and asked, ‘Mr. Ruan didn’t have dinner?’
‘Yes, as soon as he got back, he went into the study, and we didn’t dare go in.’
Wei Xi’s heart sank, and she guessed that it wasn’t good news. But even if the sky were to fall, one still had to eat.
“Tell you what, go to the kitchen and get a bowl of congee, I’ll take it in and try.’
The door to the study was open, and Wei Xi knocked on the door from the doorway.
‘Mr. Ruan, the congee is ready. Do you want a bowl?’
He was looking at some documents, his eyebrows knitted and his head not raised. ‘Leave it there and go away.’
Wei Xi smiled and walked straight in. He looked up and saw it was her. He chuckled, ‘So it’s you.’
‘You can’t even recognise my voice. You really are busy.‘ She placed the bowl on the table and said, “But even if you’re busy, you still need to eat something.”
Ruan Shaonan leaned back and rubbed his forehead. “He got away.”
’Who?‘
’Lu Renxi.’
Wei Xi was suddenly startled. Even though so much time had passed and even though she was no longer the humble and helpless little girl she had been back then, when she suddenly heard this name, she could still taste the fear that had taken root in her heart back then on the tip of her tongue.
‘My second brother? What happened to him?’
“He falsified accounts, bribed government officials, and the construction company under his name used shoddy materials to build substandard buildings that killed people. The evidence was already conclusive. I never thought that he would receive word and run away first.’
Wei Xi didn’t show any emotion, just nodded and lifted the bowl up, handing it to the man. ‘He’s always been very clever, and he’s inherited Lu Zixu’s legacy. It’s reasonable that he could escape this time. Even if we step back, he’s now a dog without a home, and he poses no threat to you or Yi Tian, so what are you still worried about?’
‘But I want him to go to jail!’ Ruan Shaonan took a sip and then set the cup aside.
Wei Xi sighed, ‘I don’t want you to be like this just because of me. In fact, I’ve long since forgotten about that incident. I only brought it up that day to deliberately upset you. The way you’re acting makes me feel uneasy.’
He pulled her onto his lap, ‘But I can’t just pretend that nothing happened. I can’t let the person who hurt you get away with it. I can let it go if I don’t know how you’ve been living before. But now that I know everything, it doesn’t make sense for me not to do anything for you.’
Wei Xi resisted the urge to sigh and put her arms around the man’s neck. ‘I’m afraid you’ll hurt yourself. I don’t want you to break the law in your quest for revenge and end up getting into trouble. Although in your circles, good strategies and tactics are necessary to defeat your opponents, and you are dealing with those kinds of people. But you have also seen the example of the Lu family. While taking by force is certainly a shortcut, it is not sustainable in the long run. Honest business is the foundation.’
Seeing that the man’s expression had softened slightly, Wei Xi picked up the bowl again and brought the spoon to his lips. ‘There’s a saying in the marketplace, and it’s most suitable here.’
Ruan Shaonan opened his mouth and obediently took a sip, then asked immediately, ‘What’s the saying?’
Wei Xi smiled and poked him in the nose, ‘If you mess with people, you have to pay back.’
The man laughed heartily, and the gloom in his brows disappeared. He tightened his embrace of her arm and praised, ‘You’re quick-witted. Just looking at your mouth, you seem like a master negotiator. If I take you with me in future negotiations, I won’t be invincible?’
Wei Xi smiled, ‘So that means you think I’m right. Then can Mr. Ruan put aside business for a while and eat more?’
Ruan Shaonan sighed, ‘I’m not just angry about this. The bank under Yitian Group has taken on a merger project, but who knew that Wang Dongyang had lost the materials and leaked the project. Now the other party wants to sue Yitian, and I’m thinking of a way to resolve it.‘
Wei Xi’s heart sank as well. “So serious, what are you going to do?”
’If we go to court, the media will get involved, and it will definitely damage the group’s image. So I plan to settle with them privately and pay compensation.‘
’Do you have to pay a lot?‘
’Not really, about 3 or 4 million.’
Wei Xi let out an ‘oh’, realising that the small matter of paying compensation was not as important as the big matter of Yi Tian losing face. She then asked, ‘What about Wang Dongyang? What are you going to do with him?’
‘I had someone check him out, and he didn’t deliberately betray Yi Tian. But how can I trust someone so careless to stay by my side? Of course I’m letting him go.’
Ruan Shaonan looked at Wei Xi’s thoughtful face and lifted her chin, ‘What? You don’t agree with me?’
‘He doesn’t seem like such a careless person, maybe something happened recently. If you fire him like this, the news will spread in the industry and no other company will want him. It’s better to give him another chance, he’ll be grateful to you.‘
Ruan Shaonan smiled, “You’re too soft-hearted, I just want him to know that there are some mistakes that cannot be made.”
’You can punish him lightly, and he’s so smart, he definitely won’t make the same mistake again. He’s your subordinate, not your enemy. You can be ruthless with your enemies, but your subordinates are the ones who helped you build your empire. You can only expect loyalty from them if you treat them with leniency. Human hearts are a very mysterious thing, and sometimes even money cannot compete with them. For you, this is just a trivial matter. But for him, it may be a chance of a lifetime. After all, the company will always lose money. If you show leniency now, you may reap even greater rewards in the future.”
Ruan Shaonan looked her over from top to bottom, making Wei Xi feel uncomfortable.
‘Weixi, I can’t quite imagine it. If you hadn’t left the Lu family, maybe you would be my worst rival today.‘
Weixi thought he was joking, “Your rival? Then I’d be dead for sure, wouldn’t I? I don’t want that.” She was about to stand up, but Ruan Shaonan held her back, “If you were my enemy, I wouldn’t let you die.”
’What would you do then?’ Weixi simply leaned into his arms and tilted her little head to look at him.
‘I will…‘ He leaned in close to her ear, his breath cold, his tone mysteriously mysterious, and there was an indescribable strangeness about it. “I will make you unable to live, unable to die…” He suddenly and wickedly began to tickle the tender flesh under her ribs, asking as he did so, “Are you afraid? Are you afraid?”
’Hey, yes, yes…’ Wei Xi never expected him to use this tactic. She was extremely ticklish, and immediately burst out laughing uncontrollably, her tears almost flowing.
The two of them laughed and teased, almost rolling onto the ground. Wei Xi put her arms around the man’s neck, her cheeks flushed, her eyes smiling and watery, like the lake under the moonlight on a moonlit night, reflecting the moonlight and the clouds.
When a breeze blew, the round moon shattered, with a beauty that moved the heart. Ruan Shaonan couldn’t help kissing her, but after just a second, he froze.
‘What’s wrong?’ Wei Xi turned her face to the side and looked at him strangely.
He traced her lips with his thumb and noticed a small bite mark on them, so small that she herself hadn’t noticed it. He looked at her intently for a moment, his voice low and deep, “Where did you go this afternoon?”
Wei Xi suddenly felt as if she had turned to stone. Her heart felt as if it had missed a beat, and it was a long time before she answered, ’This afternoon… I went to see Ru Fei. Why?’
‘Really?‘ His smile was faint, just a slight tug at the corners of his lips. He dragged out the two words, as if he were deliberately stretching out the words.
’So how is she doing these days?‘
’It’s still the same…’ Her voice gradually faded.
His face was full of uncertainty, and she felt panicked. She was not a natural liar, and lying to him was too difficult for her. Under his penetrating gaze, her heart beat fast and hard. She dared not avert her eyes from his, but felt her face burning with heat, and her skin burning as if on fire.
‘Then that’s all,’ he said, as if returning to his normal self, and back to his previous deep affection.
“The porridge has cooled, I’ll go and get you another bowl,’ She turned around and stood up. Only when she was carrying the bowl did she feel weak all over and her fingers tremble a little.
‘No, I don’t have much of an appetite. I’m going to be busy until late tonight, so you go to bed first,’ he said, then went back to his work, looking like he was keeping people at arm’s length.
When Wei Xi reached the door, she looked back. His face was immersed in the shadows of the table lamp, and his silhouette was still distinct. Perhaps it was the background that made him look even more handsome with his broad eyebrows and starry eyes, but he was just too indifferent.
She slipped out of the room, went back to the bedroom, and closed the door. She lay down on Ruan Shaonan’s big bed, looked up at the ceiling, and felt an indescribable sense of confusion and complexity in her heart.
Thinking about the scene just now, Wei Xi subconsciously touched her lips. She knew he must have sensed something. That was how he was sometimes, so perceptive that it was frightening. He had said that he hated it when people lied to him, but she had done the very thing he hated most, so it was no wonder that he was angry.
But how could she tell him? She knew his vindictive temper, so she didn’t dare say anything. But her stammering and evasive manner made her look like a traitor.
Wei Xi sighed, wrapped herself in the quilt and tried not to think about it anymore. But she couldn’t help remembering that face in the golden sunset, silent as the night.
Thinking about what happened in the afternoon, Wei Xi was still a little dazed. Chi Mo’s embrace had a kind of clean, fresh air about it, as if it were the young Ruan Shaonan. It was just as warm, with the same steady, powerful heartbeat. Being held tightly in his arms gave her the illusion of time flowing backwards. But the thrilling kiss made her feel both shocked and afraid.
All these years have passed, and he has never treated her like this. He sometimes jokes with her, but he always knows when to stop. He has always treated her well, and she has always thought that he was just being polite to her, or that it was just the compassion and sympathy of the strong for the weak.
Could it be that she has been wrong?
Chapter 22 Baby, you’re shaking
Wei Xi hadn’t slept well for several days in a row, her eyes were dark and her face was always listless.
When Ruifei got up in the morning and saw her busy by herself, he couldn’t help but ask her, ‘Why have you been leaning on me these past two days? Did Ruan Shaonan agree?’
Wei Xi was learning to make sushi. ‘He’s been busy lately, and I don’t see him when I go back. I’m all alone with a house full of servants, and I feel like an idiot.’
Ru Fei picked up a ham and put it in his mouth. ‘What? Did you have a fight?’
Wei Xi sighed. ‘If only I had a fight, I’d feel better. Right now, I’m like a concubine who’s been banished to the cold palace, unable to see the emperor’s face.’
Ru Fei picked up another ham and shoved it in his mouth. ‘Come on, if you were a concubine, the emperor would have executed you a hundred and eighty times already.’
Wei Xi slapped her hand, angry and laughing at the same time, ‘You’re heartless, you make it sound like I’m the one who brought this on myself. I’ve noticed that you’re really biased, always taking his side.’
Ru Fei glanced at her, ‘I’m only saying this because I’m on your side. I’m not unaware of your temper, you can push people to the brink with just a few words. Ruan Shaonan is good to you, he always gives in to you. Don’t keep fighting with him, if you make him angry, you’ll only end up suffering in the end.’
Wei Xi burst out laughing. ‘When you put it like that, it’s like I’ve entered a dragon’s den, ready to die at any moment.’
‘The real dragon’s den is your heart. Ask yourself, can you leave him? If you can’t, then don’t make things harder for yourself.’
If she hadn’t poured herself a glass of milk for breakfast, ‘Anyway, what happened between you?’
Wei Xi paused for a moment and sighed, ‘It’s hard to explain… Oh, by the way, did you know that Chi Mo is leaving?’
The person who had just drunk the milk was half lying on the bed, flipping through a magazine as she answered, ‘Yes, I heard him say that a long time ago.’ She suddenly thought of something and asked, ‘He came to see you?’
‘We ran into each other on the street a couple of days ago, and that’s what he told me.’ Wei Xi laid strips of ham, carrots, and cucumbers on top of the seaweed one after the other.
If she hadn’t been watching Weixi’s expression, she would have asked, ‘Did he…do anything?’
This was a strange question, and Weixi looked at Ruifei in surprise, fixating on her for a moment. ‘Did you know something?’
‘I…’ Ruifei was at a loss for words, and when she met Weixi’s inquisitive gaze, she knew she couldn’t hide it any longer, and simply confessed everything, ‘Yes, I knew. From the first day we met, I knew…he likes you.’
Wei Xi almost doubted she was hearing things. She looked at Ru Fei’s expression, which did not seem to be calm, and couldn’t help but ask her, ‘Ru Fei, what do you think?’
Ru Fei smiled and looked down. Why did everyone keep asking her what she thought?
“Isn’t it obvious? I like him, and he likes you. That night three years ago, the person he wanted to take away was actually you. But you wouldn’t go with him, and he knew that in his heart. But I would. From the first time I saw him, I liked him. I want to be with him. Is that so strange?’
Wei Xi put the knife on the table and looked at her, ‘Does Chi Mo know?’
She lit a cigarette and took a deep drag before saying, ‘I like him, but it’s my own business. Just like how he likes you, he’s never thought about telling you. Over the years, he has helped us silently…to be precise, he has helped you out of a lot of trouble. The last time Ling Luochuan locked you in the box, he saw it on the monitor and, in a moment of panic, pulled the fire alarm. The VIP monitors were secretly installed by Wei Chengbao, and no one knew about them except a few trusted people. He knew in his heart the great risk he was taking. If Wei Chengbao found out that he was using the system for personal gain, he might not even have a life left. But he still did it, and even I was surprised.
Wei Xixi sat down in a chair, shaking his head and smiling bitterly, ‘So, you are all understanding people, and I am the only one in the dark.’
Ru sighed, ‘That’s because you already have someone in your heart. For so many years, you have never graduated from Ruan Shaonan, so naturally you are blind to everything around you.’
You care about him, and that’s why he shines so brightly. You don’t care about him, and he is nothing.
Wei Xi suddenly remembered these words from Chi Mo, and felt a sudden pain in her heart. What appeared before her eyes was his expression of loneliness as the sun set, and the voice that was as light as the sea breeze.
‘As you can see on the right, how could you hide it for so long? And still act so carefree?’
‘Are you angry?’
Wei Xi looked at this person who had shared both good times and bad with her, and was closer to her than a real sister, and said with a heartache, ‘I feel aggrieved for you…’
If not shaking her head and laughing lightly, ‘It’s strange, I don’t feel it at all. Just like you with Ruan Shaonan, you have silently and obsessively stayed by his side for so many years, do you ever feel aggrieved?’
When she mentioned Ruan Shaonan, Wei Xi just felt like there was nothing to say. Perhaps all the infatuated women in the world have the same face. Once they are carefree and at peace, they feel that they can look down on the world and that all human love has nothing to do with them. Little did they know, they have not met the person from a previous life who buried their bones for them.
When she thought of this, she suddenly saw the indistinct eyes of Ruan Shaonan in front of her, his deliberately drawn-out words and sneering lips. Somehow, her heart felt empty and unanchored, as if she had stepped into thin air on the way downstairs.
That night, when she returned to Ruan Shaonan’s villa, she saw the light in the study was on again. Wei Xi’s heart trembled for no reason. They hadn’t seen each other for many days, and she didn’t know whether he was avoiding her on purpose or whether he was really too busy.
When she reached the door to the study, her heart was still pounding. The door was ajar, so she pushed it open. But he wasn’t there. The study was lit by just one desk lamp, and beyond the dim circle of light, everything looked obscure and like another world. The computer was on, and the case was humming.
Wei Xi felt strange. He had never been so careless as to leave the computer on. She walked closer and saw a stack of photos on the desk from afar. Out of curiosity, she picked them up and looked at them. But at the moment their eyes met, she felt like she had been hit hard. Her vision went dark, and the photos in her hands fell one after the other, just like her world at that moment, collapsing with a bang.
She stood there for half a minute before kneeling on the carpet and picking up the photos one by one. The images on each one were so familiar, and the smiling faces on each one were so blindingly bright. When she finally came to the one she couldn’t identify, she felt as if someone had used a sharp blade to slice her body, and every inch of her skin was tingling with pain.
Just as she was in a daze, a pair of strong arms wrapped around her body. The man’s hot breath, mixed with a strong smell of alcohol, sprayed on her bare neck, and she couldn’t help but shiver.
‘Baby, you’re shaking…’ Ruan Shaonan kissed her neck, and the levity of his drunken state was chilling.
His arm was across her chest, and with his other hand he took the photo from her hand. The photo was perfectly captured, with the blue sea and orange sunset, a natural colour combination that was indescribably clever. She was sitting on the golden beach next to Chi Mo, and Chi Mo was leaning over, talking to her about something. She was smiling, shielding the sunset’s afterglow with her hand.
He put the photo in front of their faces, shook it, and smiled lightly, ‘You really look beautiful in this photo, I’ve never seen it before.’
Wei Xi’s mind went blank, ‘You’ve been sending someone to follow me?’
‘I was worried that the Lu family would jump the gun and sent someone to protect you. But I really didn’t expect to get a bonus. My little Wei Xi, you always manage to surprise me…’ He said the last few words fiercely, and suddenly bit her neck.
A sharp pain shot through her neck, and Wei Xi’s heart tightened almost to the point of losing blood. ‘Can I explain?’
‘Explain? Then you’d better think carefully about every word. You know I hate it when people lie to me. Didn’t you say that I could make my enemies die without a burial?‘
His hand was cold, his thumb pressed against her throat. She trembled her lips, unable to say a word.
’Scared?’ He turned her chin, his tone as light as ever. ’You shouldn’t be scared. The more scared you are, the quicker he’ll die.’
This is Ruan Shaonan, who can always use the most bland tone to set off a storm of emotions in someone’s heart; he can always kill someone with just one sentence.
“What do you want from me? Do you want me to take out my heart and show it to you? Or put a collar around my neck and chain me to your ankle? If you don’t even have the slightest bit of trust in me, why should we be together?’
She turned her face to look at him, her heart like an ancient tomb, a wilderness. However, Ruan Shaonan, who had always had a penetrating gaze, seemed not to understand the obvious meaning of her words.
‘What do I want?’ He shook his head hard, trying to clear his mind. His bright eyes were covered with a light mist, and suddenly his balance was off, and he lunged forward.
Wei Xi was unable to move as he pressed her to the carpet. He had really drunk too much today and was incredibly heavy.
‘Shaonan…’ Wei Xi patted his face, but the man in her arms seemed to have fallen asleep.
After a while, he raised his face from her neck, smiling foolishly, and kissed her on the cheek, ‘Wei Xi, you’re back…’
Wei Xi sighed to herself, he really was drunk. Ruan Shaonan’s drinking capacity was not bad, but he could never get drunk. Once he got drunk, he would become confused and unpredictable.
I remember that once, after a night of drinking, he somehow got a little tipsy and insisted on dragging her to the beach to watch the sunrise. He kept saying, ‘Weixi? No, no, Weixi is dawn. Weixi, then we won’t be able to see the sun, right? No, that’s not good luck. We’ll go watch it now.’
It was still the middle of the night, so where was the sunrise? Wei Xi was so annoyed that she had no choice but to agree. But when she got dressed and came out, he had already fallen sound asleep in bed. When she asked him about it the next day, he laughed while leaning over the bed, because he had actually been unaware of it at the time.
Alcohol is poison that passes through the intestines. Since that time, he had rarely touched alcohol because he had hurt his stomach. If he hadn’t been angry with her this time, he wouldn’t have gotten drunk like this.
When she thought about it, Wei Xi felt a little guilty. After all, it was she who had cheated first and hidden it later. If she had told him the truth at the time, why would he be like this today?
She wanted to explain to him, but the man in her arms was like a drunken cat, rubbing his face against hers like a piece of candy. If she wanted to say something, she would have to wait until he sobered up.
But the two of them couldn’t keep spending time on the floor, so Wei Xi tried to coax him, ‘Shaonan, let go of me first.’
Ruan Shaonan frowned, looked at her closely, and with a domineering air, asked, ‘Where do you want to go?’
Wei Xi lowered herself and apologised, ‘I’m not going anywhere. Look, the floor is so cold, we’ll get sick if we stay here for long. Can you let me go, please?’
The man’s tense body relaxed a little, and he nodded forcefully, ‘Exactly, what are we doing lying on the floor? It’s hard and uncomfortable here, let’s go back to the room.’
Wei Xi just let out a sigh of relief, but as soon as her body became lighter, he shook her up and carried her unsteadily. She was terrified, fearing that if he accidentally bumped into something, they would both fall and get bruised, or if he simply lost his grip, he would throw her straight off the second floor.
Fortunately, the study was not far from the bedroom, and he was quite familiar with the way. When Wei Xi was placed on the bed by him, she broke out in a cold sweat. Ruan Shaonan was also lying on the bed, pulling his tie uncomfortably, mumbling, ‘It’s so hot…’
Wei Xi wanted to get a towel to wipe his face, but before she could stand up, Ruan Shaonan pushed her back down with his hand, pinning her under him.
‘Where are you going?’ he asked, clearly impatient.
‘I went to get you a towel. You said you were hot, didn’t you?”
Wei Xi raised her hand to wipe the sweat from his nose, but he grabbed it and kissed her with his scorching lips, saying over and over, “I don’t want anything else, I just want you, just you…”
Wei Xi knew that he was drunk, so she naturally and gently went along with him, just hoping to get him to sleep quickly and get it over with.
However, when the man, drunk as he was, tore off her clothes in a flash, Wei Xi saw, in the darkness, eyes that were red as if they were bleeding.
She instinctively retreated, and it was only then that fear overwhelmed her. But where could she escape to in this small space, just a few steps away?
Clang! The bedside table lamp was swept to the ground by him. It was an antique porcelain table lamp that she liked, with exquisite craftsmanship and a white base with blue flowers. He bought it at a high price at an auction and placed it by the bed for her to enjoy alone.
At this moment, that expensive gift was shattered before her.
Chapter 23 One Night of Joy
The night seemed to go on forever…
Wei Xi felt as if she was sinking in water, her body heavy. She wanted to struggle, but she could not muster any strength. Her head was resting on the soft silk pillowcase, and she looked hazily at the distorted ceiling, as if she were looking at another world.
Suffering? Only now did Wei Xi truly understand the meaning of this word. It turned out to be the theory of relativity: someone’s minute is your day; someone’s day is your year; someone’s year is your century.
Her body was tensed like a bow, and she felt nothing throughout the whole process, except for the pain…the pain was so sharp, so bone-rending, so heart-wrenching.
Did she cry and beg him to let her go? She couldn’t remember.
She only vaguely knew that she had a period of unconsciousness, probably due to her old problem. She sank into a soft cloud and soon lost consciousness.
When she woke up, she saw herself like a sick child, sobbing helplessly in his arms. The glass of the French windows reflected their naked intertwined figures.
His head was buried in her heavy breasts, his hands pressed against her knees, and his strong waist swayed back and forth endlessly and ferociously. The once sweet rhythm became more and more unbearable. She couldn’t bear to watch anymore, so she turned her face away. She was already too sore to speak, but his lips were branded on her white neck, leaving a series of red and purple marks on that delicate skin.
It really hurt, so she used all her strength and bit his shoulder. The sudden pain in his shoulder made the man tremble. He looked down at her, smiling drunkenly, and held her chin down as he kissed her heavily. He spoke sweet nothings into her mouth, taking her desperate struggles as foreplay.
She shook her head in pain, her delicate white hands weakly pushing against his chest, their palms drenched in sweat, hoping to pull them apart. This terrifying, almost rapey, plunder was already too much for her to bear.
Feeling her resistance, he became a little irritated and clasped her lotus-like, crisp white wrists. It seemed like too much trouble, so he casually pulled his tie and, in a daze, tied the slender wrists to the bedpost. He pulled both hands together and tied a knot, which was painful and tight.
No! Wei Xi cried like a child, sad and distressed. She knew he was drunk, but could he treat her like this just because he was drunk? Just because she had lied to him, did all the good he had done for her in the past count for nothing?
Wei Xi looked at him through tear-filled eyes. She had never been so weak before. She murmured softly, her thin sobs indicating how sad she was at that moment. She had thought he would be considerate of her physical condition, but the man on top of her kissed away her tears and chewed on her pain, still wildly aroused and oblivious.
She heard herself screaming beneath him, her cries broken and her voice hoarse. But no matter how hard she bit her silver teeth in pain, why couldn’t he hear?
What did he say in her ear? She couldn’t hear anything clearly except her own rapid and painful breathing. She could only vaguely distinguish a few words, and he repeated them several times before she heard them.
He said, ‘Give it to me, give it to me…’
She listened indistinctly in the darkness, and before she knew it, cold tears had slipped down her eyes. City nights are always so long, and waking up at midnight only brings despair that is even colder than tears.
How long ago was this desolate state of mind? It was so long ago that she couldn’t remember. Only the crescent moon in the sky, still hanging in the azure clouds of memory, that pale golden crescent with a chill in the air, conjuring up the secrets of so many broken hearts?
Suddenly I remember an old movie from a long time ago. I vaguely remember it being a tragedy. The heroine finally cried out to her former lover, ‘I’m sorry, I can’t give you anything anymore, my love has dried up.’
He finally collapsed exhausted on top of her, calmed his breathing, and gazed at her jade-like face in the moonlight, sighing softly. The meticulous and lingering kisses seemed to hint at the man’s reluctance to let go and his desire for more.
Wei Xi’s hands were still tied by him, trembling like snowballs on his body. She didn’t know what else he wanted. But she could no longer give him anything.
She hadn’t dried up, she had just been drained by him…
The next morning, Ruan Shaonan slept until the sun was high in the sky, which was unheard of. He felt dizzy and his forehead throbbed with pain from the pulsating veins. Looking around, he was stunned, even though he was usually as steady as a mountain.
The chair had fallen over, the table lamp had broken, a corner of the mosquito net had been torn off, the curtains were on the carpet, there was broken glass all over the floor, and the large bedroom looked as if it had been hit by a huge tornado, a complete mess.
The bed was also in a mess, the silk sheets were twisted into a mess, the quilt was crumpled, and Weixi’s skirt had been torn in half…
He frowned, picked up the phone by the bed and dialed Wei Xi’s mobile number. But the music from ‘Doraemon’ started playing in the room, the same music he had replaced for her. After searching for a long time, he finally found it under the pillow, next to her asthma medicine.
As he looked at the blue medicine bottle, the events of last night gradually became clear.
What an insatiable night it was…
He remembered that she had fainted in the middle of the night as a result of an asthma attack. He had not taken her to the hospital. Something similar had happened before, and he knew what to do because he always kept emergency medication in the bedside cabinet in the bedroom.
When she woke up, she looked as if she had been soaked, and the bed sheet was soaked through.
Yes, asthma won’t kill you, but when you have an attack, it is unbearable. He didn’t know what he was thinking. That body was obviously already weak and could not withstand any more damage, but he just couldn’t let go. Hugging that soft body, he just wanted to disassemble the person in his arms and devour her clean.
In the heat of lust, he vaguely heard her lips saying ‘it hurts’ as she opened and closed them, heard her beg him in such a pitiful tone, saying ‘no’ over and over again. He saw her moonlit face, white as snow, her slightly furrowed brow, her eyes red with tears, as she tried to push him away but was easily restrained by his hands tied to the bed. He saw himself ignoring her pleas and pain, pushing into her again and again, making the whole bed shake, like the rough sea, and her powerless little boat being swallowed up by the waves.
He shouldn’t have done that. What had happened to him?
He quietly looked at the pill bottle, at the slideshows before him, one after the other, as if his soul had drifted to some high place, watching another version of himself coldly.
The landline by the bed hadn’t been hung up, and the music on his phone kept playing.
‘If you don’t even have the most basic trust in me, why are we together?’
“Why are we together?’
‘Why are we together?‘
’Together…”
The maid outside heard a noise from the bedroom and knocked on the door in a low voice, “Mr. Ruan, are you up? Do you need breakfast prepared?”
He suddenly grabbed Ruan Weixi’s phone and smashed it against the door, like a flash flood, like angry thunder, like a beast roaring with terrifying force.
The music stopped, and the phone was smashed to pieces…
With both hands, she picked up the drawing board, and the world had nothing to do with her – this was probably the most accurate portrayal of Lu Weixi at that moment.
In the morning light, she held a knife in her hand and carefully scraped away at the canvas, her movements so light that it seemed as if the canvas in front of her was her closest lover. In her eyes and heart, there was nothing but colours, shades, lines, and textures.
It was the brightest time of the day…
If she hadn’t woken up and seen that Weixi was wearing a pair of skinny jeans and a lacy, one-sided, openwork halter top – the kind that has no decoration on the front but you can see the whole back vaguely through the openwork pattern on the back. She had also neatly tied up her dark, indigo hair for convenience, which made her look even more like a person with a narrow back, narrow waist, narrow shoulders and a white neck.
It was rare to see her wear such a feminine outfit, and it was a pleasant surprise. She remembered that she had bought it from a street stall a few days ago for eight yuan. Perhaps it was because it was cheap that Ruxi had taken it as work clothes.
If she didn’t sigh with indignation, it was true that a beautiful person, even if they wear rags, is more attractive than others.
It’s New Year’s Eve in two days, and the streets are peaceful and bustling. If she hadn’t looked out of habit while brushing her teeth, she would have seen Ruan Shaonan’s silver-grey Pagani, like a polite gentleman, waiting downstairs.
She spat out the foam in her mouth, gargled, then walked out into the hall and said to the beautiful woman who was painting, ‘It’s been a week, you still let him hang out there? I’m saying, auntie, it’s almost enough, it’s New Year’s Eve…’
Wei Xi said nothing, still concentrating on her own work, as if she didn’t care about the outcome. She had been working on this oil painting for a whole week, and now was the most critical moment.
If she hadn’t shrugged her shoulders, even though they were like sisters, and an outsider in terms of relationships, Wei Xi wouldn’t have wanted to say anything, and she wouldn’t have asked too many questions.
If she hadn’t gone downstairs to buy breakfast. The moment the door closed, Wei Xi’s straight back finally collapsed, and like a student who had gone AWOL, she stared blankly at her painting.
The baroque oil painting had eerie, gloomy tones, and a cold-faced seraph with six wings soared above the clouds. At its feet was a raging fire, and in its hand was a long sword, the sharp blade pointing straight at the world. Wei Xi named the painting ‘Angels’ Fury’.
Wei Xi sighed and looked at the six-winged angel on the canvas. She couldn’t help but think that the world thinks angels are kind and pure, peaceful and generous. In fact, the world is wrong. Angels are God’s warriors, good at fighting and killing, and they hate humans.
Does every person and thing have two sides, with no absolute boundary between them? Just as there is only a fine line between madness and normality; just as God’s right hand is love and forgiveness, but His left hand is cunning and violence?
She put down the paintbrush, stood up, stretched her shoulders and neck, and walked over to the window without thinking. She saw his car still parked there, and her body trembled involuntarily. Her mind went back and forth, and she felt as if the sky were falling.
She thought back to that unspeakable night, and even after so long, she still felt a sense of fear. Those who have not experienced it themselves can hardly understand it: a child who has suffered from the cold in their childhood will feel cold for the rest of their lives; some wounds will never heal.
Wei Xi’s nose felt a little bit sore, and she felt like bursting into tears.
The winter in the south is faintly bright, and the sky is also faintly coloured, like the face of an ill-fated beauty, with a certain sadness. The fresh sunlight gently touched her face. She suddenly remembered that seven days ago, when he had come looking for her, it had also been such a beautiful day.
She hadn’t seen him, because she had been in bed, feverish and groggy, suffering as if she were dying. Every time she had a relapse, she would have a high fever. This time, she had been made even sicker by the injustice she had suffered that night and the fact that someone had indulged in sexual excesses. She was already weak from a congenital lack of energy and a lack of care in her later years, and she was on the verge of collapse.
She didn’t know what she had said to him, but she later heard that he had stood in the doorway for a while, then left without saying anything. Afterwards, someone sent over the things she usually used, all her painting tools, packed in a large box. They also sent the clothes, shoes and handbag she had bought a few days ago, and a new mobile phone.
Ru Fei looked at the new mobile phone and couldn’t help but marvel at it, and heartlessly teased her, ‘There’s no need to replace your mobile phone every few days just because you’re in pain over your girlfriend, is there? Are you afraid you’ll lose it? Or are you afraid that no one will know how rich he is?”
She sighed without saying a word, and only she knew the reason behind it. The mobile phone she had forgotten at the villa was probably smashed by him again. And she knew in her heart that what he wanted to smash the most in his heart… was actually her.
She left again without a word, which was tantamount to offending his biggest taboo. She remembered that last time she had inadvertently offended him, and he had just remained silent. Privately, however, he had silently strangled her, sealing off all her escape routes. Then he had looked at her calmly, like a trapped animal, with no way out.
Now, he was still silent. He spent all his time outside of work in the car park downstairs, but never looked for her again, not even once on the phone.
Just as he was lost in thought, he suddenly heard someone knocking on the door. If he didn’t have a key, who could it be at this hour?
When he looked behind the door peephole, he was surprised to see Wang Dongyang. When Xi opened the door, Assistant Wang still had his usual composed, businesslike manner. ‘Miss Lu…’ he said, ‘Mr. Ruan said you haven’t had breakfast yet, and he’s worried it might hurt your stomach, so he asked me to bring these Huaiyang dim sum over.’
He handed her an antique food box and continued, ‘Mr. Ruan also said that the Spring Festival is the day after tomorrow, so I asked what you would like to eat and if there is anything missing here. Tomorrow, he will have someone deliver it all together. He also said that after today, he will not come again, so Miss Lu can rest assured. When you have nothing to do, you should go out and walk around, because staying at home all the time will make you sick. Miss Lu doesn’t like to be followed, and he has remembered everything you don’t like, so it won’t happen again in the future. There is one more thing that Mr. Ruan asked me to tell you. Your younger sister, Lu Youxi, has already been taken from the Lu family and placed in a private sanatorium, where she is being cared for by specially-assigned personnel. If you agree to be her guardian, Mr. Ruan will find someone to help you handle the matter. If you want to send her abroad for treatment, he can also arrange that. It’s all up to you.”
After Wang Dongyang finished speaking, he stood at the door, like a dutiful soldier, waiting for the chief’s instructions.
Wei Xi was taken aback by his barrage of questions, and for a moment could not respond. She then remembered how shrewd and mean this person had been when they first met, and how this was in stark contrast to his ‘foolish loyalty’ at this moment. She could not help but smile.
“Please tell Mr. Ruan that I have taken note of what he said and will consider it carefully. There is nothing lacking here, so he does not need to worry,’
Wang Dongyang nodded in understanding, and before leaving, he looked back at Wei Xi again and finally said, ‘Miss Lu, I shouldn’t have said anything. But I really can’t help it. Don’t be angry with Mr. Ruan anymore. I have been with him for so long, and I have never seen him care about anyone this much. You should cherish your blessings… To be honest, he is not a person who appreciates fragrant flowers and cherishes jade. You should know this. Now he hasn’t said anything, but if it goes on for a long time, who knows what might happen. After all, you can’t leave him, so why do you have to force it with him? I’m afraid in the end, it’s you who will be hurt.”
After seeing Wang Dongyang off, Wei Xi placed the lunch box on the table and stared at it in a daze. The sunlight outside the window spilled over it, like a bowl of glutinous rice porridge that had been knocked over. She stroked the delicate filigree on the lunch box, and for a moment, she felt a sense of panic in her heart, not knowing what it was like.
They had been at loggerheads for so long that if anyone else had been in their shoes, they would have dismissed it as a mere flirtation. They had been at loggerheads for so long that if anyone else had been in their shoes, they would have dismissed it as a mere flirtation. They had been at loggerheads for so long that if anyone else had been in their shoes, they would have dismissed it as a mere flirtation. They had been at loggerheads for so long that if anyone else had been in their shoes, they would have dismissed it as a mere flirtation. They had been at loggerheads for so long that if anyone else had been in their shoes, they would have dismissed it as a mere flirtation. They had been
Anyone who doesn’t know the story will just think that she has become a princess and is now arrogant and spoiled. But how can an outsider know her full heart of sorrow and grievances? She is unable to tell even her closest friends about everything that makes her sad and afraid, and she can’t even tell her own sister. Who can she tell?
Outsiders only know him as a legend, seeing only his glory and splendour, admired by the masses, humble and courteous. Only she knows the wounds behind those masks, the hatred beneath the glory, the bloodshed in the halo. Only she has personally experienced his occasional hideousness and terror, his ferocity.
He had whispered tenderly in her ear that he would treasure her above all else, in heaven and on earth; and he had squeezed her chin, threatening her without a trace of emotion. His dark, silent eyes, with their dark pupils, concealed a beast within; his eternal suspicion of humanity, his distrust of people’s hearts, his uncertainty; his intense, outrageous, naked lust hidden beneath his dainty clothes…
Thinking about this, Weixi bit her fingers one after the other, feeling a sense of foreboding. She really couldn’t be sure if the person who had demanded so much of her that night was really the warm and gentle handsome young man from seven years ago.
Looking at the lacquered red lunch box, she opened it casually. Naturally, it contained all her favourite foods, each delicacy and each item thoughtful.
“Whatever you don’t like, he’s remembered, and it won’t happen again…’
Wei Xi of course understood that there was another meaning behind these words. But the more so, the more scared she was. She just felt like a tiger swearing to her that it would never eat meat again.
But has anyone ever seen a tiger that doesn’t eat meat?
And she thought about her younger sister, You Xi, who was in his hands at the moment. Wei Xi didn’t know what kind of thoughts Ruan Shaonan had when he asked her to come out of the Lu family. Threat? Comfort? Apologize? Entice?
She guessed that she had exhausted herself trying to figure out what he was thinking. But no matter what he was thinking, it was a brilliant move. Thinking about Youxi, she could not sit idly by.
Ruan Shaonan was now truly in control, sitting on the world. The ridiculous thing is that the Lu family has sold a crippled daughter like this, so cowardly, and in return, can they get a few more days of peace?
The dim sum in her hand suddenly fell to the ground, and the fragrant and soft object naturally fell to pieces.
Wei Xi curled up in a chair, staring at the broken pieces of her ‘corpse’, her head buried between her knees, at a loss.
Chapter 24: Reunion
Tomorrow is the New Year. When Wei Xi saw that her home was empty, she couldn’t help but feel a little remorseful. Why did she have to be so stubborn yesterday and say that she didn’t lack anything?
In fact, neither she nor Ru Fei really liked the New Year. In fact, orphans don’t really like the New Year. Usually, she doesn’t feel that she is different from other people, but whenever it’s a holiday, it highlights her loneliness.
Her and Ruan Shaonan’s New Year’s plan was to have a big New Year’s dinner at his beach house, where there was plenty of room to set off fireworks. Of course, they would invite Ru Fei, who had never been there before. Unfortunately, neither woman could cook, but that was fine, because the cook, Mrs. Wang, could cook as well as a five-star chef. She had also learned to make a few dishes that were barely acceptable.
After New Year’s Eve, Ruan Shaonan also had a few days of public holidays, and they could go on a short trip. Ruan Shaonan likes to see the sea and has always said that he wants to take Wei Xi to Tahiti, so that this future artist can see this legendary ‘place closest to heaven’ and enjoy the soft golden beaches and hot sunshine of the southern hemisphere.
Unfortunately, overnight, everything had changed.
Wei Xi perked up and decided to go out and buy some New Year’s goods. It’s Chinese New Year, after all, and you have to celebrate.
The street was as crowded as she had imagined. Weixi went to the nearby supermarket. The huge place was packed with people because of the New Year sales. She was caught in the middle of a group of housewives. Because there were so many people, everyone was pushing and shoving. In the end, she just bought a few kinds of cooked food, two bags of dumplings, a bottle of wine, and their favourite chestnut cake.
As she passed the women’s products section, she saw that sanitary napkins were also on sale, so she bought two big bags even though she already had some at home.
As she was carrying her shopping bags and about to cross the road, a car rushed over. Wuxi wanted to give way, but the car stopped in front of her.
Two men in black got out of the car. One took the bags from her, while the other said politely, ‘Miss, the master wants to see you.’
The Lu family ancestral home is built at the foot of Nanshan, which is known as ‘the phoenix perched on the sunset’, and is the ancestral property of the Lu family. The garden is full of Qing Dynasty buildings, all of which are small buildings made of wood and earth, with green bricks, dark tiles, flying eaves and curved walls. Pavilions and towers can be seen everywhere, and the environment is extremely quiet.
Wei Xi remembered that across from the quaint garden was Nanshan’s most famous attraction, Danfeng Ridge, and at the foot of the ridge was a lake of turquoise water. Every autumn, the ridge was covered in red maple leaves, and wherever the sun shone, there was nothing but a sea of fiery red and blood-red leaves.
Two men in black respectfully led the way, and as Wei Xi walked along, she reminisced, as if she had returned from this life to her previous one.
“Master, the young lady has arrived,’
In the spacious hall of the old mansion, Wei Xi saw her father, whom she had not seen for seven whole years. But the man in the wheelchair, with grey hair at the temples and a wan complexion, was a world apart from the unbeatable dictator she remembered.
In the hall, in addition to Lu Zixu, there were also two women sitting there whom she had never seen before. They were both in their thirties, with good looks but haggard. A five or six year old boy and a three or four year old girl were sitting next to the two women. Both children had big, dark, shiny eyes and were extremely cute. At the moment, they were just timidly looking at her, afraid to say anything.
Wei Xi sat down in the chair, and someone poured a cup of strong tea for her. Wei Xi didn’t move, quietly looking at the beautiful woman and her child in front of her, not knowing what to make of it for a moment.
Lu Zixu was a little excited when he saw Wei Xi and said, ‘You really look like your mother.’
Wei Xi smiled, ‘After all these years, I’m impressed that you still remember.’
The man’s expression stiffened, and after a long sigh, he said, ‘I know, you’ve been holding a grudge against me for what happened back then…’
Wei Xi couldn’t help but interrupt him, ‘Mr. Lu, I don’t want to chat with you. If you have something to say, please get to the point. If not, I’ll just drink my tea and leave. I have someone waiting for me. If I’m late, I’m afraid someone will think too much.”
Wei Xi’s words hinted at him not to act rashly. Although she knew in her heart that if Ruan Shaonan really knew her movements, she wouldn’t be sitting here right now. This trick of “defeating the enemy by feigning weakness” was taught by Ruan Shaonan. The key is to keep a poker face. If she shows the slightest sign of weakness, she’ll be finished.
Lu Zixu felt a little embarrassed, and coughed a few times before saying, ‘I shouldn’t have come to you, but for the sake of your eldest brother’s and second eldest brother’s children, and for the sake of leaving the Lu family with the last bit of bloodline, I have no choice but to beg you with all my face. Weixi, please be kind and give these two children a way to live.’
Weixi sighed silently, really not understanding why everyone thought she had the ability to change the world and save the masses.
Wei Xi looked at him calmly, at her so-called father, and couldn’t help but say lightly, ‘I’m sorry, I’ve already said it. I can’t help in this matter. I’m never the one who makes decisions, so it would be more practical for you to beg him directly. But…’ She smiled as she said this, ‘I think you’d better not beg, because he has said more than once that he will definitely kill them all. What you did to the Ruan family back then is what they are doing to you now, which is only fair.’
Lu Zixu was so moved that he burst into tears. He said with remorse, ‘This is all my fault from my younger days. I was inhumane when I was at the peak of my power. I drove the widow and orphan out of their home, and now I have no children to care for me in my old age. Ahem…’ He coughed as he finished speaking.
He looked up at his daughter with pleading eyes, ‘Weixi, please consider it a good deed. Ruan Shaonan even wanted to take Yuxi in order to please you. This shows how much he values you. You should at least try. Even if it doesn’t work out, I’ve done my best, and I can die in peace when I’m lying in my coffin.”
When the two children saw their grandfather in such a state, they immediately ran over and surrounded the old man’s knees, crying loudly. The two beautiful women also followed suit, their eyes red with tears.
Wei Xi silently watched this tragic scene before her, knowing in her heart that the once-proud man would never have bowed so low to her, his abandoned daughter, if there had been any way out.
The Lu family had truly fallen apart. The era of Lu Zixu had long passed, and now it was just a sad footnote in the history of this city. He had been such a powerful figure back then, and now he had ended up in such a miserable state.
It’s not that he’s not pitiful…
‘For so many years, I’ve had one question that I’ve never been able to figure out,’ Wei Xi said, looking at her tearful father. ‘What was she thinking the moment she was lying next to you, slitting her wrists? What kind of strength made her inflict such cruelty on herself, to the point of leaving you? Every time I think about it, I toss and turn, unable to sleep. Maybe you know the answer, can you tell me?’
Wei Xi’s tone was calm, but Lu Zixu looked at her with a pitiful expression, as if begging her silently.
Wei Xi pretended not to see, ‘Can you tell me, when you woke up that morning and saw your wife in a pool of blood, were you afraid? Over the years, have you ever dreamed of her? Did she speak to you in your dreams? What did she say to you?’
‘No, no…stop.’
“If you don’t want to say, then let me tell you. She told you that she died a horrible death. She asked you why you did this to her. She was covered in blood, and she held out her bony wrist in front of you, saying that she missed you and wanted you to join her in death. Am I right, Mr Lu?‘
’No, I didn’t harm her,’ Lu Zixu trembled with fear. ’She didn’t love me, she wouldn’t let me touch her, and she would rather die than stay with me. But I loved her, she was the only woman I’ve ever loved in my life.’
‘Love?’ Wei Xi almost sneered, “So your love is to strangle a woman’s hands with a belt and rape her? Mr. Lu, your love is truly great.”
Lu Zixu’s eyes widened in vain, his face full of fear and disbelief.
Wei Xi looked at his surprised expression and asked doubtfully, ’Have you always thought that no one knows your secrets that can’t be seen in the light? Haha, you really are too confident in yourself. How could there be secrets in the Lu family mansion? Your servants, your butler, your ex-wife’s children, all of them are observant people. She was your wife, but you let her live in this big house without any dignity. In the end, even a little girl who served tea and water dared to bully her. It was you and the rest of the Luk family who slowly tortured her to death, cutting her up inch by inch. And now you’re telling me that her death had nothing to do with you? Mr. Luk, this is perhaps the biggest joke I’ve ever heard in my life.’
Wei Xi spoke quietly, these words having weighed on her heart for seven years, seven whole years.
During those seven years, she had imagined today’s scene countless times, every movement, every glance, every smile, every expression… She thought she would cry, but in the end not a single tear came. Her calm tone did not even show any obvious ups and downs, as if an outsider were relating a past event that had nothing to do with her.
Lu Zixu’s face was ashen, the two beautiful women looked at each other, and the two children looked on innocently with wide, innocent eyes.
The little boy tugged at his mother’s hem and whispered, ‘Mom, what does rape mean?’
The woman immediately covered the child’s mouth. The words of a child were innocent, but they pierced the hearts of adults, opening up the most untouchable abscesses, spilling blood and reeking of putrefaction.
Chapter 25: The Warmth of the Lotus Bed
Wei Xi sat on a bus stop bench, holding a cup of hot coffee in her hands, like a statue, watching the comings and goings of the street.
When she left the Lu family, Lu Zixu coughed so hard that he shook his intestines and lungs, and soon vomited a mouthful of blood. Judging from the situation, I’m afraid he won’t last long.
When a person is about to die, their words are kind. Having reached this point, this man in his fifties is still just pleading for his grandchildren.
He brought the whole family along today and played the family card, perhaps thinking that he had some chance of winning. But he never expected that his actions would be undone by Wei Xi’s ‘removing the bottom board’ and that he would lose face in front of his juniors.
“Don’t be fooled by the illusions before you. The more cunning an opponent is, the more they will pretend to be pitiful. Whoever softens their heart will die first.’ This is what he used to tell all his children, but he probably didn’t expect her to remember.
There are too many lies in this world, and you can’t extract a single truth from them even if you smelt them with Kyushu’s finest iron. The truth is always beyond perception, and lies are always the order of the day.
Lu Zixu deserved to be punished, but Wei Xi didn’t mean to make him a pariah. She really didn’t understand why a man who talked about love all the time could use such cruel means to torment the woman he loved.
Because he is superior? Because he is arrogant? Because of his innate sense of male superiority? Because of his primitive aggression? Or is it just the hormonal explosion of a male animal and the sense of superiority that power gives?
Just as she is thinking, she suddenly sees a couple not far away, a man and a woman, arguing. The sound is loud, and Wei Xi vaguely hears that it seems to be the woman questioning where the man went yesterday.
Wei Xi couldn’t help shaking her head. It was just another messy relationship, and she felt sorry for the woman. The man had a wretched face, a flat haircut, small eyes, and a foul mouth. His attitude was extremely bad.
After a few unpleasant words, the man cursed and turned around and left. The woman went to pull the man’s arm, but he slapped her hard in the face, knocking her to the ground. Not satisfied, he kicked her hard in the stomach.
The woman lay on the ground, covering her stomach and crying like a pig, ‘Stop, stop, I’m pregnant with your child.’
But the man wouldn’t stop, his face full of ferocity, ‘Bitch, I’m hitting you!’
The passers-by either looked on indifferently or silently walked around. A few idle onlookers gathered around, neither dissuading nor calling the police, neither helping nor dispersing.
Wei Xi looked at everything in front of her and really didn’t understand.
Humans have gone through countless changes, from crawling to upright, from lowly to advanced, from animal to human. Such a meticulous and long process, why did they degenerate to this in one night?
The coldness of the human heart and the decline of the world are needless to say. But in this world, why do so many men bully women who are physically far inferior to them?
Even animals know how to protect their females and care for the young, but those people have degenerated to a level worse than animals?
There is nothing to be done…
Wei-xi looked around. There was a construction site by the roadside. She walked over, picked up a brick she could carry, and then walked through the crowd of onlookers, and smashed it hard on the head of the beast who was fighting with all his might…
When Ruan Shaonan and his lawyer arrived at the police station to find Wei Xi, she was sitting on a chair with her knees in her hands, and a policewoman was taking her statement. Opposite her, across a table, sat a man with a bandage on his head and blood all over his face.
The man stood up suddenly, pointed at Wei Xi and shouted, ‘Police officer, this bitch hit me, I want to sue her!’
The young policeman shouted in a stern voice, ‘Sit down! You hit a woman on the street and you still have the nerve to argue? Watch your mouth, this is a police station, not your home.’
Wei Xi lifted her eyes and looked straight at him. The man was still spewing abuse, ‘Damn it, bitch, what are you looking at? I’ll gouge your eyes out if you keep looking.’
The young policeman snapped his fingers on the table and shouted, ‘Shut up! If you scream again, I’ll charge you with disorderly conduct in a public place.’
Ruan Shaonan frowned, and Wei Xi turned her face to meet his cold gaze. She looked at him like that, but as if she hadn’t seen anything.
It was already 8 o’clock in the evening when they left the police station. Wei Xi was in a daze after she walked out of the police station. Ruan Shaonan helped her into the car, and she closed her eyes as soon as she got in. He thought she was in shock and didn’t ask any questions.
The lawyer came over and briefed him on the case: ‘Someone testified that the man beat someone up in the street first, and Ms. Lu was justifiably defending herself, even if her methods were inappropriate. Besides, he wasn’t seriously injured, so Ms. Lu doesn’t need to go to court, and a private settlement is not a problem.’
Ruan Shaonan gave a slight smile, lit a cigarette, and then spoke after a long while, ‘You are Yi Tianxin’s newly hired legal advisor. If this kind of case has to be settled privately, why would I still need you?’
The lawyer immediately understood, ‘I will contact the woman who was beaten and teach her to sue the man for intentional injury, which caused the victim to have a miscarriage. This can be sentenced to between three and ten years in prison.’
Ruan Shaonan’s lips curled slightly, smiling without saying a word. The lawyer thought for a moment and then said, ‘Add a hospital certificate stating that the victim will be infertile for life, which is considered to cause disability, and the sentence can be increased to more than ten years.’
Ruan Shaonan nodded and said, ‘Thank you for your hard work.’ He added, ‘Remember, Miss Lu cannot have a criminal record. We are going on a trip abroad in a few days, and I don’t want this to ruin her mood.’
“I understand. Mr. Ruan, don’t worry, Miss Lu’s record will be guaranteed to be cleaner than a piece of white paper.’
Ruan Shaonan dismissed the lawyer, returned to the car, and asked what she wanted to eat when he saw that the person curled up in the car had opened her eyes.
Wei Xi shook her head and said, ‘I’m very tired, I want to go home.’
Ruan Shaonan told the driver, ‘Go to Xieyang Lane.’ Then he turned to the person next to him and said, ‘Their rock sugar bird’s nest and triple-headed abalone are very good. No matter how tired you are, you have to eat something before going home. Sleeping on an empty stomach is bad for your health.’
Wei Xi didn’t say anything else, and she leaned over to one side, sinking into the shadows of the car like a white jade statue. She didn’t move or speak. Occasionally, the neon lights outside the window shone on her pale face, flickering and fading in and out.
Perhaps it was because the bird’s nest here was really delicious. Wei Xi had never been able to get used to it, and it felt like she was swallowing someone else’s saliva. This time, however, she drank the entire bowl, contrary to her usual habit. Ruan Shaonan ordered another bowl of abalone congee for her, and she didn’t say anything, just bowed her head and drank it all up in silence.
When they went out again, it was already late and the wind was cold. Ruan Shaonan took off his overcoat and put it on Wei Xi, and warmed her hands for her. He found that she was still shivering badly, and couldn’t help but scold her, ‘Why did you go out dressed so lightly? If you catch a cold and have a fever again, aren’t you just asking for trouble?’
Wei Xi felt cold at first, but when she put on his overcoat and was warmed by the heat, she sneezed instead. Coupled with the drowsiness after the meal and the tossing and turning all afternoon, she gradually could no longer keep her eyes open and fell asleep in the car.
When the car stopped, she was still in a daze, oblivious to everything, and her head was also dizzy. She smelled a familiar fragrance in her nose, and her body felt light as she was lifted up.
The sudden feeling of being suspended in the air made her feel inexplicably scared. She felt as if she were floating on a cloud, but also as if she were sinking in the water, and her whole body was plummeting, plummeting… into the bottomless abyss.
In a daze, someone placed her on the bed. Her body felt as if it were being weighed down by something heavy, and she wanted to struggle, but she couldn’t muster any strength. Suddenly, it seemed as if she had no hands, no feet, and only a bare torso left.
She felt as if she had returned to that night of excruciating pain, the night when she first belonged to him. She was too tired to lift her hands, but he lifted her waist, placed a pillow under her body, raised her knees, and took her in such a direct and cruel way.
At that moment, his eyes were so ruthless and his expression so cold. She saw her own face reflected in the glazed ceiling, such a pale and painful face.
The mattress made a creaking sound, a familiar sound, but one that was so terrifying she wished she could die immediately. She wanted to cover her ears, but she couldn’t move. She wanted to cry, but she couldn’t make a sound.
The whole time, all she felt was pain. The pain was so excruciating that she almost wanted to empty her insides out, to turn herself into an empty shell. No soul, no flesh, no blood, no memories… If she did that, would the pain stop?
Is that so?
The pain was so intense that she seemed to have called Ruofei, but she was too far away to hear her helpless cry for help.
Vaguely, she seemed to have called Ruan Shaonan, but he had gone. The young man in the snow-white clothes silently left her and disappeared forever.
Chapter 26 Even animals have something they want to protect
When Wei-xi woke up in the morning, she looked at the beautiful ceiling and stared blankly for a while. It was Ruan Shaonan’s bedroom.
So last night…
Wei-xi looked around. There was no one around. The silk pillowcase was crumpled, as were the bed sheets. She was sitting naked on Ruan Shaonan’s king-size bed. Beneath her was a cold, slippery feeling. There was a habit of putting a blue asthma medicine on the bedside table. The bedroom was filled with a fine sweet fragrance.
Like an ignorant child, she looked around stupidly, but she knew the changes in her body.
It turned out that last night was not a dream.
Wei Xi held the quilt tightly, huddled in the corner of the bed like a young wife suffering abuse, her heart empty and without a home. At this moment, her fingers and hair ends all smelled of him, her legs were weak and she had no strength, and even her arms felt weak. Perhaps it had been a while since she had experienced this, and her body ached, her head hurt, and even her temples throbbed. And the man who had made love to her several times last night obviously had also been away from love for a long time, and the battle scars he had left on her body could be described as ‘wounded and scarred’.
Wei Xi hugged her arms and shivered, shaking.
But how did she get here?
Wei Xi hugged her head and tried hard to remember, but it was like a dream, and she couldn’t remember much. She felt dizzy and faint, and vaguely remembered leaving the Lu family mansion, going to the bus stop, and then…what happened next?
She couldn’t remember, as if there were gaps in her memory.
Then, she followed Ruan Shaonan to the restaurant for dinner. Then in the car, he gave her his overcoat. But after that…what happened after that?
She couldn’t remember, as if someone had taken a white eraser and erased those two memories right down the middle.
Biting her finger in frustration, she wondered if she was starting to grow old. How else could she be so forgetful in her early twenties?
She was sitting on the bed, lost in thought, when the door suddenly opened and the owner of the bedroom walked in. He looked like he had just taken a shower, wearing only a towel around his waist, with wet hair that was still dripping.
‘Yesterday I felt like you had a fever, why are you awake so early? Don’t you want to sleep a little longer?’ Ruan Shaonan placed the cold medicine by the bedside and leaned down to kiss her as usual.
Wei Xi saw his bare chest, the white bath towel, the six well-trained diamond-shaped abs, the powerful arms… Her heart contracted, and she couldn’t help but turn her face to the side. Ruan Shaonan’s lips were pressed against her hair.
The man seemed a little surprised, stroked her hair, and asked softly, ‘What’s wrong? Didn’t everything go well last night?’
‘Last night?’ Wei Xi looked at him in confusion, ‘I only remember leaving here a week ago. You got drunk that night, and I was sick for a long time after that. I don’t remember anything else.’
Wei Xi saw him stiffen, and she thought he was going to get angry. Instead, he wrapped his arms around her and she was completely in his embrace.
‘My little Weixi, you’re deliberately torturing me like this, aren’t you?’ He sighed above her head. ’I really want to attribute what happened that night to drunken indiscretion. But I know that’s not the whole story. These days, I’ve been thinking a lot about what happened between us, and how things got to this state. I know that I should have given you more space. Even if you were hiding something from me, I shouldn’t have been angry with you. But that night, I really didn’t mean to… I can’t explain it to you, I just…’ At this point, he, a big man, blushed and stammered for a long time, finally just saying, “Do you understand what I’m saying?”
What did he want her to understand when he spoke so indistinctly?
Weiwei had never seen him like this before, stammering like a young boy in love. She couldn’t help smiling inwardly, and even if she felt aggrieved, her heart eased a little.
In fact, she knew even if he didn’t say it, because she had asthma, he often couldn’t get his fill when they were together. And he was a physically strong, energetic man, and the decision-maker of a group, so he was under more pressure than others, and his needs in that regard were also stronger. If the woman sleeping next to him was also healthy, the mutual affectionate lovemaking would naturally be a pleasure, but she was not.
She had heard him get up in the night more than once and go to the bathroom to take a cold shower. Wei-xi knew how hard that was for a strong man.
Ruan Shaonan saw that she was silent and thought that she was still angry, so he couldn’t help but say, ‘Wei-xi, yesterday you were willing to come back with me, and we were so intimate, I thought you had forgiven me, but this morning, why has it changed again?’
‘I really don’t remember,’ Wei Xi whispered in his arms.
Ruan Shaonan sighed, “You still blame me. I really lost my temper that day after drinking. Normally, I’m not like that. You should remember, shouldn’t you?”
That was true.
It was because he was worried about her health that he could never let go during sex. If he was too strong, she would feel pain; if he was too weak, he would feel pain himself. He was afraid of making her sweat, for fear of exhausting her. He was afraid of being too intense, for fear of making her heart race. Even when they kissed, he restrained himself, for fear of depriving her of fresh air for too long. He never dared to put flowers or aromatherapy in the bedroom, for fear of her developing an allergy if she smelled them.
He took care of all these asthma-related details, no matter how troublesome or trivial they were, and never complained. In fact, if you think about it, he was considerate and thoughtful in everything, whether it was about sex or other things, as long as it had to do with her.
He had always done such a good job, and if you just use that drunken misbehaviour from one night to conclude that he doesn’t cherish her, it’s really a bit unfair to him.
‘If you hadn’t been drunk that night, I could have explained to you. Me and Chi Mo, it’s not what you think.”
He stroked her forehead with his chin, ’I know you two aren’t doing anything, I just never understood why you lied to me. You should know, in this world, the only person I trust is you. It doesn’t matter if anyone else lies to me, but you, I can’t stand it.’
Wei Xi shook her head and sighed, ‘Maybe I’m just overthinking it. I’m always worried that you’ll make things difficult for him because of this. He’s not a bad person. We’ve known each other for so long, and he’s always taken good care of me. He’s never acted in the slightest bit of a frivolous manner. I don’t want you to harm everyone for no reason because of a momentary impulse on his part. I’ll feel guilty for the rest of my life.’
Ruan Shaonan smiled and held up Wei Xi’s face, ‘So in your heart, I’m the kind of person who would harm people for no reason.’
Wei Xi realised that she had used the wrong words and immediately explained, ‘Don’t get me wrong, that’s not what I meant.’
‘No need to explain, I understand.’
Ruan Shaonan hugged her and comforted her, ‘Wei Xi, I know that you don’t approve of the way I do things now. But I’m not someone who can’t tell right from wrong or who doesn’t understand gratitude.’
He took her hand and placed it on his chest, ‘I promise you that no matter what you do in the future, I will never hurt you. My hands, my body, my heart, my soul – they will only protect you, cherish you and respect you. You don’t need to be afraid of the money and status that I have fought for with my life. They will only shelter you from the wind and rain, and make you the happiest woman in the world.”
He bowed his head and kissed her. Between their lips, he said, ’Weixi, please believe that even a beast has something it wants to protect.’
The two of them sat in the dining room having breakfast. The crabmeat and shrimp dumplings made by Wang’s wife were still as authentic as ever. Weixi had always liked them, but unfortunately, after New Year’s Eve, she would also have to go home for the New Year, and would have to cook for herself if she wanted to eat anything else.
While they were eating, Ruan Shaonan told her about the incident yesterday when she had hit someone, but Weixi looked confused.
Ruan Shaonan laughed at her, ‘You beat him until his head was bleeding, you can’t really have forgotten.’
Wei Xi shook her head, ‘I really can’t remember. Maybe I’ve been thinking too much nonsense lately, and I’ve become foolish.’
Ruan Shaonan looked at her, ‘But you really surprised me. I really didn’t expect that you, who are usually so quiet, could be so fierce.’
Wei Xi looked at him and said, ‘You’ve forgotten, I grew up in an orphanage.’
After dinner, Wei Xi curled up on the sofa with a teacup in her hands and watched TV. Ruan Shaonan called to book a flight, as the two of them wanted to go on their planned trip after New Year’s Eve. Although it was a few days late, it wasn’t a problem.
Wei Xi used the remote control to find her favourite programme, when suddenly she saw a piece of social news with the following subtitles: Taihuang Group’s Lu Zixu, confirmed to have terminal lung cancer.
A reporter stood in front of the hospital entrance, pointing at the door and saying, ‘This is the hospital where Lu Zixu, the chairman of Taihuang Group, was admitted yesterday.’
Then the camera flashed, showing Lu Zixu being admitted to the hospital.
As soon as the group got off the car, a group of reporters carrying weapons rushed up, and in an instant, the flashlights went off one after the other.
“Mr. Lu, your eldest son Lu Zexi has been sentenced to death at the first trial. Will you support him in appealing? Has the Lu family already given up on him?’
‘Mr Lu, there are rumours that your eldest daughter hanged herself because you refused to pay the money she needed to cover her debts. Is this true?‘
’Mr Lu, your youngest son Lu Renxi is still at large. The building he constructed collapsed due to poor quality, killing several people. How will the Lu family compensate the victims‘ families? Will you cut off all ties with Lu Renxi to avoid responsibility?’
‘Mr Lu…’
“Mr Lu…’
Lu Zixu was sitting in a wheelchair, wearing a mask and looking emaciated. The two daughters-in-law of the Lu family were nowhere to be seen, and he was accompanied only by a young nanny and a few hired hands. They were alone and vulnerable, avoiding the reporters’ siege and questioning.
These reporters, whose eyes are usually like a mirror, are not even kind to celebrities who are in the limelight, let alone these old, weak women and children. In this world, it is indeed easy to add icing to the cake, but difficult to give timely help.
Wei Xi put down the remote control and went out onto the balcony to enjoy the view. Ruan Shaonan put down the phone and brought her a scarf to put around her shoulders.
Wei Xi thought he would pull her back like a parent pulling an unruly child, but instead he just hugged her from behind and asked, ‘What are you thinking about, standing all alone in the wind?’
Wei Xi smiled, knowing that he was afraid that she still remembered the past and was being overly cautious at the moment. He just said, ‘It’s nothing…did you book the tickets?’
‘There’s no suitable flight. We might as well ask Luo Chuan to lend us his private jet. He’ll be staying in Beijing for the whole Spring Festival anyway, so it’s just sitting there idle.’
Wei Xi hesitated a little, ‘We…really have to go?’
Ruan Shaonan looked at her strangely, ‘Didn’t we already agree?’
Wei Xi sighed and finally decided to give it a try. ‘Yesterday, I went to the Lu family mansion.’
‘Oh?’ Ruan Shaonan only raised an eyebrow slightly.
Wei Xi had thought that he would ask a follow-up question, but he didn’t say another word. She had to grit her teeth and say, ‘I was there and met my brothers’ two children, both very young and still ignorant…‘
’So?”
She could already detect the displeasure in his voice. The Lu family has always been a hidden illness between them. But she really couldn’t not tell him about the two children, so she simply made up her mind, ‘You should have heard just now, your enemy has already suffered retribution. The Lu family is now ruined, and only these two children are left. They are only three or four years old, just like youxi, and they pose no threat to you. Can you…’
Ruan Shaonan interrupted her, ‘Weixi, who do you think you are?’
‘What?”
He sneered at the top of her head, “Who do you think you are? Xi Shi? Diaochan? Or Wang Zhaojun? Why did you come back yesterday? You used your body to bargain with me for the safety of the Lu family, didn’t you? You were so aggrieved, and I coaxed you for a week, but you never gave me a kind word. But yesterday, for the sake of those people, you bent your body and made love to me all night? It was really hard on you.”
He could actually put it so bluntly. Wei Xi’s body trembled like chaff, and she bit her lips, unable to say a word.
Seeing her so hesitant to speak, Ruan Shaonan’s anger flared even more. He turned her around and pinched her chin. ‘Aren’t you usually quick-witted? Why aren’t you speaking now? If you’re unhappy, just say so. Why are you always putting on this unruffled appearance for everyone to see?’
Wei Xi took a deep breath and looked at him with cold eyes. ‘If I had even an ounce of blood in my veins, I would have slapped you in response to those words. But you’re right, just think of me as coming to “reconcile”. Now I beg you, for the sake of the fact that I spent the night with you, let the two children go and leave the widow and orphan a way to survive. Don’t let them be trampled on like me, okay?’
Chapter 27 The price of defying the dragon’s scales
On New Year’s Eve, just after the stroke of midnight, someone started setting off fireworks. The brilliant fireworks bloomed like angry flowers, one after the other, on the blue velvet sky.
Wei Xi was sitting alone on the sofa in the living room watching TV when Mrs. Wang came over and asked her, ‘Miss Lu, would you like me to make you something to eat?’
She shook her head, ‘No, it’s late, you should go and get some rest.’
Wang’s wife sighed, ‘Mr. Ruan is really something, leaving you here alone during the New Year, so cold and lonely.’
Wei Xi smiled wryly in resignation, ‘He’s probably busy with something. It’s okay, I’m fine on my own.’ Then she added, ‘Wang’s wife, your Huaiyang cuisine is really delicious, just like my mother makes.’
Wang Sheng had always loved Wei Xi dearly, and seeing her so sensible, her heart felt even more pity for her. She said with a sense of duty, ‘If you like it, I’ll cook it for you tomorrow. When Mr. Ruan comes back, I’ll tell him to go hungry.’
Wei Xi was amused by this kind-hearted old lady, and when her heart grew sad, she threw herself into her arms, ‘Wang Sheng, you’re so good to me, just like my mother.’
Wang Sheng couldn’t help but sigh, ‘Poor child, you’re all alone, without parents or any brothers or sisters to look after you. Mr. Ruan usually treats us very well. I thought he was a stable person, unlike those rich playboys who are frivolous and impetuous. I never thought… Alas, how could he bear to treat such a good girl like an angel so coldly?’
After midnight, the party became even more boring. Mrs Wang was getting on in years, so after sitting with her for a while, I went back to bed. Wei Xi watched the TV for a while longer, then switched it off.
The large room fell silent in an instant. Wei Xi wasn’t sleepy, so she lay on the sofa in her clothes, looking out through the tall French windows at the dark sky, which was not a single star.
Only at this moment did her heart become despondent, as if she were hanging somewhere, empty and without a foothold. His eyes as he left, his cold expression, the bulging veins on his forehead… all of it seemed to warn her of how angry he was.
Had she been wrong? Had she really become arrogant and spoiled because she thought he was such a heartless, manipulative man, but treated her so differently? Had she thought she could say and do anything she liked, when no one else could?
‘A dragon has a vulnerable spot that will make it angry if touched,’ Wei Xi vaguely remembered this being a story from Han Feizi. The general meaning is: the dragon has a one-foot-long inverted scale at the bottom of its throat, and if a person touches the dragon’s inverted scale, it will definitely be hurt. The monarch also has an inverted scale, so the person lobbying to persuade and recommend must never offend the monarch’s inverted scale. Otherwise, not only will it not succeed, but it will also be difficult to save their own lives.
Wei Xi sighed. It was obvious that she was not a good lobbyist. However, with just one sentence, she had offended the dragon king’s ‘inverted scale’.
Thinking about all this nonsense, she gradually grew tired. She curled up on the sofa and fell asleep uneasily. In the middle of the night, she suddenly felt someone pull her arm and drag her up.
She opened her bleary eyes and met a pair of burning tiger eyes. Wei Xi was a little confused from sleep and rubbed her eyes, mumbling, ‘You’re back. The food is in the pot, it might be cold, I’ll go heat it up for you?’
Ruan Shaonan didn’t say anything, panting heavily while impatiently tugging at his tie as if he had drunk a lot again. It was close to midnight, New Year’s Eve had passed, and the noise of the fireworks had gradually faded away. The villa was dark and silent inside and out.
Wei Xi’s heart shrunk into a ball, leaning against the corner of the sofa and holding her breath. She took a close look, as if she were a fish kept in a pond, afraid that the slightest movement would scare people and await the fate of being gutted.
Last time, he was drunk. What about this time? He was angry again, and he drank again. What would he do to her? Is it too late to run away?
Tick-tock, tick-tock, the sound of his watch. It sounded especially alarming in the silent darkness of the night.
‘It’s so dark, isn’t it?’ she said, her throat dry with nervousness, licking her lips. ‘I’ll turn on the lights…’
Clang! The teacup on the table fell to the carpet, spilling the green tea all over the floor. In an instant, the aroma of tea filled the air.
When the man overpowered her, he did so with the ferocity of a hungry tiger. She felt her teeth chatter and her insides clench. In a moment of crisis, she thought of Mrs. Wang. Unfortunately, the maid’s quarters where she lived were too far away to be of any help.
At the moment, she could really scream her lungs out, but no one would hear her.
Wei Xi felt miserable. What had he said this morning? Even if she had overreached herself and made him lose his temper, he shouldn’t have treated her like this.
The man’s teeth were grinding against the tender flesh of her neck. Wei Xi’s heart was pounding, and she closed her eyes in resignation. She didn’t struggle, because struggling would only make it hurt more and be more embarrassing.
But she never expected…
‘You win…’ He suddenly lowered his voice and said hatefully in her ear.
Weixi was suddenly startled, but she didn’t understand the meaning of his words. He said, she won? What did she win over him?
But he didn’t say anything more, and suddenly he fiercely pulled her clothes, just being tyrannical and impatient. ’Forget it, I admit defeat, I admit defeat. Give it to me! Give it to me now! I’ll give you everything I have, even my life!’
Wei Xi was shocked from beginning to end by the man’s crazy words, crazy actions, and crazy eyes. She only heard a muffled growl, as if it came from some kind of predatory beast. Before she could recover, he had already pulled her up…
It hurts!
A sudden, sharp pain shot through her body. She lifted her neck, her soul and spirit shattered as if by the whip of a hellish demon.
Sweat broke out on her forehead, her hair damp at the temples, her eyes vacant. She stared straight up at the high ceiling of the living room, watching the distinctive contours gradually distort. She wondered if this was the legendary Nine Circles of Hell.
Gripping his shoulders with both hands, she breathed heavily, her fingernails almost embedded in his flesh. All the suffering she had endured in the past was now adding up, but it was nothing compared to this tenth. In the blink of an eye, her fingers went numb and she was sweating profusely, but not a single tear fell.
What did he just say? What did he promise her? It was probably something very important, perhaps even more important than her life. But why was he so cruel? It was as if he wanted to tear her apart and reduce her to ashes.
His arms were full of soft, warm flesh, and the man kissed her slightly parted lips with fascination. His large hands were on her waist, and he tossed her body up and down to the rhythm of his own. The person in his arms was hunched over pitifully, her chin resting on his shoulder, like a scaly mermaid, too sore to speak. He suddenly remembered something and stopped abruptly, mumbling, ‘That’s right, I promised you that I wouldn’t bully you, I wouldn’t bully you…’
Wei Xi’s mouth curled up into a bitter smile. It was hard for him to remember even though he was so drunk. He hadn’t bullied her, he had just torn her apart.
The man’s iron body suddenly softened as he put her down on the carpet, kissed her softly while pushing up against her, and muttered, ‘Wei Xi, you’re a good girl, does this make you feel better? Does it?’
How could it not hurt? These small displays of affection, which were better than nothing, were utterly inadequate compared to the almost brutal predation of the moment.
Within a few minutes, Weixi was already in agony, her insides splitting apart, cold sweat dripping from her body, trembling and shivering in fear, unable to stretch out. Not only that, every inch of her skin had become extremely sensitive, and it was tearing her heart out every time she moved.
Through her sweat-soaked eyelashes, Wei Xi looked sadly at the man who was enjoying himself at her expense. He continued to kiss her passionately, saying sweet nothings that warmed her heart and made her feel all warm and fuzzy inside. But every movement he made made her feel like she was being tortured. The two of them were in deep water, but he was having the time of his life.
She couldn’t stand it anymore. Like an irritated kitten, Wei Xi clenched her fists and smashed them randomly onto the man’s shoulders and back, but it was useless. It was just like tickling him. Thinking back to the scene this morning when he was holding her and making his vows, she suddenly felt aggrieved and her eyes welled up with tears.
Her chest was wet, and the man stiffened. He lifted her chin and looked at her tearful face with drunken eyes. He asked rather strangely, ‘I kissed you, but does it still hurt?’
Wei Xi was at a loss for words, unable to laugh or cry. She was in his arms, her mouth slightly open, her breath as if she were about to float away, but she couldn’t say a word.
The man reached out and felt a layer of sweat on her forehead. Even though he was drunk, he was heartbroken and couldn’t take it anymore. So he didn’t have enough fun and hastily called it a night.
Wei Xi was obviously a little shocked. She held onto the clothes he had torn apart, trying to retreat as far as possible, but he quickly put an arm around her. She cowered in his arms, afraid to move for fear of alarming him and not knowing what he would do next.
She had never realised just how strong he was. Her trembling body, already in pain, could not bear any more.
‘Do I owe you from a previous life?’ He kissed her reddened eyes drunkenly, and suddenly smiled sadly, ‘My little Weixi, I will die at your hands sooner or later.’
Chapter 28: You still want to kill me
The next morning, Wang’s wife woke up and walked into the living room to see the two men sleeping on the carpet. She let out a cry of alarm, quickly covering her eyes and chanting, ‘Amitabha, Amitabha…’
The two men had just fallen asleep, but she woke them up. Ruan Shaonan sat up, feeling a splitting headache. He couldn’t quite remember what he had done last night when he was drunk, but he rubbed his temples and scolded, ‘Auntie Wang, what are you shouting about so early in the morning?’
Wei Xi pulled her clothes around her and hid behind him, pushing him a little embarrassedly. Ruan Shaonan opened his eyes and saw that he was completely naked.
He immediately looked for something to cover himself with. ‘Sorry, Sister Wang, we were…’
The old man had already turned his back and was grinning, saying, ‘It’s fine, I didn’t see anything. I’ll be going home soon, so you young people can shut the door and go crazy as much as you like, hehe…’
Before leaving, he didn’t forget to give Wei Xi a glance, as if to say, ‘Good girl, you’ve caught him this time.’
‘What’s wrong with Sister Wang? She’s smiling so strangely,‘ asked Ruan Shaonan as he got dressed.
Wei Xi glanced at him and said indifferently, “Maybe she’s smiling because she thinks you’re not as good-looking as her grandson when you’re naked.”
Ruan Shaonan gritted his teeth with hatred and reached out with his long arm to pull her over.
’Ouch!’ Wei Xi let out a low cry, and she was lying in his arms, with sweat breaking out on her forehead.
Ruan Shaonan helped her to her feet and looked at her nervously, ‘What happened?’
Wei Xi shook her head, ‘It’s nothing…’
‘You’re sweating from the pain and you say it’s nothing?’ Ruan Shaonan took out a tissue and wiped her carefully, then suddenly thought of something, ‘Is it… torn there?’
Wei Xi shook her head, ‘I don’t think so, it’s probably a soft tissue strain, just be careful and you’ll be fine.’
She pushed him away and tried to stand up on her own, but the pain got worse as soon as she moved.
‘No, I’d better take you to the hospital,‘ he said, about to pick her up.
’Hey…’ It was okay when he didn’t move, but the pain got worse when he moved. He was a big man, but he stood there with his arms hanging down, looking a little at a loss for what to do.
Wei Xi endured the pain and said, “It’s really not. Just sit down and be quiet.”
He was still not at ease. ’How do you know? What if it’s a serious injury and we delay treatment? We’d better go and have a look, okay?’
Wei Xi couldn’t help but sigh, ‘Mr. Ruan, I have worked at “Perfect” for three years. I have seen pigs running away even if I have never eaten pork. If there was a laceration, I am afraid that I would have bled to death long ago, how could I have waited until now?’
Ruan Shaonan let out a sigh of relief and bent down to pick her up. ‘Then I will take you upstairs to rest. Don’t move around today, just stay put.’
Wei Xi nodded.
After settling her in the bedroom, Ruan Shaonan asked her, ‘What would you like for breakfast? I’ll go buy it. How about steamed dumplings with crab roe?
He stood up and reached out to draw the heavy curtains closed. In an instant, it was dusk in the bedroom, and all the furniture and objects were covered in a faint, vermilion glow.
He didn’t leave, however, but just sat beside her, his large hands with thin calluses lovingly stroking her face. The slight tickling sensation was a little pleasant, and he didn’t dislike it.
Wei Xi opened her eyes and looked at him helplessly, ‘How am I supposed to sleep when you keep disturbing me like this?’
He lowered his head and kissed her eyes, let out a long sigh, and said, ‘I already sent someone to notify Lu Zixu yesterday that the acquisition of Taihuang will not be stopped. Yi Tian’s merger with Taihuang is the general trend, and Taihuang must change hands.’
Wei Xi trembled slightly, ‘You still want to finish them off.’
‘However, the Luk family can keep the assets that have not been lost. I had the accountants do some calculations, and they found that their assets in China and abroad, including all movable and immovable property, amount to about ten million. This is not a large sum, but I cannot let the Luk family keep it for themselves, as that would be like leaving a problem for me. So I have made a condition: as long as they transfer all the Luk family assets to your name, I will stop pursuing them, and from now on…the past will be forgotten.’
‘What?‘ Wei Xi couldn’t believe her ears, and sat up carefully. “You mean you’re willing to give those two children a way out?”
’Yes, Lu Zixu has agreed. As long as you can take care of the two children’s lives in the future, he is willing to give up the rest of the property. Today the lawyer will draft the details of the transfer document, and tomorrow we will go to the office to sign it. From now on, you have full control over the remaining assets of the Lu family. You decide who to spare, who to take care of, and who to help. He let out a long sigh, ‘This is the best I could come up with, and it may be the best of both worlds.’
Wei Xi reached out and touched his face, ‘Thank you, and thank you on behalf of the two children.’
Ruan Shaonan took her hand, ‘No need. Just because you’re holding all this in your hands, you must have a plan in mind. The Lu family took advantage of your youth and good nature, and couldn’t resist a few soft words, so they kept coming back to you. Now you feel sorry for them because they’re lonely, but when they become successful one day, they may not remember you. I can’t keep an eye on you all the time, so just be careful and don’t be fooled by their empty words, and I’ll be at ease.’
Wei Xi immediately said, ‘Don’t worry, I’m only thinking about the two children. They’re too young for me to just sit back and do nothing. I think…we should send the two children abroad, so that they won’t be influenced here and taken advantage of by people with ulterior motives. And there’s You Xi, I want to send her away too. She can’t move or speak at the moment, and she’s living on a ventilator every day. I hope that the high technology abroad can help her.’
Ruan Shaonan nodded, ‘That’s a good idea.’ Then he sighed, ‘I hope we’re not raising tigers that will one day turn on us.’
Wei Xi rested her face on his shoulder and whispered, ‘I’m sorry. I know how difficult it is for you to make this decision. Don’t worry, when they grow up, I will teach them well and you will never regret today’s decision.’
The man lifted her face and said softly, ‘Don’t even mention this with me. Didn’t I say that as long as you’re happy, I’ll give you whatever you want…’
The last words were lost in a lingering, passionate kiss. Ruan Shaonan put an arm around Wei Xi, but it caused her strained area to pull, and she let out a soft gasp, her eyebrows scrunched together in pain.
The man paused, afraid to do it again, and hugged her lightly, saying with guilt, ‘I’m sorry, I promised not to bully you, but it turned out…’
‘Don’t say anymore. To be honest, I was also at fault. I knew you were angry, but I shouldn’t have provoked you with my words. Shaonan, I don’t know what exactly happened to you after you left here. But I can feel that you have been harbouring anger in your heart, and even when you are facing me, you can’t control it.”
His body trembled slightly, and he whispered, ’Weixi, I never wanted to hurt you…’
She nodded, ‘I understand. From the moment I decided to stay by your side, I knew what I would have to bear for a surname and origin I had no choice in. Shaonan, I just want to tell you that I love you, I have loved you since I was fourteen. I loved you in the past. I care even more about you now. Whether you do it as compensation or whatever, I just hope that you can forget the harm the Lu family has caused you for my sake. I don’t mind becoming the centre of conflict between you, but I worry about you. I worry that you will drift further and further away, that you will be blinded by hatred and forget your kind nature.”
She looked up at him with such a determined gaze, as if she wanted to engrave the following words in his heart, “I am such a woman, unable to live just for you, because life is not easy, and love alone cannot support the full weight of life. But I can die for you, that is beyond doubt.”
Chapter 29 A woman dressed in her best
The next day, when it was time to sign the papers, Ruan Shaonan did not go. He only called Wang Dongyang and a few experienced bodyguards, and instructed them to accompany Wei Xi to the lawyer’s office, protect her safety, and handle related matters. Wei Xi knew that he did not want to meet with the Lu family, in case he changed his mind at the last minute.
The process of transferring the property went smoothly. All that was needed was for both parties to sign a stack of documents, and the lawyers were given full power to handle everything else.
Lu Zixu coughed uncontrollably in his wheelchair. In just a few days, he had become emaciated from illness. It looked as if his end was near.
Wei Xi didn’t really look at him. After the two teams had signed and exchanged pleasantries with the lawyer, they both went downstairs. At the door, they were supposed to go their separate ways, but unexpectedly, Lu Zixu suddenly took Wei Xi’s hand and said with tears in his eyes, ‘Wei Xi, those two children will…’
Before he could finish, Wang Dongyang gave a signal, and a burly bodyguard pushed him away with one arm.
Lu Zixu sat in his wheelchair, gasping for breath, and the little maid took the medicine out of her bag and gave it to him, before he slowly calmed down.
Wei Xi couldn’t bear to watch anymore, and said to Wang Dongyang, ‘Let’s go.’
Later, Ruixi couldn’t bear to watch anymore and said to Wang Dongyang, ‘Let’s go.’ If Ruixi hadn’t heard about what happened that day, he would have said with emotion, ‘So no matter how fierce, vicious, and heinous a person is, when they have lost all their money and are deserted by everyone, that’s all they are.’
Ruixi sighed, ‘It is said that the world is bustling with people seeking profit, and the world is full of people scrambling for it. Only at this moment do I realise that the world is confused. Even if you were once feared in all directions, in the end you are just a lonely grave with a cup of yellow earth.’
Ru Fei sneered, ‘At least he died a good death. The poor people he killed have no one to cry to, even as ghosts. By the way, what are you going to do about the children your animal brothers left behind?’
‘I want to send them to study abroad, somewhere with a better environment that doesn’t reject Chinese people.’
‘Ruan Shaonan agrees?’
“He already gave his approval, and he’s been helping me find a school these past few days.’
Ruxiang nodded approvingly, ‘He’s really quite good. Despite carrying such a deep-seated grudge, he can still treat the descendants of his enemy so kindly. I can understand your way of thinking, but it’s a bit more difficult for him to understand. After all, their positions are different. Besides, no one can guarantee that the two children won’t become a second Ruan Shaonan. He’s now left himself with a hidden danger, big or small. He didn’t completely eliminate the root of the problem, and he did it entirely out of respect for you.’
Wei Xi nodded and sighed, ‘I know, that’s why I must settle the Lu family’s affairs properly and educate the two children well, so that I don’t leave him with any problems. Otherwise, I really wouldn’t be able to face him.’
‘What are your plans for the Lu family’s property?’
“I will keep the old Lu family home. My mother has always liked it there, and she and Lu Zixu have been married for so long, she deserves it. I won’t touch the rest. When the two children grow up, I will give it all to them.’
Ru said, ‘Actually, I want to tell you that you don’t have to leave it all to them. You are also Lu Zixu’s daughter, and you deserve it too. But I know it’s useless to say anything. You hate Lu Zixu so much, you won’t want his wealth, even though he is your father.’
Weixi smiled, ‘It’s good that you understand.’
“The two daughters-in-law of the Lu family also went out with their children?’
Wei Xi sighed, ‘I get angry just thinking about it. Those two women played the drama of family together with Lu Zixu. When they saw that I wouldn’t help and they were afraid of being implicated, they even abandoned the two children and ran away.’
If I hadn’t patted her on the shoulder and said, ‘Try to let go. Human nature is selfish. Haven’t you seen that in Lu Zixu?’
Wei Xi gave a cold laugh when she thought about what had happened back then. ‘Yes, I’ve seen enough. If it comes to being ruthless and heartless, who can compare with him?’
After the seven-day long New Year holiday, on the first day of work, Yitian Group announced to the public that Yitian had successfully acquired Taihuang.
Public opinion was in an uproar, and the excitement was no less than if a major country had a new president. Everyone knew that Taihuang was the leader in the financial world, and everyone in the industry looked up to it. This news meant that the owner had changed from now on.
Ruan Shaonan’s office, villa, and anywhere else he could be found, were swarmed with people offering their congratulations.
He was originally a very private person, so naturally he was overwhelmed. Seeing that the Lu family matter had settled, he simply took Weixi and the two of them flew away together to holiday in ‘the last paradise on earth’.
However, the place they went to was not Tahiti in the South Pacific, but Lijiang, the most famous ancient city in China, located at the junction of Yunnan and Sichuan.
When Ruan Shaonan heard that Wei Xi wanted to go to Lijiang, he looked at her strangely and said, ‘Isn’t that too close? It’s still within the country. What’s so fun about it?’
Wei Xi disagreed, saying as she packed her bags, ‘It’s fun to be within the country. Your own country, your own place, your own people, this is called not letting other people reap the rewards. Why do you have to go abroad and let foreigners make your dollars? Are you rich?’
The man was really at a loss for words, and put his arm around her, saying, ‘You’re not really trying to save money for me, are you? There’s no need. Besides, we’ve already completed all the paperwork, so it would be a shame not to go.’
“Of course not. I heard from some classmates who have been there that it’s a city of romantic encounters. Maybe I’ll meet a handsome guy who’s even more handsome, gentler, and richer than you. Then I’ll dump you and you can cry alone.’
‘You little brat!’ Ruan Shaonan was so angry that he put his arm around her neck. ’No wonder they say you can’t spoil a woman. You’re getting more and more lawless, always trying to bully me with your words.’
They were on the afternoon flight and were stopping at Lijiang Airport tonight. The two of them dragged their luggage into the ancient city, which was already lit up.
The entire ancient city was shrouded in an orange and red sea of lights, with identical Naxi-style buildings, white walls, black tiles, flying eaves and wooden doors. Red paper lanterns hung under the eaves of every household, as if time had turned back, creating an ancient and charming atmosphere.
On the streets, you can see people dressed in bright colours and with carefree expressions everywhere, walking in groups of two or three. There are so many beautiful women that you can’t tell who is who.
Ruan Shaonan can’t help but sigh, ‘No wonder you insisted on coming here, it turns out to be a “city of women”, all dressed up like that.’
They stayed in the ancient city for a few days, strolled around Sifang Street, visited a street bar, released river lanterns, ate black goat hot pot and preserved pork ribs. After they had seen most of the city, they wanted to go to the surrounding scenic spots.
Ruan Shaonan originally wanted to hire a car, but Wei Xi said, ‘It’s too monotonous for just the two of us. We won’t be able to experience the fun of travelling. To enjoy the natural scenery, it’s more interesting to go on a “common people’s journey” with like-minded travellers.’
Ruan Shaonan could not argue with her and had to agree. So they contacted a well-known local driver and decided to follow him.
The driver’s name is Shen Wei, known as the No. 1 driver in Lijiang. He has been driving this route for more than ten years, picking up and dropping off countless guests from the south and the north. He is very experienced and well-liked. Despite his burly frame and fierce expression, he is a doting father figure who treats all the passengers, male and female, equally well. Wei Xi gets along well with him and always likes to pester him, asking him to tell her about the sad stories from his long years as a rickshaw puller.
“Listen to me, everyone. I woke up this morning in a very excited mood. Seeing you all happy, actually in my heart…’
This is the opening line that Boss Shen always says every morning. He speaks in a Fujian accent, is verbose, and always likes to drag out the last syllable of each word, sounding like a little girl. It always reminds people of the dialogue in Stephen Chow’s movies.
Wei Xi sat behind him, covering her mouth with one hand as she giggled. She took out her camera, switched it to video mode, and started filming. Ruan Shaonan, sitting next to her, nudged her and said, ‘What are you doing?’
‘Shh…’ Wei Xi pressed her lips to his and whispered, “Film him. Later, if we invite him to dinner and he dares not come, we’ll put it online and expose him.”
Ruan Shaonan was amused by her and pinched her cheek, scolding, ’You little girl, you’re so naughty, be careful, you’ll get your comeuppance later.’
In the following days, the group visited the magnificent Meili Snow Mountain, the sacred Dongzhulin Temple, trekked up the steep Tiger Leaping Gorge, and visited the beautiful Yupu Village on horseback.
They also took an eight-hour bus ride to the shores of Lugu Lake, known as the ‘last garden of the daughters’. They sailed on the lake, and the boatwoman sang simple folk songs. The lake in front of them was like apple jelly sprinkled with golden sugar, clear and green, fresh and lovely.
Their final stop was Shangri-La, which is known as ‘heaven on earth’.
Standing on the grassland of the Shangri-La plateau, looking at the sky full of colourful clouds, which dyed the mountains and valleys in layers, the distance between man and heaven was so close that it seemed as if their breaths were one.
Shen Lao Da sighed, ‘Unfortunately, you didn’t come at the right time. The grasslands here are at their most beautiful in July and August, with golden canola flowers and purple potato flowers as far as the eye can see. In October, the mountains are covered with wolfbane flowers, red as blood. That kind of scenery is truly rare in the world.’
Hearing him say so, Wei Xi felt remorseful in her heart and said with regret, ‘We should have come at a different time. It’s a pity that we missed the ultimate beauty of the world.’
Ruan Shaonan smiled and said, ‘Silly girl, if you like it, we can come back again. The beautiful scenery is still there, it won’t go anywhere, so there’s no need to feel sorry.’
After returning from Shangri-La, their long holiday was over. Ruan Shaonan booked the return flight, and they were fully loaded with several large bags of souvenirs bought in the ancient city.
‘Pain is so enduring, like a snail moving with patience. Happiness is so fleeting, like the tail of a rabbit sweeping across an autumn meadow…”
Wei Xi vaguely remembered that these were the favourite verses of Ludmila, the Soviet sniper heroine during World War II.
For some reason, she suddenly remembered them while sitting on the plane.
She turned her face and looked at Ruan Shaonan, who was engrossed in his work. He had become a different person. Yesterday, he was like a child, laughing heartlessly, but today, he had returned to the beast of steel and concrete, the predator of money and wealth.
Sometimes, she really admired him. In an instant, he could change so quickly and completely. No wonder he could stand at the top of the urban ‘food chain’.
‘By the way, when does your semester start?’ The man asked her between sips of coffee.
“Early March,’
Ruan Shaonan nodded, ‘The 28th of this month…’
‘It’s your birthday,’ Wei Xi said, ‘I’ll make sure to set aside all my time that day, waiting for your call, Mr. Ruan.’
Ruan Shaonan smiled and touched her face, ‘I haven’t had a proper birthday in years, I’m definitely going to celebrate this one.’
‘What do you want for a present?’
He leaned in and nibbled her earlobe, his voice sultry, ‘You know the answer…’
After getting off the plane, Ruan Shaonan went straight back to the office. Wei Xi returned to the villa, organised the luggage for the two of them, took the present she had bought for Ru Fei, and went to her place without taking any time to rest.
‘I mean, are you sure you didn’t bring back the whole of Lijiang?’ Ru Fei couldn’t help asking, looking at the gifts that looked like a small mountain.
‘Ugh, I wanted to buy a little bit of everything I saw, and before I knew it, I had piled up so much.’ Wei Xi also regretted her extravagant behaviour.
Ruifei began to unwrap the presents, asking, ‘How was it? Was it fun?’
WeiXi reminisced as she lay on the bed, ‘Heaven on earth, it was breathtaking.’ She suddenly remembered something and sat up, saying, ‘I should go, the 28th is his birthday, I need to get him a present.’
Ruifei spat, ‘He doesn’t lack anything, why does he need a present from you?’
“How is that the same? In the past, he would give himself a present, and now I think about it, I feel so sorry for him.’
Ru Fei picked up a green peacock dress and compared it to her reflection in the mirror, asking, ‘Have you thought of what to get him yet?’
Speaking of which, Wei Xi’s face was full of worry. ‘Before our trip, he saw a Vivienne Westwood Saturn lighter in a specialty store. He said he had always wanted to buy it before, but unfortunately the silver one he wanted was out of stock. I just called the store owner, and he said it had arrived, so he told me to go pick it up today. That model is very popular, and he won’t keep it for long.’
Ru Fei said, ‘Why does your husband like everything that’s limited edition? Only 500 of that lighter were made worldwide, and it’s already been bid up to over 20,000 on the internet. I’m afraid the street price is even higher. Can you really afford it?’
‘I made some money fixing the painting the other day, but I’m still short a thousand yuan.’
Ru Fei picked up a turquoise necklace, which matched the dress perfectly. ‘It’s only a thousand yuan, so you can pay for it from somewhere else. He won’t know.’
‘Heaven knows, earth knows, you know, I know. Who says no one knows?‘
Ru Fei gave her some advice, “Why not get him something else? As long as it’s from you, he’ll like it.”
’Of course he’ll like it, but it’s not what he wants most. He always gives me the best things, so of course I want to give him the best too.‘
Ru Fei was impressed. “Auntie, what do you think?”
’Actually, there is a way…‘ Wei Xi paused.
’What way?’
Wei Xi glanced at her and said, ‘I’m not going to tell you. I’m leaving, and those are all yours, so take your time unpacking.’
Ru Fei twirled in front of the mirror in her peacock dress, very satisfied, and made a face at her back, ‘Forget it, you’re a guy who forgets his friends when he sees a pretty girl.’
Chapter 30: The truth comes to light
When Ruan Shaonan came home from work in the evening, he heard the maid say that Wei Xi was in the kitchen learning to cook with Mrs Wang. He couldn’t help but come over to take a look at her. He saw her wearing an apron and mixing a sauce, so he said with a smile, ‘Mrs Wang, you’d better not let her touch your things, or she’ll mix all your precious sauces with the paints.’
Wei Xi was so angry that she turned around and hit him, but he grabbed her and kissed her.
‘Oy, you two lovebirds go out and make trouble, don’t make trouble here.”
So the two “unproductive” people were bombed out by Wang’s wife with a spatula.
Wei Xi complained to him, “It’s all your fault, I can’t become a disciple. I’ll talk about it later. No one will listen to you if I can’t cook.”
Ruan Shaonan smiled and said, “You can’t if you can’t, I have something to show you.” Then he grabbed her arm and pulled her upstairs.
‘Ssshh…’ Wei Xi struggled a little.
Ruan Shaonan looked at her and said, “What’s wrong with your arm?”
Wei Xi pulled back her arm and rubbed it, “It’s nothing, I probably pulled it when carrying things today. It’s not serious, it’ll be fine in a few days.”
Ruan Shaonan pinched her chin and joked, ’It’s made of paper.’
The two of them walked into the study, where Ruan Shaonan handed her a stack of documents. ‘Before we went on our trip, didn’t you look after two children for a boarding school in Canada? The application has been approved. If you sign these documents, you can start the admission procedures.’
‘That fast? I thought it would take a long time.’ Wei Xi took the stack of documents and looked at them. They were all in English. She skimmed through them, and one of them was the school’s consent form for admission, while the others were documents such as the guardian’s criminal record certificate and property certificate required by the Immigration Department.
Ruan Shaonan said, “I asked someone to do it. If I can’t settle them down, you won’t feel at ease, and neither will I. Just send them away as soon as possible.”
She naturally understood his thoughts. This man said that he would forget the past, but I’m afraid that in the end, he will never be at peace. The sooner he gets rid of those two children, the better.
She stood on tiptoe and kissed him, ‘Thank you.’
Ruan Shaonan pulled a chair for her and instructed, ‘Sit down and take your time, don’t worry.’
Weixi’s English was not very good, especially since there were a lot of technical terms in it, so she had a hard time reading it. Without the guidance of a professional, she simply couldn’t understand some of the content.
Just then, Mrs Wang stood in the doorway and told them that dinner was ready. She had even made Wei Xi’s favourite dishes, the mandarin duck with pine nuts and the snowflake rolls.
It was lucky that she hadn’t said anything, because now Wei Xi felt even hungrier. She looked at Ruan Shaonan, who was working intently at the computer, and asked, ‘You’ve read all these documents, haven’t you?’
Ruan Shaonan didn’t have time to pay her any attention, just nodded, ‘Yes, I’ve read them all.’
‘That’s good then,’ she said, picking up a pen and signing her name on each sheet.
Ruan Shaonan shook his head, ‘Silly girl, that’s not how you sign documents. Don’t do that in the future, or you’ll get sold without knowing it.’
Wei Xi stuck out her tongue at him. ‘Then just buy me back, okay?’
The man was at a loss for words. He picked her up and pinched her nose. ‘I don’t know who owed whom in our past lives. Come on, little glutton, let’s go downstairs and eat.’
The next morning, Wei Xi got up very early and prepared breakfast with Mrs. Wang. After eating, Ruan Shaonan hugged her and kissed her before going to work.
After eating breakfast, Wei Xi took out the painting ‘Anger of the Angels’ she had done the other day and planned to take a photo of it with her camera and save it on her computer.
She turned on the computer and imported the photo. She also sorted through the photos they had taken in Lijiang. As she looked at them, she laughed. The two of them were like two kids who never grew up, sticking out their tongues at the camera in a colourful shawl shop.
She selected the best photos and used software to create an electronic photo album with music, planning to show it to Ruan Shaonan when he got back from work.
Who knew that the file was a bit large and the computer even got stuck. She fiddled with it for a while before it returned to normal, and she accidentally opened an email on the desktop. The content was in English. Wei Xi glanced at it without meaning to, but saw that the subject of the letter was: ‘Refusal of admission application statement’.
She was shocked, and after reading the letter carefully, she was certain that it was indeed from the boarding school for children in Canada.
Wei Xi’s mind went blank, and gradually, an indescribable panic filled her whole body. She picked up the phone and called Ruan Shaonan’s mobile, but it turned out to be switched off, which made her even more panicked.
She called Wang Dongyang, who said, ‘Mr. Ruan is in a meeting. Is there anything Miss Lu needs?’
Naturally, you turn off your phone when you’re in a meeting. Wei-xi calmed down a little and said, ‘It’s not important. Please tell Mr. Ruan to call me back after the meeting.’
Wei-xi hung up the phone, read the letter again, and noticed that the rejection letter was dated before the trip. She guessed that perhaps the first application had not been successful, and he had applied again, but just didn’t tell her.
Thinking about it like this, she felt that she was really paranoid, and couldn’t help laughing at herself for being suspicious.
The morning passed in this way. Wei Xi waited all morning for a call from Ruan Shaonan, but he didn’t call. After lunch, for some reason, she felt a little uneasy again. She wanted to call him again, but she was afraid that it would delay his work and make him feel like an ignorant housewife who was suspicious.
She had to bear it.
All afternoon, Wei Xi was always a little restless, her heart going up and down, and her mind going from relaxed to tense. She racked her brains, but just couldn’t figure out what to do. Finally, in the evening, Ruan Shaonan’s secretary called and said that he had a dinner engagement and would not be home for dinner.
Wang’s wife answered the phone. Seeing Wei Xi’s disappointed expression, she consoled her with heartfelt words, ‘Men are like that. They have to attend to important matters. Don’t take it personally.’
Wei Xi slept uneasily that night, having had some strange dreams, mixed together in a jumble. At one moment it was her mother’s desperate and beautiful face, at another it was Lu Zixu’s expression as he looked at her last at the law firm as if she were a life raft, then there were the innocent eyes of her two children, and finally it was fixed on Ruan Shaonan’s thin lips slightly raised in an inscrutable smile.
She woke up several times in the middle of the night, and then sank back into her dreams. It seemed that someone had returned in her dream, but it was just a dream after all. No one came to wake her up, and no one returned to hug her. In the middle of the night, she curled up alone on the cold bed, feeling dizzy and miserable, unaware and insensitive.
Finally, it was the next morning. She woke up alone, the pillow next to her was flat, the quilt was cold, and no one had returned. Wei Xi really couldn’t hold back anymore, so she called him again, but his phone was still turned off. She then called Wang Dongyang’s phone, which was also switched off. She called his secretary, who asked her name and a few minutes later told her that Mr. Ruan had not come to work today.
Wei Xi realised that something was beginning to go wrong…
She opened the door to his study and turned on his computer. She found that apart from a few photos, an electronic photo album she had made and an English letter, there was nothing else in it. He had moved all the files inside, which were used for his usual work. What did this mean?
She simply opened all the drawers and cupboards and turned over the contents in one go. Her heart was pounding, her breathing rapid, and she found herself growing closer and closer to the truth she had been longing to know, and growing more and more frightened.
In her panic, a stack of photos fell out of a drawer and scattered like snowflakes on the carpet. She picked them up one by one, and then, like a pale statue, she was frozen in that moment.
The whole stack of photos were of Ruan Shaonan and another woman. And that woman was Gu Yongling, whom she had met in the hospital. The photos were taken two years ago, and the backgrounds were all over the world: Indonesia, Singapore, Vietnam, Thailand… It turned out that they had already been over for a long time. So why did he come to see her again?
The answer was obvious.
With trembling hands, Wei Xi rummaged through the rest of the things, and if her guess was true, there would definitely be clues left behind.
She found a few more bank deposit receipts, all for clothes and jewellery, expensive items. Looking at the time, they were signed during the period of their cold war.
She slumped to the ground…
The various things before her were like a nightmare from which she could not wake up, and the person in the dream was still ignorant. Tears fell drop by drop on the photos and bills, and she had no idea about any of it.
During this period of time, everything they had said and done, his childlike satisfied smile, his bashful expression, his stammering words, his strong embrace, the passion that almost shattered her…it all appeared before her eyes like a fast-forwarded replay.
What was real? What was fake? Why was it that until today, what she saw was not the whole of him? What did he want by deceiving her like this?
The phone rang for a long time before she came back to her senses and picked it up in a daze.
‘Weixi…’ It was the voice of Ruan Shaonan.
Weixi’s tears suddenly fell, like a floodgate opening and rushing out.
‘I’m sorry, I had a business dinner last night and drank a bit too much, so I fell asleep in the hotel room. I just woke up now, you don’t blame me, do you?’
Weixi held back her choking sobs and said with difficulty, ‘No…’
The person on the other end of the line seemed to let out a heavy sigh of relief, and then said in a brisk voice, ‘Let’s have lunch together at noon. I’ll come pick you up?’
‘Okay…’
After hanging up the phone, she put the photos and bills into a bag and put it in her handbag. Then she went to the bathroom, washed her face, and changed into a different set of clothes.
After everything was ready, Ruan Shaonan’s car also arrived at the villa’s front door.
Wei Xi got into the car with her handbag, and Ruan Shaonan leaned over to kiss her as usual. Wei Xi struggled a little, and he laughed and stepped back.
The two of them didn’t speak the whole way, and Wei Xi felt like a cat in a sack, her heart was itching and she was suffering in every way.
Before she knew it, they arrived at the restaurant where they had eaten for the first time, the Huaiyang restaurant. It was not very busy at noon, and they were in the same private room.
Ruan Shaonan ordered a few small dishes and asked for a pot of jasmine tea to be brewed. The room was filled with the fragrance of tea. The sound of the guzheng was still as distant and lingering as if they were really by the water in Jiangnan. Nothing had changed here.
‘Why is it so quiet today? You’re not really angry, are you?’ Ruan Shaonan pushed his teacup towards her, but when she showed no intention of drinking, he picked up his cup and sipped at the tea.
Wei Xi’s heart was beating so fast, as if she were the one who had lied. She tried her best to calm herself down, then took out the pocket from her bag and placed it on the table, waiting to see his reaction.
Ruan Shaonan was puzzled, so he picked it up and opened it, then laughed, ‘I wondered why you had been frowning the whole way, and now I know why. I can explain…’
Wei Xi’s heart, which had been hanging in the balance, finally settled a little. She was about to speak when the phone rang. It was Ru Fei.
‘Wei Xi, did you watch the noon news?’
Wei Xi was distracted. ‘Ru Fei, I’m talking to Shaonan about something. Can you call back later?’
“The two children from the Lu family were strangled last night and their bodies were dumped in front of the Lu family’s old mansion.’
Wei Xi opened her eyes wide in vain, holding the phone, and looked at the man across from her in horror. The man, however, did not look at her, but drank his tea carelessly, looking casually out the window at the tall magnolia tree.
“The police suspect a kidnapping, but the Lu family had no money to pay the ransom, so the kidnappers killed the children. Your father heard the news and went crazy, jumped from the hospital building, and is dead…’
The phone fell to the ground, but it wasn’t broken. Ru’s voice came from the receiver, resonating in the confined space.
‘Weixi, Weixi, what’s wrong? Are you still there?’
Ruan Shaonan leaned over and picked it up, smiling as he looked at Weixi’s pale face. He spoke slowly into the receiver, ‘She already knows, so you don’t need to call anymore.’
Chapter 31 Do you think you’re worth it?
‘Did you do it?‘
Ruan Shaonan leaned back in his chair, crossing his long fingers as he looked at her with leisurely interest. “Do you want me to say yes or no?”
’I want the truth!”
Ruan Shaonan laughed. ’Of course not. Why would you think that? I remember telling you that the principle of high society is to never get your hands bloody, not even the smell of it. Of course I wouldn’t do such a thing myself. As long as I find the right person and put out a little news through the right channels, someone will naturally take the risk for the money. All I have to do is sit back and watch the show. Why do it myself?”
Wei Xi’s lips trembled. ’Why didn’t the Luk family come looking for me after something so big happened?’
‘Maybe they did, but we were in Lijiang at the time. I was afraid they would harass you, so I set your phone to reject all calls from the Luk family. I don’t think you’ll blame me for that, will you?”
Wei Xi’s vision went dark for a moment, and it took her a while to recover. She spoke with difficulty, “Why? You promised me…”
Ruan Shaonan laughed, his beautiful dark eyes looking at her with amusement, as if he were looking at a joke. ’Who do you think you are?’
‘What?‘
’You really think I would give up my revenge for you? Let the Luk family go and even send Luk Zixu’s descendants to study abroad? Haha…’ He couldn’t stop laughing. “You don’t really think of yourself as Wang Zhaojun, do you? Can’t you tell from beginning to end that I’m using you?”
He looked at the photos on the table and laughed again. ’It seems that you really didn’t see it, and you even took these photos and came to me to accuse me.’ He said, casually picked up a photo, and pointed at the beautiful woman in it, ‘She is my fiancee, we have been engaged for two years. But don’t be sad, you are not a third party, because… I have never loved you.’
She looked at him in disbelief, ‘What did you say?’
He stood up, pushed the stray hair from her cheek, and said, cruelly, word by word, clearly, ‘I said, I have never loved you.’
The repeated blows shook her to the core. She swayed a little and, like a fool, repeated his words, ‘You said…you’ve never loved me?’
“Think carefully. Have I ever said “I love you” to you in all this time? You’re the one who thinks I’m in love with you. Just as expected of a little girl. You take everything a man says seriously. You’re not stupid, just foolish. You’ve forgotten, I’m a businessman, I’m looking for value for money, I’m only interested in valuable goods. I’ve spent so much time and effort on you. What do you think I want?‘
He looked her up and down like an item, and laughed, “Your body? Or your feelings? Do you think you’re worth it? Do you really think I still care about the few jokes we said when we were kids? I’ll find you for one reason.”
’Because… my surname is Lu.’ Trembling, she gave the obvious answer.
‘Ever since you saw me at the Beauty Pageant, it was all a setup. You created the illusion that you were in love with me, so that the Luk family would come after me. And you used me to cheat the Luk family out of all their money. The document I signed that day should have included a property transfer agreement, and I have already transferred all the remaining assets of the Luk family to you. Am I right, Mr. Yuen?’
Ruan Shaonan just smiled, ‘After all, I grew up in the Luk family, so I’m not completely hopeless. In fact, I did warn you that day, “Look carefully, don’t sell yourself short. But you didn’t listen…”’
Yes, he did say that day that she was obsessed. Even if she racked her brains and exhausted every ounce of ingenuity, she could never have imagined that he would deceive and use her in this way.
She was a complete fool, completely played for a fool. Such a vicious plot! Such a devious mind! Such a sinister heart!
She really doubted whether he was the same person as the Ruan Shaonan she had known as a child. He had promised that he would never hurt her. But even that oath was false, so what else about him was true?
Wei Xi’s tears fell drop by drop. She bit her lips tightly, telling herself not to cry, not to cry, what’s the point of crying! But the tears were uncontrollable, not even a single drop.
She wiped away the tears with her fingers and choked as she said, ‘You’ve already won. That money is nothing to you. Even without me, you’d still be the winner. Why…why did you have to use me?’
He lifted her chin and chuckled, ‘Because I’m evil. I like to see people full of hope and then despair. You don’t have to look at me like that. It’s all your father’s fault. Did he tell you about his great achievements?’
Wei Xi couldn’t help but tremble. He laughed coldly, his piercing gaze like a torture instrument. ‘He did, didn’t he? Although you’ve always been careful around me and never say a word, I know that you know everything that happened back then. He partnered with my father in business, not only did he cheat him of all his wealth, he also made him go into debt and persuaded him to borrow from loan sharks. When my father was at his wits’ end, he took over his company on the condition that he help him pay off his debts. In the end, when my father was looking to his best friend for help to tide him over his difficulties, he drove him to jump to his death. Don’t you feel that everything that happened in the Lu family today seems familiar?’
Wei-xi’s eyes suddenly widened. Ruan Shaonan grabbed her arm, his face almost distorted with rage. ‘Yes! I learned from your father. He was a really good teacher, and I was his most qualified student. I learned better and more thoroughly than any of the Luk children. Do you know what I was like when my mother and I saw the smashed corpse in the morgue? I vomited my breakfast all over it. That was my father!’
He looked good, grinding his teeth, as if he were looking through her at his most hated enemy, ‘Lu Zixu. He is old, and it is too easy for me to win him today. But that’s not what I want! I want him to experience all the pain our family went through in the beginning. I want him to watch his loved ones suffer and die one by one in despair. I want him to wait with hope, only to be ruined by his own daughter in the end, and die without peace!’ Wei Xi was in excruciating pain from his grip and said between sobs, ‘Because of this, you deceived me and used me? And the two children, they are still so young. How could you be so horrible and so cold-blooded?’
“Who wouldn’t take advantage of you? What kind of person am I? Lu Zixu has been worldly and savvy for so many years, how could he not be able to tell? But he still pushed you onto me, for money, for my life, for the safety of my descendants. Does he really treat you like a daughter? You Luk family members are really interesting. You also divide your children into different classes, and which one takes care of you? Who doesn’t betray you?”
Wei Xi curled up a little, clenching her lips so tightly that they bled, but her eyes fell even more fiercely.
He grabbed her hair fiercely and sneered, ‘Do you feel sorry for yourself? You’re not pathetic enough. I should really take you to see my mother, so you can see what pathetic really means! What madness really is! But don’t be scared when you see her. She lives in the madhouse in the west of the city. She has to take a bath ten times a day, scrubbing her body with lime. She screams like a ghost every night…’
Wei Xi was almost driven mad by him. This was how a vengeful ghost demanded a life. She struggled blindly, tears streaming down her face, ‘Let go of me! Let go!’
Ruan Shaonan gave a strong shake, and Wei Xi fell back into the chair. She looked blankly at the fine wine and delicious food in front of her, and asked despairingly, ‘So now, I’m the only one in the Lu family who can move. What do you want?’
Ruan Shaonan smiled and said mockingly, ‘What do you think I’m going to do? I don’t love you, but I don’t hate you either. Come to think of it, you’re quite pitiful. I don’t need to deal with someone who is not even liked by the Lu family. To me, you are like that paper cup, which has no value after use. And I’ve never wasted time on things that have no value…’
He looked at his watch and continued, ‘This is the place where we first came, and these are the things I first ordered for you. Let’s part on good terms. If you have time, go back to the villa and pack up your things. I’ve already sold it, and someone will come to collect the house in a few days.”
He walked towards the door, and suddenly remembered something, so he said, ’Oh yes, your sister Lu Youxi died a few days ago. I forgot to tell you. The hospital said that the nurse didn’t insert the oxygen tube properly. What a pity, you’ve even lost your last relative.’
It was getting dark when Wei Xi came out of the box in a daze. She walked straight down the high, narrow wooden stairs. When she went downstairs, she almost missed a step and fell four steps down.
The shop assistant came over immediately and helped her up. She saw that she had bruises on her arms and legs. In particular, her leg had rubbed off a piece of skin, exposing bloody red flesh.
‘Miss, you’re badly hurt. Do you want to go to the hospital?”
Wei Xi pushed everyone away, stumbled to her feet, and walked out like a possessed person, her eyes wide.
The restaurant was built halfway up a mountain, and the people who ate there drove here. It was dark now, and there was not a single person on the mountain road. She was all alone, like a mindless walking corpse, lost along the way.
‘She is my fiancee, and we have been engaged for two years. But don’t feel sad, because you are not the third party, and I have never loved you.
‘Have I ever told you “I love you” once? It is you who think I love you. As expected of a little girl, you take things seriously when a man gives you a little affection.
’I have spent so much time, money and energy on you, what do you think I want? Your body? Or your affection? Do you think you are worth it?’
Weixi covered her ears tightly, her legs gave way, and she fell face-first onto the grass by the roadside. She curled up like a little mouse after a disaster, feeling utterly helpless.
‘It’s okay, it’s definitely going to be okay,’ she told herself over and over again as tears streamed down her face. ‘I’ll be fine when I wake up, and it’ll be fine when it’s light out. No matter how long the night, it’ll pass. As long as I open my eyes, it’ll be a new day. If only Ru Fei wasn’t still waiting for me, we have so much to do, I still have to paint, I can’t fall, I can’t fall…”
Wei Xi struggled to get up, only then did she realise that she had injured her hands and legs. She wanted to call Ru Fei, but realised that she hadn’t taken her phone out when she left the hotel, and it was already late.
A man passing by saw her in such a state and came over to ask, ’Miss, do you need help?’
‘Sir, can I borrow your phone?‘ Wei Xi looked up and saw that the man was wearing sunglasses and a baseball cap, with a mask covering most of his face.
The man took out his phone and asked, “Who are you calling?”
’My friend. I want her to come and pick me up.’ Wei Xi suddenly felt that she had seen this man somewhere before.
The man smiled and said, “Then don’t bother calling, because…” He took off his sunglasses, “You won’t be able to go back.”
Chapter 32: Lend a Knife to Kill
When Lu Renxi called, Ruan Shaonan was sitting in the penthouse office of Yi Tian, sipping a bottle of newly opened Lafite Rothschild 1982.
‘I’m surprised you’d call me,’
the person on the other end of the line said, sounding a little flustered. ‘Ruan Shaonan, don’t give me that. You’re a son of a bitch who crossed the bridge and demolished it. You should know that I’ll get you back sooner or later.’
Ruan Shaonan shook his glass and said nonchalantly, ‘After all, you are a member of a prestigious family, so please be mindful of your manners. Besides, did I promise you anything? What contract did we sign? What agreement did we make? Even if I did cross the bridge and destroy the bridge, it’s better than some people who betray their own father and then whimsically think that betraying their own father will buy them peace and wealth. You must not have studied well as a child. You should know the saying, “When the nest is overturned, no egg remains intact”.
Lu Renxi laughed angrily. ‘I admit that I am not as vicious as you. I have failed this time, but…’ He gritted his teeth, ‘Don’t get too cocky! Ruan Shaonan, your woman is in my hands.’
Ruan Shaonan was surprised, ‘You have captured Wei Xi?’
Lu Renxi sneered, ‘So you’d better be smart, or I’ll chop off her fingers one by one.’
‘What do you want?‘
’20 million, I want cash, you bring it alone tomorrow morning, no tricks!”
There was a moment of silence, and after a while, Ruan Shaonan said with a smile, “20 million? Master Lu, did I hear that wrong? You want me, the enemy of the Lu family, to go to you with 20 million to ransom your own sister?”
Lu Renxi’s breath was a little unsteady, ’What do you mean?’
‘I think I’m just a family matter for you, and as an outsider, I shouldn’t ask too many questions. It’s even more unreasonable for me to give up money for free to ransom your sister. You decide what to do with her.”
Hearing this, Luk Yam-hei sneered, ’Ruan Shaonan, do you really think I’ll believe you after saying that? I’ve been following you for more than a day or two, and I can see clearly what you’ve done to her. I’m telling you, if I don’t see the money… I’ll skin her alive!”
Ruan Shaonan pondered for a moment, and asked, “How do I know you really have her? Let her speak to me.”
From the other end of the line came the dull sound of flesh colliding, followed by a cough and a gasp for breath.
Ruan Shaonan whispered, ’Weixi, is that you?’
‘Yes…’ Wei Xi held the phone, and tears immediately flowed, mixing with the blood and mud on her face.
Ruan Shaonan sighed, “I told you to be careful when you went out. We just cheated the Lu family out of all their money and killed two of their children. How could Lu Renxi let you go?”
Wei Xi’s heart sank, and she asked with a trembling voice, ’What did you say?’
Lu Renxi grabbed the phone and screamed like a ghost, ‘So it was you two heartless dogs!’ He slapped her back and she fell to the ground, her face swelling up on one side. Before she could catch her breath, the man gave her another hard kick, right in the ribs, and she vomited a mouthful of blood. Her insides were in pieces, her heart felt like it had been cut up by a thousand knives, and she was left with nothing but despair.
Ruan Shaonan listened quietly on the other side. Lu Renxi grabbed Wei Xi’s hair and shouted into the phone, ‘I want 40 million now!
Ruan Shaonan said slowly, ’I advise you not to act rashly. My phone is equipped with a signal tracking system and has already automatically alerted the police. If you let her go now and surrender to the police, you can get a lighter sentence.’
‘Son of a bitch!”
The phone immediately disconnected. Ruan Shaonan slowly put it back on the table, picked up his wine glass again, and sipped slowly at the bustling night scene.
Ling Luochuan, who had been sitting across from him, shook his head, put down his wine glass, and sighed, ’She was a nice girl, and you have toyed with her to this extent, which is already very pitiful. Why do you have to add insult to injury? If you say that, I don’t think she will see tomorrow’s sun.’
Ruan Shaonan chuckled, ‘I’m not adding insult to injury, I’m lending a hand. I don’t want to be the second Lu Zixu, so I’ll take the opportunity to get rid of the root of the problem.’
Ling Luochuan just shook his head, ‘After all, they had a good time together, so why don’t you have any compassion? Lu Renxi is now a mad dog with no humanity, and I won’t let her die easily without torturing her enough.’
‘That’s why I called the police. He doesn’t have much time. After all, she’ll die, so I’ve done her justice.‘
’You’re really ruthless, talking about it so casually after hurting someone!”
Ruan Shaonan wasn’t annoyed, and raised his glass to him, as if celebrating their common victory, ’Mutually beneficial. You helped me trick her back, and you came up with the idea. We’re accomplices.’
Ling Luochuan laughed and put his hand on his forehead. ‘Haha, you didn’t say it, and I forgot. Yes, I’m your accomplice.’
He rested his chin in one hand and looked at his best friend across the table, amused. ‘But I’m really surprised that you would do this. For a while, I thought you were really in love with her, and I hoped that you would at least leave her alive.’
‘If I don’t let the whole world think that I love her to death, how will that old fox not be hooked? That was his last asset. When we forced his eldest daughter to hang herself, he refused to use it to save her. If he didn’t want to give his grandson a way out before he died, do you think he would be so generous?”
Ling Luochuan was a little curious. ’How did he know that Lu Weixi would definitely take care of those two children? Wasn’t he afraid that she would swallow the money all by herself?’
‘Because he is as cunning as I am, and he knows his daughter as well as I do. Unfortunately, he doesn’t know me well enough. Character determines destiny. From the moment she begged me to spare Lu Youxi, I knew she would give me a big surprise. And that’s exactly what happened. As soon as the Lu family begged for mercy, she softened and came to beg me.’ Ruan Shaonan laughed mockingly, ’And she was trembling with fear, speaking in a low voice…’
‘She doesn’t know that you’re fuming with anger on the outside, but you’re already beaming with joy on the inside.’ Ling Luochuan put down his wine glass with a smile.
He rested his hands behind his head, looked out at the bustling scenery outside the French windows, and let out a long sigh. “Alas, you’ve got it all figured out… Tell me, what’s she thinking right now?”
Ruan Shaonan let out a light laugh. ’She’s thinking that in her next life… she never wants to meet me again.’
He held up his glass, picked up the photo frame with Weixi’s photo on the table, and threw it into the trash can next to him. The fresh face in the photo was buried in dirty ashes and paper scraps.
Ruan Shaonan looked down on her condescendingly and muttered to himself, ‘It’s God’s will, so don’t blame me. You said that you couldn’t live for me alone, but you were willing to die for me. Then, go ahead and die…’
Chapter 33: Purgatory is not so bad
After that night, no one ever mentioned Lu Weixi again. It seemed that with the dust settling from this ‘elimination battle’, she had also disappeared from the hearts of these two men who ruled the world. Like the dust that accumulates for days in the summer, it was washed away clean after a heavy rain, leaving no trace.
Ruan Shaonan was naturally in a triumphant mood. When Gu Yongling heard that he had finished his business, she flew over from Singapore to celebrate his birthday. He took a few days off and spent time with his fiancée, touring scenic spots in the suburbs. The two of them were inseparable and had already started planning the wedding date.
Ling Luochuan was used to a carefree life. Seeing that the Lu family matter was over and that his own Dynasty had profited greatly from the takeover battle, he simply bought a one-way ticket to Hawaii and planned to give himself a long holiday.
Sitting on the plane to the country, he casually flipped through the newspaper and inadvertently saw a news story. It turned out that Lu Renxi had been arrested and the court had ultimately sentenced him to death, without mentioning anything else.
He remembered the first time he saw Wei Xi in ‘The Perfect Beauty’: she looked like a lotus flower blooming in the early summer in a lotus pond, gently swaying in the evening breeze. The small red birthmark on her forehead was like a totem that hid in his eyes at the first glance.
He turned his face and looked out the window at the cityscape. The high-rises, the magnificent buildings, the tens of millions of people – it was like a miracle conjured up by a magician. Eventually, the land disappeared, and white clouds like a fog appeared before his eyes.
Lu Weixi’s appearance drifted through his mind, like the beautiful feathers of a pigeon falling in the setting sun, like the silent song of a tragic fate that could never be resisted.
But it was just a fleeting thought, like a fallen flower in the spring sunshine, creating beautiful ripples before disappearing without a trace after the spring is over.
He put down the newspaper and gently closed his eyes.
Six months later…
It was the rainy season in August in the city, and the rain was heavy. The dense, diagonal drizzle lasted all day, and it was rare to have a sunny day, when the heat was suffocating.
Ling Luochuan sat in the car and looked at the street scene outside the window. In just half a year, the streets and alleys of this city had changed so much. Demolition and construction were everywhere. The bustling and lively scene had reached such an unbearable state that it made people feel boring.
The car entered the business district and slowed down in the surging traffic. Ling Luochuan looked out of the window nonchalantly.
Suddenly, a slender back in the shade of a tree caught his eye. She was wearing a strapless white dress, and she was slender. It felt very familiar, but it was a little different from his memory. He was puzzled and asked the driver to slow down.
She walked very slowly, looking around hesitantly, as if she was looking for something. Ling Luochuan was a little unsure, so he just told the car to follow. The car behind couldn’t pick up speed, and it was so anxious that it was honking the horn. For a while, the loud honking sound filled the entire street.
She heard the commotion behind her and looked back. Ling Luochuan was now certain: yes, it really was Lu Weixi! She had cut her hair short, so that it now reached only to her shoulders, and she had covered most of her face with a silk scarf, but the small, red birthmark between her eyebrows was still there, and he remembered it.
Ling Luochuan couldn’t help but feel moved, so he told the driver to park the car casually by the roadside and got out on foot.
Wei Xi also stopped, holding a small notebook in her hands and looking anxiously around.
‘Wei Xi…’ he called her name from behind.
The person in front of him looked back doubtfully, and at that moment of looking back, Ling Luochuan was taken by surprise as if he had been struck by lightning. He hadn’t been able to see clearly just now because he was far away, but now that he was closer, he could see.
His hand touched her without his realizing, and he saw that his hand was shaking. ‘What happened?’
Wei Xi’s face had lost its colour, and she took a big step back. She looked at him with eyes that seemed to see a stranger.
Ling Luochuan looked at her in surprise, ‘Don’t you recognise me?’
Wei Xi tilted her head to one side, like a lost child, staring at the rich man in front of her without speaking. After a while, she wrote a line on a small notebook with a pen, then tore off the page and handed it to him.
Ling Luochuan looked down and saw that the paper said: ‘I’m sorry, who are you? Do we know each other?’
He crumpled the paper into a ball, grabbed her shoulders, and asked, ‘What’s wrong with your voice?’
Before Weixi could answer, she heard a sharp, angry rebuke.
‘Ling Luochuan! What are you doing!’
The two of them were startled. If didn’t know from somewhere to rush over, pushed him hard, took over Weixi, and nervously hid her behind him.
Wei Xi seemed very puzzled by Ru Fei’s behaviour, patted her on the shoulder, and Ru Fei turned around.
Then the man saw the scene he least wanted to see: Wei Xi was not using her mouth, but her hands, to speak to Ru Fei. She was using sign language. The girl who once had the voice of a nightingale was really mute.
When Ru Fei spoke to her, she also used sign language. They communicated with sign language, and Ling Luochuan stood there, like watching two aliens, unable to understand a word.
He didn’t know what Ruifei had said to Weixi, but he saw that Weixi nodded as if she understood, then gave Ling Luochuan a small smile before Ruifei dragged her away.
Everything in front of him was so shocking and strange. He wanted to go up and ask for clarification, but Ruifei turned back and warned him viciously in a very low voice, ‘If you follow me again and scare her, I’ll call the police!’
He really didn’t follow them, and it seemed that he had not yet recovered from the shock of just now. He stood alone in the hot sun, watching them leave.
That afternoon, he asked someone to find the file on Lu Renxi’s case from the police station’s archives and found the photos of Weixi when she was rescued. He also found the media reporters who knew about this at the time, and finally learned why the newspapers had not mentioned a word about it.
Later, he also found the hospital’s injury report and the medical records of Lu Renxi.
For the whole afternoon, he guarded these and did not leave the room. He stood up countless times and sat down countless times. He muttered to himself, clenched his fists together and then released them again and again.
The medical records, the injury report, Lu Renxi’s statement, he read them over and over again as if he were torturing his soul. Only the photos were so tragic that even he could not bear to look at them again after seeing them once.
Until the lights came on, he stood in his ‘dynasty’ and looked down at the multitude of people below. His heart was still filled with surging waves of emotion.
Everything that had happened in the past played out like a slow-motion movie, frame by frame, showing the vicissitudes of her life that belonged only to her.
In front of his eyes, there were moments when they were amazed at their first meeting at the ‘Perfect Beauty’; moments when he was pitiful as he reprimanded her at school; moments when she stood next to Ruan Shaonan, smiling happily and quietly; and finally all the shots were fixed on those miserable photos.
He once thought that in this cruel game of unequal power, he was just a pushover, responsible only for watching the fire from the sidelines and fanning the flames. And they each had their own individual destinies. She had come to this point, and no one was to blame, nor could anyone be blamed.
But at this moment, his heart could not calm down. Something had deeply shaken him, condemning him silently.
He suddenly realised that he and Ruan Shaonan had cruelly taken everything from an innocent girl in a way that bordered on rape, and contemptuously ruined her life. He couldn’t imagine how he had let this happen in the first place, letting them push her step by step into this situation.
He couldn’t imagine how such a weak and fragile girl like Wei Xi had managed to escape from Lu Renxi’s clutches back then.
Purgatory was no different than this…
That night, while having dinner with Ruan Shaonan, Ling Luochuan was still thinking about what had happened in the afternoon. He looked listless and distracted the whole evening.
After dinner, they sat in the living room drinking tea.
‘What’s wrong? Did the beautiful women and scenery in Hawaii not treat you well? You’ve been listless all night.’ Ruan Shaonan used his computer to check the European stock market.
‘Nothing…‘ Ling Luochuan picked up the card-knife on the table and played with it casually. He looked at Gu Yongling, who had just come out of the pool, wearing a black bikini that highlighted her slender figure in the moonlight, and casually asked, “When are you planning to get married?”
’In a few days. The recent financial crisis has been very serious, and we’ve both been busy.’ Ruan Shaonan looked up and smiled, ’You playboy, when did you start caring about my marriage? This is really rare.’
Ling Luochuan just smiled, pulled out the Tibetan knife with its simple design, and the sharp blade glistened coldly in the light. He was a man who loved knives, and he couldn’t help but sigh lightly. Then he put it back and suddenly asked, ‘Have you seen Lu Weixi recently?’
Ruan Shaonan shook his head, his expression unruffled. He lifted his teacup and said, ‘I haven’t seen her. Mo Ruifei did come to “Yitian” a few times and was chased away by the security guards.’
“So what did she say?’
‘I haven’t seen her, so I’m not sure.”
Seeing that Ruan Shaonan was indifferent, Ling Luochuan questioned, ’When Lu Renxi was arrested, the news didn’t mention a word about her. You suppressed the media from reporting it, didn’t you? You couldn’t possibly know nothing about her condition at that time, could you?’
Ruan Shaonan smiled, ‘I suppressed the media because I was afraid that someone close to her would say something and affect the image of “Yitian”. I only know that she is not dead. As for the rest, do you think I need to care?’
Ling Luochuan raised his lips and smiled, not saying anything, ‘I asked someone to find the file from that time this afternoon. It is said that at that time, Lu Renxi thought she was dead, and she climbed out of the abandoned glass factory by herself. It’s a miracle that she survived.’
‘Oh?’ Ruan Shaonan raised an eyebrow, “So what did she look like?”
Ling Luochuan thought of the photos he had seen that afternoon, and a chill ran through his chest. Looking into Ruan Shaonan’s eyes, he said, “You don’t want to know.”
Ling Luochuan deliberately played hard to get, but Ruan Shaonan didn’t ask any more questions. He put his teacup aside and changed the subject, ’Why are you suddenly so interested in this?’
Ling Luochuan threw away the knife in his hand and leaned back on the sofa, ‘Nothing, I saw her on the street this afternoon. She’s changed a lot, I hardly recognised her. I was curious, so I looked her up.’
‘I see,’ Ruan Shaonan nodded, ‘What, is this a new goal? That model you met in Hawaii last month was quite good, so soon you’re bored of her?’
Ling Luochuan sat up straight and looked at him intently with a discerning expression. The man in front of her showed no signs of emotion at all. Even after he hinted at her past encounter, he remained expressionless, chatting and laughing with a carefree air, as if the person they were talking about had never had the slightest connection with him.
He could be so ruthless. If he wasn’t too self-controlled and persevering, then he truly didn’t have the slightest feeling for her.
He asked curiously, ‘Do you really not care?’
Ruan Shaonan seemed a little disinterested in the topic, and very gentlemanly made a gesture of invitation, ‘You’re free to do as you like.’
Ling Luochuan stood up, picked up his jacket, and patted his shoulder, ‘Then I won’t be polite. You know, I’ve actually always liked her.’
‘That’s true,’ Ruan Shaonan stared at the stock market trend and said nonchalantly, ‘But you must remember to go easy on her, that girl is weak and can’t take much. Don’t get yourself into trouble, it’ll be hard to clean up.‘
’What’s hard to clean up?’ Gu Yongling came in wearing a towel, and pecked Ruan Shaonan on the cheek like a little bird.
Ruan Shaonan laughed, patted her on the cheek, and pulled her to sit next to him, “It’s still about Ling Luochuan, he wants to change the painting again.”
Gu Yongling looked at Ling Luochuan’s overly pretty face and said teasingly, ’You should let the girl go, I’ve known you for so long and I’ve never seen you get serious. Even if you were given a celestial beauty, I’m afraid you’d treat her like a horse stable breeze after three days and forget her behind your neck.”
Ling Luochuan threw his jacket over his shoulder and said as he walked towards the door, “It’s better than someone who spoils someone for a while and treats them like they’re the only one in the world. Once they’re not favoured anymore, they can’t wait to step on their neck and never let them rise again. Be the woman by his side and fend for yourself…”
Chapter 34: When you’re better, let’s change our way of living
Chi Mo heard a noise in the bathroom when he returned home in the evening and saw Ru Fei, who was about to go to work, facing him. He put down his backpack and asked, ‘Is she still in there?’
Ru Fei sighed, ‘Yes, she’s been locked in there for almost a night.’
“What’s wrong with her today?’
Ru Fei gritted his teeth in anger, ‘What bad luck! I was going out today to buy her some art supplies for the new school year. But then, I saw Ruan Shaonan’s public service announcement on the street. I was afraid she would make a mistake, so I looked for her for a long time, but we still got separated. And then, I ran into Ling Luochuan on the street again. When I found her, he was talking to her.’
Chi Mo looked nervously at the bathroom, ‘Did she recognise him?’
‘She didn’t at the time, but now she’s remembered, and she’s even brought up that person’s business, otherwise why would she be like this.’ She looked at Chi Mo’s face, ‘Why are you injured again? Did it hurt your eye?’
Chi Mo shook his head, ‘It’s just a small injury, it’s fine. Be careful when you go out to work.’
Ru Fei nodded, put on her shoes and left.
Chi Mo hung up his boxing gloves and took off his jacket. It was night, but the tin shack was still so stuffy that it was hard to breathe.
He took off his vest and trousers, wiped the sweat from his body with the cool water in the basin, and then threw himself naked onto the bed, covering nothing but his head, like a tired animal, and fell asleep quickly.
In the haze of sleep, he felt a burst of coolness on his face. When he opened his eyes, it was Weixi holding ice cubes and applying medicine to his wound.
Chi Mo smiled and took her hand, saying, ‘I’ll do it myself.’
Weixi shook her head, took the ice cubes away, and carefully wiped the blood around the wound before picking up a small cotton swab and carefully applying the medicine.
The medicine was strong, and the wound stung as soon as it was applied. Chi Mo couldn’t help but let out a hiss, so Wei Xi slowed down and applied the medicine more gently. She breathed on him as she wiped the medicine on, as if that would ease his pain. Tears fell down her face without her knowing it.
Chi Mo sighed and wiped away the tears with his fingers, which had developed calluses from rubbing. ‘Silly girl, what are you crying for? I’m not doing badly, am I?’
Wei Xi shook his head as he took Chi Mo’s hand and said to him in sign language, ‘Don’t worry about me anymore, I’ve already burdened you too much…’
Chi Mo held the cold hands and stopped her from speaking. He touched the shocking wound on her neck and said with a heartache, ‘You have survived such a difficult time, and it is not incurable. How can I not take care of you? School will start in a few days, so attend your classes well. You don’t need to worry about tuition fees. At the beginning, how many people did you beg before the school agreed to retain your student status? As long as you can complete your studies and as long as your voice can be cured, it will be worthwhile for me to do anything.’
Wei Xi’s tears fell even more fiercely, and she hugged the man’s strong but scarred body, unable to stop sobbing. She could no longer remember how many of the wounds on this body were received for her sake. The thought of this made her heart ache like a knife was twisting it.
She was useless, a failure as a person. It was fine that she had been cheated and played with until she was left with nothing, but she had also caused them to suffer with her.
If it weren’t for the need to pay for her medical treatment, she would not have spent all her savings, and Chi Mo would not have agreed to fight underground boxing for Wei Chengbao, coming home every day with injuries all over his body. He was once such a proud person, but now he has to use his life and dignity to entertain those inhumane spectators.
‘I’m sorry…’ Wei Xi’s hand stopped in mid-air. Apart from this, she didn’t know what else she could say to him with her hands.
However, her unfinished apology made him feel even more distressed. He took her hand and said with pain in his heart, ‘Don’t apologize to me, and don’t apologize to anyone. You are not wrong, from beginning to end, you are not wrong. No matter what kind of harm we have suffered, but loving someone is never wrong, it is never meaningless.’
He kissed her forehead, ‘Wei Xi, believe me, everything will be fine. When you get better, we will find a new way to live.’
Everything will be fine…
If it wasn’t time for work, she would still be thinking about it in her heart. School will start soon, and when she goes back, Weixi will definitely get better. When she and Chi Mo have saved enough money, they will let Weixi get her voice treated, and she will definitely get better. By then, they will definitely have to find a new way to live.
Yes, as long as you are alive, there is hope. As long as there is hope, everything is worth it.
Including what she is going through right now.
When she thinks like this, she is pouring wine for a customer. She is not sitting, but kneeling.
She is not alone, but all the waitresses in the private rooms of the nightclub where she now works.
Kneeling service is a foreign product learned from the East. It is exclusively for the rich, especially men, to enjoy the pleasure of money supremacy and the innate superiority bestowed upon them by gender hegemony.
I just don’t understand why some people’s sense of superiority must be based on trampling on the self-esteem of others?
All the waitresses are women and they all have to wear the same style of tight-fitting cheongsam. When they kneel down, their underwear is inevitably exposed to the lustful, lecherous, or disdainful stares of the men, which is considered an added bonus.
If you don’t have the standard S-shaped body with curvy lines, a slender waist and a pretty neck, then wearing a cheongsam is especially beautiful. The men in the box hardly looked at the lady next to them, and they all stared at the view beneath her skirt.
Except for one person.
Ling Luochuan shook his glass, and the transparent liquid glowed amber-like under the seedy lighting. A pair of beautiful丹凤眼, pensively watching the person kneeling on the ground serving them. He really didn’t expect to run into Mo Ruifei here.
As the saying goes, life is full of coincidences.
He smiled and drained the glass.
Chi Mo was already sound asleep when the phone rang. Without waking him, Wei Xi sat up next to him and went outside to answer it. When she looked down at the phone, it was Ru Fei’s number.
She picked it up and tapped the receiver. When she heard this, Ru Fei knew it was her answering the phone. However, a man’s voice came from the other end.
She listened in silence, and after she put the phone down, her face had gone white.
‘Night Blooming’ is a new nightclub in town, a rising star in the world of vice. It is naturally not comparable to “Peerless Beauty” in terms of scale, extravagance and momentum, but it has its own unique characteristics.
The kneeling service provided by a sea of beautiful women in the luxurious private rooms is nothing new. What is most unique here is that they have recruited some schoolgirls to work part-time here. The owner is also extremely cunning. If anyone checks, he will just say that the young girls came with the guests themselves and have nothing to do with the nightclub. As a result, the girls’ table service has become “compensated dating”, and the nightclub makes a lot of money from drinks but can wash its hands of the whole thing.
These children are even more daring than adults. With their innocent, naïve eyes, they are willing to try anything and care about nothing for the sake of a designer handbag or bottle of perfume. Unfortunately, there are people who like this kind of thing. Relying on a few stinking bucks, they think they can do anything, and put their paws on the tender breasts of young girls who could almost be their daughters.
If she hadn’t come here to work, she would have had no choice but to come here. She went to Yi Tian to find Ruan Shaonan for an explanation, but the culprit was left unharmed. Not only did she injure her leg, she also lost her job as a result.
Needless to say, she had suffered a lot of injustice and losses since she first arrived. After being tempered by reality, people become more and more submissive.
When Wei Xi arrived at ‘Ye Yan’, a black-clad man who looked like a bodyguard was already guarding the door.
‘Are you Miss Lu?‘
Wei Xi nodded.
’Please follow me.”
The man respectfully guided her all the way to the VIP room area, but Wei Xi saw a figure anxiously pacing back and forth at the door. Upon closer inspection, it turned out to be Sister Lili.
She used to be the manager of the “Peerless Beauty” and had previously worked at the “Ruin and Rebuild”. Because she offended a guest, she had to switch to this place to earn a living. She is from the north, and is very straightforward. She is somewhat chivalrous, and gets on well with Ru Fei. The two of them have always looked out for each other here.
When she saw Wei Xi arrive, Sister Lili was first taken aback, then quickly pulled her over: ‘Why have you come when you weren’t at home?’
Wei Xi looked at the man in black, who was standing politely to one side and not urging her. So she took out the small notebook she had brought with her and wrote on the paper: ‘What’s going on inside?’
It was only then that Lili exclaimed, and quickly told Weixi the whole story.
It turned out that Ling Luochuan, seeing that Ruifei was not in the private room, asked a few questions about Weixi’s current situation. Ruifei, who already ‘hated the house along with the crow’ towards him, endured and replied a few words. Who knew that this young master would insist on finding out the bottom of the matter.
She couldn’t hold back for a moment and sneered, ‘What do you want to know? You, Ling Shao, are so capable, you won’t investigate it yourself? You have to expose other people’s scars here. Is it that if one of your sisters was abused, you would also ask her if she felt pleasure?’
When these words were spoken, the entire audience was shocked! You can imagine the extent of the shock.
Ling Luochuan was a spoiled brat who was used to being pampered by everyone. Even though she felt a little apologetic towards Weixi in her heart, she would not let her temper get the better of her. Instead of lashing out immediately, she just sneered, her eyes coldly staring at her, her face full of a half-smile. Seeing this, no one in the room could help but break out in a cold sweat.
The young lady in the room was so nervous that she could not speak. No matter how charming she usually was, she did not dare to come out and smooth things over.
Soon, all the other ladies were driven out, leaving Ru Fei alone in the room. The outcome was uncertain.
When Wei Xi walked to the door of the box, her heart was pounding, as if she were a lamb about to be sent into the jaws of a tiger. The terrifying feeling came over her like a blanket. And when she thought about the relationship between the person inside and that person, she had to make a great effort to restrain the urge to run away.
She was no longer the Lu Weixi of the past, who was simple-minded and could calmly deal with sudden humiliation. Over the past six months, she had been sometimes clear and sometimes confused. She could only remember things intermittently, often losing things, and her mind was becoming more and more stupid. She had lost the self-confidence and calmness she had been proud of, and she was becoming more and more timid.
Weixi stood in the doorway and took a deep breath. She didn’t know what Ling Luochuan wanted to do by calling her out alone.
But it was obvious. It could only be something bad. People like them were masters at playing games. They didn’t have to do the work themselves, they just loved to stand above the rest, watching the lives of the ants like them crumble.
Wei Xi bit her lip, her palms sweating, her heart pounding. But if she wasn’t in there, she would jump even if it meant jumping into hell.
Chapter 35: There’s no escape
At noon, Ruan Shaonan sat alone at the table near the French windows in the restaurant, drinking coffee. It was noon, but there weren’t many people in the restaurant because of the scorching sun and the muggy, sauna-like weather outside.
He glanced down at his watch. This was the first time that Gu Yongling had been late. She was a very punctual person and never treated being late as a right, as some women did.
Perhaps something had happened to her.
Just as he was thinking this, the person arrived. Gu Yongling walked over in a modest yet cool Prada summer dress, swaying with a natural grace. Even in such an elegant western-style restaurant, her presence made it seem even more glamorous.
The waiter next to her immediately pulled out a seat for her. After Gu Yongling sat down, she gave a small smile and said, ‘Sorry, I got held up at work and there was traffic.’
Ruan Shaonan nodded slightly and didn’t say anything else. Gu Yongling also remained silent as the waiter brought the menu.
During the meal, Ruan Shaonan suddenly asked, ‘I heard that the branch you manage has recently encountered financial problems. Do you need my help?’
Gu Yongling smiled elegantly, ‘No, I can handle it myself.’
Ruan Shaonan nodded, his gaze expressing appreciation. He just liked how composed and capable Gu Yongling was, knowing when to advance and when to retreat. Unlike the typical rich girl, she was not arrogant or pretentious, and even though she clearly knew nothing, she liked to think she did.
They say that smart men like dumb women, but that’s just a self-delusion on the part of useless women.
The smarter the man, the more he likes a smart woman. Love is like chess: it can only continue to be fun if the two players are evenly matched.
After dessert, the music in the restaurant seemed even more soothing. The two of them were comfortably seated on the sofa, enjoying the air conditioning, but they were both feeling a little drowsy.
Ruan Shaonan didn’t eat much, and he had been suffering from headaches recently, so he drank a lot of coffee instead. He chatted with Gu Yongling while looking out at the scenery.
The restaurant is opposite the central square. It is 2pm, the time of day when the sun is at its most fierce, and the sight as far as the eye can see is a blinding white. Yet there is someone standing in the hot sun, looking around as if they are waiting for someone. Her pretty medium-length hair and slender figure stand out in the empty square.
Ruan Shaonan’s expression does not change as he drinks his coffee and watches. In a moment, a man walked over. His handsome face was unforgettable. They had met briefly at the hospital, and then seen each other in photos.
Ruan Shaonan watched quietly as she stood in the scorching sun with a lunchbox, like a bird flinging itself into the arms of another man. He watched her reddened face from the sun, and the man affectionately pinching her pointed chin.
Then the two sat intimately on a bench in the shade. She was sweating profusely, but she was still busy. She spread a newspaper on the chair and only then opened the lunchbox, layer by layer. The black was sushi and the red was barbecued chicken wings. The contrast between red and black was lovely.
Ruan Shaonan remembered the taste of those foods. They had been his midnight snacks while working overtime, and she had deliberately learned to cook them for him. Wei Xi always brought them in that lunchbox, and after a quick microwave in the pantry, the smell of the rice, ham, seaweed, and chicken wings filled the whole room.
Now, the woman who once made him supper, picks up a piece of sushi with chopsticks and puts it in the mouth of another man, and then takes out juice from her bag to give him to drink.
The man also puts his arm around her shoulders contentedly, turns his face to speak to her, leaving the onlookers with only a handsome profile.
Blue sky and white clouds, gentle breeze and beautiful sunshine, golden square, white deck chairs, affectionate lovers… It’s a very warm and romantic scene, no wonder it attracts the attention of passers-by.
‘Shounan, it’s almost time. I have another meeting this afternoon,‘ said Gu Yongling, looking at her watch and reminding the man sitting opposite her. Ruan Shounan looked away and said, “I’ll walk you there.”
When they got up, Ruan Shounan realised that he hadn’t really finished eating. He looked back towards the square, and saw that Wei Xi had taken out a white handkerchief and was wiping the sweat from Chi Mo’s face.
’What are your plans for this evening?’ Ruan Shounan asked his fiancée as he got into the car.
‘Nothing much.”
He started the engine and said, “Let’s go to my place then.”
After 5 pm, it was the peak of the evening commute. The heat gradually dissipated, but the hustle and bustle had not yet subsided. People came and went in the twilight, and the city’s dusk was as busy and lonely as ever.
Last year on the Lantern Festival, the flower market was as brightly lit as day. As the moon rose above the willow tree, people made appointments after dusk.
Wei Xi wrote these lines on the back of the paper, and then handed the finished work to an elderly couple.
The couple took it and looked at it. With just a few strokes, the expression of the husband and wife leapt off the page, and they nodded their heads in satisfaction.
The old gentleman looked at the words on the back again. They were neat and tidy, yet powerful, and he couldn’t help but give a thumbs-up and praise, ‘Little girl, you have such beautiful handwriting.’
Wei Xi smiled and wrote in her own notebook, ‘I’m glad you’re satisfied.’
The old man stroked his beard and laughed, ‘Ouyang Xiu’s famous lines are many, but I love this one alone. Do you know the second half?’
Wei Xi pondered for a moment and wrote in her notebook:
This year on the night of the first moon, the moon and the lanterns remain the same. I don’t see last year’s people, my sleeves are full of tears.
After thinking for a while, she wrote again:
Li Qingzhao also wrote a verse, which is similar in sentiment, although different in style: The wind has scattered the dust, the flowers have long since died, the sun sets, I’m tired of combing my hair. Everything is the same as it was, but people have changed. There’s nothing left to do, I want to speak but my tears flow first.
The old man nodded after reading it, ‘These lines by Yi Anju are still the best. Well done, young lady.’
Wei Xi smiled and wrote, ‘I specialise in Western oil painting, so I don’t know much about classical Chinese poetry. I’m just fooling around, so you must be laughing at me.’
The old man couldn’t help but praise, ‘Such a pretty child, with such talent. It’s a pity…’
It was almost time to go. Wei Xi counted her earnings for the day. It was the best she had made in a few days. She put her money away and began to pack up her painting equipment. Just then, a pleasant song came from a distance.
She turned around and saw a girl with a guitar singing. This girl came here every day, comforting tired passers-by with her sweet singing.
Today’s song was more beautiful than usual, attracting the attention of many passers-by leaving work. Occasionally, someone would throw a few coins into the girl’s guitar case.
We are all the same. I vaguely remember someone saying that a place where you are adrift is called a faraway place; a place you cannot return to is called home. And in this city, how many people are living from hand to mouth, displaced and lost, lost in the hustle and bustle of the day and the vanity of the night?
And she is singing softly:
I believe you are still here
You have never left
My love will protect you like an angel
If this is as far as life goes
And there is no me from now on
I will find an angel to love you instead of me
It was a cheesy song, but for some reason, when she heard these words, she couldn’t help but tear up.
It was the moment when the sun sets and the tired birds return to their nests. Standing in the depths of the city’s prosperity, it felt like she was standing in a vast wilderness, and the future had become an endless wilderness.
She faced the twilight glow and gently closed her eyes.
Later, Weixi painted the scene that had appeared in her mind that day into a green oil painting. The sky and earth were barren, the wind was strong, the grass was tough, and the bird with broken wings was flying against the wind… Everything that had once appeared in her mind, like a brave tide, burst out on the canvas with endless dreams and strong vitality.
She named the painting ‘Against the Wind’ and wrote the following sentence next to it:
The future is an endless wilderness, and I am flying with broken wings…
Behind her came the sound of heavy footsteps, pat-pat-pat… Startling countless doves. Wei Xi put away her painting equipment, and turned around suddenly in the golden afterglow and the sound of the flapping of pigeon wings. So, inevitably, she locked eyes with a pair of beautiful eyes.
Many years later, whenever Ling Luochuan thought back to that day, to that fleeting glance in the dusk of the city, to the white doves flying all over the sky under the red sky, and to those beautiful, sad eyes under the golden sunset, he always felt that it was like a dream.
Because such a scene is really too beautiful, not belonging to the hustle and bustle of the world, and can only appear in a dream.
However, everything seems to be destined. Just like life, there are countless intersections, countless choices, and countless people who have tried to break into his world, scrambling to get in. Only she retreated as hard as she could, and only she made him feel grateful.
And this feeling is for a lifetime.
Clang!
Wei Xi took a step back in shock, knocking over the easel and losing her balance. Fortunately, Ling Luochuan was well-trained and quickly grabbed her. She fell into his arms, carried along by inertia.
‘Do you consider this throwing yourself at me?’ The man seemed in a good mood, and even laughed when her arm hit his stomach.
Wei Xi was not in such a good mood as he was, and after struggling a few times in his arms, she could not break free no matter what.
Ling Luochuan looked at her and smiled, ‘You’d better save your strength. If you escape, my days at the Army Academy will have been for nothing.’ He said, grabbed her arm and dragged her towards the car, ‘Let’s go, let’s go eat. You promised me yesterday that the time after this would be mine.’
Wei Xi was stuffed into the passenger seat by him, and before she could sit down properly, Ling Luochuan instructed, ‘Behave yourself, don’t try to escape while I get things ready, or else…’ He hooked her chin with his finger, ‘You know the consequences.’
Wei Xi saw him pick up her easel with one hand, her drawing board and backpack on the ground with the other, and then angrily throw them into the trunk of the car.
‘What do you want to eat?‘ Ling Luochuan asked her enthusiastically from the driver’s seat.
Wei Xi’s eyes widened, like a deer caught by a hunter, her face full of shock and panic. Ling Luochuan looked at her with a half smile, “Have you forgotten about me again, or have you made up your mind to pretend you don’t remember? The trick of playing the poor girl won’t work on me, you know that, I’ve never been one to ”feel pity for fragrant flowers and cherish jade’.
Wei Xi calmed down, took out a small notebook and wrote: ‘I have intermittent memory loss, not permanent memory loss. I remember the things I promised you and I also remember your relationship with him. I don’t know what you want, but you are both respectable people of status, and even the two horses don’t work in the same trough, so please spare each other’s face. What I promised you last night was just a meal, and after I have eaten this meal with you, we will go our separate ways.’
Ling Luochuan crumpled the piece of paper into a ball again and sneered, ‘You’re cursing without using foul language, and you’re acting as if you’ve been wronged. I really kind of miss your quick wit. Why be so indirect and ambiguous? Wouldn’t it be more satisfying for you to just curse us as licentious and shameless, worse than animals? Do you think that by giving me a few pointers like this, you can save yourself? If I were to tell you that…‘ He paused deliberately and looked at her obliquely from the corner of his long eyes, “not only does he not care about ”two horses in the same stall’, he is also very generous and lets me do whatever I want. Would that not be a big blow to you?”
Wei Xi almost gasped, her eyes wide as she stared at him in a daze.
Ling Luochuan looked humiliated, biting his lips, his eyes glistening with tears and his expression dark and forlorn. Even if his heart was hardened, it had now melted into tenderness. He said with some guilt, ‘I’m just joking, don’t mind it. But…you don’t need to keep reminding me of the relationship between the three of us.’
He looked at her, smiling coolly, his tone callously indifferent, ‘If I really wanted it, no one, not even the King of Heaven, could save you.’
A mellow wine, a blooming rose, a dim light, a woman who gently pleases him. Another beautiful but boring night…
Ruan Shaonan rolled over with some indifference, put on his pajamas, sat by the bed and lit a cigarette.
The woman wriggled her beautiful and delicate body, suddenly feeling a little overwhelmed. She propped up her arm and asked tenderly, ‘What’s wrong?’
He casually flicked the ashes off his cigarette and said, ‘You’ve changed your perfume?’
‘Guilty, you don’t like it?’ Gu Yongling was a little puzzled. Lilac and geranium, embellished with sweet peach fragrance, are full of feminine provocation and fatal charm.
Ruan Shaonan laughed lightly and didn’t say anything. He pushed his fiancée’s hand away and said listlessly, ’You go to sleep first, I still have some work to do.’
He poured himself a cup of coffee and didn’t turn on the lights. The man sat in the chair in his study. In front of him was this city that never sleeps, a city of bright lights and fireworks. Even at night, it was still dressed up like a prostitute soliciting customers on the street, unsparingly flaunting its cheap smiles and vulgar bodies to passers-by.
This was the city he lived in, the city he was currently trampling underfoot. The indifferent, red-hot dust, the bustling and decadent concrete jungle. At the moment, he is standing at the highest point in the city, overlooking the lights of thousands of households below. He has always felt that the city is most beautiful from this perspective.
A life admired by the masses, the wealth and glory that outsiders see, and the desire to achieve greatness. He has schemed and planned to get everything, and it really is beautiful. The moment he stands at the top of the world, it almost makes him intoxicated and dizzy.
However, this happiness did not last long. Everything remained beautiful, but gradually became ordinary and commonplace. In the future…it might become even more ordinary and commonplace.
Just like the view in front of him, the decadent neon lights, the tall buildings, the well-dressed world, the background of joy, and those petty, mediocre higher animals.
After seeing it for so long, I can’t help but feel bored. Life seems to have become the sex life of a middle-aged couple: no excitement, no passion, no climax, just the same old routine, which is better than nothing.
When the cigarette is finished, he opens the drawer to look for more, but instead finds a bottle of blue asthma medicine in the corner. He takes the bottle out and holds it up to his nose, inhaling the familiar fragrance that fills his lungs.
He remembered that confused and indulgent night, and the same crescent moon. She was in his arms, her eyebrows slightly furrowed, her sweat slightly cool, her cold fingers pressing against his hot chest, sobbing in the midst of his fierce desire, her expression of pain so helpless.
He remembered her parted lips, her watery eyes, her slender legs, her smooth skin, her fair body.
All night long, he was like a ferocious glutton, insatiable and greedy. She had always been unwell, and he had never done that before. She was Lu Zixu’s daughter, and he felt nothing for her. But he didn’t want to scare her away before his revenge was complete.
But that night he completely lost control. He didn’t remember how many times he had her, only that he had tied her hands and taken her over and over again, possessed and consumed by her, wanting to swallow her whole and hide her away in his heart and lungs, somewhere where she would never see the light of day.
With such malevolent thoughts and terrible passion, he sank into her body like a madman. It wasn’t the world, it was an incomprehensible paradise, a hell of burning fire.
When he came to his senses, her sweat had soaked the sheets…
Why did he do that to her? Why did he lose control like that, almost losing all his composure and reason?
Vaguely, he remembered it was because of a photo. A photo of her being kissed by another man. Actually, it wasn’t her fault. Her mistake was that, even though she was being bullied, she still covered for him.
What did this show?
Ruan Shaonan heard his own heavy breathing, rapid and erratic in the silence of the darkness, in the cool moonlight.
It was a sultry summer night, and opening the window did not feel refreshing. He leaned back in his chair, beads of sweat on his forehead, his temples still throbbing painfully. Half asleep, he vaguely felt gentle hands gently pressing and rubbing the painful pressure points on his body.
It was a very familiar feeling, as if he had gone back in time. In the past, when he was alone in the study with the lamp burning brightly, she would pour a cup of strong tea for him. In the faint light of the lamp, the room was filled with a light, faint fragrance.
Sometimes he works late, and she stays in the study with him. He works here, while she watches a soap opera on the computer over there. Whenever he looks up, he can see her hunched over in the chair, her knees in her arms, a big headset on her head, dozing off like a little chicken. She notices his gaze, tilts her head to smile at him, then forces herself to keep watching.
She was so tired, but she stayed by his side so that he could see her when he looked up.
He chuckled softly in the dark, got up, threw the asthma medicine into the trash, closed the study window, went back to the bathroom, took a shower, and then went to bed.
He slept without a dream…
Chapter 36: A smile that can conquer a city
They say, ‘In July, the fire flows, and in September, the clothes are given.’ After the beginning of autumn, it should be a pleasant weather, but this summer seems to be longer than usual. It is already September, but the coastal city is still sweltering. The aftereffects of the autumn tiger are still here, making people who travel feel like they are steamed in the bathroom with every movement.
Ruan Shaonan had just returned from a business trip and had just switched on his phone when someone called to invite him out. Although he had been on a long flight, he didn’t feel very tired, and the other party had repeatedly expressed their sincere hospitality, so he simply went directly from the airport to the hotel to attend this dinner.
The host, seeing that he had done him this favour, naturally treated him to fine wine and food, and was overjoyed. The people sitting at the table with him were also all important figures in the scene, and there were also a few second- and third-tier small stars, all of them charming and beautiful. After a few rounds of drinks, he couldn’t help feeling a little hot, so he avoided the others and went into the bathroom alone.
While washing his face, two more people came in, both of them red-faced from drinking. Only one of them said, ‘Why haven’t we seen Mr. Ling lately?’
The other laughed and said, ‘Don’t you know? I heard that he recently met a student from the Fine Arts Academy, and the two of them are burning with passion!’
‘A female college student? What does she look like?’
“I don’t know, none of the guys have seen her. He’s kept a tight lid on this one, hiding the girl away and never bringing her out. We all say that he’s probably having sex every night and that’s why he doesn’t want to show her off.‘
’Haha…‘ The two men laughed, their voices harsh.
’But it’s strange. He’s the one who can go through a crowd of women without getting involved, yet he’s fallen head over heels for her and can’t keep his hands off her. Could it be that the girl has three heads and six arms?’
‘What can hold Ling Luochuan is a fox spirit. Haven’t you heard? The most attractive time for a woman is not when she is a pure maiden, nor when she is a beautiful mature woman, but when she is in your hands, changing from a pure maiden to a mature woman. Those who have not experienced the benefits of this will naturally not know…”
With a hint of an ambiguous laugh, Ruan Shaonan took out a piece of paper, dried his hands, and walked out.
At around 8 or 9 o’clock at night, it suddenly started to rain, drizzling, refreshing and penetrating. Wei Xi opened the car window, and the night wind, laden with moisture, blew in her face, carrying a faint fragrance of earth.
She had just eaten a hot and mellow fragrant meat hotpot, and was feeling hot and bothered, but now, being blown by the wind, she felt refreshed all over. Leaning against the car window, she almost dozed off.
‘It’s like trying to get you to go out to dinner with me. It’s like I’m trying to poison you. It’s never a bad idea.’ Ling Luochuan drove while counting down the minutes, ’This mutton hotpot was pretty good, right? You should have eaten more meat. If you keep eating all that nutrition-free stuff, a gust of wind in Beijing will blow you away.’
Wei Xi glanced at the chattering man out of the corner of her eye. Then she told herself for the N+1st time: I’d rather believe in ghosts than trust Ling Luochuan’s big mouth.
At first, they agreed to have just one meal, but after that first meal, there was another. After that one, there was another. And after that one, there was another. Every time, he told her it would be the last time, but after each ‘last time,’ he would come up with all kinds of strange and unusual ways to force her to go out with him.
Eventually, he simply found her weak spot. Without having to waste any more words, he just had to stand in front of the classroom where she was taking a class, and Fei, who was afraid of being looked at askance by her classmates, had no choice but to go with him.
Ling Luochuan is from the north and has a refined taste. He likes spicy Korean food, raw Japanese food and salty Shandong cuisine. He is also a pure meat-eater and cannot have a meal without meat. Most of the dishes he orders are not what Wei Xi is used to eating, but he doesn’t care and doesn’t offer to share. It seems that as long as she sits next to him and eats with him, he doesn’t care whether she eats or not.
Wei Xi really had a hard time, and she couldn’t always stand around with an empty stomach, just watching him eat. Finally, he ‘forced’ her to assimilate completely. After trying it, it was delicious. Especially the ‘local lamb hot pot’ just now, the soup was fresh and tender, not greasy, and it was indeed a top-grade nourishing dish.
‘I’m talking to you, don’t ignore me,’ Ling Luochuan said, pushing her.
She almost stuck her face against the car window. This young master always thought that others could take the same beating as him, and never knew when to stop. She perked up and replied to him directly in sign language, “Go ahead, I’m listening.”
After all, the two of them had been spending some time together, and Ling Luochuan was a very smart person, so he could understand simple sign language now.
Ling Luochuan was very dissatisfied and exclaimed in a rising and falling tone, ‘Little auntie, how many times have I told you, where did you hear that? You are deliberately teasing me for fun, making me so angry that my liver is trembling. You are having a good time, aren’t you?’
Wei Xi couldn’t help but laugh, and quickly turned her face away. After spending more time together, she discovered that whenever he was anxious, he would always say one or two sentences in the soft Beijing dialect, without entering the tone, and with a heavy accent.
When this person is not being fierce, not to mention being handsome and rich, he has a basketful of tricks to coax people, truly a character who can deceive people without paying the consequences.
No wonder there are so many beautiful women, and it’s not unreasonable to see them cling to him like bees to honey all day long.
Ling Luochuan saw Wei Xi turn her head and look out the window. He took it as a sign that she didn’t want to talk to him, and he was very indignant. ‘I knew it, you just don’t like me. You like that guy who hangs around all day looking deep in thought in his boxing gear. Tell me, what’s not as good about me as him? Is it that I’m not as good as him, or that I’m not as talented as him? Do you like the fact that he can fight? I’m not bad either. I have received formal training, so I’m better than him at wild boxing. Don’t believe me? One day, let’s go outside and try. If you really are a martial artist, let’s see who is the best on the field…”
When Wei Xi heard Ling Luochuan suddenly mention Chi Mo, she couldn’t help but feel ashamed and a pang of pain in her heart. The emotions that had just started to clear up were swept away, and she became gloomy.
Ling Luochuan was probably really drunk, but he just wouldn’t let up. ‘Say something, what is it about him that’s better than me?’
Wei Xi rolled her eyes. She found that she had really met a ghost today. They say that it’s easy to meet the king of hell, but difficult to deal with his minions. And this young master was even more difficult to deal with than a ghost.
She took out her notebook and wrote four words angrily, followed by an exclamation mark: ‘He’s more handsome than you!’ She even waved it in his face on purpose.
Ling Luochuan never expected this to be the result. He didn’t want to lose his temper, but he gritted his teeth in anger and angrily spat out two words: ‘superficial!’ and then he stopped talking.
All the way, there was nothing to say…
The car stopped downstairs, surrounded by crowded, towering pigeon cage buildings. Between the narrow buildings was an equally narrow sky. Standing on the street and looking up, you can’t see the stars or the moon, just vulgar signs and ambiguous neon lights.
A few streetwalkers lounged lazily against the doors, flirtatiously surveying passers-by with their sly gazes. A few bold ones even shot a pair of seductive eyes at Ling Luochuan’s face, but they flinched back when they caught his stern gaze. Occasionally, a few wretched-looking men would approach and strike up a conversation, either hitting it off right away or breaking up in discord. Price determined everything.
Ling Luochuan opened the car door for her. ‘Tomorrow is the weekend, remember to make time for me and take you somewhere.’
‘Where?’ Wei Xi asked him in sign language.
‘You’ll know when we get there. Hurry up and get in, you’re all sleepy. Don’t stand in the draft, you’ll catch a cold.’
Wei Xi looked at him and then turned and walked away.
‘Weixi…’ He suddenly called out to her.
Weixi turned back to look at him, but saw him standing with his hands in his pockets, leaning against the car door, between the bleak buildings of the slum. Behind him was the dilapidated street, the drunken neon lights, his beautiful dark eyes shining in the light, smiling at her in the midst of this bleak ruin.
This smile was like the morning sun breaking through the broken walls. Even though many years would pass, it still softened the passage of time and amazed the years.
Xixi’s heart stirred. She had known that he was naturally charming and a person of outstanding talent and beauty, but she had never imagined that he could be so charming that he could make a city fall at his feet with just one smile. She couldn’t help but sigh. This kind of man was born to make women heartbroken and miserable.
But he stood there, seven parts dissatisfied and three parts uneasy, telling her, ‘Remember to think of me more when you’re alone at night. Even though you live under the same roof, it’s not worth always thinking about him. If you think about it more, you’ll discover that, in fact… I’m quite handsome.’
When Weixi entered the house, Chi Mo had not yet returned. If she had not been going to work, she would have seen that Weixi was blushing and would have known that Master Ling had dragged her out to eat something strange again.
Ru Fei quickly took her hand and questioned her carefully about whether the young master had done anything inappropriate. Naturally, Weixi told the truth, and Ru Fei was slightly relieved to know that the man had not transgressed or acted inappropriately. But she was still worried, and she blamed herself for offending him with her quick temper, which he had used as an excuse to harass her endlessly.
Wei Xi had to comfort her, saying that it was just an excuse. If he really had made up his mind, it would have been the same whether or not it had happened.
While they were talking, most of the time had passed, and Ru Fei had gone out to work. Wei Xi had spent the whole day teaching, and then spent the whole night with a trouble-maker, so she was really a little tired.
She opened the window. If she didn’t hang the curtains, she could see the bedroom across the street clearly just by standing here. Wei Xi knew that a prostitute lived across the street, bringing different men home every day. When she was doing business, she never drew the curtains. But when she was home alone, she drew the curtains shut.
Why?
To vent? To accuse? Or was it just an exhibitionist streak?
There was no way to explain it…
Most people living in places like this lead a miserable life, and not every action has a reason behind it.
Wei Xi had just finished taking a shower in the bathroom, changed into her pajamas and was about to rest when her phone rang. She had changed her phone number, and apart from Chi Mo and Ru Fei, only one other person knew it.
When she picked up the phone, it was really Ling Luochuan calling.
He had called her in the middle of the night before, saying something nonsense, and she hadn’t cared. On one occasion, she wasn’t sure if he did it on purpose or if he was drunk, but after just a few incoherent sentences, she heard a woman’s voice, angry and affectionate, on the other end of the line. It turned out that the young master was in the thick of a love affair, and in the middle of tender loving care, he started chatting with her about trivial matters.
Wei Xi was at a loss for words, and before she could recover, the conversation on the other end of the line was cut off with a click before it was finished.
Now, it’s so late, what is it?
She was puzzled, and picked up the phone. This time, there was no sound of a beautiful woman complaining; it was quiet, and she could only hear the sound of the wind.
Wei Xi was a little strange, so she tapped the phone, and heard someone say, ‘Wei Xi, long time no see.’
This voice made her feel like a bird pierced by a barb, nailed to a tree trunk, bleeding to death.
The whole world went dark in an instant, and all sounds became distant. There was no longer any sky or clouds, no mist or rainbows, just a vast pitch-black scorched earth.
The person on the other end of the line saw that she wasn’t responding, so they continued, ‘I heard from Luo Chuan that you can’t speak because Lu Renxi cut your vocal cords. That’s okay, if you can’t speak, just listen. We just split up, and he left his phone with me. I heard you two have been getting along well lately. When you have some time, maybe we can get together. My number hasn’t changed, you should still remember it. That’s all for today, let’s talk properly some other time. And…’ He paused for a moment, “I miss you.”
The call disconnected, and all that could be heard was the busy signal. She sat there in a daze for a long time, and then suddenly threw the phone away, as if it were a ticking time bomb that could bite.
As if she had seen a ghost, she curled up in the corner of the bed, clutching the quilt, trembling uncontrollably in the darkness of the room. It was as if she had not answered the phone, but a summons from the underworld.
She was in a daze, mumbling, but not knowing what she was saying. All the peace, all the joy, all the senses, as if they had been wiped clean in an instant by a brutal hand.
Suddenly, she hugged her head and, like a possessed person, banged it against the cold wall.
Forget it, just let her forget it. She doesn’t want to think about it anymore, every word he said to her, every expression, every laugh…
She really doesn’t understand. She has worked so hard for so long, almost exhausting all her strength, and after so much suffering, she has finally managed to put together a seemingly complete self again. And that person only had to say a few words, just those few words, to reduce her to her former self. The man she once loved more than life itself had used a tone of near contempt to easily rob her of everything.
She was in excruciating pain, like a cranky paranoid, like a complete lunatic, and used a method bordering on self-harm to slam her head against the wall, trying to expel from her memory the sight of that person, those terrifying voices, the bloodshed, and everything she could not bear to think about.
But she couldn’t. She had once hit herself until her head was bleeding and her body was covered in bruises, but she just couldn’t forget.
After an unknown period of time, she went to the window like a possessed person, half of her body sticking out. This was the 18th floor, and below her were the narrow streets and decaying neon lights, like a grotesque hell. Someone below was waving at her, calling out to her in a pale, long-drawn-out voice:
“Come on, come on…’
She placed her hand on the dusty window frame, stepped onto the narrow windowsill, and felt the night wind blow against her face, carrying the freshness after the rain. The street market below looked like it had also been washed by the rain, just as she liked it, a world of bright lights, clean and spotless.
It was really easy to take a leap. One step forward, and it would be freedom. The hard part was how to go on living.
She smiled, closed her eyes, and plunged headlong…
Chapter 37 I feel sick just thinking about it
Before eight o’clock, Ling Luochuan drove the car to that pigeon cage street and waited for Wei Xi to come down. But no matter how long he waited, he didn’t see her.
Just as he was about to go up to find her, he saw Wei Xi wearing pajamas, carrying a garbage bag in her hand, wearing slippers, and her hair was messy as she walked down the stairs.
He just assumed that she had overslept, so he strode over to her and complained, ‘I said, young lady, what time is it, and why haven’t you changed?’
Wei Xi turned her face away, with a bruise on her left forehead, looking at him with a puzzled expression.
Ling Luochuan’s heart sank. This wasn’t the first time. Whenever she got involved with anything related to Ruan Shaonan, she would experience intermittent selective memory loss. The duration of the memory loss varied, from just a few hours to several days, and sometimes even a week. During this period, she would not recognise anyone except Mo Rufei and Chi Mo. Everything else, like other people and events, would be automatically erased from her mind like an eraser.
He hurriedly pulled her back, looked at her forehead first, and was relieved to see that she wasn’t seriously injured. He then reached out and waved her in front of his face, nervously saying, ‘Weixi, don’t scare me. Didn’t you feel fine last night? How did you just fall into such a state after sleeping?’
She pulled back her hand and said something in sign language, but it was too long for Ling Luochuan to understand.
Weixi looked down and looked for her notebook, only to realize that she had actually gone out in her pajamas and didn’t have a single pocket on her.
Ling Luochuan frowned at her and said, ‘Is there no one at home? Where are your keys?’
Wei Xi then remembered that if it wasn’t because Chi Mo seemed to have said something to her yesterday, she couldn’t remember a single thing. At the moment, there was no one at home, and apart from the garbage bag in her hand, she hadn’t brought anything else.
Ling Luochuan saw her anxious and embarrassed appearance and couldn’t help but sigh. He asked, ‘So do you remember me?’
Wei Xi looked at him and nodded.
Ling Luochuan let out a sigh of relief. This was much easier.
He pulled her into his car and first took her to a boutique. He told her to wait in the car while he got out to buy her a random dress and asked the salesperson to match it with some shoes. Then they went to a shopping mall, where he bought her new underwear and toiletries. After considering that she didn’t seem to be missing anything, he took her back to his place and let her tidy up.
Ling Luochuan likes to be in the thick of things and doesn’t like living in the suburbs, so he bought a house in a villa district in the city, in a quiet location despite being in the middle of the action. Although it’s not in the countryside, it’s very green. There are weeping willows, cobbled paths and an artificial lake. Each villa is a two-storey building in a faux European pastoral style, with a small garden in front and an artificial island at the back. So it’s not a big area, but it’s sold at a sky-high price.
He is used to living alone. He usually only hires a part-time maid to clean regularly, eats meals outside, and mostly hangs out with people outside. Therefore, in the two-storey villa, the only permanent residents are the magnificent Italian furniture, which is clean and tidy, but without the slightest trace of the mundane.
After the two of them entered the house, he pushed Weixi into the bathroom on the second floor and then threw the things he bought for her in there.
‘I don’t know your size, so I got the smallest size. Try it on, if it doesn’t fit, I’ll take it back. The bath products in there are all unopened. I don’t know what brand of skincare products you usually use, so I just bought one kind. Hurry up and wash up, I’ll order take-out now, and we’ll finish eating later, we have something important to do.’
He closed the bathroom door and started to make a phone call.
Standing in the bathroom, Wei Xi stared blankly at the pile of bags in her arms for a while, feeling only emptiness in her head. All her memories stopped abruptly at the moment when Ling Luochuan walked her home last night.
Later, she seemed to have received a phone call. Who was it from?
She turned around and looked at herself in the mirror. There was a bruise on her forehead. She touched it with her hand and it hurt.
It felt like she had been burned by a fire, and she immediately withdrew her hand. She stood in the bathroom, dazed, with a pile of things in her arms. The bathroom was dark, and her face looked pale in the mirror, like a ghost.
‘Is it because you don’t know how to use the water heater? Do you want me to get it ready for you first, and then you can wash?’ The man outside didn’t hear any water for a long time, so he just thought she was having trouble with something inside.
Wei Xi came back to her senses, knocked twice on the glass wall, and then turned on the faucet of the bathtub. When Ling Luochuan heard the sound of water, he couldn’t bear to stay there any longer and went downstairs.
Wei Xi took off her pajamas and took a hot shower. When she dried herself and got dressed, she noticed that her underwear was two sizes too small. The skirt fit perfectly, but the back was cut too low, so it was practically a backless dress. She couldn’t wear her underwear, but fortunately the skirt had built-in padding, so she didn’t have to go braless. The shoes fit perfectly, except… Wei Xi measured the heel with her hand. My goodness, it was 12 cm high. Wearing them, she really looked like a willow in the wind, swaying and graceful.
Finally, she found a silk scarf in her bag. Wei Xi paused, touched the hideous scar on her neck, and couldn’t help feeling a little sad.
Just like the history of a country, someone will always remember the history of a person.
When she had finished packing and was coming down the stairs, the takeaway arrived. Ling Luochuan was sitting on the sofa, looking up. He gave a rather inappropriate whistle, looked her up and down with his beautiful, slanted eyes, and shook his head repeatedly.
“In the future, I’d better not buy you clothes, because it makes me not want to take you out.’
Then he stumbled over to her, pulled her over to the dining table, and pointed at the food on the table, saying, ‘Hurry up and eat, we’re already late.’
Wei Xi was so overwhelmed by his urging that she sat down in a chair and asked the person across from her in sign language, ‘Where are we going?’
The man was so busy that he looked at her while eating and talking at the same time. ‘You’ll know when we get there, don’t worry, I won’t sell you.’
Wei Xi sat in the hospital office, drinking tea and enjoying the air conditioning. Ling Luochuan was holding her medical records and discussing her condition with several experts. Neurologists, plastic surgeons, brain specialists, psychologists, the cream of the crop, all gathered together.
They discussed the matter heatedly throughout the afternoon. Finally, when the sun was about to set, a preliminary treatment plan was determined.
Ling Luochuan shook hands with each of the experts, then pulled up the person sitting on the sofa and walked towards the door.
On the way back, he said while driving, ‘The doctor said that your voice box is only partially damaged, and if the surgery is done well, you won’t be able to fully recover your previous voice, but you will be able to speak normally.’
Wei Xi turned her face and just looked out the window.
‘What’s wrong now? Aren’t you happy that you can speak?’
Wei Xi looked at him and wrote in the notebook he gave her, ‘I don’t have the money for the surgery.’
Ling Luochuan said, ‘I will be responsible for all the costs. You don’t need to worry about it. Just get better and cooperate with the treatment.’
‘This is a lot of money. I have no reason to take your money without doing anything in return.’
Ling Luochuan patted the steering wheel and said somewhat irritably, ‘Just consider it…my compensation to you. After all, I am also responsible for you getting into this situation.’
Wei Xi looked at him and wrote, ‘Is this considered an apology?’
Ling Luochuan frowned, shook his head and sneered, ‘I never apologise to anyone, and I don’t think I’m in the wrong. We laid the trap, but you walked the path yourself. Who are you blaming? If you think I’ve been atoning for my sins this whole time, then you’re laughably naive. I’m a person who will repay a favour if I’ve received one, let alone atone for my sins. I’m not pitying you either, there are far more pitiful people in the world than you, and I’m not running a charity. I want to cure you because we have known each other for a while, and I can’t bear to see you like this. Don’t think too much.”
As soon as the words came out, Ling Luochuan regretted them. She cursed herself for being used to being domineering and for speaking nonsense without thinking. She was also a person who liked to be the best at everything, and she couldn’t help feeling bad when she heard that.
Who knew that the little woman beside her just gave a cool smile and wrote methodically on the paper, ’Can’t bear to see it? You two put up with it when the stunningly beautiful black and white of the two of you played the perfect double act; you put up with it when you were all righteous and lying at school; you put up with it when the two Lu children were abandoned on the street; you put up with it when he used others to get rid of me; you put up with it when one of you jumped on my back and the other one stood by and did nothing; you put up with it when the two of you, a perfect team, raised your glasses to celebrate when someone else was dying. Now you can’t stand it? Ling Shao, don’t you think it’s a bit late? You can say you’re right, the winner takes all. As long as you don’t lose, you can keep being arrogant and indifferent. But you’re men, powerful figures, but you want a woman to be your fall guy, stepping on her flesh and blood and standing high above her. Can you sleep well?’
Wei Xi saw her hands shaking. She tried hard to restrain herself and continued writing: ‘I understand, you are businessmen, you won’t give someone a favour for no reason. He was attracted to my status at first, and you, on the other hand, want to find comfort in me, a disabled woman. Ling Luochuan, don’t think that you can buy back your lost conscience by spending a few dollars. What is more contemptible than sympathy is false sympathy. If Ruan Shaonan is a true villain who is good at disguising himself, then you are even more like a sanctimonious hypocrite. Just thinking about the two of you makes me feel sick…”
Ling Luochuan parked the car on the median strip of the highway and read it word by word, each sentence lashing out at him, each word resounding. She hated the words so much that she wanted to turn them into knives and cut him to pieces.
After reading it, he crumpled the paper full of words, tore it up, threw it out the window like snowflakes, and then on the highway, under the scorching sun, said to the woman next to him, who was wearing twelve-centimeter high heels and made him hate to strangle her immediately, and was so weak that he could not just do it, ‘Get out of the car!’
Chapter 38: Murder without bloodshed
This is a private villa, nestled in the mountains and by the sea, in a quiet environment. It has been transformed by the owner into a small club that only entertains members and is never open to the public. Most of the people who can come here are well-known, wealthy or powerful figures. Since it is a private club, naturally there are many indecent activities inside that cannot be described to outsiders.
Ling Luochuan had long heard that the pleasures here were different from those elsewhere, but this was the first time he had come for entertainment. There were two reasons for this. First, he did not like to follow the crowd and seek out the unusual. What others said was good was boring to him. Second, although he was certainly charming, he was not indecent.
But today, he was really bored.
At the moment, he was sitting on the sofa, bored out of his mind, shaking the red wine in his glass against the light, and looking at the row of uninhibited men and women on the dance floor with indifference and impatience.
The host, seeing that the protagonist was unhappy, gave him a wink. Several beautiful women, who were usually well-behaved and smart, were now huddled together like ostriches, and none of them dared to go up to him.
Everyone in the circle knew Ling Luochuan’s temperament. He was the most moody, mean and unforgiving character. Accompanying the king is like accompanying a tiger. When he is happy, it’s fine, but when he is not happy, you will not only be embarrassed, you will not even know how you will die.
He put down his wine glass and closed his eyes to rest. The sound of birds chirping in his ears, melodious and rhythmic, the sound of waves and lustful words, pretentious and contrived. It was all the usual wantonness that he was used to hearing, but now it was ringing in his ears, and he felt only tastelessness in his mouth and boredom in his heart.
Psychedelic music was playing in my ears, like the moans during lovemaking, arousing sexual desire. When I opened my eyes, I saw a room full of men and women, no matter who was the man and who was the woman, they had long since become a mess.
‘Even horses don’t share the same trough, you are all decent people, please spare some face for each other.’
Suddenly, I remembered these words written by Wei Xi on a piece of paper. Looking at the various people in front of him, Ling Luochuan felt increasingly ironic and ridiculous.
This is an era where it is easier to spread one’s legs than to open one’s arms. Men treat women like objects when they have money, and women simply treat themselves like commodities. Pornographic photos are everywhere, and lustful men and women breed everywhere.
Who played with whom, who teased whom, who sold whom, and who bought whom. Who can say for sure? When you tease a cat, the cat teases you back. You’re not a cat, so how do you know it’s not happier than you?
Ling Luochuan was already depressed, and when he thought about this, he felt even more helpless. A pair of small hands, as delicate as if they had no bones in them, came to him at this inopportune moment. The fire in his heart suddenly flared up, and he looked at them askance as well. However, he saw a pair of dark, lacquered eyes that looked familiar, as if he had seen them somewhere before.
The girl was barely in her early twenties, with willowy eyebrows and almond-shaped eyes, fair and delicate. She was half-crazed, crying and laughing, after being given some unknown drug, and threw herself into his arms.
Ling Luochuan looked down at her and suddenly realised that her eyebrows and eyes looked so similar to someone else’s, and his heart surged. He was already seven-eighths drunk, and now it had become ten-eighths.
He pressed her against the sofa and kept on talking, ‘I just said a few things off the cuff and you wrote a whole load of things to pressure me into submission. Even if I have wronged you in the past, haven’t I made up for it over the past few days? I’ve been worrying about you all day long, and you’re just fine with it, guarding me like I’m a thief. Don’t you think if I really wanted to force things, I wouldn’t have waited until today?’
The poor girl was confused by his kisses and overwhelmed by his questions, but she had no idea where the trouble was coming from. Her little head was spinning with fear as she hid from him, thinking he was the reincarnation of the devil.
She was filled with fear, but also with courage, and she just wouldn’t give in. Little did she know that this angered Master Ling, and he let his hatred show as he grabbed her chin and said, ‘I know, you just don’t like me. What’s so good about that black fighter? Not only do they live under the same roof, they go out in pairs and are affectionate with each other. I’ve hinted to you many times, so pretend you don’t know. You deliberately get in my way and make me unable to sleep peacefully, don’t you? I’ll tell you, I can ruin him with just one word! Sooner or later, I’ll get rid of him first, then find a rope to strangle you with, and we’ll all be done for!’
He said this and bit hard on the girl’s mouth. The girl actually started to cry, her mouth making a sound, which was pitiful to see.
This crying, however, was like pouring oil on the fire. The man pinched her chin and said fiercely, ‘Don’t cry! You know how to pretend to be pitiful with me. Where is your pitifulness? If there is even the slightest chance, you would hate not to kill us immediately. You think I don’t know!’
The girl was so intimidated by his threats that she didn’t dare to speak, and she shivered violently under him, too afraid to cry out loud.
Ling Luochuan felt really sorry for her when he saw how scared she was, and his anger disappeared without a trace. So, with love and compassion, he kissed the little teardrops, and with patience, coaxed her in a soft voice, ‘Don’t cry, don’t cry. If you cry, it will hurt here…’ He pointed to his heart and took the girl’s hand and placed it on it, ‘Don’t believe me? Feel for yourself.’
The girl stopped crying and just looked at him in a daze.
Ling Luochuan looked at those watery eyes, the small heart-shaped face, and the furrowed eyebrows…exactly like the person.
So, hugging the ‘scapegoat’ in his arms, he murmured softly, and the low tone of his voice, in this lewd and chaotic atmosphere, had an indescribable sadness.
He said, ‘I am not God, not even a god. Even if I were, there is nothing I can do to change what has already happened. But, Weixi, do you know what? If I could turn back time, I would give my life to make it right…’
When Ling Luochuan woke up, it was close to midnight. Looking at the naked person beneath him, he pulled a piece of clothing over him and covered him casually. The girl moaned and rolled over to go back to sleep.
While he was getting dressed, he looked around. On the carpet, on the sofa, on the table, and on the dance floor, there were some naked men and women hugging each other lying around in all directions. Usually these well-dressed people, under the dim lighting, were just a bunch of rotten white flesh.
After dressing, he took out his wallet, emptied the cash from the compartment and threw it next to the girl before walking out.
Once outside, he found his car, leaned against the door and lit a cigarette, taking long draws.
Summer days are long and nights are short. It was still dark in the east, but the morning sun was already peeking through, like scales of fish, the morning clouds were tinged with red, like a tragic wound ripped in the pitch-black sky.
He just kept watching until the cigarette was finished. He calmed down, turned around, took out the key, and was about to open the car door…
‘Your hands are shaking so badly, can you still drive?’ A person walked out of the shadows.
Ling Luochuan turned around and saw that it was Ruan Shaonan. He couldn’t help but be a little surprised, ‘When did you come?’
‘A little while before you. I’ve been in the studio apartment on the second floor. Let’s go together.”
Ruan Shaonan drove, and Ling Luochuan sat in the passenger seat, idly fiddling with his watch.
Ruan Shaonan looked at him and laughed, ’Have you been bored lately? That girl is better looking, but if she even comes to this kind of gathering, she’s just a high-class prostitute. You don’t need to be so serious. If people didn’t know any better, they’d think you were going to eat her.’
Ling Luochuan yawned and slowly replied, ‘It is boring. Aren’t you the same? What, your charming fiancée at home can’t satisfy you? It’s not your style to come here for entertainment.’
Ruan Shaonan laughed lightly, ‘I haven’t offended you, have I? You’re both men, so you should understand without me saying anything.’
Ling Luochuan also felt that he had behaved in an inappropriate manner. For some reason, whenever he met Ruan Shaonan these days, he felt uncomfortable. But exactly where he felt uncomfortable was hard to explain in a few words.
Ruan Shaonan was a person who was good at reading people’s expressions and judging their moods. He was more deeply thoughtful than Ling Luochuan, and naturally knew in his heart why he felt uncomfortable.
Ruan Shaonan has a principle: never make an enemy of someone who is stronger than you, but choose to cooperate with them and gradually make them work for you.
This is precisely his cleverness.
Is Ling Luochuan stronger than him? For the time being, there is no sign of it. But it is undeniable that this young master with quite a background, with an attitude of playing the world, has gained a status that can almost match his without relying on family influence. This cannot but make the always cautious Ruan Shaonan wary of him.
‘Luo Chuan, I don’t have any siblings or relatives. We’ve known each other for so long, and I’ve always treated you like a younger brother. If you have any grievances against me, just say so. If it’s my fault, I’ll apologise. And it will prevent outsiders from taking advantage of the situation and driving a wedge between us after all these years.”
After Ruan Shaonan said this, Ling Luochuan had nothing to say. After all, what could he blame him for? He had watched the Lu family’s affairs and the entire plan from beginning to end, including the final blow dealt to her.
As Weixi had said, so many bloody incidents had happened before his eyes, and he was fully aware of them. He had tolerated the invisible tricks of murder, the cold-blooded and ruthless methods, and the consequences of rivers of bloodshed. How could he be so ridiculous as to be ‘unable to bear it’ at this moment?
He also thought about the many years of brotherly friendship he had shared with Ruan Shaonan, and the fact that they were now business partners, with all the intricate entanglements of interests. He was a smart man and of course understood the other meaning behind Ruan Shaonan’s words. He was also an outstanding businessman, and businessmen know how to weigh the pros and cons.
After all is said and done, he is ultimately a pragmatist who puts interests first, and would never offend such a formidable figure for the sake of a woman whose true nature is still unknown. It is unnecessary and not worth it.
After some thought, Ruan Shaonan, being such a clever person, must have guessed something. He might as well just come right out and say it, so that everyone is clear about it and there are no misunderstandings.
So he laughed lightly and said, ‘You’re overthinking it. I just don’t understand something. I want to ask you, but I don’t know where to start.’
Ruan Shaonan was a little curious, ‘What do you want to ask?’
Ling Luochuan paused for a moment, and asked with some melancholy, ‘How did you do it in the beginning?’
‘What?‘ Ruan Shaonan was puzzled.
Ling Luochuan looked at his watch and suddenly said without any sense, “Six days, eighteen hours, and thirty-two minutes.”
Ruan Shaonan was even more confused.
’I haven’t seen her for six days, eighteen hours, and thirty-two minutes. It feels like detoxing, watching the clock every day. I really don’t understand, how can you hold back?’
Ruan Shaonan smiled and said, ‘So that’s what this is about. It’s strange that someone like you can be so confused. If you miss her, just go find her. Holding a woman who looks like her and making love, won’t you miss her?’
Ling Luochuan simply slipped his watch off his wrist and threw it out the window, ‘You know her temper, don’t you? She usually looks submissive, but once pushed, she’ll fight to the death. For this kind of thing, it has to be consensual to be interesting. Do you want someone to bleed to death in your bed? Even if you get it, what’s the point? It’s better to buy a sex doll and save some energy.”
Ruan Shaonan couldn’t help but shake his head and sneer, “Why does everything become so bloody when it comes to you?”
Ling Luochuan sneered in the wind, ’You’re not bloody, you just kill without bloodshed.’
Ruan Shaonan looked at the road ahead and asked him with a half smile, ‘Have you ever seen a black market boxing match?’
Ling Luochuan immediately thought of Chi Mo, but he didn’t show it on his face, and just said, ‘Why did we get sidetracked here?’
“I just suddenly remembered that I once watched a local black market boxing match in Cambodia. A muddy ground surrounded by several metres of barbed wire, with the door locked. High voltage electricity was connected. Anyone who touches it will be incinerated in seconds. The people who entered were all children sold there by their parents, the youngest just 12 or 13 years old, and the oldest just 15 or 16. They were all skinny as a rake, but once they started fighting, the word ‘beast’ couldn’t even begin to describe them. The cruelty of their fighting was beyond your imagination. They didn’t consider themselves human, nor did they consider others human. In their eyes, life was just a bowl of gruel or a steamed bun.
Ling Luochuan listened quietly, intuiting that the real point was to come.
Sure enough, Ruan Shaonan continued, ‘To survive, they have no choice. Similarly, in this invisible arena of fame and fortune, we have no choice either. Therefore, I have always used the most effective methods to achieve the best results. No matter who she is, as long as she has something I want, I will just ask her for it. I only care about the result, not the process, and that is my principle.’
Ling Luochuan laughed lightly, playfully saying, ‘What a way to put it: “Just ask her for it”. I’d like to know, if someone is determined not to give you what you want, how are you going to get it?’
Ruan Shaonan smiled and said meaningfully, ‘The black market is not just a place where no one cares. You know what I mean.’
Ling Luochuan glanced at Ruan Shaonan and realised that he knew everything. However, what did it mean that the person who kept saying that he didn’t care was still paying so much attention to her every move?
Ruan Shaonan continued, ‘In this world, money can move mountains. And they are in dire need of money. If someone were to tell him that if he is willing to throw a fight, he will get ten times more than if he wins, do you think he would say yes? Once they are in the ring, it is you who decides whether they live or die. And here, as long as you bring the person to your territory and show her the live broadcast, she will do whatever you want. When you see the person splashing blood in the ring, what do you think she won’t give you?”
Ling Luochuan shook her head and laughed lightly, ’That’s not necessarily the case. If she’s determined to die, it’s up to you whether she lives or dies, but she’ll be there with you. If in the end she dies, and you’re left alone, isn’t that just a waste of time?”
Ruan Shaonan let out a long, leisurely sigh. ’If that’s really the case, the only thing you can do is let her go and die. There’s no point in thinking about a woman you can’t keep. From then on, you can stop thinking about her, stop missing her, stop being distracted by her, and you’ll feel at peace.’
Ling Luochuan turned his face to face the faint glow of the setting sun, looking at Ruan Shaonan, who was talking to him without looking away or changing expression. He didn’t know if the words of this person in front of him were true or a joke.
Even if it was a joke, it was already chilling. If it was the truth, then the depth of his thoughts, the depth of his character, the coldness of his temperament, and the viciousness of his methods had reached a point that was outrageous.
Ling Luochuan couldn’t help but sigh, ‘You’re ruthless. Courtship has become like revenge. You don’t need to push a weak and delicate girl to her death.’
Ruan Shaonan laughed lightly, ‘Who said I love her? I’m just discussing with you how to get the woman you want without bloodshed. You think she’s a weak woman, but my opinion is just the opposite. I remember that time at the top of the Yitian building, when I pinned her there and she bled all over the place, but she still kept her neck straight and kept on talking back to me. If you hadn’t reminded me later that this might be a ruse to lure me into a fatal trap, I would have been fooled. How many people in the world dare to risk their own lives in order to achieve their goals? Such people often seem gentle and obedient, and they look so pitiful. But if you give them the right opportunity, I’m afraid they’ll be more ruthless than anyone else.
As he spoke, it became light outside. Between the buildings of the city, there was a crimson morning glow and a sky as blue as a wash of indigo.
Ling Luochuan didn’t say anything else, and silently gazed across the few feet of morning light. Before him was a maze-like city, a narrow sky, and a cold crowd… So he imagined that if there was a pair of overlooking eyes in the sky, the sight of the city would be like a canvas in a wooden frame, unchanged for thousands of years. The same prosperity, the same crowds, the same backstabbing and insatiable greed.
He was very tired and had no energy to figure out the real purpose of Ruan Shaonan’s words. But there was no denying that he had uncovered a scar, a long-standing hidden illness that he had been unwilling to face.
He was the same as Ruan Shaonan. In Weixi’s heart, she had long ago written off both of them as the same kind of person, equally cold-blooded and selfish, equally disgusting. Therefore, she hated Ruan Shaonan as much as she hated herself.
That meant that for her, he was either to be let go or destroyed, and there was no way for them to be together again.
It turned out that the saddest thing in life was not having the luck, but when you suddenly wake up to what you have done, you find that everything has already been ruined and settled.
No matter how far you look, there is no turning back…
‘Maybe one day, we will all discover…’ Ling Luochuan leaned back in his seat, closed his eyes in the warm breeze, and said half-asleep, “Everything we have worked so hard to get is actually completely unimportant. And the things we want most, we can never get.”
Ruan Shaonan’s hand holding the steering wheel trembled slightly, a very light tremor, so light that even he himself was unaware of it. He turned his face and looked at Ling Luochuan, who was already sound asleep.
He suddenly remembered that half a year ago on a starry night with falling autumn leaves, that person had also fallen asleep in his car without any protection. He just looked at her quietly, as if he were looking at another life in another world. A kind of life that he knew nothing about and could do nothing about.
At that moment, he knew that the feeling that surged in his heart was not hatred, but excitement. A kind of freshness and curiosity that he had never experienced before and could not put into words.
He turned his face again and glanced at Ling Luochuan, thinking that these two people really had a lot in common.
Ruan Shaonan smiled at the rear-view mirror, a little envious of them at the moment. Since he had become an adult, he had never fallen asleep in front of others so boldly.
It was also his principle never to entrust his life and fortune to another person.
He knew that the words he had spoken today had already left a deep or shallow mark in his best friend’s heart, just as he knew that the phone call he had made that night would surely deal a fatal blow to someone.
He didn’t feel that he had done anything wrong. He had set the trap, but it was up to them to fall into it. He was not Ling Luochuan, and he did not have so much regret, guilt, loss, or sadness. He was an absolute egoist, neatly dividing the world into two clearly defined categories: what he wanted and what he didn’t want.
Ruan Shaonan smiled faintly as he faced the flaming morning sun, slightly moving his lips.
That was Wei Xi’s most feared smile, like a predator looking down from above, surveying his prey with an unyielding yet contemptuous gaze.
Then, with a smile, he would come over leisurely and end her life.
Chapter 39: ‘Hero’ rescues beauty
‘Every world has its own demons. As long as you stay in your own world, you know who the demons are. But once you cross the border, you won’t know who the angels are and who the demons are. But it’s okay. If the world judges you in an unjust way, you can also judge the world in your own way…’
Wei Xi wrote this sentence on the back of her notebook, then looked up and continued watching the big screen in the lecture theatre.
The professor pushed his glasses up and pointed to a colourful mural on the screen. ‘This is Michelangelo’s masterpiece, The Last Judgement, which he spent six years creating for the Sistine Chapel. It is named after the hymn The Last Judgement Day and Dante’s Inferno, from which it drew inspiration…’
A student raised his hand and asked, ‘Professor, I heard that when Michelangelo created this mural, all 400-odd people in the painting were naked. But why is there a diaper-like loincloth around everyone’s waist in this mural? Could it be that the master was afraid that they would wet themselves in fear in the presence of God, so he added it?’
There was a stunned silence for a second, followed by a loud laugh. The old professor shook his head and sighed, ‘My child, that’s called a loincloth. You may not have knowledge, but you should have some common sense; if you don’t have common sense, you should at least have some insight; if you don’t have insight, you should at least know how to hide it. When this masterpiece was unveiled, it caused a lot of controversy, and some people thought it was blasphemous. So soon after Michelangelo’s death, the Pope ordered that all the naked figures be given loincloths or clothing. And those commissioned painters were therefore mockingly called ‘underwear manufacturers’ by later generations.’
Everyone suddenly understood, and the professor continued, ‘The central theme of this fresco is the drama of life, which means that people are destined to constantly turn their backs on God, commit sins, but will ultimately be saved…’
The bell rang for the end of class, and the professor assigned homework before walking away with a stack of thick materials.
Wei Xi put her notes away and was about to put them in her backpack when they were suddenly snatched away by a pair of nimble hands. Looking up, she saw it was Zhou Xiaofan.
She was beaming from ear to ear, ‘Pretty girl, lend me your notes, I’ll be forever in your debt.’
Wei Xi saw that her eyes were red and knew that Miss Zhou had just gone to meet her boyfriend again. So she sighed, took out her notebook and wrote, ‘The exam is coming up soon, and you’re still messing around? This Professor Wu is famous for failing thousands of students, aren’t you afraid of failing him?’
Zhou Xiaofan made a face at her, put her notes in her bag, and laughed, ‘I know you’re a good student, so busy with your studies that you’ve neglected such a good boyfriend. I couldn’t do that. Our guy can’t be comfortable unless he sees me every day.’
Zhou Xiaofan’s ‘good boyfriend’ was Ling Luochuan, and Wei Xi had explained this to her many times. But she just wouldn’t believe it, and in the end, Wei Xi just gave up trying to explain.
Zhou Xiaofan, on the other hand, had recently met a young master from a wealthy family. According to her own words, that person was honest and upright, and definitely not a spoiled brat. The two hit it off, and after knowing each other for just a month, they were already making passionate vows and fighting endlessly.
Wei Xi had experienced the trials and tribulations of the fame and fortune circle, and knew that all the ‘princes and young masters’ with a bit of status and background liked to attract the attention of one or two beautiful female students from prestigious film and art schools to act as their figureheads. They took themselves to be the talented patrons of the Qinhuai brothels, self-appointed as romantic and refined, and with endless charm.
But she had never met Zhou Xiaofan’s boyfriend, so she couldn’t jump to conclusions or give him any advice. So she wrote on a piece of paper, ‘You need to be realistic. He’s a man with a family background, so he’ll always have a future. You’re fine with staying up all night with him, but if you let your studies suffer, it won’t be worth it.’
But Zhou Xiaofan was a silly girl who didn’t think about the consequences. She was just happy, thinking, ‘What if I do let my studies suffer? Haven’t you heard? A woman is only as good as her marriage. I’ve finally met a ‘new man’ with a house, a car, and a good job. I should grab him while I can. If I marry him, I won’t have to worry about anything in the future. I’ll be a happy young wife, with a carefree life.
Wei Xi just sighed after hearing this. She thought to herself, how could it be that easy? Men are getting more and more cunning these days. They don’t want to take a step further, they don’t want to say a word more, they calculate the gains and losses, and they are afraid of taking responsibility. You assess him, and he assesses you. No clever man wants to marry a woman who just wants to be a parasite. The more you figure out what’s going on in his mind, the more he despises you from the bottom of his heart. Even if he is willing to let you depend on him, it is not easy to watch the moods and frowns of other people every day.
The more vulnerable a woman is, the more she has to rely on herself. Only by respecting yourself can others find you lovely and respectable. This is a very simple truth, but the more progressive society becomes, the more confused its values become.
Men become pretentious when they become rich, and women also have their own price. Morality and integrity are in decline, and people are so used to it that they gradually come to accept it as the norm, thinking that this is just the way the world is. As a result, even an honest and kind-hearted girl like Zhou Xiaofan is thinking about marrying a rich man, thinking that she will have a carefree life and never have to worry about money.
The two walked out of the classroom, and Zhou Xiaofan chattered away the whole way. She is a warm-hearted person, and she was already on good terms with Wei Xi, so she was even more concerned about her after she was ‘robbed’ six months ago. The two often went in and out of school together, almost inseparable.
When they walked out of the school gate, they happened to see Zhou Xiaofan’s boyfriend waiting for her in a car.
This was the first time Wei Xi had seen him. Wrapped in an expensive suit, he looked decent, but his eyes were annoying, especially when he was looking at you.
‘Xiaofan, won’t you introduce me to this beautiful woman?’ The man put his hand on his girlfriend’s shoulder and said with a smile.
“Wei Xi, this is my friend, Xue Kai…’
Before Xiao Fan could finish introducing her, the man interrupted, ‘So you’re Lu Weixi. Xiao Fan has spoken of you often. She says you’re both smart and pretty, and a famous talent in your department. Now that I’ve seen you, I can see why you’re so famous.’
Weixi smiled gently, but inside she was thinking, ‘You’re more famous than you are good.’ This guy is obviously a frivolous and dissolute person, but why didn’t Xiao Fan see that?
‘An invitation is no substitute for a chance encounter. Let me be your host today. How about we find a quiet place to eat and drink?”
Zhou Xiaofan was naturally overjoyed. Wei Xi didn’t want to go at first, but Xue Kai insisted on inviting her. Wei Xi didn’t want to dampen Xiaofan’s enthusiasm, so she reluctantly followed him.
Xue Kai took them to the most luxurious restaurant in town, the ‘Panlong Tianfu’. Wei Xi had been to some fancy places before, but this was her first time at this one. It was said that the most prestigious people in town liked to gather here for dinner. Needless to say, it was extravagant and luxurious, with a grand atmosphere.
She couldn’t help but wonder, ‘Is it really necessary to make such a big deal of a meal for just three people?’
They entered the private room and saw that it was already bustling with activity, with a house full of people, both men and women, all in their twenties and thirties. The men were dressed in suits and the women were charming and graceful, and they were all extraordinary people with extraordinary style.
Zhou Xiaofan looked at her boyfriend suspiciously. Xue Kai laughed and put his arm around her to reassure her, ‘Don’t be afraid, they’re all my friends. We all agreed to bring our girlfriends and get together.’
Since they were friends of Xue Kai’s, they were naturally all from wealthy families. Zhou Xiaofan had never been to a scene like this before and was already scared half to death. She heard her boyfriend whisper in her ear, ‘I brought you here because I value you. You can be more outgoing, don’t let me lose face.’
She immediately nodded obediently and took the seat next to Weixi happily. A cute-looking girl sitting next to them struck up a conversation with them enthusiastically, filling their glasses with red wine while they talked.
Xue Kai introduced them to the various people at the table, and after everyone had exchanged pleasantries, the men began to toast them one after the other.
Zhou Xiaofan immediately said, ‘She has asthma and can’t drink, so I’ll drink for her.’
As soon as she said this, all the wine glasses pointed at her. Poor Xiaofan, a girl who had not yet left school, was no match for them. She could not refuse, and she had to offend people. However, after a few rounds, she was so drunk that she could not hold her own anymore.
Xue Kai didn’t care at this time, crossed his legs, and leaned face-to-face with a fiery girl next to him, talking and laughing. The other men and women also let their hair down, laughing and joking with their shoulders touching.
Wei Xi had sensed something was wrong a long time ago. Judging from the way these people looked, sounded and behaved, it didn’t seem like a gathering of friends, but more like a family reunion. She pulled on Zhou Xiaofan’s sleeve under the table, but the silly girl was so intent on pleasing Xue Kai that she was too busy to pay any attention.
Wei Xi pretended to go to the bathroom, but as soon as she stood up, she was stopped by Xue Kai.
‘Beauty, there is a bathroom in this private room, you don’t need to go outside,’ Xue Kai pointed to a door on the side of the private room.
Wei Xi smiled, picked up her bag and walked over, then locked the door behind her. She then opened her bag and took out her phone, trying to find someone to call for help.
But there was no signal even though her phone was inside. Wei Xi felt a little panicked and kept turning around with her phone in her hand.
Knock, knock, knock. Someone was knocking on the door outside. The voice was sweet. ‘Miss Lu, are you okay? Do you want me to come in and check on you? Mr. Xue’s girlfriend seems to have had a bit too much to drink and is looking for you.’
Wei Xi was worried about Xiaofan. As friends, she couldn’t just leave her outside alone. So she calmed down, turned on the tap and washed her hands, then turned around and opened the door.
The girl enthusiastically pulled her back to the table, poured her a glass of juice, and said with a smile, ‘Miss Lu, if you can’t drink, have some juice.’
Wei Xi noticed that the bottle she poured was open, and she knew in her heart that these ‘second-generation masters’ relied on their fathers’ money and were mostly lawless characters who were used to playing the “sugar-coated bullets” trick of spiking drinks.
Seeing that the girl was yielding, she took a sip, but didn’t swallow, just held it in her mouth, and when no one was looking, pretended to wipe her mouth and quietly spit on the napkin.
Zhou Xiaofan over here was already drunk and limp in her chair, her face like a peach blossom, her drunken eyes blurred, and she could only bow to beg for mercy. But those people were not willing to let go, and continued to pour it down her throat. Xue Kai, however, was sitting on the sofa with a beautiful woman in his arms, watching her laugh happily.
Xu Xi’s heart suddenly felt cold. What boyfriend and girlfriend? This brute was just bored and took the silly Xiaofan and teased and amused himself. Now that he was tired of playing innocent, he tricked people here and handed them over to this group of friends as entertainment.
But it’s no use getting angry. The question now is, how can she get away with this stupid girl intact? While she was racking her brains for a solution, a pair of lewd hands rested on her shoulders.
‘Beauty, don’t be so formal. Come, have a drink with me,’ the man said, pressing his stinking face against hers.
Wei Xi blocked with her hand, and half of the cup of bright red juice spilled onto the man’s noble suit trousers. The man’s face immediately changed, and he awkwardly wiped the water stains on his crotch, shouting in his mouth, ‘You spilled my pants, what’s wrong with you?’
Someone next to him teased, ‘Why be so fierce? Don’t scare the little girl.’ After saying this, he gave a wink.
The man immediately understood, with a smirk on his face, he came up again, put his arm around Weixi and wouldn’t let go, insisting that she drink the wine in the glass to make amends.
Wei Xi pushed him a few times, but not only did the other person not stop, he even pinched her chin and forced her to drink. Just then, there was a loud bang, and the door to the private room was kicked open.
The person in the prime seat stood up suddenly, about to lose his temper, but when he saw the person who had come, he froze. Then, everyone in the room was speechless, and without being reminded, they all stood up together.
Except for two people, one who was so drunk he didn’t know what was going on, and one who was so scared he was in a daze.
The person in the prime seat had already changed to a different face, smiling from ear to ear, saying, ‘Uncle Ling, so you’re here.’
Ling Luochuan glanced at Weixi, and the people behind him immediately understood, pulling out the chair next to her. He sat down gracefully, without saying a word, took out a cigarette and put it in his mouth, and immediately someone attentively offered him a lighter and lit it for him.
A cloud of smoke soon filled the room. Ling Luochuan leaned back in his chair and inhaled slowly, ignoring everyone else, ignoring Weixi, and not allowing anyone to sit down. The room was filled with well-dressed men and women, dressed in their finest clothes and jewellery. They stood there, looking at each other, afraid to say a word.
Usually, I’ve only heard of putting on airs, but today, Wei Xi really got to see it for herself. I thought to myself, this Ling Luochuan is even younger than Ruan Shaonan, less than thirty years old, so how can he be the elder among these people?
Is it really true that the sun is higher than the mountains? It’s not enough to be rich and powerful, you have to have an identity and background that people look up to in order to be able to dominate people everywhere?
Halfway through smoking a cigarette, Ling Luochuan turned his face and saw that there was still half of the juice in Wei Xi’s glass. He leisurely lifted it up and was about to drink it.
Someone was afraid that something would happen and immediately shouted, ‘Uncle Ling…’
Ling Luochuan immediately understood and put the glass aside. His narrow, long-eyed smile became even brighter. Then he stretched out his long arm and put the person next to him in his arms, smiling and asking, ‘Little baby, why didn’t you tell me you were coming here?’
Upon hearing these words, Xue Kai was so scared that he almost sat down.
Wei Xi looked at him and knew that this person was a master of mischief with a pot of fire on his face, a knife in his back, and no tolerance for mistakes. The happier he laughed, the more powerful his tricks would be. She didn’t dare get too involved with him, but right now, he was her and Xiaofan’s only lifeline. She knew that in every situation, you have to put on a show, so why wouldn’t she understand?
So, a smile at the man was enough. The man who had just been making her drink felt like his legs weren’t his own, and he was shaking badly.
Seeing the two of them like this, the person in the first seat immediately flattered, ‘So Miss Lu is Uncle Ling’s friend. Uncle Ling really has good taste. Only a girl as pretty and dignified as Miss Lu, with such extraordinary temperament, is worthy of such a noble man as Uncle Ling…’
Who knew that after hearing this, Ling Luochuan’s face sank, and he sneered, ‘I haven’t even asked you yet, and you’re already trying to pair us up. You want my people to drink with you? Haha, what a big face. I know all about the nasty things you do.’
These ‘second-generation masters’ usually act cocky and arrogant, but in the end they are just ‘embroidered pillows’ who have never seen the big world. When they met a really formidable person, they didn’t even have a single loud word. Everyone in the room was sweating and stood there in silence, except for Zhou Xiaofan’s snoring, and there was no movement at all.
The people accompanying him asked the waiter to change the glass and pour a drink. Ling Luochuan, however, lost interest and put it aside again. Turning his face, he looked at the person in his arms and asked, ‘Did you drink the drink in that glass?’
Wei Xi shook his head and wrote on the paper, ‘I spilled it.’
Ling Luochuan was relieved and turned his face around, narrowing his fierce eyes and surveying the group. He immediately laughed, ‘Don’t be afraid, I just want to ask two things. If you can explain clearly, that’s enough for today. If you can’t, there’s no need to say anything, I’ll only speak to your father!’
Hearing this, how could the people standing there not nod? They immediately obediently agreed, ‘Uncle Ling, you ask. We wouldn’t dare hide anything from you, even if we had the guts.’
Ling Luochuan smiled, pinched Wei Xi’s chin, and kissed her cheek before saying, ‘First, who brought her here? Second…’ The man turned his face, and in his blade-like gaze, there was no longer any trace of a smile, ‘Who put the stuff in the glass?’
Chapter 40: Out of the tiger’s den, and into the wolf’s lair
The two men led Zhou Xiaofan out of the restaurant, surrounded by a crowd of people. Ling Luochuan ordered the people accompanying him to take the silly girl home, and then put Weixi in his car.
Weixi took a handkerchief out of her bag and wiped her face, again and again. Ling Luochuan, sitting next to her, grabbed her hand and yelled, ‘I said, young lady, are you done yet? You’ve been wiping your face since we left the house, aren’t you afraid you’ll rub the skin off?’
The driver wisely closed the black partition window. Ling Luochuan was stunned for a moment, then sighed, ‘Other people rescue beautiful women, and I rescue beautiful women too. Other people get to hold the beautiful women, but I just kissed her, and I’m being disliked so much that even my own driver can’t bear to witness it.’ He sighed and sighed, as if it were true.
Wei Xi couldn’t help but laugh out loud, withdrew his hand, which was sore from being held, and wrote in her notebook, ‘I think, since this place is close to the city, you’d better drop me off up ahead. I don’t want to be like last time, walking from the suburbs to the city alone in my twelve guild high heels, in the hot sun, until my feet were all scuffed and bloody.’
Ling Luochuan almost let out a silent wail of despair at the sky, and sighed, ‘You’re really something. In just a few words, you not only took away all the credit I had, you also made me feel so guilty. Why? Is it so hard to say “thank you” to me?’
Wei Xi looked at him and wrote in her notebook, ‘Thank you! Please let me off.’
Ling Luochuan wanted to strangle her immediately! No, he should have strangled her when he first saw her! It would have saved him from being subjected to her constant abuse.
He laughed angrily and sneered, ‘I’m not letting you off, so what are you going to do about it? Today, I’m going to find out who is backing you up and letting you be so righteous with me. Do you know what it means to be unable to repay someone and to give your body to them? I don’t know, let me teach you!’
Wei Xi was stunned for a moment, looking at Ling Luochuan’s insidious face. She felt as if she had just escaped from the wolf’s den only to enter the tiger’s lair. She desperately tried to pull the car door open, but it had already been locked. How could she open it? She was so anxious and angry that she simply charged her whole body at it…
Ling Luochuan never imagined that just a joke would make her so desperate. He quickly embraced her, laughing and exasperated, ‘Baby, stop it! You’ll just kill yourself, and you won’t be able to open the door even if you do.”
Unexpectedly, when Wei Xi heard this, she became even more agitated and struggled even harder.
Ling Luochuan’s heart was filled with anxiety, and he forgot to be angry. He kept saying, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, is that okay?”
Wei Xi was stunned when she heard these words. She stopped struggling, but she was doubtful if she had heard it correctly.
Ling Luochuan apologised to her? This arrogant young master, Ling Daishou, apologised to her? No way! Even if the sky fell, the mountains flooded, the world ended, and the earth was destroyed…he would never admit fault to her. She must have heard it wrong.
Seeing that she had finally come to her senses, Ling Luochuan sighed, helped her brush the stray hair aside, shook his head and laughed lightly, ‘If I had known these three words were so effective, I would have just said them right away, and saved you from struggling with me.’
The car pulled up at the end of an alley. Wei Xi looked outside and asked the person next to her in sign language, ‘What are we doing here?’
Ling Luochuan opened the car door and pulled her out, saying, ‘You ruined a perfectly good meal. I don’t want any other benefits, but you should at least buy me dinner.’
Wei Xi heard this and immediately withdrew her hand, gesturing awkwardly, ‘Some other time, I didn’t bring that much money today.’
Ling Luochuan was amused, pushing the person in while saying, ‘Don’t worry, it won’t cost you much.’
The two walked to the depths of the alley before finding a small shop with a black wooden door and bluestone steps. The wooden signboard read the four large, black characters, ‘Unending Love.’
Wei Xi really didn’t expect Ling Luochuan, a noble and picky young master who drove a multi-million-dollar sports car and advocated enjoyment, to actually come to such a small place to eat.
When she walked in, she saw a few lacquered round tables scattered under a towering sycamore tree. Such small shops in back alleys mostly do business with regular customers. There weren’t many customers at the moment, and everyone was very casual.
Ling Luochuan was clearly a regular customer, and knew the place well, so he ordered the food without even looking at the menu. Wei Xi pinched her purse, still feeling apprehensive, afraid that she wouldn’t be able to pay the bill and he would laugh at her again.
Ling Luochuan naturally knew what she was thinking, and ignored her, just blowing on her tea and muttering to herself, ‘I haven’t eaten since this morning, and it’s finally time for someone to treat me. I can eat as much as I like.’
Wei Xi heard this and her face turned white with fear. When she looked up, she saw the shop rules written in bright yellow rice paper by the shopkeeper on the tree: ‘Take by guile, not by force; seek wealth, not harm others.’
Wei Xi knew that she had fallen into his trap today. What had she said? She would rather believe in ghosts than trust Ling Luochuan’s words.
As she watched Wei Xi, who was full of remorse and unable to sit still, Ling Luochuan leisurely sipped his iced jasmine tea, but his heart was filled with joy. He thought to himself, ‘You little brat, this is your day.’
Ling Luochuan ordered the Spicy Fragrant Pot and Charcoal-grilled Fish, very ordinary food, but with outstanding taste. Wei Xi had asthma and dared not eat too much, but she also praised it highly. Ling Luochuan was really hungry and ate with relish, his face flushed with the spiciness, and he kept saying it was delicious.
The main course came, and it was Wei Xi’s favourite, black sesame glutinous rice balls. Of course, it wasn’t ordered especially for her, because every time they went out to eat, Master Ling only ordered the things he liked.
Wei Xi bit a hole in the dumpling and carefully sucked the black sesame seeds that dripped out of the skin. It was sweet and delicious. Turning her head, she saw Master Ling holding a porcelain bowl in his hands, looking anxious, but he just didn’t dare to eat it. I knew it, he just ate too much chili earlier, and now it’s hot, sticky, and boiling hot, I’m afraid it’s not edible.
Wei Xi shook her head, feeling a motherly love well up in her. She treated him like a child. So she took the bowl from him and used a small spoon to transfer the food from one bowl to the other. She repeated this many times until the heat had dispersed. Then she gave him the bowl. She saw that there was still a piece of chili on the edge of his mouth, and she couldn’t help smiling. She took out her handkerchief and let him wipe his mouth.
Ling Luochuan took it and wiped his mouth a few times, but it didn’t come off. Wei Xi couldn’t bear to see it, so she took the handkerchief and wiped his mouth for him. The man first froze, then turned his head and laughed. Wei Xi didn’t understand what he was laughing at, and suddenly remembered her actions just now. She had been carried away by her emotions and seemed to have gone a bit too far with her casual actions, and her face flushed. She didn’t look at him again. She bowed her head and ate her own food. Ling Luochuan also became very quiet, but he laughed while eating. Suddenly, he felt that the glutinous rice balls here were even more sweet than usual.
The two of them had eaten quite a lot, and when they went to pay the bill, it was less than 100 yuan. Wei Xi took out her wallet and quickly paid the bill, and then she let out a sigh of relief.
After the meal, the two of them walked out of the alley. The autumn night sky was so high and vast, with the Milky Way casting a shadow and the jade-like sky dust-free. Above that dark blue cloud-covered sky was a perfect full moon.
‘Walk with me, okay?’ Ling Luochuan said.
Wei Xi bowed her head and thought about it for a moment, then nodded.
This is the old town, with its cobblestone streets, grey walls, and wisteria trellises…all the old marks left by time. At the moment, the heat of the day has long since subsided, and the night breeze, carrying the moisture from the leaves and the light fragrance of flowers and plants, is just right for a refreshing walk that makes one feel carefree and happy.
The two walked side by side, with the driver driving the car far behind. Wei Xi glanced at the man beside her out of the corner of her eye. Along the way, he had been silent, as if full of worries, a far cry from his previous domineering self.
As she pondered this, she suddenly saw two flame-red, interweaving phoenix trees standing on both sides of the street.
The night wind blew gently past their ears, and the fallen petals rained down in a red shower. The heavy, crimson petals looked like a red snowstorm, fluttering and drifting in the moonlight, covering the sky with flowers.
The two of them were so mesmerised that they could not help but stop and watch the red rain of flowers fall from the sky, covering them in a shower of petals. They were bathed in the colourful red rain of falling flowers, as if they were walking in a sad dream.
Usually, they only say that flowers are in bloom when they are in full bloom, but they don’t know that when the flowers fall, they are actually so sad.
Wei Xi reached out and caught the crimson petals. She suddenly remembered the cherry blossoms in Japan that Chi Mo had described to her. She wondered if they were also so beautiful when in full bloom, with ‘a million red petals floating in the wind, but falling silently’.
She also remembered that Xiao Wen had said before she died that she wanted to go see the Great Wall in Beijing and the cherry blossoms in Japan. Now, as she saw the fallen blossoms covering the ground, she couldn’t help feeling sad.
Ling Luochuan, standing nearby, saw her looking at the beautiful scene before her, but with a hint of sadness in her eyes. He couldn’t help but ask her, ‘What’s wrong?’
Wei Xi shook her head and wrote on a piece of paper, ‘Nothing, I suddenly thought of a friend, and it made me feel a little sad.’
Ling Luochuan thought she was thinking of Chi Mo, and it made him feel a little uncomfortable, so he asked, ‘What kind of friend? Male or female?’
‘A good friend, female, went to a very faraway place six months ago.’
Ling Luochuan was a little curious, ‘Where did she go?’
Wei Xi looked at him and wrote two words on the paper: ‘Hell.’
Ling Luochuan froze when he saw the two dark words. Wei Xi ignored him and walked on alone.
Ahead was the lotus pond in the old town. It was early autumn in September, and the pond was full of red lotuses in bloom, just as the saying goes: ‘Green lotuses cover the green water, and the red lotuses are dressed in red.’ At a glance, the water is clear and cool, the willows are shrouded in mist, and under the crowded lotus leaves, the clear blue water reflects the stars in the sky.
Wei Xi was a little tired, so she sat down on a stone by the shore and looked at the lotus pond in the moonlight.
Ling Luochuan sat next to her, still upset about the conversation earlier, and asked, ‘She’s dead?’
Wei Xi nodded, not understanding why Master Ling was so interested in this matter.
Unexpectedly, he laughed after hearing this and said, ‘Then she may not necessarily be in hell, she may be in heaven.’
Wei Xi pointed at the sky in confusion, ‘In heaven?’
“Yes, a person on earth is a star in heaven. I read in a book that the dead will become stars in heaven. Because someone misses them, they have not died and will always live on in your heart.’
Wei Xi smiled and wrote on the paper: ‘Don’t try to sweet-talk me with that kind of stuff, it’s long outdated. If all the dead people ran to the sky, where would there be room for them all?’
Ling Luochuan was happy to see her smile again, and not caring about anything else, he just followed her words and asked, ‘If the dead don’t live in the sky, what should they live in?’
Wei Xi smiled and wrote, ‘They live among the immortals. So, you must never do anything bad. There are gods everywhere, watching over us.’
‘Do they know everything?’
‘Maybe.’
Ling Luochuan turned his face and looked at a pool of red lotuses blooming in the breeze in the moonlight, and whispered, ‘Do they know…how much I like you?’
Chapter 41: A fatal omen
When Wei Xi returned home, it was almost dawn. She saw a note on the table left by Chi Mo. The note roughly said that he would be away for a few days, and that she should take care of herself. If there was anything, she should discuss it with Ru Fei. He also left them some money and the emergency contact number.
Wei Xixi put the note down and couldn’t help but sigh. This wasn’t the first time. Every time she helped Wei Chengbao with something, he would disappear for a few days until the heat died down.
Every time he went out, she worried herself sick, but there was nothing she could do. Chi Mo was short of money, and everyone in the red light district knew it. Wei Chengbao saw this and handed him over whenever there was something dangerous.
The rich pay for their lives, while the poor sell their lives. The more noble a person is, the less blood they have on their hands, and they don’t even smell of blood. Sometimes the world is so simple, and yet so unfair.
Wei Xi poured herself a glass of milk, stood on the balcony, and looked across the few feet of the setting sun. The afterglow of the morning sun shone through the gaps between the buildings and reflected on the glass windows of the building opposite, like a bright red stain of blood.
They say God is fair, but people living in pigeon buildings have less chance than others to enjoy the sunshine.
Some people are born with a golden key, and the first thing they see when they open their eyes is a beautiful landscape. Some people are born with nothing, and even if they open their eyes wide, all they see is darkness.
Poverty is not sad, but when you try your best to do everything right, those who don’t even need to try can ruin everything you’ve worked for with just a word, a gesture, or even a raised eyebrow.
‘There is a God three feet above your head,’ she told Ling Luochuan a few hours earlier. Wei-xi looked up and looked at the narrow strip of sky above the city. With such a small gap, people are like ants caught in a rock, barely surviving. No wonder God can’t see.
She finished the milk in her cup, went back to bed, and fell asleep soon after.
In her dream, at one point, fallen red flowers formed a field, their remnants filling the ground. At another, the fragrance of lotuses filled the air, and the moon was as white as a piece of silk. Finally, her eyes were filled with snowflakes dancing lightly in the air, covering the sky and the ground. The snowflakes were red, cold and desolate, like bright red blood spurting from a vein.
Mountains, rivers, trees, everything in the world had turned one colour, bright red like blood.
Three days later, Ru was painting on the balcony when she was asked, ‘What did you say to Ling Luochuan?’
Ru stopped what she was doing, looked at her with confusion, and gestured, ‘What do you mean?’
“Everyone in the circle says that he has recently fallen for a female student at the Academy of Fine Arts, and has already announced to the world that he will never set foot in any place of lust again. He also said that, even if there were thousands of beautiful women, he would only take one to drink from the cup of love. It sounded like he was saying that he would abandon all the other women in the palace and only love one from now on. I said, ‘Auntie, this is no laughing matter, you’d better explain it to me.’
‘He said that at the time, and I thought he was joking, but who knew he was serious.’
Ruxi rolled her eyes, ‘Auntie, so what did you promise him that made him so excited and high-profile?’
Wei Xi could only put the paintbrush aside again and explain, ‘I didn’t promise him anything. He told me by the lotus pond that he really liked me. But I already told him very clearly that it was impossible for us. He asked again if it was okay to be just friends. I said that if we got to know each other, we would already be friends. That was it…’
Ru Fei looked at her suspiciously and asked, ‘Is that really all?’
After thinking for a while, she replied, ‘There was also this: He asked me if I hated him. I said I didn’t. He asked me why I didn’t. I said, ’You and Yuen Shiu-nan are friends through thick and thin, but I’m just someone you met by chance. You are partners, but I have nothing to do with you. In terms of work and personal matters, and in terms of emotions and reason, of course you will side with him. I won’t just blame someone else for my misfortune. There is a master for every grievance, and even if I want to hate someone, it won’t be you.‘ She thought about it some more, gesturing, “I think that’s about it, there’s nothing else.”
If I wasn’t speechless, I would have been for a long time, exasperated, saying, “You, you…you really leave me speechless.”
’Then don’t say anything. I guess Master Ling will just be fresh for a few days, and he’ll forget about it after a while.’
‘My goodness, don’t you know who Ling Luochuan is? He’s domineering, petty, vindictive and unpredictable. If he forgets to pour the wine, what happens if he doesn’t forget? Do you really want to be friends with him? He’s obviously up to no good, so how can he behave properly towards you? When the time comes, if he doesn’t get what he wants, there’s no guarantee that he won’t resort to despicable means. What will you do then?’
Wei Xi thought for a moment and then signed, ‘He said that if I’m willing to be his friend, he can guarantee two things: first, he won’t lie to me again; second, under any circumstances, he will do his best to protect me from harm. After spending time together recently, I feel that he’s not as bad as you think. Besides, we’re just going to be ordinary friends, so there’s no reason for me to reject him.’
If she hadn’t looked, she would have been beside herself with anger. She shouted in exasperation, ‘Weixi, don’t be fooled by his sweet talk. Haven’t you suffered enough at the hands of people like him?’
If it weren’t for her concern, she wouldn’t have said it. But Weixi heard every word and took it to heart. The words were like a knife, stabbing her in the heart. This careless action by her best friend was even more difficult to bear than if she had done it on purpose.
Weixi looked down at the messy paint on the floor in a daze, then turned around and continued painting her own.
Rushing about like a fire, Ruifei was oblivious to the situation and continued to ramble on, ‘Even if he can behave himself, what about you? Can you really let go of the past? He is so close to that person, what will you do when you run into that scoundrel in sheep’s clothing? What will happen when Chi Mo finds out? He has just left for a few days, and I have already let you get into this state. When he returns, how am I going to explain to him? God, I just don’t dare to think about it.’
She felt like a rat in a hot pot, pacing around the room. Finally, she slumped down in a chair, completely at a loss. After a while, she suddenly had an idea. She was shocked by her own thought, but this flash of inspiration was like a horrible viper, coiling around her heart.
She looked up and saw Weixi, who was painting with her back to her in the backlight, and stammered, ‘Weixi…you’re not…’
According to some experts, for every 2 degrees Celsius rise in temperature, the national rape rate rises by 1%. So should a woman who goes out at night be given a dagger or a condom? Listeners, this is the topic we are discussing today. On hearing this topic, you may be thinking, needless to say? Of course it’s a dagger. Haven’t China’s thousands of years of traditional values placed a woman’s chastity above her life? Introduction I want to tell you about a husband in Chicago who puts a condom in his wife’s bag every time she goes out. His explanation is that they live in a neighbourhood with a high incidence of violent crime, and there are many drug addicts infected with AIDS. He is currently unable to afford to move his wife to a safer place, but at least he can let her protect herself in the safest way possible…
Ling Luochuan smiled. He never listens to the radio when he drives, but today he happened to turn it on for no particular reason, and found that the topic was right up his alley, so he turned the volume up a little.
I wonder how the husbands and boyfriends listening to the radio feel at this moment? Perhaps you think this husband is crazy, and maybe even the female listeners find it incredible. But have you ever thought about it? Will carrying a dagger definitely protect you from harm? The answer is of course no. So is wearing a condom necessarily a sign of submission? The answer is also no. On the contrary, it is just a way for a weak woman to love, cherish and protect herself when she has no choice. Women are a vulnerable group in the eyes of men. However, they have to shoulder the same responsibilities as men in society…
The florist’s shop arrived, and Ling Luochuan switched off the radio with some reluctance, deciding that in the future he would have to catch the host’s programme, because it was rare to find such an insightful and bold host.
Walking into the florist’s shop, he saw a sea of beautiful flowers. Ling Luochuan smiled. This was the first time he had been in a place like this, and he was a little dazzled, not knowing where to start.
The florist’s owner came over and asked with a smile, ‘Sir, buying flowers for your girlfriend?’
Ling Luochuan looked back and saw that the shopkeeper was about thirty years old, with big wavy curls and a fiery red bohemian long dress, looking like a real beauty.
‘It’s the first time I’ve sent flowers, so I don’t know what she likes.’
‘Then send birthday flowers. No woman doesn’t like her own birthday flowers.’
‘Birthday flowers?’
“Yes, each zodiac sign has its own birthday flower. I wonder what your girlfriend’s zodiac sign is? I have a zodiac flower chart here that can help you choose the right birthday flowers for her.’
Ling Luochuan thought for a moment, ‘I don’t know anything about astrology, but I remember that she was born on October 25th.’
The beautiful shopkeeper smiled mysteriously, ‘So she’s a Scorpio. No wonder she has such an outstanding boyfriend as you. Scorpio girls are all seductive and deadly like poison. The purple hyacinths are perfect for her, they’re elegant, sexy and mysterious. Look, those are the ones.’
She pointed to a bouquet of flowers in a crystal vase, shyly gathered into a bunch, bright and lovely, with dewdrops on the petals, and complemented by tender green leaves.
Ling Luochuan looked at it standing tall among the flowers, and felt that it was quite a match for Weixi. He couldn’t help but smile and say, ‘She’s skinny, just like this flower, so this one will do.’
The shopkeeper nodded, and while wrapping the flower for him, said, ‘Although she is skinny, I can tell that she must be a very attractive girl. Scorpio girls have this quality: they don’t need to be plump, or even pretty, but every smile and frown can arouse the primitive desire of the opposite sex. Some people say that a Scorpio girl is like a drug. Once you get hooked, there are only two outcomes: either you quit or you die.’
Ling Luochuan laughed, unconvinced, ‘No way, is it that scary?’
The beautiful shopkeeper also laughed and explained, ‘This is of course sensationalism. But sir, you must remember that Scorpio women have a strong sense of revenge. Once you offend her, she won’t get angry, but will retaliate directly. The most terrifying thing is that they will definitely seek revenge for any grudges they have, and they are often more calm and self-controlled when taking revenge than usual, and they don’t even care if they destroy everything. If you wrong her, then you can watch out.’
Ling Luochuan suddenly felt a little uncomfortable when he heard this. Gao Zhi’s emotions had also dropped by seven or eight points.
The shopkeeper wrapped the flowers and sprayed some water on them before handing them to him. Ling Luochuan took out his wallet to pay the bill. The shopkeeper immediately understood when he saw his displeased expression, and was afraid that his previous joke had upset the man.
So he smiled and said, ‘Sir, the idea of astrology is just a rumour, so you can’t believe it completely. As the saying goes, there is no such thing as an unsuitable star sign, only an unsuitable person. If you don’t mind, could you tell me the exact hour of your girlfriend’s birth, and I’ll help you calculate it, it might be useful in the future.’
‘This is a flower shop, do you also tell fortunes here?’
“To be honest with you, our family has been fortune tellers for generations. But my grandfather and the others used the I Ching, while I prefer astrology, which is more in line with the tastes of young people. I used to be a professional fortune teller and travelled to many countries. Most people in our profession die young. My grandfather and father died before they reached 50, and I didn’t want to follow in their footsteps, so I returned to China and opened this flower shop.”
Ling Luochuan listened to her talk about the supernatural, and although he was a person who was not afraid of anything, he couldn’t help but be a little curious, “Is it really that accurate?”
The shopkeeper smiled, ’I can only say that numerology is really amazing. When supernatural phenomena happen right in front of your eyes, you can’t help but believe. Before it happens, all speculation is futile. If you’re interested, I’ll do a calculation for you. It’s always good to listen, believe it or not.”
Ling Luochuan recalled the date of birth on the medical records he had read for Weixi and said, “She was born in 1988, but I don’t know the exact time.”
The shopkeeper recited it silently, paused for a moment, and then asked with a smile, ’I wonder if it’s convenient for you, sir, to write down your girlfriend’s name?’
Ling Luochuan thought, since the flowers were going to be delivered to the school anyway, the name would have to be left, so there was no need to avoid it, and he wrote it down on the paper.
Who knew that when the shopkeeper saw those three characters, her face instantly changed, but she kept her head down, and Ling Luochuan didn’t see it.
After a while, she looked up and said with a smile, ‘Sir, judging from the date of birth, her eight characters are not very good, so she was born weak and sickly. In terms of astrology, her guardian star is Pluto, but Pluto is dominated by yin, and yin and yin counteract each other, so it is not auspicious. Therefore, your girlfriend is a hardworking person with a difficult fate. I am afraid that she will have a hard life with many hardships and disasters… Don’t worry, from your facial features, you are a blessed person. So as long as you keep an eye on her at all times, even if she has a fatal destiny, with your protection, she will definitely turn misfortune into good fortune and turn disaster into blessings.”
Ling Luochuan was slightly relieved. He also heard that he was the guardian of Wei Xi, so they were a match made in heaven. So without asking any more, he took down the address, asked the shopkeeper to deliver it to the school for him, and left happily.
After Ling Luochuan left, the shop owner instructed the florist to deliver the flowers immediately, and also reminded him that this customer was either wealthy or noble, so he must not be rude. Then she sat down, found her fortune-telling book, turned to a new page, and wrote in red ink:
Xizhe, dawn. If not Xizhe, then born before dawn. The eight characters are: Wuchen, Renshou, Renzi, Ranyan; the five elements are water flourishing, lacking fire and metal.
Seven killings enter the palace, hugging the tiger to sleep, a weak family connection, mutual opposition from relatives, digging a well with no water, lonely and helpless. Opposing father, mother, friends, husband and self, a fatal destiny.
The shop owner closed the notebook and thought about the girl’s seven killings fate, but she was also destined to have a love life. Such a woman often has an unimaginable attraction to men who are powerful and influential, but is destined to be bullied by such men for her whole life. Then she remembered that she was a Scorpio, the sign of the zodiac that likes to hold a grudge and is the most adept at revenge.
So, she couldn’t help but lament, ‘Such a lucky person, fortunately born in peaceful times, so that she won’t bring disaster to the country and its people. If she were born in troubled times, I’m afraid she would bring ruin to her family, her city, her country, and the world…’
Ling Luochuan returned to the company from the flower shop, his mind unsettled and full of thoughts, with no resolution in sight. So he asked his secretary to cancel a few meetings and evening business engagements, and drove alone to Weixi’s school. When he arrived, it was still early, so he drove around the nearby roads in circles.
When it was finally time for school to let out, he parked the car in front of the school gate and walked down to wait for Weixi by the car door.
After the school bell rang, students came out in groups of two or three.
This prestigious art school had a different student body from other schools, with so many outstanding and talented people gathered in one place. It was not clear whether it was the school’s rich and mellow artistic atmosphere that had influenced them, or whether they had added a different kind of brilliance to this traditional art palace. In particular, the girls with their painting boards on their backs, just standing there watching them, gave a pleasing and refreshing feeling.
After waiting for about a quarter of an hour, Ling Luochuan saw Weixi and Zhou Xiaofan walk out together. Even in a crowd of outstandingly beautiful people, he could see her at a glance. From the first time they met, he had sensed that this girl had an unimaginable sense of presence. Even standing among thousands of people, she could not be ignored.
Wei Xi was wearing a pink dress, carrying her school bag and clutching a stack of books. Holding the purple hyacinths he had given her, Zhou Xiaofan looked as if he was telling her something, and Wei Xi tilted her face to one side to listen attentively.
In fact, he liked her profile better than her delicate face, just as he had when he first saw her at the ‘Perfect Beauty’ contest. She was so unaware of the effect she had on others.
Ling Luochuan went up to her, thrust the chilled lemon tea he had just bought into her hands, then took her book with one hand and unhooked her backpack from her shoulders with the other. All of his movements were fluid and seamless, and they were so quick that Wei Xi was left dumbfounded. Before she could react, he had already put her things into the car.
Zhou Xiaofan, who was standing to the side, couldn’t stop laughing. When she saw Ling Luochuan walking back, she quickly straightened up and said seriously, ‘Young Master Ling, where’s mine? You can’t just remember Weixi and forget me.’
Who knew that he would suddenly pull a magic trick and take another can out from behind his back and place it in Xiao Fan’s hands. Then he smiled and his beautiful fuchsia eyes curved, and he said with a charming air, ‘How could I neglect such a lovely girl as Xiao Fan…’ Before he finished speaking, he suddenly leaned over Xiao Fan’s ear and lowered his voice to help create an ambiguous atmosphere and said, ‘Let’s find an opportunity to go out and play alone, without her. What do you say?’
Zhou Xiaofan was so happy that she was shaking like a leaf. She said to Wei Xi, who was standing nearby, ‘I’m asking you, do you want this man or not? If you don’t hide him well, I’m going to steal him.’ Then she turned to Ling Luochuan and said, ‘Mr. Ling, I’ll take the drink, but I can’t give you the flowers. Wei Xi has asthma and is allergic to pollen. The hyacinths have a very strong fragrance, and if she smells them in your car, she could have an attack. I think you should let me have them.”
Ling Luochuan then realised that he had been careless. But he said with a serious face, “Actually, I bought them for Xiao Fan, but I was afraid that you wouldn’t want them, so I had to give them to you in Wei Xi’s name. You can keep them, as long as you understand my good intentions.”
Xiao Fan laughed even more happily, ’Young Master Ling, if you say that again, I’ll take it seriously. Okay, I’ll leave you two alone now that I’ve done my job as a third wheel.’
Ling Luochuan smiled and said, ‘Let’s take you home first.’
Xiao Fan waved his hand and laughed, ‘I know you love me because of my house, but I can’t be so inconsiderate. You guys don’t have to worry about me, I’ll take the bus home, it’s very convenient.’
After Xiao Fan had left, Wei Xi finally had some free time and wrote on a piece of paper: ‘I thought you had a dinner engagement tonight? Why are you here all of a sudden?’
‘I haven’t seen you all afternoon and I’m feeling a bit restless. Do you have anything planned for tonight?’
Wei Xi thought for a moment and wrote: ‘I still haven’t finished the homework the professor assigned.’
“Then have dinner with me. I’ll take you home afterwards. I won’t take up any more of your time, okay?’
Wei Xi looked at this man who was smiling in a very ordinary way, but she could clearly feel that there was something unusual about him, and nodded.
After getting into the car, Ling Luochuan asked Wei Xi, who was fastening her seat belt, ‘Where are we going to eat?’
Wei Xi looked at him and asked in sign language, ‘Are you okay?’
Ling Luochuan was momentarily stunned, and then laughed and said, ‘Why do you ask that?’
Wei Xi took out a notebook and wrote, ‘You’ve always said what to eat, and you’ve never asked me like this before. Something’s been wrong since earlier. What’s wrong with you?”
The man laughed and said, “I’m being gentle with you, and you say I’m wrong. It’s better to be fierce in the future. If you don’t say anything, let’s go eat Thai food. I know a restaurant that’s pretty good.”
Wei Xi didn’t say anything else. Ling Luochuan lowered his head and started the engine. The car was like a gust of wind, and in the dusk of the city, it disappeared into the distance…
Chapter 42: Carnal Desire
Perhaps it was the spicy and sour Thai food that didn’t really hit the spot, or perhaps it was the overly pretentious exotic atmosphere created by the Thai music, sarongs and nail-polishing dance, or perhaps it was just a really bad day. In any case, Ling Luochuan, who always had an excellent appetite, suddenly lost his usual standards. After just a few bites, he put down his chopsticks. He stared at the stage, looking worried, and no one knew what he was thinking.
Wei Xi didn’t like the taste of Thai food very much, and as he watched Ling Luochuan get bored, he felt even more lost. After staring at the man across the table for a while, he finally couldn’t hold back any longer and waved his hand in front of his eyes, using sign language to ask, ‘What’s wrong with you?’
Ling Luochuan turned his face around, and a pair of beautiful, clear eyes looked at her with such sincerity and concern. Only then did Wei Xi realise that this man originally had a pair of eyes that could speak. Just as at that moment, he had clearly not said anything, but those eyes seemed to have said so many things to her between glances. Those eyes were so pure and so clean that she, who was like a startled bird, could not feel the slightest bit of ill will.
After experiencing so much hurt and pain, and having been on the brink of life and death several times, her life has been full of ups and downs like the changing of the seasons. She doesn’t know why she still feels this way. The man sitting in front of her is clearly a man who does whatever he wants and treats all the rules in the world like they are worthless. But she just feels that such a man is a dark hero who can lead her out of the tragedy, and she can trust him with her whole heart. She doesn’t need to worry, she just needs to give him everything…
Wei Xi shifted her eyes away, her heart pounding like a fawn, racing around and around in her chest. Ling Luochuan shook his head and teased, ‘Don’t look at me like that in the future, like a bashful little bunny. If I misunderstand and think you’re falling for me, and then I can’t help but devour you in one bite, don’t blame me.’
Wei Xi burst out laughing, thinking to herself: This is Ling Luochuan, and no matter how evil he does something, he will be able to deny it completely.
The man on the other side let out a long sigh, saying, ‘You can laugh about this. I’ve noticed that you’re really not afraid of me anymore.’
Upon hearing this, Wei Xi couldn’t help but be taken aback. It was only after he said that that she realised that she really wasn’t afraid of him anymore. Why was that so?
She had never felt this sense of security with Ruan Shaonan.
When the two of them were together day and night, when he was professing his love for her and their lips were entwined, even when their bodies were pressed together, she knew that somewhere in her heart she had always been afraid of him.
Was it a deep-rooted fear that came from the heart? Or was it a warning from her sixth sense about impending disaster?
Unfortunately, at that time, she was confused by the memories of her youth, unable to hear or see anything.
She smiled and wrote on the paper, ‘Why do you have to make me afraid of you? You said it yourself, we’re friends. Friends should be equals, right? Why do we have to distinguish between high and low, noble and lowly?’
Ling Luochuan looked up at her and said, ‘But I’m getting more and more afraid of you, to the point of being scared to death.’
“What are you afraid of?’
The man looked at her and said very seriously, ‘I’m afraid that you will be sad, that you will be upset, that you will be bullied, and that you will bully me. I’m afraid that you will be hurt by the past, that you will be hurt by the future, and that I will deliver my heart to you with all my strength, only to end up heartbroken and miserable. The more I get to know you, the more afraid I become. The deeper my obsession with you becomes, the more afraid I become. But what I fear most is myself.’
Wei-xi trembled involuntarily when she met the man’s focused gaze. Ling Luochuan smiled and continued, ‘You are not a man, and you are not me. So you will never know the greedy and terrible desires, the vile and shameless thoughts, that this man sitting in front of you has for you. Do you find Ruan Shaonan terrifying? In fact, I can be even more ruthless and terrifying than he is. But, Wei-xi, I cannot do this. Because I am not him, I cannot choose rules over humanity and the rules of the game like he does. He has abandoned all morality and the bottom line of his conscience, choosing an easy path with no guilt and no mercy. But I cannot do that. I cannot push you to the end of the road, while watching you, bloody and torn, from the sidelines like a stranger. Because that is not someone else, that is you, the you I think about every day and worry about constantly. I am suffering terribly because of this. I hug every woman who looks like you, hoping against hope and feeding on fantasies. But I am tired of this futile existence. Those women are beginning to disgust me. Sometimes I hate you so much that I want you to die. You have made me weak. Only when you are dead will I be able to find peace. Only when you are reduced to ashes will I be able to let go. Do you understand this feeling of love and hate, of fear and dread?
The man spoke with grace and calm, like a true gentleman, only the unspeakable madness in his eyes betrayed his emotions.
Wei Xi’s heart was pounding wildly. She lowered her head and wrote on the paper with trembling hands, ‘I believe you, you won’t hurt me, right?’
Ling Luochuan raised the corner of his lips in a smile, ‘You believe me? You still don’t know what I really want to do to you, and you say you believe me?’
He held out his hand in the dim light, stroked her cheek, and closed his eyes gently. His breath was deep, his tone calm, but there was immeasurable passion and sensuality.
“I want to lock you up, lock you away from the light of day, so that no man can see you. I want to embrace you day and night, like the morning air. I want to enjoy you to the full, like a magnificent feast. I want to possess you fiercely, like an exclusive sacrifice. I will strip you alive, like a lovely but mischievous mermaid. Your hair, your lips, your beautiful limbs, your soft body, every inch of your skin, everything about you…’ His long fingers suddenly closed around her chin. He breathed heavily, ’Mine, all mine. You don’t need to think, you don’t need emotions, you don’t need reason, you don’t even need to be awake. Because if you open your eyes, you will hate me with a bloodthirsty rage. Don’t even think about anyone coming to save you, anyone who stands in my way will die a horrible death…”
His breath was hot, but his fingers were cold as ice. Wei Xi trembled under his fingers. The terrifying atmosphere made her shiver.
Feeling her bone-chilling fear, the man opened his eyes and tilted his head, looking at her with fascination, as if he were looking at a treasured work of art. His long fingers slid from her cheek to her neck, and his thumb stroked the scar that had once been covered in blood and flesh. He whispered, ‘You’d better believe that I not only have the ability, but also the ambition. But you don’t need to be afraid, I won’t let you suffer more than you can bear. Because no matter how much pain you feel, it will never be as much as mine. Every time I look at you like this, it’s like a starving man sitting in a restaurant, unable to eat the food in front of him, and the feeling is almost driving me crazy. So, every day I have you, I want you to enjoy the same madness as me. I will caress you, devour you, torture you, and tear you apart. I will make you cry, make you hurt, make you scream and shout… Oh, that’s right, you can’t shout. But I will make you so weak that you can’t even move, so you can’t even die, so you will forget everything in the world, and beg me to let you go…’
The man paused, looked at the woman in his hands, and asked softly, ‘Baby, why are you so scared that your face has turned white?’
Seeing that Wei Xi was staring at him, her eyes wide, not daring to breathe, he laughed, slamming his hands on the table. ‘I was joking, you’re not going to take me seriously, are you?’
After laughing for a while, he saw that Wei Xi hadn’t responded and was still staring at him in a daze. Ling Luochuan waved his hand in front of her eyes, ‘Hey, Wei Xi, let’s stop fooling around, don’t scare me.’
Seeing that she still didn’t respond, he became a little anxious. He stood up and grabbed her shoulders, shaking her back and forth. ‘Little miss, will you answer me?’
Wei Xi came back to her senses, looked at him for a while, and then withdrew her hand and wrote on the paper: ‘If there really comes a time like that, I just hope that person is not you.’
Ling Luochuan was truly surprised. ‘Why?’
Wei Xi looked at him and continued writing: ‘That night at the lotus pond, I told you that I would rather die than let someone I don’t love kiss me. I would rather die than have sex with someone I don’t love. If God wants to put me in that situation, then I have no choice but to die. You just said that you wouldn’t push me to the end of the road because you couldn’t bear it. After going through those things six months ago, I told myself that God is blind and the gods are long dead. I no longer have any faith and rely only on myself to fight against fate. But at this moment, I am willing to believe in you. So, if there really comes a day when I have to descend into hell, I have no other wish but to hope that the person who puts me to death is not you.’
Ling Luochuan snorted after reading it, took her hand and kissed it lightly, smiling, ‘Tricky girl, I was going to take this opportunity to let my animal instincts run wild, but you put me down with such a high hat, so I had to hold back.’
Wei Xi shook her head and wrote, ‘I won’t show off my cleverness in front of you, because I’m not in the same league as you. I’ve staked my life and fortune, betting on your conscience.’
Chapter 43: A silver lining
This time, Ling Luochuan kept his word. After dinner, he sent Wei Xi home before eight.
‘The food at this restaurant is getting worse and worse. Next time, let’s go to another one.’
Wei Xi smiled and said in sign language, ‘Drive carefully.’ She picked up her things and prepared to go upstairs.
‘Oh, I almost forgot.’ Ling Luochuan held her back. ‘I originally wanted to ask you out today because I have something for you.’
Wei Xi glanced back at him, and he immediately obediently let go of her hand. Then he took out a set of keys and placed them in her hand, ‘These are the keys to my place, the place you went to last time. If you ever can’t get home without the keys, just go to my place, don’t wander the streets in your pajamas by yourself. And this…’ He took out a small embroidered bag and took out a note from it, handing it to her.
When Wei Xi looked down, she saw that it said Ling Luochuan’s company address, villa address, as well as his mobile phone number, landline number, company phone number…all the contact information he could think of was written on it. In addition, there was even a small line of text written at the bottom: This woman is forgetful and prone to getting lost. If anyone finds her, please return her immediately, and the owner will be very grateful. However, if there is the slightest damage, the owner will pursue it to the end, so please consider carefully.
Wei Xi laughed. Ling Luochuan put the note back in the embroidered bag, hung it around Wei Xi’s neck, and said, ‘I’ve laminated the note, so it’s rainproof. Wear it every day from now on. In the future, if you have a relapse on the street, just look down and you’ll find me, even if no one else does. You won’t get lost.’
Wei Xi looked at the delicate embroidered bag and asked in sign language, ‘Where did you get the idea?’
‘It was a coincidence. The other day I watched a movie where the male lead was even worse off than you. He could only remember things that happened within fifteen minutes, so he carried around a lot of little notes and had his lover’s name tattooed on his body. I can’t tattoo anything on you, it would hurt and look ugly, so I had to let you wear it.”
Wei Xi was a little curious and asked in sign language, “A love movie?”
Ling Luochuan didn’t understand, and she remembered that he couldn’t read many signs. So she wrote it down on a piece of paper again.
The man smiled after reading it and said, ‘It’s a revenge movie.’
Wei Xi shook her head and wrote on the paper, ‘It’s a pity, I thought it would be a very good love story. It’s already late, if there’s nothing else, I’ll go up.’
Ling Luochuan nodded, and Wei Xi picked up her book and backpack, about to open the car door…
‘Wei Xi…’ Ling Luochuan suddenly called out to her.
Wei Xi looked back and gestured with one hand, ‘Is there anything else?’
‘You just said that you were betting on my conscience. If I don’t have one at all, aren’t you afraid that you’ll lose everything?‘
Wei Xi looked at him in surprise, shook her head, and wrote, “I didn’t think about it that much. I just feel that if you wanted to do something, you would have done it a long time ago, and you wouldn’t have waited until today.”
’Haha…’ The man looked at the neon lights in the distance and smiled, ’I just realized today that a pure heart is the most terrifying weapon in the world.’
He turned his face and looked at her with a complex and tangled look in his eyes. ‘It’s strange, at some point, I actually hoped that you were my nemesis, that everything you said to me was a lie. I even hoped that you were a woman with ulterior motives, full of hatred. Everything you did was to use me to take revenge on him. If that was the case, I could have been a little easier, and I could have let go and done whatever I wanted to you. Unfortunately, you’re not. Cute girl, you didn’t even leave me half a plausible reason…’
He reached out as if to stroke her beautiful profile in the light. She didn’t move, but the hand stopped in mid-air. He smiled, ‘I will keep my promise to you, find my lost conscience, and be a humble gentleman. So you don’t have to worry about losing everything.’
Wei Xi looked at him and wrote, ‘There are not just two paths in this world.’
Ling Luochuan didn’t understand what she meant, ‘What do you mean?’
‘In a few days, it will be the Mid-Autumn Festival. I miss the lotus pond in the old town and the spicy hotpot at that Sichuan restaurant. If you have time on the night of the Mid-Autumn Festival, maybe we can go back together and take a look?‘
Ling Luochuan looked at the note, then at Wei Xi, then turned his face to look at the busy street market ahead, then lowered his head again before smiling. “Are you inviting me?”
’You can use your imagination all you like, but I’ll just take it as a way of thanking you for looking after me these past few days.’
Wei Xi suddenly remembered something and opened her backpack to give him a leave form. She then wrote, ‘This year’s Mid-Autumn Festival and National Day long holidays are very scattered. I drew this leave form myself and gave you one as a gift in return for your help.’
Ling Luochuan looked down and saw that the whole paper was full of pictures of Grey Wolf. The rest days were drawn as silly smiling faces, while the days he had to work were drawn as him being beaten up.
This was the first time Wei Xi had invited him and given him a gift. For Ling Luochuan, it was like heaven on earth, the greatest joy in the world. He looked calm, but his heart was dancing for joy.
Wei Xi saw him just smiling to himself, so she wrote on the paper, ‘If you’re done, I really need to go up.’
But the man grabbed her hands, ‘Wei Xi, tell me, what is the third way? If you don’t explain clearly, I’m afraid I won’t be able to sleep.’
Wei Xi looked at her hands, and Ling Luochuan immediately let go. Wei Xi wrote four characters on a piece of paper, tore it off, and placed it in his hands.
He looked down and saw that the four characters were none other than ‘a way out of the willows’.
A way out of the willows, a way out of the willows… Ling Luochuan repeated these words over and over again, then his mouth slowly lifted up into a big smile, so happy that he could not describe it.
These four words were really, really important to him. It was as if he could see the goddess of dawn beckoning to him, the mountains and rivers clear and bright, the sun shining down, and all the tigers in the world turning into butter.
Wei Xi saw the man beside her squeezing the note and smiling endlessly. So quietly, she took her things, opened the car door and slipped away.
But before she had gone half a metre, she heard someone behind her shouting, ‘Wei Xi…’
She turned around subconsciously, and before she could understand what was going on, she was pulled by a strong pair of arms and crashed into his warm embrace.
The bustling world instantly went dark, and all the light disappeared. She stood there with her hands hanging down, her backpack falling off her shoulders and the books in her hands scattering on the ground. In his arms, she had seen almost half her life’s scenery.
What was there in the past, what was there in the future, the pain, the suffering, the scars, the bloodshed… Then, everything gradually became blurry, and slowly became clear again. Eventually, it was like the petals of flowers flying in the wind, drifting away with the wind and never to return.
Seeing the surprised look on the passer-by’s face, the person in his arms struggled a little, and Ling Luochuan reluctantly let go of her hand, bending down to pick up her backpack and books.
‘Shall I walk you up?’
Wei Xi shook her head, took back her things, and turned to go upstairs. They were almost at the entrance, and he was still shouting behind her, ‘Hey, beautiful girl, if you don’t let me walk you up, watch out for perverts.’
Wei Xi turned around and gestured, ‘Aren’t you the biggest pervert?’
Ling Luochuan leaned against the car door, smiling and shaking his head, ‘I can’t read it, but I know you’re cursing me.’
Wei Xi smiled and bowed her head, then looked up at him with watery eyes and made a gesture of a phone call, ‘Let’s get in touch by phone.’
Ling Luochuan watched her go up the stairs, smiled for a while at the top of the stairs, and then smiled for a while at the street lamp, oblivious to the surprised looks of the passers-by. Then he turned around with style, returned to the car, saw the note, picked it up and read it again.
He looked at it and smiled, then looked at it again and smiled. He found the handwriting really beautiful. He looked up at the night sky in the slums and thought that the moonlight was really lovely today and the night sky was really beautiful.
His phone rang. Ling Luochuan thought it was Weixi calling, so he pressed the earpiece and heard the voice of his secretary. He couldn’t help smiling again and said in a voice that was many times gentler than usual, ‘What is it?’
The person on the other end of the line was a little surprised and paused for half a second before saying, ‘Mr Ling, Mr Lu’s secretary said that since the Weather Forecast said there would be a typhoon making landfall in the near future, they are afraid of being stranded here for too long and would like to talk to you about the cooperation plan tonight. I have already told them that you don’t discuss business after 8 o’clock, but they kept asking, so…’
“That’s fine, let’s talk then. The Mid-Autumn Festival is just a few days away, we can’t let people not be able to go home during the holiday.’
The secretary was surprised again, a little doubtful whether this person was her boss, ‘If you have no problem with it, I will inform them. Besides, I heard from them just now that they seem to want us to give up another 5%. I have already rejected it according to your instructions…’
‘It’s only 5%, let’s give it up, it’s okay,’ Ling Luochuan was talking on the phone while pasting the leave form that Wei Xi had given him in the most conspicuous place in the car. The more he looked at it, the cuter it became.
The secretary was a little suspicious that she had not made herself clear, so she repeated herself, ‘Mr Ling, they are asking us to give up another five percentage points, which is equivalent to several million in lost revenue. Do we really have to give it up?’
‘A few million is nothing. It’s not a big deal. It’s not easy for small companies, and besides, it’s the holiday season, so let’s make everyone happy.’
The secretary almost suspected that he had been possessed. After working with him for so many years, she had always known that Ling Luochuan was the most cunning in the business world, and she had never seen him be so humane.
‘Okay, that’s settled. You tell them to wait for me at the hotel, I’ll be there right away.”
The secretary put the phone down, double-checked the number, and was sure she hadn’t dialed the wrong number.
Ling Luochuan turned on the radio and tuned into the music channel. He started the engine neatly and the car sped through the city under the neon lights.
A melodious English song was playing on the radio, Only One by Alex Band. Ling Luochuan rolled down the window to let in the cool night breeze. It was as if he could see the stars in the sky, dancing to the melody.
One love to give
One chance to keep from falling
One heart to break
One soul to take us
Not to forsake us
Only One
Only One
“Friends, this week’s theme song is the hit American TV series “The Vampire Diaries” episode “Only One”. Following the box office success of the “Twilight” film series, vampire and human romance-themed films and TV series are all the rage in the US and are extremely popular with young people. Perhaps we can understand this phenomenon as a desire for true love that transcends the value placed on life. When love is at its most intense, life is also at its most dangerous. Friends, when the person you love is standing in front of you, what will you choose between desire and destruction, and between protecting and guarding? Or will you say that there is no need to choose, and that you will leave everything to fate, because true love is like blood…”
Ling Luochuan shook his head and laughed lightly, suddenly realising that he was getting old and was no longer used to young people’s stuff. He savoured the lyrics again, and suddenly realised that they fit his own mood at the moment so well.
One life, one destiny, one life, one gift, one fall, one heartbreak, one soul, it captures you and me, never to be parted, this is the only one…
He turned his face and looked at the blurry lights of the city. He longed for true love like blood, but at this moment, the emotions surging out of his heart were not of possession and desire, but of hope and endless thoughts.
Chapter 44 Rape
If it weren’t for another night shift, after taking a shower, Weixi lit the balcony lamp, set up the drawing board, and prepared to finish the unfinished work. While she was busy, her phone rang. She thought it was Ling Luochuan calling, so she picked up the phone without looking at the caller ID.
‘It’s me…’
The paint box in her hand fell to the ground, and the colorful paints spilled all over the floor.
The voice continued, ‘I’ll wait for you in the car. In ten minutes, come down, or I’ll come up there.’
All that could be heard was a busy signal. Wei-xi remained in the same position, holding the phone, as if she could not see anything, her vision was horribly white. I don’t know how long it was, maybe ten minutes, maybe a century, footsteps could be heard at the door, followed by a knock.
Wei-xi turned her head in panic, looking at the door with fear, her whole body shaking uncontrollably. She didn’t want to see him! She didn’t want to see him at all! But the terrible sound of the knocking was like a ghost demanding his life, relentless.
Knock, knock, knock, each blow felt like it was hammering on her heart, shattering her liver and gallbladder. She desperately covered her ears, just wanting to hide herself away from this horror, to get as far away as possible. In her panic, she tripped over a chair and fell to the floor, scraping her arms and knees.
Ignoring the cuts and pain, she hugged her knees and, like a frightened little mole, she cowered in the corner, trembling and shaking all over.
The knocking finally stopped, and Wei Xi slowly raised her head from between her knees. The phone that had fallen to the ground started ringing.
A voice said outside the door, ‘Wei Xi, I know you’re in there. Open the door, or I’ll find someone to invite Miss Mo back. You don’t want to disturb her, do you?’
She looked startled, with frightened, vacant eyes, helplessly looking at the door. She was at her wits’ end…
Ruan Shaonan stood in the doorway, taking in the whole room with a single glance.
There was barely ten square metres of space, and apart from the bathroom, there was only one room. A double bed, a chair, and that was all the furniture in the room. It was very clean, except for the peeling roof tiles, which had been damaged by moisture. It was so basic that it was not even comparable to the cheapest of cheap motel rooms.
He also found a folded-up spring bed in the corner, and a wire for hanging curtains hanging in the middle of the room. So it can be guessed how the two women and one man arranged their living quarters in this space where there is barely enough room to stand.
‘Apart from cutting your hair short and the scar on your neck, it seems like you haven’t changed much,’ said Ruan Shaonan, sitting in a chair and looking up and down at Weixi, who was huddled in the corner of the bed. He added, ‘I almost forgot, you can’t speak.’
Wei Xi listened to him speak, each sentence reverberating, as if it were close, but also seemed very far away. However, after not seeing each other for half a year, the two people who had once rubbed their ears together were as if they were worlds apart.
She hugged her knees and her whole body shrunk into a ball.
‘How come you’re living with Chi Mo?’ Ruan Shaonan asked.
Wei Xi looked at him blankly, and it took her a while to react. She took out a pen and wrote in her notebook: ‘I was hospitalised and spent all our savings. The landlord threw out all our things. We had nowhere to go, so we borrowed money from loan sharks, and he let us live here.’
Ruan Shaonan remembered that Mo Ruifei had come to see him a few times six months ago. So that was what had happened.
Wei Xi continued to write, ‘What do you want with me?’
Ruan Shaonan smiled, ‘I told you, I miss you.’
Wei Xi couldn’t help but tremble as she thought back to the past. With trembling fingers, she tried to write, ‘Mr Ruan, please get to the point.’
Ruan Shaonan smiled, his lips curling up, his smile as pale as if it didn’t exist. Wei Xi’s heart followed that cold smile and curled up into a small ball.
‘Fine, I don’t like beating around the bush either. I just want to tell you not to try to use one man against another, especially an innocent little girl like you. This kind of self-righteous behaviour is almost laughably stupid.‘
Wei Xi looked at him and wrote, “You think I’m with him to get back at you?”
’Get back at me?’ Ruan Shaonan smiled at the corner of his mouth, ’I know exactly how much of a temper Luo Chuan has, and if it comes to being ruthless and cunning, I have to give him three points. You don’t have the skills to play tricks on him. I’m just worried about you, that you’ll lose your head when you see how he treats you now. Killing is a wolf’s nature. Have you ever seen a wolf that doesn’t eat meat?”
He deliberately slowed down his speech and said meaningfully, ’It’s really not easy for you to be able to keep this life and continue your studies. If I were you, I would cherish it.’
Ruan Shaonan looked at his watch and then surveyed the room again. He said lightly, ‘That’s enough for today. If you need money, you can come to me. In fact, I really miss the old days when we were together. I’ve kept your asthma medicine.’
He stood up, leaned over, touched her cold side, and laughed, ‘I mean, you know what I mean.’
Wei Xi looked at him with watery eyes, staring straight at him. It was as if she were looking at a stranger she didn’t know.
At that moment, what welled up in her heart was not fear, but sadness. She felt sad for her once-devoted heart; for the young Ruan Shaonan; and for their memories that had passed away and that she had once cherished like her life…
Did he love her? Did he regret it?
The answer was no, he didn’t.
If there had been even the slightest trace of love or remorse, he would not have appeared before her in such a manner, with such a posture and expression. There was no guilt, no shame, no hesitation, no apology. There was only the victor’s ridicule and indifference towards the loser, the strong’s contempt and arrogance towards the weak.
Over the past six months, she had been asking herself what she had done wrong and why he had treated her like this. Wasn’t it said that you should put yourself in someone else’s shoes? Why did he not love her despite all her efforts?
Now, seeing him like this and hearing these words, she finally had an answer to the question that had been nagging at her.
This man, the most selfish man in the world, was hollow inside. Apart from a beautiful shell, he had nothing.
Wei Xi gazed into the man’s unfathomable eyes, her lips moving as she spoke the words silently: ‘I love you. You are the only one who shines in my eyes. If I don’t love you, you are nothing.’
Ruan Shaonan didn’t understand, but he was captivated by those eyes that were like a deep pool. He cupped her side of her face and lowered his head to kiss her. Wei Xi snapped back to reality and bit him hard on the lips.
This bite was extremely fierce, but the man not only didn’t let go, but instead grabbed her neck and slammed her against the cold wall.
Wei Xi’s back of the head hit the wall, and the pain from the impact was bone-shattering. Her vision first turned red and white, and then finally turned into a dark, endless black wasteland.
The faint seemed to last only an instant. Wei Xi opened her eyes again and saw the mould on the ceiling, the swaying hanging lamp, and the darkness in the room. A cold, foreboding atmosphere spread around, as if it were a scene from a horror movie.
She thought that Ruan Shaonan had already left, but when she turned her face sideways, she realised that he hadn’t. He was standing by the bed. She couldn’t see his face clearly in the darkness, but she could vaguely see him casually unbuttoning his shirt and revealing his firm muscles.
Soldier! With a sound of a snap, he pulled out his belt and threw it aside. The way he undressed was so cold and ruthless, so aloof, that she was terrified and her insides were in pieces.
She knew what he was going to do, and she knew how he was going to do it. He would tear her apart with his cold, sharp teeth. Even if she bled and cried, even if she begged for mercy, he would just keep on taking, without a shred of compassion.
The impending disaster terrified her to the extreme. Ignoring her aching body, she braced her arms and rolled off the bed, terrified. The door was just half a metre away, if only she could crawl out…
He laughed, like an experienced hunter who had pulled the prey’s ankle and dragged her back. Wei Xi felt like a cat being dragged towards the chopping board, her ten fingers digging into the floor as if they were clutching onto her life. The brittle fingernails made a harsh, metallic sound as they scraped against the floor, and half of the nail on her little finger had been split off, leaving a thin line of blood.
He grabbed her arm, roughly pulled her up, pushed her onto the bed, his cold eyes full of ridicule, neatly undid his trousers and jumped on top of her.
Wei Xi, like a mouse being electrocuted, struggled like crazy, pounding his shoulders with her hands and kicking wildly with her legs. In the chaos, she actually kicked the man in the stomach.
Ruan Shaonan winced in pain, turned around and slapped her mercilessly in the face. Wei Xi’s back head hit the bedboard, her vision went dark, and the man’s strong body weighed down on her again.
Her left cheek was swollen, painful and hot. Ignoring the pain in her body, she struggled with all her strength, resisting. Her eyes were fixed on the door, and her broken voice issued a woeful cry for help, so faint and broken that it was barely audible, miserable and desperate.
Ruan Shaonan was annoyed by her, so he pulled the belt and grabbed her chin with one hand, leaning in her ear and sneering, ‘If you don’t behave, I don’t mind tying you up again!’
A feeling of terror ran through her body, and she remembered that terrible night. She was terrified and shaking. She looked at his dark eyes in despair, and her miserable tears fell like broken strings, one by one, cracking in the cold air.
Seeing the retreat and weakness in her eyes, the man licked her earlobe and smiled, ‘Wei-xi, be a good girl, you still want to continue going to school, don’t you? Don’t make me tear you apart!’
His cold breath pierced her eardrum, and she couldn’t bear it anymore. It seemed that she really conceded, closing her tear-dimmed eyes. Her trembling hands slid down his shoulders, and her fingertips accidentally touched the red spot on his chest, causing the man to tremble.
He let out a low groan, tore her nightdress, and cupped her side of her face with his large hand, kissing her fiercely. The line on her neck was still so soft and quiet, and her slightly trembling breasts were like a shy invitation. He bit her pink nipples, nibbling on her perfect flesh, and his long, slender fingers ravaged her thighs with great strength, like a hungry ghost from hell, facing a beautiful feast.
His breath was hot, his nostrils flared, and his heavy breathing showed how much he was enjoying himself. The person beneath him, meanwhile, was clutching the threadbare pillowcase with her slender fingers, as if she were enduring great pain, like a fearful patient facing the surgeon’s scalpel, a drowning person clutching at the last straw.
He held her waist with satisfaction, parted her thin white legs, buried his strong waist between her legs, and the desire beneath him was like a fierce beast, burning with lust. He hated the fresh flesh in front of him, the body of his enemy’s daughter, with a slight weakness and a sad beauty.
He doesn’t love her! He told himself countless times. But he didn’t understand why he just couldn’t help himself with her, and even resorted to such dirty tricks to possess her. No! He simply wanted to tear her apart, when she smiled at another man, when she quietly hid in his arms and looked up at the stars.
He heard the voice in his heart: ‘Go to hell! Go to hell!’
He grabbed her hair and ripped her underwear with a hiss, the shredded cloth hanging pitifully on her bruised and marked thighs.
Her eyes welled up with tears, and as he tightened his grip, she was forced to look up at him with tears in her eyes. This was the way he liked it. He wanted her to look at him, to possess her every second, and he wanted her to watch. No ignoring! No escaping!
But at that moment, she was so docile and quiet, so gentle that it almost drowned him. He looked at her watery eyes, so clear and beautiful.
His fingers caressed her tenderly, soothing her gently, and with that primal rhythm, he forcibly took her. It seemed that in this way, he wanted to make her as devoted, as happy, and as passionate as he was. At the moment of impending invasion, he kissed her on the lips and declared imperiously in a crazed voice, ‘You are mine, Weixi, you are mine…’
Wei Xi looked at the ceiling in the darkness, listening quietly. She endured this cruel process in silence, as if she had been waiting for this moment.
Just for this moment!
With her free hand, she reached under the pillow, where Mo Qi had left her and Ru Fei’s daggers for self-defence. She felt the sharp blade, then the rubber-coated handle. With a sense of honesty, she took it in her hand, drew it out, and thrust it towards his neck…
Boom! There was a loud noise outside the window. The silver-white lightning seemed like a sharp sword piercing the night sky. The heavy rain poured down, and the people on the street were caught off guard and ran in all directions.
The murder weapon in her hand fell to the ground with a crash, followed by the sound of bones snapping. Xu Xi bowed her body and gasped for breath. The pain and sweat blurred her vision instantly. Her eyes looked straight and hollowly at the man’s furious eyes. The whole world was deathly silent.
Ruan Shaonan looked at the woman in his hands with bloodshot eyes, unable to believe his eyes. She had once loved him so dearly and humbly. But now, the hand that stabbed at his neck carried a ruthless determination to destroy them both, without mercy.
He couldn’t believe it. What kind of person was she? Her body was weak and vulnerable, and any strong man could take advantage of her as they pleased. But the spirit hidden within her body was stubborn to the point of being chilling.
He twisted her trembling hand and, like a wounded beast, leaned in to her ear and sneered coldly, ‘You like this, don’t you? Then tonight, let’s have a good time.’
‘No…’ The person beneath him trembled, lips quivering, emitting a silent scream from broken vocal cords, the miserable intensity seeming to shake the night. But soon, the sound of howling rain and the rumble of thunder drowned everything out, leaving nothing…
Chapter 45: Morning Shadows
Ling Luochuan was woken by his alarm clock. He opened his eyes and saw it was already 8am. After finishing business last night, he had a few more drinks with the Taiwanese. At the moment, his head felt like it was stuffed with lead and it hurt badly.
The rain outside the window had been falling since midnight and had not stopped. He rubbed his temples, sat up and lifted the quilt…
‘Weixi?”
Ling Luochuan was really taken aback when he saw the person who looked like a little shrimp huddled under his quilt. “When did you get here?”
He lifted her face and looked at it. She was sleeping soundly, her hair and clothes were still wet, obviously from the rain. Then he saw her cheeks were flushed, and when he touched her forehead, she had a slight fever. He lifted her arm again and noticed a bruise on her elbow. He couldn’t help but sigh.
Ling Luochuan was used to sleeping naked, but now he was lying naked in his own home. This little girl had climbed into his bed while he was asleep, so who had taken advantage of whom?
He found a pair of black pajama pants and put them on casually. He got out of bed, found the medicine cabinet, and took out a band-aid for external wounds and some fever medicine. When he was giving her medicine, he noticed that her clothes were still wet, and she would get sick if she kept wearing them.
So he said to the person in his arms, ‘It’s not that I want to take advantage of you, but since you fell unconscious and got soaked like a drowned rat, you’ll have to put up with it.’
He helped her take off her clothes, starting with her skirt and then her underwear…
Ling Luochuan felt that his hands were not obeying him, and his eyes were becoming increasingly disobedient. He had only heard about ‘water of autumn as skin, jade as bone’ before, but now he really felt it. This girl looked as if she had been made from a snowdrift, incredibly fair and pure.
After her wet clothes had been stripped off, she shivered and instinctively pressed herself against the warmth. When he had finished, she was like a naked kitten, curled up in his arms.
Ling Luochuan groaned in frustration. This was like a sweet trap. He simply made up his mind, rolled over, and pinned the person under him. He thought to himself, ‘Who cares who you love? Just be comfortable first. At most, I’ll apologize afterwards and take whatever punishment I get.’
Ling Luochuan shook his head and laughed lightly. He didn’t consider himself a kind-hearted person, and he had done many evil deeds in the business world, such as fanning the flames, betraying friends, kicking someone when they were down, bullying men and dominating women.
But at the moment, he looked at the person in his arms and saw that she was sleeping so peacefully, so sweetly, so contentedly. She had come to find him in the rain, despite her injuries, and perhaps she had encountered some difficulty.
And when he saw the scar on her neck, he remembered that when she was being tortured to death by Lu Renxi, he was laughing and joking with Ruan Shaonan, celebrating their success and drinking heartily.
When he thought about this, he couldn’t do anything.
Feeling the scar, he muttered to himself in confusion, ‘How could he bear to do that, to abandon you to that animal?’ He lowered his head and kissed her forehead gently, saying with a heartache, ‘How could I bear it? Why didn’t I save you?’
He got up and went to the bathroom to get a dry towel to help her dry her hair and body. When he calmed down, he noticed that there were multiple bruises and abrasions on her legs, even on her thighs. The little finger of her right hand had lost a nail, exposing pink flesh.
He couldn’t help but wonder, did she roll down the stairs? How did she get these injuries? If she accidentally fell down the stairs, then why wasn’t there any injury on her forehead?
At this moment, his phone rang. He was afraid of waking her up, so he answered it immediately.
His secretary said, ‘Mr. Ling, the meeting will start in half an hour…’
Ling Luochuan froze for a moment, and then remembered that he still had a lot of work to do today. He turned his head and looked at the person in bed, and said, ‘I need to take the day off today. Tell them to reschedule.’
‘Reschedule?’ The secretary repeated in surprise, then obediently said, “Okay, I’ll let them know.”
Ling Luochuan hung up the phone, returned to the bed, and tucked the quilt for Wei Xi. He rubbed his temples, but his headache was still severe. He found a painkiller in the medicine cabinet, took it, and then lay back on the bed, trying to catch some sleep.
Ling Luochuan likes silk bedding, as it is soft and comfortable, but also feels slightly cool to the touch. Wei Xi already had a low-grade fever and was cold, so now, covered in this, she felt even more chilled to the bone. So instinctively, she pressed herself against the only warm thing in the quilt – the man’s chest – again and again…
Seeing this scene, Ling Luochuan couldn’t help but laugh and cry. He lowered his head and held her cold little hand, sighing, ‘You really put me to the test…’ Then he lifted her chin and grinned wickedly, ‘No matter what, a kiss is always possible, right? Anyway, you’re so quiet right now, like an inflatable doll, I wouldn’t know if I swallowed you.’
But in the end, he didn’t do it, but instead leaned over and embraced her, yawned, and fell asleep.
The two of them slept in the bedroom with the curtains closed until dusk. Without warning, she suddenly had a nightmare. She was overcome by this terrible nightmare, unable to move as if she was being weighed down by a ghost. She wanted to scream but couldn’t, she wanted to cry but couldn’t, she wanted to wake up but couldn’t open her eyes no matter what she did. She was breathing rapidly and sweating profusely.
For some reason, she suddenly sat up, her eyes wide with fear as she stared ahead, gasping for breath. She was awake, but her mind was still in the dream.
Ling Luochuan, who had been sleeping next to her, also woke up as a result of the commotion. He looked at the alarm clock on the bedside table, shirtless, and said, ‘Damn, why did I sleep until now?’
Then he saw the person next to him, who had been stripped naked by him, clutching the quilt, her watery eyes looking at him in confusion. He couldn’t help but want to bully her.
So he lifted up her slender, delicate fingers, kissed them, and said very gentlemanly, ‘Baby, do you think we should eat first or take a shower first? I think we should take a shower first, we sweated so much last night…’
Wei Xi pulled her hand back like she had been electrocuted, grabbed the quilt, and retreated to the corner of the bed, curling up into a snowball and shivering.
Ling Luochuan didn’t expect her to be so scared. He raised his hands and laughed, ‘I’m joking. I haven’t done anything since last night. You should be able to feel it, right?’
But the person curled up in the corner of the bed didn’t seem to hear what he said. She just kept huddling up like a poor little hedgehog, except without the quills.
Ling Luochuan felt something was wrong. He forcefully pulled the person and the quilt over to him, grabbed her shoulders, and nervously asked, ‘Little ancestor, don’t scare me. You didn’t forget again, did you? What about last night? What about the words you wrote for me? You can’t possibly not remember them all?”
The man felt like he was going crazy. If she really said she didn’t remember, not only would he be left disappointed, but he would also have to reset all his previous efforts and start again from scratch.
Wei Xi was held up by him the whole time, looking at him timidly like a little rabbit. She looked around for a while, as if she was looking for something.
Ling Luochuan immediately understood and brought her paper and pen. Wei Xi wrote on the paper: ‘I remember everything I wrote to you last night. I know you didn’t do anything, I came here on my own, I’m sorry for causing you trouble.’
Ling Luochuan let out a sigh of relief, ‘What do you mean sorry, I was hoping you would come. But why did you come so late in the rain? Do you remember how you got those injuries?’
Wei Xi shivered as if she was afraid of the cold, hugged her arms, looked straight at her legs, her expression dull and her mind in a daze.
‘Wei Xi?’ Ling Luochuan looked at her worriedly. Her reaction today was so unusual, it didn’t seem like amnesia, but rather like she had been extremely frightened. She was dazed and stupid, and the aura she had had in the past was gone completely.
‘I don’t remember…’ Wei Xi made a gesture like this and then stopped moving.
Ling Luochuan looked at her. She was lying, and he could tell at a glance. But he couldn’t expose her. The fact that she was keeping something from him, that she didn’t trust him completely, made him feel a little sad.
Looking at Wei Xi’s distant expression, Ling Luochuan couldn’t figure it out. Yesterday, he definitely felt that she was getting closer, but after just one night, she had run away again.
Wei Xi looked at the clothes he had thrown on the floor and wrote on a piece of paper, ‘You took them off for me?’
He raised his eyebrows at her and said, ‘Is there another person in this house?’
Wei Xi hung her head, looking like a little girl who had been bullied and had nowhere to turn to for help. She hugged her knees and didn’t say another word in defence.
Seeing her resigned expression, the man lost his mood for joking. He got up, got out of bed and opened the curtains.
His bedroom is designed with a view of the water. Outside the window is an artificial lake as flat as a mirror. As the sun sets, the clear lake water reflects the sunset, as if it were a burning sea.
Suddenly, he feels that today’s dusk is especially beautiful. The reddish shadows are like a veil, the distant mountains are like a dark green, and the red colour is everywhere in the sky and the earth, making people feel broad-minded.
He opened the window and stood by the window looking at the distant lake. Wei Xi looked up and saw him in the setting sun, and saw the tattoo of flowers that stretched from his left shoulder to the back of his body. For a moment, she forgot her fear.
She never would have guessed that Ling Luochuan, a nobleman, would have a tattoo. She couldn’t see it before because he was wearing clothes, but now, as she looked at it in the setting sun, the red flowers on his shoulder looked even more enchanting. The black vines looked like the tentacles of a demon, wrapping tightly around her eyes and her heart.
This unbelievable pattern combined so perfectly with his powerful masculine body and natural air of nobility that it seemed like a totem exclusive to him.
She didn’t know how to describe the scene before her eyes. All the words seemed too shallow to describe it, and no matter how good the praise was, it was just forced.
Ling Luochuan looked back in the backlight and saw her sitting there still wrapped in the quilt. Thinking that she was still naked under the quilt, he couldn’t help but ask, ‘Are you cold?’
Wei Xi shook her head and then sneezed. Ling Luochuan closed the window, went to the cloakroom and found a light grey sweater, returned to the bedroom and handed it to her, saying, ‘Wear this for now. Your clothes have been wet in the rain and need washing before you can wear them.’
Wei Xi took the clothes and, unable to resist her curiosity, wrote on a piece of paper, ‘How come you have a tattoo?’
Ling Luochuan then remembered and pointed to his shoulder, ‘You mean this? Did you get it when you were at military school?’
Wei Xi was a little surprised and wrote, ‘Did you get it when you were at military school?’
Ling Luochuan laughed, ‘I got it because I wasn’t allowed to, and then I was successfully kicked out. When our master found out, he broke one of my ribs, right here…’
He took her hand and pressed it against his well-defined abs. The rigid, raw touch felt like an iron plate wrapped in cotton cloth.
Wei Xi flushed, quickly withdrew her hand, and wrote on the paper, ‘You did it on purpose to make him angry?’
The man laughed and pinched her chin, ‘As long as it makes him jump, I’m willing to die. Okay, let’s not talk about this. Are you hungry, let’s order some food?’
But Wei Xi’s mind was still on his tattoos. Looking at the enchanting and gorgeous patterns, her lips moved, silently mumbling two words.
Ling Luochuan saw her lips moving and asked curiously, ‘What did you say?’
‘Zhao Ying, the name of this flower, is the most beautiful variety of dahlia,’ Wei Xi wrote on the paper.
Ling Luochuan looked down and nodded, ‘I didn’t know it had such a pedigree. I just randomly picked a pattern and asked the master to embroider it. Do you like it?’
Wei Xi nodded and said in sign language, ‘It’s very beautiful.’ After thinking for a moment, she wrote on the paper again, ‘Can I draw you? I want to use this as my graduation work, it won’t take up too much of your time, is that okay?‘
Ling Luochuan was immediately interested, and asked her with a smile, “Fully nude? As long as it’s you, I’ll do it unconditionally.”
’No need to be fully nude, just the upper body will do.”
Ling Luochuan gave a wicked smile, “Are you sure? In fact, I have more to show than the top.”
Wei Xi shook her head and wrote, ’I’ll only draw flowers, I’m not interested in worms.’
Chapter 46: The nature of wolves
“You resist me like this, yet you go with him. What kind of person do you think he is? Let me tell you, there is no reason for Ling Luochuan to leave something he likes alone. Once he gets it, how long do you think he can keep it fresh? A month? A year? You have no status, no position, no money, no background, and you are in love with a playboy. Can you afford to play around?’
‘You are doomed to never escape this life. I am your best choice. I don’t need you to love me, and I won’t love you. But I can give you a much better life than you have now. Life is short, and living it to the fullest is what matters. If you don’t want to, I’ll let you off the hook today. Think about it…’
The paintbrush in his hand stopped without him realising it. Wei-xi looked at her drawing board in disbelief. Only a few strokes had been added.
At that moment, Ruan Shaonan twisted her wrist, pinched her chin and finished speaking. Then he left her, who was trembling with pain, got dressed and left. She was alone in the cold bed, terrified and crying uncontrollably in the dark room.
She didn’t want Ruifei to see her like this. After getting dressed, she didn’t know where to go.
She was alone on the dark and cold street in the pouring rain, walking for a long time, shivering with cold, sleepy and tired.
She only remembered that she finally walked to a very warm place, very clean, and it wasn’t raining. She was so tired that she found a soft cushion and fell asleep on it.
She thought to herself, ‘The nights in this city are so long. I hope it’s sunny tomorrow…’
When she woke up, it was sunny. Seeing the sleeping person next to her, she remembered that she had unknowingly walked to Ling Luochuan’s villa, used the key he gave her to open the door, and stumbled into someone else’s bed, where she slept until dawn.
‘Are you too tired? Do you need to rest?’ Ling Luochuan, who was sitting in a chair posing as a model, looked at her, who was sometimes in a daze and sometimes staring at the drawing board, and thought that she hadn’t rested well yesterday.
Weixi didn’t reply, kept her head down, her hands hanging down, sitting on the tall drawing chair, looking even more miserable with her shoulders hunched and her back arched.
He walked over to her and lifted her chin, ’Don’t keep your head down, it’s easy to get wrinkles on your neck.’
Wei Xi subconsciously touched her neck, and he laughed and said, ‘It’s not that fast yet. If you’re scared, just hold your head up more. I like seeing you hold your head up. The first time I saw you, you were like that, like a deer listening in the wind, and you mesmerised me and I couldn’t take my eyes off you.’
Ling Luochuan thought back to the first time they met. This silly kid, she was obviously weak and vulnerable, but she liked to get in the way.
‘The first time we met? You mean the time you pushed me onto the sofa and bullied me at ‘The Most Beautiful City in the World’?’ Wei Xi took out her notebook and wrote on the paper.
Ling Luochuan gritted his teeth in anger, ’Damn girl, didn’t I already apologise to you? Why are you still holding a grudge? How about this, there’s a sofa here, you push me up on it too, bully me like I bullied you, and we’ll call it even, okay?’
He said and then he wanted to pull her onto the sofa. Wei Xi knew that he was trying to cheer her up, but she really couldn’t smile.
She withdrew her hand and pulled the corners of her mouth, as if she had smiled.
Seeing her gloomy expression, Ling Luochuan frowned and leaned down to look her in the eyes and asked, ‘Did he bully you?’
A flash of fear crossed Wei Xi’s eyes. Ling Luochuan gritted his teeth and said, ‘I knew it. How could that underground fighter know how to be considerate? I’ll take revenge for you.’
Wei Xi couldn’t help but laugh. She took out a notebook and wrote, ‘Don’t make excuses to cause trouble for others. It’s not what you think between us. He’s a very good person. He didn’t bully me. I owe him too much.’
Ling Luochuan shrugged, fiddled with Wei Xi’s easel, and said disdainfully, ‘Yes, he made a good man of him. He deserves to be immortalised on a tablet and we bad people should all go to hell.’
Wei Xi noticed that whenever they talked about Chi Mo, Ling Luochuan would become like a cat with its fur bristling, full of hostility.
“I didn’t say you were a bad person, so what’s the rush? You’re sweating like a pig, your veins are popping out.‘ After writing this, Wei Xi took out a handkerchief and handed it to him to wipe the sweat.
’Who said I was a hypocrite in the first place? I remember.”
Ling Luochuan didn’t take it, but instead brought his handsome face close to him and said cheekily, ’My hands aren’t clean, don’t get them dirty, wipe them for me.’
Wei Xi ignored him and slipped the handkerchief into his hands before writing on the paper: ‘Weren’t we arguing at the time? Of course we said unkind things when we were arguing, and I’ve forgotten what you said at the time. How come you remember it so clearly?’
Ling Luochuan felt happy and warm in his heart after reading it. There were so many meanings to this sentence. Firstly, the things she said to him at the time were not sincere. Secondly, she had not held a grudge. Thirdly, she had not treated him as an outsider, but as a child who was just having a fight.
He wiped the sweat from his face with his fresh handkerchief, then sidled up behind her and whispered in her ear, ‘It’s easy to forget this, but I’ll never forget the worm story…’ He suddenly kissed her on the cheek, then threatened her after the fact, ‘Don’t you dare wipe it off! If you do, your graduation project will be gone, and you’ve only just started.’
Wei Xi lowered her head and thought for a moment, then wrote, ‘In that case, I won’t wipe it off. I’ll just pretend it was a little bite from a puppy.’
Ling Luochuan laughed instead of getting angry. ‘Then you might as well let me bite as much as I like.’
He put his arms around her waist, and Wei Xi, scared, tried to dodge to the side, but she lost her footing and fell off the chair. In the confusion, Ling Luochuan couldn’t hold her back, and he was instead carried away by the momentum and fell over.
Then, the easel, the drawing board, the water glass, the paint tray… everything that could fall over did, and the mess on the carpet was a sight to behold.
Ling Luochuan didn’t care about the paint that had stained him, he pulled Wei Xi up from the mess and anxiously asked, ‘Are you hurt?’
Wei Xi shook her head and looked back. She was sorry to have ruined a good carpet, but then she turned her face to look at the colourful man, almost fell to the ground, and almost laughed until she passed out.
‘If you still have the energy to laugh like that, then you’re fine.’ Ling Luochuan picked her up and put her on the sofa. ‘You fell pretty hard just now. If you feel any pain anywhere, let’s go to the hospital right away, don’t hold it in.’
Wei Xi told him in sign language, ‘I’m really fine.’
Seeing the red paint on the tip of his nose, it looked like a red-nosed reindeer, which was really funny. So she tilted her little head, smiled, and held out her hand to help him wipe it off.
Ling Luochuan grabbed her hand and gazed at her with burning eyes. She was still wearing his sweater, and it still smelled of him. The baggy men’s sweater covered her slender and delicate body. Did she not know that in this state, she was a great temptation to him?
The man grabbed her by the neck, held her chin up with his thumb, and couldn’t wait to kiss her, like a wolf that was extremely hungry.
‘Killing is the nature of wolves. Have you ever seen a wolf that doesn’t eat meat?’
Ruan Shaonan’s words entered her ears like a poisonous snake. Wei Xi froze completely, but the man holding her didn’t notice, taking her fear as tacit consent. He picked her up and carried her into the bedroom, clicked the door shut and locked it behind him.
He took off her sweater and pushed her down on the large white bed. He then impatiently pulled off his pajama pants and leaned over her. It was only then that Wei Xi woke up from her dream. His strong, naked body, with the enchanting flower tattoos on his shoulders, was like a terrifying illusion that scared her to the core.
Like a frightened child, she struggled up randomly, but Ling Luochuan, like a man possessed, clasped her hands above her head, forcefully spread her legs apart, pulled up the slender, white and provocative limb, and wrapped it around his waist, which was braced and ready.
Her legs were pressed against the side of his waist, trembling as if she were cold. Her wrists were already sprained, and the way he held them made them ache like hell. The abrasions on her knees and elbows had all split open, revealing red flesh. His rough movements caused her unbearable pain, and she wanted to tell him to stop, but her ruptured vocal cords could not make a sound.
She shouldn’t have smiled at him like that, it was too devastating for him. He didn’t want to care about anything anymore, he just wanted to possess her recklessly, make her moan and tremble, make her fall apart, he was crazy with the thought, but when he was about to thrust himself inside, he noticed her tension and trembling.
Every piece of flesh on her body was shrunk together, like a tightly closed clam, with a thin and crispy shell and fresh and delicious flesh. To possess her, he had to pry her open with her flesh still attached. He dared not force his way in, for fear of tearing her apart, but the arrow was already at the string, and he was driven red-eyed by his surging desire.
‘Weixi, Weixi…’ He whispered into her ear, his fingers intruding forcefully into her trembling body. His hot lips nibbled on her earlobe, his voice urgent and agitated. “God, be good, be good, okay? Give it to me, give it to me…”
But her tears flowed like a string, wetting his face. He knew she was crying, but he couldn’t control himself. He gazed at her tearful eyes, unwilling to look any longer. Even ignoring her pain, he ruthlessly rolled her over and buried her face in the expensive silk pillowcase.
His solid chest pressed against her back, her hands that just wouldn’t be honest were tied behind her back, and her tightly closed legs were forced apart by his strong thighs. The woman beneath him was like a small, tied-up horse, miserable and helpless.
He wanted to just send himself in like that, but holding her trembling body in his arms, he just couldn’t bring himself to do it. He let go of her hand, crossed his arms over her chest, and squeezed her ample breasts with his broad palms, moaning as he did so. Passionate kisses were branded on her shoulders, and he panted, saying, ‘My God, you’re driving me crazy. Weixi, be a good girl and let me in, okay? I don’t want to tear you apart…’
Wei Xi clutched the bed sheets beneath her, her face pressed against the pillowcase, sobbing helplessly, her eyes closed in resignation. This time she truly gave up. She no longer had the strength to resist anything. Every struggle only made her suffer more. Her first act of resistance only made her more desperate.
She just couldn’t understand why. He had promised her. He had said that he would never lie to her again. He had said that he would do his best to protect her from harm.
She remembered that night by the beautiful pond, and that was what he had said.
The bedroom was dark, as if it were a different world, a world without mercy, kindness or compassion.
Six months ago, she was the one who clung to the past and refused to let go. She was cheated and taken advantage of, and she had no one to blame but herself. And what about the six months after that? She had even repeated the same mistake and been completely cheated by this man?
Yes, they were the ones sitting on top of the world and doing whatever they wanted. So she was really stupid, really.
What could she do by running away here? Ruan Shaonan was right to laugh at her, because she had actually thought that he would be different, but in the end, they had both ended up in the same place, just by different routes.
When the pain came, she clenched her lips and sobbed silently, telling herself over and over again, ‘This is your retribution for speaking the truth even though it was not welcome, for being blind and unable to recognise people clearly. Bear with it, bear with it and it will pass. If you can bear with it this time, you can completely let go of your heart…’
‘Sigh…”
The man let out a long sigh in the darkness, lit a bedside lamp, and looked confusedly at the woman lying beneath him in the orange light.
He liked white, and all the bedding was white. At the moment, the quilt was like snow, and the duvet like waves. Her fair body was reflected in the snow-white silk, even whiter than spring snow. Like a holy snow lotus, she was almost tragically beautiful.
It is so beautiful that one cannot help but want to pollute it, to poison it, to hunt it, to leave one’s own mark on this whiteness.
If one cannot see her tears or her pain, can one not carry on with this cruel plunder?
His kiss branded her smooth back. Feeling like he had been drugged, she was in the palm of his hand, weak and beautiful, lonely and helpless. It seemed so easy to take, but he could not do so.
Taking a few deep breaths to try and rein himself in, he turned her trembling body around, kissed her reddened eyes, and sighed, ‘You must be cursing me in your heart again, aren’t you? I’m sorry, I’ve offended you. I was so carried away that I took your silence as consent, and I even forgot…’ His fingers brushed her lips, ‘You can’t speak, even if you don’t want to, you can’t say anything. But Weixi, you really have me confused. If this were any other woman, I would think it was a game of denial she was playing. But I know that you are not like that. Weixi, can you tell me what you really think? Sometimes I feel that you are close, but in the blink of an eye, you are far away again. I am a impatient person. Even if I try to be understanding and care for you, if you keep treating me like this, I really can’t guarantee that I will be able to control myself next time.
Seeing that she kept her head down and wouldn’t answer, the man forcefully lifted her chin, his impatient eyes meeting her panic-stricken ones. ‘You don’t feel nothing for me, do you? Wei Xi, tell me, is all of this just wishful thinking on my part? If you say yes, then at least let me heal you, let me see you well, so that I can rest assured, so that I can completely let you go and continue living my life of indulgence. If you say that you have feelings for me, even if it’s just a little, I’m willing to continue waiting for you. Waiting for you to untie your heart, waiting for you to fall in love with me, waiting for you to let me touch you. Until then, I won’t do anything.”
After Ling Luochuan finished speaking, he kissed her forehead, pulled the thin quilt next to her and covered her, and then walked into the bathroom to take a shower.
Wei Xi sat on his bed wrapped in the quilt, listening to the sound of the rushing water in the bathroom. Half an hour later, the sound of the water stopped, and he came out, wearing a dark-coloured bathrobe, with wet black hair still dripping with water.
He poured a cup of hot tea and handed it to her, saying, ‘This is lavender tea, which can calm the nerves and relieve shock. After drinking it, you can sleep well.’
Wei Xi reached out to take it, and Ling Luochuan saw a circle of red fingerprints on her wrist, some of which were already purple. He was afraid that it would be even worse tomorrow. He also saw the blood oozing from the bruised area on her elbow, and red and purple marks all over her neck and shoulders…anywhere her skin was exposed outside the quilt, red and purple marks could be seen everywhere, not to mention the skin underneath the quilt, which was naturally not in good condition either. His heart felt like a bottle of mixed emotions that had been overturned, full of pain, regret, hatred, and anger.
He felt pain for her helplessness and weakness; remorse for his own wantonness and brutality; hatred for the fact that he had given his heart to her, only to be rejected; and anger at her apparent compassion, which was so clearly at odds with her actions.
He was overwhelmed with emotions, but dared not stay alone with her for too long. So he took her hands, placed a gentle kiss on her red wrist, and said, ‘Get a good night’s sleep, and we’ll talk about everything tomorrow. I’ll sleep in the other room, and when I’m gone, you can lock the door and not worry about being bothered.’
Ling Luochuan put her cup aside for her, carefully helped her lie down, and left her a wall lamp because he knew she was afraid of the dark. Then he stood up, planning to go to the study to kill the night away.
Wei Xi, however, grabbed his hand as he turned around.
The man looked down, ‘What does this mean?’
Wei Xi pulled the quilt up to sit up, and seeing a pen and sticky note pad on the bedside table, she picked them up and wrote, ‘I’m scared, can you not go?’
‘Huh?’ Ling Luochuan was almost petrified, and touched her face, “Do you know what you’re saying?”
Wei Xi shook her head and wrote again, “Just sleep next to me and don’t do anything, okay? I’m scared, I’m scared, if you leave, I’m afraid to close my eyes alone.”
Ling Luochuan looked at her curiously, ’Wei Xi, don’t you think this request is too much, a bit like taking advantage of the situation?’
Wei Xi hung her head in defeat, wrote, ‘I’m sorry, I…’ and couldn’t continue.
The man looked at her helplessly, touched her face, and sighed, ‘I really lose to you. But don’t say I didn’t warn you, I’m not a saint, if I get horny in the middle of the night, don’t blame me.’
Chapter 47: She hates me as much as she hates you
The night passed without incident. The next morning, the two of them didn’t get up until it was bright and light.
During breakfast, Ling Luochuan couldn’t hold back any longer and asked the person sitting across from him, who was intently drinking milk and reading the newspaper, ‘Weixi, do you like me or not?’
Weixi looked up, glanced at him, nodded, and then returned her gaze to the newspaper.
Ling Luochuan was stunned and thought to himself, ‘Is that it?’
So he strode over, grabbed Weixi’s hand and said, ‘Little grandma, can you be a bit more specific? How exactly do you like me? How much do you like me? I’m telling you, stop reading and put the milk away for a bit!’
Ling Luochuan snatched her newspaper away from her, took her milk glass away from her and then bossily thrust a pen and paper into her hands.
Weixi looked at him, then at the objects in her hands, and said in sign language, ‘What’s your hurry?’
Ling Luochuan pulled her up and dragged her to the sofa, saying, ‘Can I not be anxious? This concerns my happiness for the rest of my life.’
Wei Xi’s heart warmed, and she instantly forgot everything, as well as the threats, warnings, hurt, and ridicule from another man. She smiled and wrote on the paper, ‘Last night, I was actually very sad…’
Ling Luochuan immediately interrupted her anxiously, ‘I was in the wrong about last night. Didn’t I apologize to you? You shouldn’t be afraid of me and reject me because of this.’
Wei Xi shook her head and continued writing: ‘I’m not sad because I’m afraid, but because you didn’t do what you promised me. In fact, I knew a long time ago that I had feelings for you. These feelings are comfortable, dangerous, special, and very strong. If it were six months ago, I would have said to you without hesitation, I like you. But now…’
Wei Xi paused for a moment, and Ling Luochuan felt his heart almost jump out of his chest. He anxiously asked, ‘What now?’
‘Now, after going through so many things, there is someone I can’t seem to face normally. You should know who I’m talking about. You’re so close, and there are so many things I don’t want to say. Because I don’t want you to think I’m using you to get back at him. And I don’t want you to suspect I have ulterior motives just because I said a few bad things about him in your ear. You’re a person who doesn’t tolerate sand in their eyes, and can’t stand the slightest humiliation or mistreatment. Even if it’s someone you love the most, you won’t forgive her for taking advantage of you and deceiving you. I don’t want to say much about him. But I don’t know if you can understand, I really can’t stand waiting for you to come home while you’re having a drink with him. I don’t want to see him again on any occasion. And even if I can live with him peacefully, what if one day he encourages you to suspect and hurt me? So I’m very scared. The more I feel that I might like you, the more I fear it. Do you understand this feeling?”
Seeing this, Ling Luochuan felt both pain and guilt in his heart. He hugged her tightly and whispered, “I’m sorry, it was my negligence that I didn’t understand your feelings earlier. I should have thought of many things earlier, I was too careless. Don’t worry, I will take care of everything.”
Wei Xi felt that there was another mystery in his words, and wrote on the paper, ’How will you handle it?’
Ling Luochuan kissed her forehead and laughed, ‘Just don’t worry about it. Just focus on your classes and your paintings. Leave the rest to me, you don’t need to worry about anything.’
At his villa, Ruan Shaonan picked up the termination letter on the coffee table, looked it over carefully, and laughed. ‘You’re not joking with me, are you? If you terminate the contract with me, your dynasty will have to pay a lot of money. Have you thought it over?’
Ling Luochuan shrugged. ‘It doesn’t matter. First, I can afford it. Second, I’ve never considered making money to be the greatest joy in life.’
Ruan Shaonan shook his head and laughed lightly, throwing the stack of documents back on the table, ‘I know, you’ve always acted with panache. But I’m afraid you can’t make this decision on your own. Will the old guys on the board agree?’
‘Those are the old officials who have followed my grandfather. I’ve let them make a lot of money over the years. Besides, I have something on each of them. Do you think they will agree?’
“Haha, I’m impressed. So there’s no room for negotiation at all?’
Ling Luochuan picked up the hidden knife on the table, drew it out, and looked at its cold blade in the light. He smiled and said, ‘If you hadn’t gone to see her, there might still be a way. But now, I have to draw a line with you.’
Ruan Shaonan was not surprised. He poured himself a glass of red wine and said, ‘Did she tell you? I thought that although you were ridiculous in the world of romance, you were never the kind of man to let lust cloud your judgment. It seems that I overestimated you.’
“She didn’t say anything. That silly girl is just too cautious and careful, so she was bullied and didn’t dare tell me. But if you pay more attention, you can detect it. Since that incident six months ago, whenever something related to you comes up, she will lose her temper. You can’t be unaware of this, can you?”
Ruan Shaonan was very surprised and said, “Really? So I caused her so much trouble. I’m sorry, I really didn’t know.”
Ling Luochuan looked at his expression of feigned surprise and coldly smiled, ’The night before last, she came to see me in the middle of the night in the pouring rain. I should have guessed that you had gone to see her. I don’t know what you said to her, but it seems that those were the words that finally made her face her feelings for me. From that perspective, I should thank you. But remember, don’t do it again!”
Ling Luochuan stood up, picked up the hidden knife on the table, and waved it in front of Ruan Shaonan. ’I’ll take this with me, you’re not a knife lover, I’m sure you won’t mind. Also, if there’s nothing special, I think we should see each other less. You know, Weixi doesn’t like seeing your face very much.‘
Looking at Ling Luochuan’s back, Ruan Shaonan shook his head and sneered, “That woman, do you really think you know her completely?”
Ling Luochuan stopped in his tracks and turned around, asking, “What do you mean?”
’A few days ago, I redecorated the Lu family mansion, and their old housekeeper told me something very interesting. It turned out that back then, the second young lady of the family did not run away from home on her own, but was driven out by Lu Zixu.’
‘What are you talking about?‘
’My reaction was just like yours. But the reason she was driven out of the house is even more shocking. You should remember that the Luk family had a daughter named Luk Yau-hei who was paralysed and bedridden. It turned out that her younger sister was pushed down the stairs by her. At the time, she broke her cervical spine. Fortunately, she was rescued in time and her life was saved, but she became a paraplegic invalid and had to spend the rest of her life in bed.’
Ling Luochuan frowned, his sharp eyes fixed on him. Ruan Shaonan laughed and said, ‘If you don’t believe me, you can check it out yourself, and you’ll know that what I said is true. It’s really terrifying to think about it. At that time, she was only thirteen or fourteen years old, and she could do such a terrible thing to her own younger sister. And now, without her saying a word, you’re going to risk your life for her. She hasn’t said anything, but she’s achieved a better effect than if she had. With a woman like that, would you dare let her sleep in your bed?’
‘Scorpio women have a strong sense of revenge. The most terrifying thing is that they will definitely take revenge if they have a grudge. They are often more calm and self-controlled when taking revenge than usual, and they don’t even care if everything is destroyed.‘
’Luo Chuan, if I were you, I would first find out whether she is coming after me or something else. I think you should remember who tricked her into coming back to me in the first place. Don’t forget, I was the main culprit and you were an accomplice in what happened back then. She hates me as much as she hates you.’
Ruan Shaonan stood up and put the termination of contract in the wine cabinet. ‘I will keep this termination of contract for now. We can sign it when you have figured everything out.’
Ling Luochuan looked at his former best friend with an expressionless face and said, ‘If I were you, hearing those words just now would be enough to sentence her to death. Unfortunately, I am not you, and I believe her. Even if she really used me, so what? As long as she is willing to stay by my side, as long as I can make her happy, I will kill anyone who gets in my way, even if it means killing God and Buddha… ‘He smiled as he said this, ’Including you! So, don’t say a single word to slander her in front of me again. Otherwise, don’t blame me for disregarding our many years of brotherhood. You know, I have the means and the ability to do so.’
Ling Luochuan turned to go to the door. As he was about to leave, he suddenly remembered something and said, ‘Oh yes, I almost forgot to tell you. Your company, Yitian, has also submitted a bid for the government’s reclamation project, right? I’m really sorry, but the project has already been awarded to our company, Dynasty. As friends for many years, I’ll give you some advice: in the future, whenever Dynasty participates in a bid, Yitian should avoid it. You can’t beat me at this.’
Ling Luochuan left, and Gu Yongling came downstairs. She saw Ruan Shaonan sitting alone in the living room drinking. She walked over and sat down next to him. ‘Why did he leave so quickly? Did you have a fight?’
Ruan Shaonan turned his face, stroked the woman’s long, silky hair, and laughed, ‘The child was disobedient, so he deserved a lesson.’
Gu Yongling smiled elegantly, leaned into the man’s arms, and whispered, ‘What about me? If one day I offend you, will you also teach me a lesson?’
Ruan Shaonan lifted her chin and laughed, ‘How is that the same? You are my future wife, who can compare with you?’
The woman snuggled up to him contentedly, sighing lightly, ‘Shaonan, you are so good to me.’
Ruan Shaonan had a charming smile on the corner of his mouth. His body was here, but his heart had long since flown out of the villa, across the street, through the neon lights, with a strong desire and an absolute purpose, to the musty pigeon coop house in the slums.
He could hear the sound of the rain that night, and her rapid but sweet breathing. She gazed into his eyes in the dark, tears of despair and pain, a silent scream and resistance.
Ruan Shaonan picked up his fiancée and carried her back to the bedroom. The curtains were closed in the entire house, and it was so dark you couldn’t see your hand in front of your face, but he didn’t turn on the lights.
At midnight, Ruan Shaonan lit the wall lamp, and the woman next to him was fast asleep. He wanted to smoke, but then he suddenly remembered that she had asthma and could not smoke in the confined bedroom.
He took the cigarette down and turned his face to look at it. He saw the soft and beautiful face of Gu Yongling in the light, and he couldn’t help but freeze for a moment. He put the cigarette back to his lips, lit it, and took a few deep breaths… But it was still not enough. No matter what he did, he could not be satisfied. It was as if there was a black hole in his heart that could never be filled.
He put on his pajamas, went into the study, turned on the computer, clicked on an encrypted folder, and there was only one file inside. It was an electronic photo album with music, with photos taken in Yunnan. This was the only thing she left him.
He thought again about the villa that had been sold. They had been together for so long, but she had left with nothing, except her love for him.
Ruan Shaonan leaned back in his chair, watching silently. He suddenly remembered what Ling Luochuan had said:
‘I’m not you, and I believe in her. Even if she really did use me, so what? As long as she’s willing to stay by my side, as long as I can make her happy, I’ll kill anyone who gets in my way, including you.”
Ruan Shaonan closed his eyes and smiled, whispering to the empty room, ’In this world, the person who knows her best and believes in her most…is me, not you. So, you can’t.’
Chapter 48: Heart-wrenching
Mid-Autumn Festival is approaching, and the festive atmosphere in the city is getting stronger and stronger. As if the heavens could sense the longing for a beautiful time, it hasn’t rained for several days, and it’s been sunny.
The tranquil lake reflects the golden sunlight, making people feel drowsy.
Ling Luochuan, sitting on a bamboo chair with his upper body exposed, looks at the person who is absorbed in painting. He suddenly realises that she looks really beautiful with a paintbrush in her hand.
The setting sun, the clear waves and the green water, the person in front of him has snow-white skin and indigo hair. When the wind blows, the light hair looks like a naughty little brush, floating over and over the seductive curve of her shoulders.
Who says that only a man who is concentrating on his work is the sexiest? It turns out that a woman who is concentrating on her work is just as seductive.
The man couldn’t help but walk over, clingingly hugging her from behind, and never wanting to let go again. Wei Xi smiled, rubbed her face with paint on it against his, and wrote on the paper, ‘A model should be sitting on a chair.’
Ling Luochuan hugged her and rocked her from side to side, laughing, ‘I know, but you have to charge me up a bit so I can keep being your free labour.’
Wei Xi turned her face around and asked in sign language, ‘Are you hungry? I’ll go make something to eat?’
The man smiled evilly and said, ‘Yes, I’m very hungry.’
He then tried to kiss her, but she blocked his advances with her hand. He laughed and let it go.
‘By the way, I have something to show you. Let’s go inside first.’ He picked up his shirt and casually threw it on, leaving the buttons unbuttoned. Then he took Wei Xi’s hand and dragged her into the house.
Wei Xi held him back and pointed with her finger, ‘What about my painting?’
‘It’s okay, this island is only connected to the villa and there are no other entrances, so it can’t be lost.’
Wei Xi was pulled into the study by him, where she saw him take out a dark blue brocade box from the bookshelf, wipe off the dust on it, and put it in her hands.
Wei Xi didn’t understand why, so the man gestured for her to open it. When she opened it, she saw that it contained a jade unicorn carved from the finest nephrite jade.
The jade was translucent and warm in texture, with a pink misty feel in the light, and not a speck of impurity. The shape of the qilin was also carved quite uniquely, as if it were alive.
Wei Xi asked in sign language, ‘Is this for me?’
Ling Luochuan nodded, ‘This was left to me by my grandfather. I heard that it was passed down from generation to generation, and seems to have quite a history, but it’s all old stories, and I can’t remember clearly.’
Then he took out the unicorn from the box and wanted to hang it around Weixi’s neck.
Weixi stepped back and, seeing the strange look in the man’s eyes, wrote on the paper with her head bowed: ‘It’s too precious, I can’t accept it. Besides, you are a talented person, and wearing this will complement each other. I am young and my blessings are few, I’m afraid I can’t hold it down.’
Ling Luochuan was delighted when he saw her. He pinched her chin and laughed, ‘You girl, you refuse to accept anything from me. Do you think I’m going to charge you interest? I know you’re proud, so if it were just any ordinary jewellery, I wouldn’t have given it to you. But this is different. The qilin is a mythical beast that wards off evil spirits and misfortune. You should wear it well in the future. Even if I’m not by your side, I’ll be at ease knowing it’s protecting you.’
Wei Xi smiled with her head bowed. Ling Luochuan saw that she was not going to refuse anymore, so he took the opportunity to put it around her neck. The red silk thread against her snow-white complexion looked like the morning sun reflecting off the snow.
The man couldn’t help but kiss the white neck, smiling and saying, ‘This thing suits you, the beautiful autumn water talent, but it would be a waste for me to have it.’
Wei Xi smiled happily and wrote on the paper, ‘People say that a humble gentleman is gentle and warm like jade. Don’t you aspire to be a gentleman? A gentleman naturally deserves a beautiful jade to go with it.”
Ling Luochuan leaned in closer to Wei Xi, trapping her between himself and the bookcase, his strong chest pressed against her, his voice hoarse as he said, “But I don’t want to be a gentleman right now, I just want to be the kind of person who takes advantage of other people’s misfortunes. What should I do?”
Wei Xi lifted her face and looked at his face, which was enough to confuse anyone. It was then that she realised that his name had indeed been given correctly.
Luo Chuan, rain falling in the river. The light in his eyes is very similar to the raindrops falling from the eaves of the Lu family mansion that she saw as a child, and it always evokes a thousand kinds of sadness in her heart, like watching a high-flying kite lose its string, listening to the eternal sound of music break the strings.
Beautiful things are always fleeting, as they have been throughout the ages.
Ling Luochuan looked at her in disbelief, ‘I was just saying that, you don’t need to be so sad.’ He lowered his head and kissed her eyes, sighing, ‘Poor thing, I won’t scare you again. Look at you, your tears are about to fall.’
Wei Xi pressed her face into his bare chest, wrapping her arms around his waist. For some reason, at this moment, she was so afraid of losing him. She was so afraid of being so close that her whole body and heart shrunk together.
Ling Luochuan lifted her chin and asked, ‘What’s wrong? You suddenly looked so sad, it made my heart ache.’
Weixi didn’t say anything, just tilted her face up and put her toes up, giving the man’s well-shaped lips a gentle kiss.
The kiss was so shocking that Ling Luochuan touched his lips and looked at her in a daze. Her face flushed, and she turned around and walked away. But before she had taken a single step, he grabbed her arm and dragged her back.
With a crash, he knocked over a pile of books on the table, and then roughly pushed her down on the spacious desk.
The desk was hard and uncomfortable, and it hurt her a little. When she tried to sit up, he pressed her shoulders down again. With a pull of his hands, he half-lifted her shirt, revealing her black bra and snow-white skin.
Before she could react, his hands had gone around to the back of her body, impatiently unbuttoning her bra and pulling it off and throwing it aside. His large hands kneaded her white, plump breasts, but he was not satisfied yet. He lowered his head and bit down firmly on her snow-white teeth.
Wei Xi felt as if she had been electrocuted, from head to toe, with a current of pleasure that flowed to her limbs and her very core, bringing with it a thrill that bordered on trembling. His burning passion and sweet nibbles were like a fire ignited within her, making her eyes water and her mind a blank with desire.
She tilted her neck and let out a soft gasp, her fingers clutching his shirt tightly as her body arched into a beautiful arc towards his, a body that was just as passionate as hers.
He bit and played with her breasts without restraint, like a greedy child. The slightly painful feeling was full of tenderness. She was so dizzy from his actions that she bit her lips and gently held his head. A pair of soft, boneless hands messed up his neck hair, stroked his beautiful tattoos, his strong shoulders and neck, and pulled the shirt he hung from his shoulders down little by little.
Such movements were almost provocative. The man lifted her chin with one hand and looked at her with bloodshot eyes in disbelief, ‘My God, are you seducing me?’
Yes, she was seducing him. She knew she was seducing him.
She had never been so bold, never so unrestrained, but she heard the voice in her heart: she wanted him! She really wanted him! No threat, no fear, no fear. Just a woman simply wanting a man she loved, and that’s how she wanted him!
Her breathing was rapid, her half-naked body pressed against his attractive chest, her slightly cool lips kissing his strong skin, her white teeth biting the red dots on his chest, just as he had done to her, using his pink tongue, slender fingers, and soft body to seduce him without reservation…
The man clasped her side of the neck and slammed her back onto the cool, hard desk.
Oh my god! Wei Xi could hear her spine creak under the weight of his body. Could this young master not be a little more gentle?
He propped himself up on his arms and looked down at the little woman who had almost broken him, like some kind of predatory beast, panting heavily, his gaze locked with hers as he squeezed her chin and said harshly, ‘Think carefully before you call it off halfway through, I won’t agree to that!’
Wei Xi leaned slightly and kissed her, without saying anything.
Ling Luochuan waved his hand casually, and the desk was empty and the floor was in a mess. He pulled the cushion from the chair, placed it on the desk, picked her up and placed her on it, and neatly took off her skirt, revealing her beautiful, slender legs. As if a hungry fanatic, his hot kisses were branded on her inner thighs one after the other, causing her cheeks to burn and her whole body to tremble.
Soldier! The sound of a buckle coming undone, the man impatiently pulled out his belt, took off his trousers, and with his strong arms, he held up her legs. He dragged this body full of lust in front of him, his swollen desire rubbing against her tenderness, eager to penetrate and crush her, to hold her tightly in his arms and sink into her body.
But at this moment, at this sound of metal snapping, Wei Xi heard this familiar sound, as if she had returned to that terrible rainy night and that musty hut.
The person in front of her had also changed into another appearance, one that made her see and be afraid, her heart and liver shattered and her insides in flames.
Her lips turned pale, and she felt cold all over, as if she had fallen into a 39-day ice cellar, with all her blood, all her passion, and all her joy flowing back upstream.
She could feel his strong arms around her body; she could feel her hands hanging around his neck; she could feel his agile fingers pushing her underwear to the side, gently exploring her lower body and relieving her tension.
But she couldn’t move, no matter how tenderly the man holding her was.
However, the passionate man could no longer wait. In this position, with this movement, the moment her body hung in the air, she realised what he was going to do. She trembled with nervousness, her teeth chattering, and looked at him with near sadness. She wanted to beg him to spare her, but she couldn’t make a sound.
The most painful moment would still come.
When he thrust into her, her fingernails almost dug into his flesh. Her whole body was tense as a thousand-year-old fossil, her neck arched as if she were a swan about to sing, and she let out a silent wail into the sky.
But the man, blinded by lust, was oblivious to all this horror and unbearable pain.
He let out a low, contented groan in her ear, rubbed his face against her pale one, bit her chin, and murmured tenderly, ‘Weixi, you’re mine, you’re mine…’
Clang! It was like the final blow before breaking. She struggled up like a cat that had been held under water, going crazy.
The man, who had just been immersed in joy, looked at her face, which was almost distorted with pain, in surprise. Her fists rained down on his back, and her legs, which he had held up, kicked and spasmed helplessly.
He dared not move again, but he could not just come out like that either. He crossed her wildly pounding hands behind her back, looped his arms around her body, took her nipples in his mouth, raised her thighs, and suppressed the desire to charge forward, slowly pulling back and forth.
When Wei Xi saw her own tight lower body, she could feel it bumping against the man’s rigid belly, and it actually hurt like a knife stabbing her. The place where she was connected to him felt like it had been split open by someone, and the pain was heart-wrenching. She struggled desperately, but the arms holding her were like a steel cage. She was in excruciating pain, but she couldn’t make a sound. She clenched her lips together in a spasm, and within a few seconds, blood flowed from the corners of her mouth.
Ling Luochuan was really shocked by the scene in front of him. He quickly withdrew, and as soon as he let go of her, she fell unconsciously onto the desk behind her like a broken puppet.
He wanted to see if she was okay, but she seemed afraid to look at his strong, naked body again, covering her face tightly and curling up on the desk like a small animal that had been skinned, her whole body twitching.
Ling Luochuan thought that his movements during intercourse had been too wild and rough, and that he had frightened her. He immediately put his arms around her shoulders, pressed his face against hers, and stroked her softly. ‘It’s okay, Weixi, we won’t do it anymore, don’t be afraid… don’t be afraid…’
After an unknown period of time, she gradually recovered, like a frightened little bird, wrapping her arms around his neck and crying.
Ling Luochuan sighed and kissed her forehead, ‘I really scared you. If you can’t do it, don’t force yourself. If you suffer, others will suffer with you.’
Wei Xi knew that she had lost her temper, and that her loss of temper was unreasonable, but she couldn’t control herself. Even if it was him she was facing, and even if her heart was full of happiness and expectation when he embraced her, she couldn’t control herself. Ruan Shaonan had had such a profound impact on her that they were almost connected at the bone marrow level. To break free, she would have to rip her skin off.
Slowly, she raised her head in his arms, tears streaming down her face, and repeated over and over in sign language, ‘I’m sorry, I’m sorry…’
He took her hand and sighed, ‘Silly girl, you don’t need to apologize to me. You forgot what I told you: I’m willing to wait for you. As long as you have me in your heart, I can wait for as long as you like. It’s okay, we still have a long life ahead of us.’
Wei Xi threw her arms around the man’s waist and threw herself into his arms, feeling her cold body gradually warming up in his embrace. She found that she was like a sunflower blooming in the dark, growing more and more attached to this warmth, to his embrace.
Ling Luochuan, however, very uncooperatively patted her on the shoulder and said a little embarrassed, ‘Wei Xi, you’d better let go of me now, I feel like… I need to go take a cold shower.’
Wei Xi laughed and put her arms around him, wiping away her tears. She signed to him, ‘Take your time washing up, I’ll cook for you.’
Wei Xi’s cooking skills were really not to be praised. Ling Luochuan looked at the blackened piece of food and really couldn’t recognise it. It was the juicy, fatty steak in his fridge.
Wei Xi couldn’t swallow after just one bite, and apologetically gestured, ‘I think we’d better order takeaway.’
Ling Luochuan elegantly took a sip of red wine and slowly replied, ‘You pay for the takeaway, since you wasted a good piece of steak. Of course, if you want to pay for the meat with money, I won’t object.’
Wei Xi glared at him hatefully. This young master really doesn’t suffer at all.
Since it was Wei Xi who was paying, the two of them only ordered a simple wonton noodle dish with the restaurant’s signature side dish.
After dinner, the two of them snuggled on the sofa, eating ice cream while watching TV. Wei Xi held the small spoon, taking a spoonful for herself and feeding the man in her arms a spoonful.
The TV was showing an old Taiwanese movie, with the woman crying miserably while hugging the man’s thigh, ‘Don’t leave me, don’t leave me…’
Wei Xi felt numb, but Ling Luochuan was engrossed in the scene, and said to the little woman in his arms, ‘Look at that person, when are you…’
Before he could finish his sentence, Wei Xi used the ice cream in the spoon to block his mouth. Some of the ice cream melted, and it got all over his chin. Wei Xi put down the ice cream cup, smiled, and took out a tissue to wipe it off for him.
But he flipped her over with a backhand, pinned her to the sofa, narrowed his eyes slightly, and grinned slyly, ‘Do you remember how I bullied you when we first met? After that, I didn’t sleep well for several days. Now I really want to do it again…’
He said this and then lowered his head, rubbing his chin against her face. The ice cream sauce was sticky and sweet. While Wei Xi laughed, she kept on avoiding him, but he became more and more addicted to the game. Slowly, the game changed its flavour.
But at this moment, Wei Xi’s mobile phone rang very unpleasantly.
Very few people knew her mobile number, and apart from the harassment calls from Master Ling, most of them were urgent matters. Wei Xi did not dare to neglect it, so she took it out of her pocket, but he pressed it against the sofa with her wrist.
He bent down to kiss her, but she smiled and avoided it, pointing her free hand to his lips and then to the thing that was beeping non-stop, meaning, ‘Let me answer the phone first.’
The man reluctantly let her go, but refused to leave, lingeringly kissing her neck, making her feel numb and itchy.
Wei Xi suppressed her laughter, picked up the phone, and Chi Mo’s voice came out of the receiver, clear and cool, landing on the eardrums of the two people.
‘Weixi, I’m home.”
Ling Luochuan sat on the sofa watching TV as if nothing had happened, but he had no idea what he was watching. Weixi walked over to him, leaned down in front of him, and said in sign language, “I’ll go first?”
Ling Luochuan turned his face and body to the other side, pretending not to see.
Weixi deliberately blocked his view and said in sign language, “You’re not seeing me off?”
The man stood up, grabbed her shoulders, moved her aside, and continued watching his own.
Wei Xi thought for a moment, wrote a few words on a piece of paper, stuck it on his back, and turned around and left.
Ling Luochuan watched him go out the door, and when he pulled the note off his back, he saw that it said, ‘Stingy, it’s dark outside, and you’re not walking me out? If I meet a pervert, I’ll hate you forever.’
The man crumpled the note into a ball, picked up his jacket on the sofa, and hurriedly chased after him.
On the way back, Ling Luochuan saw Wei Xi’s anxious expression in the rearview mirror and said with some surprise, ‘What’s the rush? He’s not dying, is he? He came back safely, didn’t he?’
Wei Xi looked at his face, which was changing from one expression to another, and wrote in her notebook, ‘He left in a hurry, and I just want to make sure as soon as possible that he’s really safe and sound. Are you angry?’
When she asked him this, he didn’t know what to say, so he just said, ‘I’m not angry, I just can’t help feeling resentful. We were both born to parents, why is he so precious?”
Wei Xi was amused by his words and wrote, “You’re still saying you’re not angry, but you can’t even speak properly. How can he compare to you? You’ve been loved by so many people since birth, and you still have the love of thousands. He doesn’t have a single family member. We’re both orphans, so naturally we have to support each other. If you’re angry about that too, then I really don’t know what to say.”
Ling Luochuan looked at the road ahead and sighed, ’Actually, I am worried. I know that he goes to fight underground boxing all for you. A man can do this much for a woman, and I can tell what kind of thoughts he is holding, just by looking at him. Weixi…”
He suddenly turned his face and asked seriously, “If one day, I fall into the water with him, who will you save?”
Hearing this question, Weixi was so mad at him that she glanced at him and wrote on the paper with her head bowed, ’I’ll save whoever is more handsome.’
The man was speechless after reading this and was quiet the whole way.
Ling Luochuan’s sports car was parked underneath the pigeon cage building. Wei Xi opened the car door and turned around to see the man looking glum. She couldn’t help but smile and wrote on the paper, ‘You really think too much. We’re not in that kind of relationship. When I have some free time, I’ll explain it to you properly. Goodnight, and drive carefully.’
Ling Luochuan nodded, looked up, and said, ‘Wait for me after school tomorrow, I’ll pick you up.’
Wei Xi nodded, got out of the car, and then watched the taillights of his car disappear at the intersection before turning around and going up the stairs.
Chapter 49: Robbery
The nights in the slums are always colourful and varied, full of cheap pleasures and lowbrow entertainment.
Chi Mo stood on the balcony, drinking a beer while looking at the garish neon lights in the street. Wei Xi looked at his back nervously, and when she got to his side, she asked in sign language, ‘Are you angry?’
Chi Mo shook his head, ‘I’m not angry, I’m just worried about you. I’m afraid that if you trust the wrong person, you’ll be the one who suffers in the end.’
Wei Xi smiled when she thought about the scene during the day and said in sign language, ‘No, I have confidence in him.’
Chi Mo smiled helplessly and patted her forehead. ‘I know, you’ve always been smart. But I’m afraid you’re too simple and won’t be able to judge people correctly, and you’ll end up getting yourself into trouble. He’s not a simple person. His family, status, and background are incomparable to ordinary people. Anyway, you should be more careful.’
Wei Xi felt warm in her heart and said in sign language, ‘I’m sorry for always making you worry about me.’
Chi Mo smiled and patted her on the forehead. ‘Yes, I owe you from my past life.’
‘Don’t go to Wei Chengbao’s boxing match again. He said he would pay for my treatment. Don’t take any more risks, I’m worried.’
Chi Mo sighed. ‘As the saying goes, it’s easy to go up the mountain, but hard to come down. I can’t just stop this kind of thing when I want to.’
Hearing this, Wei Xi was very anxious. ‘What should I do?’
Chi Mo stroked her flushed face and reassured her, ‘Don’t worry, I know what I’m doing. Besides, I want to save up more money for the future, and I can’t do this kind of work forever.’
‘I’m sorry, if it weren’t for me…’
Chi Mo put his arm around her shoulders and laughed, ‘Silly girl, don’t take on all the responsibility yourself. I told you before, no matter what kind of hurt you receive, the heart that loves someone is never meaningless. I did all this willingly for you. If it becomes a burden to you instead, it would be a waste of my hard work, not to mention it would do me no good either.”
Wei Xi was speechless, hugging the man’s bruised and battered body. She couldn’t help but cry when she thought about his kindness.
Perhaps, in this world, there are always some people that you are destined to owe for the rest of your life.
It was a quiet night in the villa area, with the man-made lake reflecting the stars in the sky. The sky was clear and blue, the dark clouds like fluffy cotton wool, and the mountains in the distance looked like galloping beasts.
Ling Luochuan sat on the bamboo chair from the day on the CD player playing a melodious piano piece, quietly looking at the easel in front of him.
On a night like this, feeling quietly thinking of someone is really beautiful.
He stood up, walked over to the easel, touched his face on the paper, and recalled the scene from the day. He said tenderly, ‘Weixi, do you know? In the sunlight, your smile is my paradise. I’ll leave my heart with you, and I just hope you’ll keep it safe for me. Don’t ever let it get broken, because if it does, I won’t be able to go on…’
The next day in class, Zhou Xiaofan noticed that Weixi kept looking down at his watch.
‘What? Is he coming to pick you up in a moment?”
Wei Xi nodded at the large screen and wrote on a piece of paper, “Time passes slowly… I finally understand how you felt at the beginning.”
Zhou Xiaofan covered her mouth and laughed, nervously bumping into her and whispering, “You’re so aloof, and you’ve finally come to your senses.”
Wei Xi smiled, pulled up her sleeve to cover her hand, and continued listening to the lecture.
After class, Zhou Xiaofan was called away by the department head, and Wei Xi walked out alone. She looked around at the school gate, but didn’t see Ling Luochuan’s car.
She wanted to give him a call, but thought that he might be busy and didn’t call after all. This wasn’t the first time he had stood her up; sometimes he got so busy that he forgot he had a date with her.
She waited at the gate for a while, seeing that her classmates had mostly dispersed. She was debating whether to go home first when her phone rang. It was Ling Luochuan calling.
Wei Xi picked up the phone and heard Ling’s voice, sounding flustered. ‘Sorry, Wei Xi, I’m going to have to break our date today. There’s been some kind of computer problem at the office. Can you go home by yourself?’
Wei Xi nodded quickly, then realised that he couldn’t see her nod, so she tapped twice on the receiver to indicate that she could go.
“So I’ll call you when I’m done?’
Wei Xi nodded again, meaning ‘yes.’
All she heard was someone saying, ‘Mr. Ling, the computer engineer’s emergency measures have been issued. What do you think…’
Ling Luochuan responded, then said to Wei Xi, ‘Sorry, I’m really busy right now, I can’t talk to you anymore. Wait for my call.’ Then he hung up.
Listening to the busy signal, Wei Xi felt a little lost. But men, especially men like him, always have to put their careers first.
So he shrugged his shoulders, picked up his bag and walked alone towards the bus stop.
The school was in the suburbs, and there were few cars and people on the road. The late autumn sunset was warm but not violent. Wei Xi held up his hand to block the sunlight filtering through the leaves, and looked at the tree-lined road as he walked.
For some reason, he suddenly felt like appreciating the scenery. Perhaps it was because of his presence.
He couldn’t help but smile to himself.
‘Don’t keep your head down, it’ll give you wrinkles.‘
’I like seeing you with your head held high, like a deer listening to the wind.”
Wei Xi looked up, smiled at the sunlight on the leaves, and continued on her way. She was oblivious to the fact that a silver grey car had been following her silently the whole time.
Ruan Shaonan sat in the car, always smiling and watching her. Is she really this happy? I’m afraid that happiness can bring sorrow…
‘Mr. Ruan, Miss Lu has already left. Do you need to follow her?’ The driver turned his head and asked his boss.
Ruan Shaonan closed his eyes and shook his head, “No, let’s go back.”
The phone rang. He answered it and listened for a while, then said, ’You’ve arranged things very well. Listen, there must not be the slightest mistake in today’s events. Otherwise, I’ll expose you!’
When Wei Xi returned home, Ru Fei, who happened to be there, was a little surprised to see her come back so early and asked, ‘Didn’t you have an appointment with him today? Why are you back so early?’
Wei Xi put her backpack away and signed, ‘Something came up at his company.’ She looked around and asked, ‘Chi Mo went out again?’
Ru Fei nodded, ‘I heard that a big boss is going to place a big bet today. Wei seems to take it quite seriously and called him early.’
Wei Xi had a bad feeling, ‘Did he say who it was?’
Ru Fei shook her head, ‘I’m afraid he doesn’t know either. Those bosses are all well-known. To watch that kind of competition, they naturally have to find a place where no one else can see it, and enjoy it slowly by themselves. Watching other people’s flesh and blood flying everywhere, they are incredibly happy. Ugh! One is more perverted than the other.’
Wei Xi felt panicked for some reason. Ru Fei, who had seen her face turn white, comforted her, saying, ‘He’s always been good at martial arts. It’s not easy for ordinary people to take him down. You shouldn’t worry too much.’
After comforting Wei Xi for a while, Ru Fei went to work. Wei Xi took a shower and sat on the bed alone, looking at her fingers, which were twisted together. Her heart was racing and she couldn’t calm down.
She looked at the mobile phone on the bedside table, always feeling that it would ring at any moment, bringing her devastating news.
After a short while, it did ring.
Wei Xi pressed her hand against her heart and picked up the phone nervously. When she heard the other person’s voice, she looked ahead in surprise, her breathing almost stopping. A pair of dark, bright eyes instantly turned into a desolate wasteland.
The darkness was endless…
Ruan Shaonan sat alone in the living room of the penthouse of Yi Tian, looking at the large screen in the living room and carelessly shaking the glass in his hand.
Wei Xi was pushed into the house by the person who showed her the way. Ruan Shaonan had his back to her, while on the screen in front of her, a brutal black market boxing match was being broadcast live.
A familiar figure appeared before her eyes, and she could hardly recognise him. His face was covered in blood, and his left eye was swollen shut. He narrowly avoided the opponent’s fierce high sweep, but was knocked to the ring by a sweeping kick from below.
If Wei Xi could speak, if her voice could still be heard, she would have screamed in terror. But she couldn’t scream, and could only watch, watching the person who had risked his life for her bleed profusely in the ring.
Ruan Shaonan sat on the sofa, marveling, ‘He was drugged, but he’s still managed to hold on until now. This Chi Mo is really something.’
Wei Xi felt as if she had been struck by lightning, her heart and mind scattered. She simply couldn’t imagine how someone could be so cold-blooded. When she thought the man in front of her was already cruel and cold-blooded enough, he would always do something even crueler and more cold-blooded to break her bottom line.
Ruan Shaonan stood up and saw Wei Xi looking at him with fear. He smiled gently and said, ‘The other black market fighter is the champion I specially invited from Cambodia. How about it? Was it exciting?’
There was thunderous cheering all around, and Chi Mo’s eyes were vacant and his feet felt like cotton. His opponent wrapped his arms around his head and brought his knees down like an axe. Chi Mo used his gloves to protect his head and barely managed to fend off this almost desperate attack.
“Oh, yes, I forgot to tell you. There is an unwritten rule in Cambodian underground boxing matches: no stopping until death! In your opinion, how long do you think Chi Mo can last?’
Wei Xi was on the verge of collapse. She held out her trembling hands and said to him, ‘What do you want?’
Ruan Shaonan didn’t understand, and Wei Xi remembered that he was not Ling Luochuan. With trembling hands, he took out his small notebook and wrote it down again on the paper.
Ruan Shaonan shook his head and laughed lightly, signalled the others to leave, walked over to Wei Xi, and whispered in her ear, ‘Don’t you know what I want?’
Wei Xi’s lips trembled as she fumbled to take out her phone.
Ruan Shaonan knew who she was going to call, but instead of stopping her, he crossed his arms and looked at her with a inscrutable smile, ‘Go ahead and call him. When you’ve finished, he can come over here and you can explain everything to him. By the time he gets here, everyone on the stage will be dead. You should know that in a black market boxing match, a minute can decide someone’s life or death.’
Wei Xi froze for a moment, looking at Chi Mo, who was covered in blood on the ring. Tears fell down her face like broken strings.
‘Why go to the trouble of looking far away when you can get what you want so close? If you ask me, I’ll say yes,’ said Ruan Shaonan, wrapping his arm around her cold, trembling body, and whispering in her ear in a voice so gentle it was almost seductive. ‘You need to make up your mind quickly. Every minute you think about it, he suffers for another minute.’
Wei Xi turned her face away, looking at the man she had once loved with her whole life through her tear-filled eyes. She really couldn’t understand what his heart was made of. How could he think of such a treacherous and despicable scheme? How could he do it?
Ruan Shaonan wiped the tears from her face with his finger and sighed, ‘Seeing you cry like this, I can’t bear it. But if I let you off today, won’t I have to suffer the pain of longing myself? Weixi, I just want a word from you.”
Grabbing her hair, he sneered down at her, “Yes or no?”
She was forced to look up at him, and the tears on her eyelashes looked like shiny crystals, smashing onto his hand as they dripped down her face. Over his shoulder, she saw Chi Mo on the screen sitting in a chair, resting. One hand was no longer able to move, and his whole face was deformed. The cheerful ringing of the bell sounded again, and it sounded like the death knell to her ears.
She closed her eyes, tears falling like rain, nodded, and said one word in a silent voice: ‘Give…’
The man smiled, kissed her eyelashes, which were wet with tears, and praised her, ‘That’s a good girl.’ He hugged her again, let out a long sigh, and said, ‘Weixi, you don’t know how much I’ve missed you, how much I’ve wanted to…tear you apart.’
Wei Xi’s teeth chattered and she trembled all over, like a bird that had been plucked of all its feathers by a tiger, struggling to death in the tiger’s jaws, but it was better to be dead.
‘Mr. Ling, you can’t go in, Mr. Ling…’
Ling Luochuan kicked the door open with one foot, strode into the room, looked at the bloody fighting on the big screen, and then looked at Wei Xi, who was full of tears. He understood everything in an instant.
He walked over, pulled Wei Xi behind him, looked at Ruan Shaonan coldly and said, ‘It seems you didn’t understand what I meant. Never mind, we still have a long time ahead of us.’
Then he turned his face and said to the woman beside him, ‘Let’s go!’
Wei Xi, however, held onto him, looked at the big screen, and then at Ling Luochuan, as if holding onto a straw.
Ruan Shaonan, however, sat on the sofa, watching all this with a theatrical expression.
This was like pouring oil on the fire. Ling Luochuan could not help but become angry. He looked at her and said, with every word carrying weight, ‘Follow me! Don’t make me say it again!’
Wei Xi was stunned by his fierce tone. At that moment, Chi Mo on the big screen was once again swept to the ground by his opponent in the ring, and thunderous cheers sounded all around.
The Cambodian boxer had reptilian, cold eyes, looking mercilessly at his opponent on the ground, ready to take his life at any moment.
This is what Ling Chi would have looked like.
She could no longer bear it, her knees weak, and she knelt before Ling Luochuan, pulling at the corner of his shirt. Her eyes, full of tears, looked up at him mournfully, pleading with him silently, as if to say, ‘Please, please…’
Ruan Shaonan, who had been sitting on the sofa watching with cold eyes, finally broke out into a smile.
Looking down at the woman kneeling on the ground, begging him desperately, Ling Luochuan was filled with hatred. Taking a deep breath, he shook her hand off and pulled out his phone to dial Wei Chengbao’s number.
As soon as the other end called out ‘Mr. Ling,’ he yelled angrily into the phone, ‘Stop the boxing match immediately! If it’s even a minute late, I’ll make you regret the day you were born!’
Then he hung up the phone, looked at Ruan Shaonan on the sofa, and sneered, ‘You saw what you wanted to see. Are you satisfied now?’
Chapter 50: If you won’t give me your heart, then give me your body
The live broadcast was over, and so was the show. Ruan Shaonan turned off the TV and poured himself a glass of wine. The phone rang, and he answered it. After listening for a while, he smiled, ‘No, it’s not early. He came up at the perfect time, just the right amount of time. You’ve worked hard…’
Ruan Shaonan put the phone down, stood up, and walked to the window to look out at the city. It was here that they had almost come to blows the last time. He remembered her saying, ‘Do you think I could ever love you?’
Everything was a lie at the time, except for the anger. When he heard those words, he wanted to tear her to pieces. No, pieces still have a shape, he wanted to crush her into powder, reduce her to ashes, so that he could feel at ease, comfortable and at peace.
Ruan Shaonan took a deep breath, as if he could still smell her, the smell of tears, from the tip of his nose.
He chuckled softly, ‘You said you would love me forever, until death do us part. But you are still alive, and you have fallen in love with someone else. At first, I thought you were dead, and I let go, but you didn’t die. What am I supposed to do?’
He recalled her kneeling at Ling Luochuan’s feet, looking up at him with a pitiful yet hopeful expression; he remembered the hopeful expression on her face when she saw him rushing into the house, thinking that she could escape…
He sat back in the armchair, closed his eyes and sneered, ‘Did you really think that you could rely on that proud young master with his nose in the air? Then open your eyes wide and take a good look…’ He touched the scab on his lip and said softly into the air, ‘When you’ve seen clearly, you’ll know that in this world, the only person you can rely on… is me.’
If Wei Xi hadn’t called Ru Fei, Chi Mo would have already been sent to the hospital. Although he was seriously injured, he had a good physical foundation and, coupled with his extensive practical experience, knew how to protect himself. Apart from a broken left forearm, he didn’t have any other major injuries.
Wei Xi was relieved, and hung up the phone when Ru Fei said she wanted to stay in the hospital to take care of Chi Mo.
Wei Xi put the phone down, looked at the silent man beside her, and walked over to him. She used sign language to say, ‘Thank you.’
Ling Luochuan didn’t say anything. Wei Xi knew that he was still angry. Everything she had done today had not only made him lose face in front of Ruan Shaonan, but had also seriously hurt his feelings.
Wei Xi wanted to say something to him, but she knew from his cold expression that he wasn’t in the mood to listen.
Wei Xi leaned down and said to him in sign language, ‘I’m sorry, I’ll go first.’
Wei Xi straightened up and walked towards the door. The man, who had been silent until now, grabbed her hand. ‘What’s the rush? We didn’t finish what we were doing yesterday, did we?’
Wei Xi pushed him away, looked at his uncertain face, sighed, took out a small notebook and wrote: ‘I’m really sorry for what happened today. You’re in a bad mood today, so let’s talk about it some other time. If you’re willing to listen to me.’
Wei Xi handed him the note, took a step back, bowed slightly, and said to him in sign language, ‘Thank you for saving him, really thank you.’
Wei Xi turned to leave, but Ling Luochuan dragged her back, and mercilessly threw her onto the sofa. ‘Don’t rush, I have something to say. After I’m done, it’s not too late for you to go back and see him.’
Wei Xi knew that she would not be able to escape today, no matter what. The man had it all planned out, and there was always a storm waiting for her. So she nodded and said to him in sign language, ‘Go ahead, I’m listening.’
Ling Luochuan sat down on the coffee table opposite and stared at her. Only when he was close did Wei Xi realise that the veins on his forehead were bulging and throbbing. He was so angry that he was barely holding himself back from exploding.
Even so, Wei Xi felt nervous, as if she was not facing a man who deeply loved her, but an angry panther, ready to tear her throat with its sharp fangs at any moment.
Seeing her fear, Ling Luochuan smiled and reached out to touch her cold side face. ‘If you have no evil intentions, what are you afraid of? Are you lying to me? From the beginning, did you just want to use me? From beginning to end, you never had the slightest bit of sincerity for me? Tell me, Weixi, is that what you are like?”
His eyes bore into her, and Weixi met his maniacal gaze, shaking her head, “No.”
Ling Luochuan nodded, ’Good, I believe you. Now, go back and see him. Don’t worry, he won’t die anytime soon. But…it’s hard to say about the future.’
Weixi panicked. She wanted to say something, but Ling Luochuan grabbed her hand. ‘You should have thought of this when you were on your knees begging me today. You never beg, but you can go to such lengths for him. You value him so highly that you’re even willing to sacrifice your dignity. And I, touching you even once, makes you feel sick and intolerable. How could I possibly keep someone so dangerous? ’How can I let others sleep peacefully when I’m on the same bed? Why don’t you understand this reasoning?
Wei Xi looked at him in fear. He had a smile on the corner of his mouth, but his beautiful eyes seemed to be frozen. She wanted to say something to him with her hands or a pen, but he didn’t give her the chance to speak.
He squeezed her chin and smiled coldly, ‘You can’t speak now, and even if you could, I wouldn’t want to hear it. I just want to tell you that he is dead. Ruan Shaonan doesn’t want him dead, but I won’t let him go either. The one who got him killed was none other than you, and it was your own cleverness that got him into trouble. My poor Weixi, tell me, why did you lie to me if you were fine? You made me lose my mind and dance around every day for you. In the end, it was all for nothing. No! It’s my fault. I should have told you earlier what happened to the people who deceived me, right?’
‘I know very well Luo Chuan’s temper. If it comes to ruthlessness and cunning, I give him three points.”
Thinking of Ruan Shaonan’s words, she subconsciously resisted the man who was holding her. However, he grabbed her shoulders and lifted her up, slamming her against the backrest of the sofa.
The backrest was soft, but she was still dizzy from the impact. Wei-xi gasped for breath, but Ling Luochuan stuck his hand around her throat and looked at her amusedly, ‘What are you afraid of? I’m not going to do anything to you. Who am I to love you so much, so madly, so uncontrollably, that everyone is waiting to see me make a fool of myself? As it turned out, he really did see it, so are you satisfied?’
Wei Xi looked at him. A heart that had long since cracked was shattered into pieces by his cold words.
She didn’t want to cry, she had cried too much already, but the tears just couldn’t stop falling. Her lips moved, and at that moment she wished so much that she could speak, but she couldn’t. Perhaps it would be useless even if she did.
The smiling man in front of her was full of suspicion and anger towards him, and he didn’t want to hear her explanation at all. Even if he did, he wouldn’t believe it, he only believed what he saw.
Ruan Shaonan, Weixi had to admit that he knew Ling Luochuan too well, and he knew her too well. He knew their weak points and even knew what to do to completely destroy her.
“Everything he did today was to see us like this, why can’t you understand?’
Wei Xi said this wordlessly, but unfortunately the man holding her didn’t want to see it and couldn’t understand it.
He sighed, ‘Although I really like the way you cry, always so miserable and sad, as long as it can make you smile, I would hate to die for you. But if you use this trick too much, it won’t work.’
He pressed his forehead against hers, his low voice tinged with desire, ‘You don’t want him to die, do you? You don’t have to kneel down, you have something better than that. You know, I think about it day and night, I can’t rest. You know how much I want it. If you won’t give me your heart, then give me your body. You said that even if you died, you wouldn’t have sex with someone you didn’t love. But you’ll do anything for him, won’t you?’
He picked her up and looked at her tear-stained face, sneering, ‘Don’t pretend to be pitiful with me. You were not the first time. I don’t think I need to be polite. You can handle it.’
After entering the bedroom, he turned on the CD and turned up the volume to the maximum. The explosive dance music resounded throughout the villa, shaking the night, shattering the stars, and also shattering the heart of a person into pieces and reducing it to ashes…
Chapter 51: Goodbye, Luo Chuan
The next morning, when Ling Luochuan woke up in his bedroom, there was no one around him, only a piece of paper covered in writing.
The delicate handwriting was messy, and it was not hard to tell what kind of complicated and chaotic state the person who wrote it was in at the time.
In the morning, he read it for a long time, word by word, over and over again, quietly contemplating it over and over again. Finally, he crumpled the thin piece of paper into a ball, clenched it in his hand, and could not let go for a long time.
I’m sorry, I couldn’t wait for you to wake up and tell you all this face to face. I’ve run out of strength. I spent last night by your side, crying all night. But I know you don’t care anymore. We’ve come to this, and it’s really not what I had in mind. Now that I think about it, maybe I shouldn’t blame you. I was naive to think that two people with such different identities, statuses, backgrounds and experiences could stay together without any problems. You are a very proud person, and your life has been too perfect, without experiencing any real adversity or setbacks, so you will never understand what kind of world people like us have to face every day. You will never be able to appreciate the kind of feelings that transcend friendship, love, family, and even a willingness to risk one’s life, that I have for Chi Mo. You haven’t experienced it, so you won’t understand.
Ling Luochuan looked up when she saw this, and looked out the window at the sunshine.
It was a fine day. But when Wei Xi left, it was just before dawn in the east. On her way to the bus stop, she saw a plastic mannequin that had been abandoned in a rubbish corner. It was naked, its limbs separated, its head lying on the ground, its eyes staring straight at her. She walked over and put the lifeless doll back together bit by bit, and then put her scarf around her neck.
At that moment, the sun came out and the warm sunshine illuminated their faces. Wuxi looked at her, smiling, but slowly her eyes turned red. She used sign language to say to her, ‘You are very beautiful, don’t be sad…’
In fact, even if the world is like this for men and women in love like us, we can still prevent tragedies from recurring. Unfortunately, you still hurt me, very deeply. Perhaps, from the beginning to the present, the goddess of fate has never really favoured us. Just as in our first encounter, you came with an ulterior motive and made me suffer abuse. So the heavens decreed that we would have fate but no luck in this life.
With a crash, Ling Luochuan smashed the glass of the French window with the cup in his hand. The French window cracked into a messy pattern, like his broken heart.
No matter what, I still want to thank you for saving his life. He is really very important, more important than my life. In fact, I have a lot to say to you about him, about my experiences over the past six months, and about the world I live in. But now, it’s better if I don’t say anything. If you only believe what you want to believe, what’s the point of me saying any more? I just hope that you can see the little bit of guilt you felt for me and let him go, let me go, and let yourself go too.
‘Some say that the hearts of people in this city have rotted, but I still have expectations for it. Just as I have always believed, there are many paths in this world. Some look simple, but they are one-way roads with no return. Some look difficult, but after walking through the thorns, they are smooth paths. Ruan Shaonan has chosen an easy path. In him, I can no longer see the slightest trace of humanity. But I sincerely hope that you will not be like that. I always believe that beneath your cold and gorgeous appearance, you still have an unspoiled kind heart and innocent feelings. If, again, this is my naive self-righteousness, then I have nothing to say. But please remember what I said to you in the Thai restaurant. If one day, I really reach a point where I cannot help myself, I will not cherish my life.
Ling Luochuan still laughed, almost to the point of tears, and kept saying, ‘Hello, you’re so nice…’
In this world, there are too many people who, without meaning to, say goodbye and are truly never seen again. There are too many injuries that appear without meaning to, but bring irreparable mistakes. The last thing I want to say to you is that I will remember everything that happened last night for the rest of my life. So, Luochuan, goodbye…
‘Hey, girl, wake up, the bus has arrived.’ Someone nudged Weixi.
Weixi opened her eyes and saw that the bus had already arrived at the stop. She had fallen asleep and seemed to have had a long, long dream. Now, the dream had ended…
After getting off the bus, she found a pharmacy nearby and went in. The clerk asked her what she wanted to buy, and she wrote on a piece of paper, ’The morning-after pill.’
She clutched the hem of her shirt tightly and her face was as pale as snow.
The shop assistant looked at her and handed them to her. After paying, Wei Xi walked out with the pills and bought a cup of hot coffee from the supermarket next door.
She knew that the coffee could not be delivered with the medicine. But at this moment, she really didn’t want to drink something cold. The whole city was basking in the sun, and she alone was cold as ice.
Sitting on a bus stop bench, staring silently at the bustling street, Weixi threw the pills into her coffee one by one. There was no sugar in the coffee, but she didn’t find it bitter. Perhaps, having experienced so much, her nerves were on the verge of numbness.
He is a man who will stop at nothing, and she cannot afford to leave herself with any loose ends.
Recalling the scene six months ago, she pinches the paper cup in her hand until it is deformed. She tells herself, ‘You were right, you absolutely must not repeat the same mistake again.’
She raises her face and smiles at the sky, suddenly feeling really ridiculous. They say that no one can trip over the same rope twice. She has fallen countless times, but still refuses to turn back until she hits a wall.
She remembered the four words she had written to Ling Luochuan that night when he had walked her home: ‘A new dawn after the storm’.
She had thought that it was the hope of a new life. But she had reached the end of the road and it was just the cycle of life all over again. A different beginning, but the same ending.
She had finished the coffee but the pill had sunk to the bottom of the cup. She picked it out and swallowed it. Then she suddenly remembered that she was still wearing the jade unicorn he had given her around her neck.
The unicorn is a mythical beast that wards off evil spirits. You should wear it well in the future. Even if I’m not by your side, I can rest assured that it will protect you.
Don’t pretend to look pitiful with me. Now you’re complaining about everything. Yesterday, you still wanted to sleep with me, didn’t you? You’re not the first time. I don’t need to be polite, I can see that you can handle it.
She had already decided not to cry anymore. What was the point? It only made her look pathetic. But the tears just kept flowing.
She put her legs, which had already lost consciousness, on the chair, hugged herself tightly, and shrunk into a small ball. Hypnotically, she kept saying, ‘I don’t hurt, I don’t hurt, I don’t hurt at all…’
Ruan Shaonan sat in the car and watched from afar. He had followed her all the way from when she left Ling Luochuan’s villa.
‘Mr Ruan, should we go over and take a look? I’m afraid something’s happened to Miss Lu…’ The driver couldn’t help but ask his boss, feeling sorry for the girl in front of them.
Ruan Shaonan looked over there indifferently, turned his face to look ahead, and said flatly, ‘No need. Let’s go.’
Chapter 52: Won everything, but lost the world
Chi Mo’s body recovered quickly. If he hadn’t laughed at him, he would have thought he was a wild animal, born and raised in the wild. Even without medicine, he could recover on his own.
Wei Xi became even more silent at school than before. She had difficulty speaking, and she already had few friends. Coupled with the fact that Xiao Fan was busy studying abroad, she seemed even more lonely.
Ling Luochuan never came to see her again. Perhaps he had already forgotten her. After all, there were so many beautiful people in the world, and she was just one of the many. He had many other beautiful women to choose from, and she was just one of the many. It was no big deal if he forgot her.
She distanced herself from those people and things, and her heart gradually calmed down. She had no time and no right to indulge herself in love and fall into melancholy. Graduation was approaching, and she had no choice but to make every second count.
Chi Mo once said that survival itself is a victory.
Although this statement smacked of self-comfort, it was her greatest motivation at this time. She is still alive, isn’t she? Although she has suffered so much humiliation, hurt, blow, and ridicule. But she is still alive, and that is enough.
Chi Mo was very worried about her. Although when Wei Xi visited him in the hospital, he had applied thick concealer on his neck and wrists, he could still not escape his sharp eyes.
However, she didn’t want to talk about it. Chi Mo, who knew her disposition, how could he make things difficult for her? He could only keep this matter in his heart like a stone.
Time passed quickly, and before he knew it, there was only one day left until the Mid-Autumn Festival. Although Chi Mo’s broken leg had not healed, he could recuperate at home. In order to go home for the holiday, he decided to be discharged from the hospital early that morning.
Wei Xi had a class and did not come to pick him up. If he had not gone to go through the discharge procedures, but when she had finished everything and returned to the ward to find him. Chi Mo, who had not yet recovered from his broken leg, was already gone.
This is a French restaurant, and there is usually a long queue waiting for a table. Today, however, there was no one in the restaurant except for one table of guests. The reason was that the guest at the table had booked the whole restaurant.
Ruan Shaonan looked at the man sitting opposite him, whose arm was in a cast, and smiled, ‘It seems that you have recovered well.’
Chi Mo looked coldly at the energetic Ruan Shaonan. He remembered that he was clearly still in the hospital ward just now, but when he opened his eyes again, he was already here.
This is not the way a proper businessman should behave. He couldn’t help but feel a little scared. The man opposite him was like a deep pool, and the water in this pool was so deep that it was almost unfathomable.
‘Mr. Ruan didn’t bring me here to welcome me, did he?”
Ruan Shaonan chuckled lightly, took a bite of steak, chewed slowly, and then elegantly wiped his mouth. “Of course not. I want to do some business with you.”
Chi Mo couldn’t help but laugh. ’What do you want to buy from me, Mr. Ruan? Wei Xi? I’m sorry, she and I are not in that kind of relationship. She belongs only to herself. You’ve got the wrong idea.’
Ruan Shaonan lifted his glass, shook his head and looked at him, ‘Of course I know, you two aren’t in a relationship. If you were, do you think you’d still be alive?’
Chi Mo’s expression hardened, and Ruan Shaonan continued, ‘What I want to buy is silence. Weixi needs a quiet environment to think things through. I don’t want anyone to disturb her, so I’ll give you a sum of money, enough for you to spend the rest of your life. Go as far away as you can, and don’t come back to bother her. You should know that you are not always so lucky to have someone kneel down and beg for you. And not every time, her kneeling down is useful, it depends on who she kneels down to.‘
Chi Mo suddenly understood everything, his right hand clenched into a fist. Ruan Shaonan saw the veins on his forehead bulge out and couldn’t help but smile.
’Mr. Chi, if I were you, I would not act rashly. You are not the only one who has been a black market boxer. That said, I don’t need to do it myself to deal with you.”
Chi Mo looked at the condescending face with a smirk, ’Mr. Ruan, I’ve actually always been curious about you. The more I get to know Weixi, the more I’m curious about you. I’ve always wanted to know what kind of person could treat her that way. At an auction, he spent millions just to save face, and then he just stood there and watched as his woman went without medical treatment, fell into debt, and ended up on the streets. He himself eats delicacies every meal, but she doesn’t even have the money to buy painkillers. Seeing you today, I finally understand. It turns out that you are nothing but a beast in human clothing. I really feel sorry for Weixi. Back then, she gave up the opportunity to study abroad for nothing because of a lie you told casually, and she even went to Sifang Temple on her knees, one step at a time, from the foot of the mountain to pray for your blessings. Can you imagine? There were 999 steps, and it was winter, with heavy snow. She almost fainted on those damned steps. In order to give you a satisfactory birthday present, she didn’t want to ask you for money, but she wanted to make you happy, so she took out all the money she had earned with great difficulty. In the end, she was still short of 1,000 yuan. ‘Chi Mo paused, and spat out a few words, ’That was the money she made from selling blood…’
Suddenly, he picked up the table full of wine glasses, waved them around, and splashed them all over Ruan Shaonan’s shocked face, scolding him fiercely, ‘Has your fucking conscience been eaten by a dog?!’
The people standing on either side of him were about to make a move, but Ruan Shaonan raised his hand to stop them. The scarlet liquid ran down his cheeks, like two lines of red tears.
However, before Chi Mo could finish, he looked at the rich and meticulous man across the table and sneered, ‘You are no better than those streetwalkers in the red light district. A prostitute betrays herself, but you betrayed a woman who was willing to give birth to your children, die for you, and do anything for you. When you were surrounded by women on the left and right, did you ever think about the kind of abuse she had suffered? When you were at the peak of your success, did you ever think that you were also stepping on her bones? What? Regret it now? You think if you get rid of everyone around her, she’ll come back to you? Don’t even dream about it! Heaven is watching what you do! You’ve done so many things that hurt people and harm the world, there will definitely be retribution. I’ll just wait for that day!”
Chi Mo stood up and left. The people on both sides looked at their boss and saw him slowly wiping the wine on his face with a napkin, waving his hand expressionlessly and saying, “Let him go.”
Chi Mo didn’t look at him again and turned around to leave.
Ruan Shaonan turned his face and looked at the scenery outside the window. The streets of the city were still busy and bustling, with people coming and going in a hurry. For the first time, he realised that this was a city full of sadness. The people in the city were all pawns who had crossed the river, gone without return, broken into pieces, and there was no possibility of turning back.
Perhaps one day, we will all realise this. Everything we have worked so hard to get is simply not important. And the thing we want most has been out of our reach forever…
Forever?
He closed his eyes and felt himself being exiled from the darkness into the light, unable to see the past or the future.
If you close your eyes and can’t see the city, how can you tell what’s real and what’s not? If you close your heart and can’t see the future, where is hope?
Just as many years ago, he saw his love for her, only that at the time, he didn’t know how strong that love was. He thought that desire and hatred could overturn the world, but forgot that the world was for her.
She was his world, and he had won everything but lost the world.
In the afternoon, when he returned to the office, Ruan Shaonan continued to work as if nothing had happened. The intercom rang, and his secretary said, ‘Mr Ruan, Miss Gu is here.’
He raised an eyebrow and said, ‘Send her in.’
A moment later, Gu Yongling walked in with a graceful gait in her high heels. Ruan Shaonan stood up very gentlemanly and smiled as he greeted her.
Gu Yongling smiled gently and said, ‘Mr. Ruan, am I disturbing you?’
‘No, I’d love to have you.’ Ruan Shaonan pulled her to sit down, and the secretary poured tea and then withdrew.
‘What, is there something you need?’
‘Yes, tomorrow is the Mid-Autumn Festival, I want to ask you, do you have any plans?’
‘Tomorrow is the Mid-Autumn Festival?’ Ruan Shaonan looked at the calendar and nodded, ‘It really is.’
‘Yes, it’s a rare reunion once a year, and you’re such a busy person that you’ve even forgotten such an important holiday.‘
Ruan Shaonan smiled and said, “I’ve been a bit chaotic lately.”
Gu Yongling tentatively asked, “Is there something wrong at work?”
Ruan Shaonan put his arm around his fiancée’s shoulders and said tenderly, “Don’t worry, I can handle it. It’s just a pity that I won’t be able to accompany you tomorrow.”
’That’s okay, you go about your business, I’ll find my own entertainment.’
Gu Yongling turned to leave, but Ruan Shaonan suddenly stopped her. ‘Oh yes, Yongling, do you remember where you put the DV we bought on our last trip to Japan?’
‘In the cupboard in the study. Why?’
Ruan Shaonan kissed her forehead and said, ‘Nothing. Thank you, Yongling, and I wish you a happy holiday in advance. Tomorrow…will definitely be a happy day.’
After Gu Yongling left, Ruan Shaonan sat in a chair and looked at the calendar. Tomorrow was the Mid-Autumn Festival. If he could be reunited with his loved ones, even if it wasn’t perfect, he would have no regrets.
The phone rang again, it was Wang Dongyang.
“Mr. Ruan, I’ve found out what you asked me to find out. Ms. Gu has indeed lost a lot of money in stocks and futures recently, and I’m afraid she won’t be able to hold on much longer. The Fu Huang head office will hold her accountable sooner or later.’
Ruan Shaonan looked at his computer and asked, ‘What else?’
‘She recently met Nie Donghua, the CEO of Donghua.’
Ruan Shaonan smiled and said, ‘You’ve done a good job. Keep feeding her false information until tomorrow when our bidding with Donghua ends.’
“Okay, Mr. Ruan, I know what to do. Then what should we do with Ms. Gu after the bidding ends?’
Ruan Shaonan took out the newly purchased asthma medicine, looked at it in the sunlight, and said lightly, ‘We don’t need to do anything. She sold false information to Donghua and took their money, but caused them to lose a huge amount of business. Nie Donghua will not let her go.’
‘I understand.’
After Ruan Shaonan put down the phone, he told his secretary, ‘In the future, do not answer Miss Gu’s phone calls. Also, tell the doorman downstairs not to let her come up.’
After taking care of all the trivial matters, Ruan Shaonan stood up and looked down at the bustling street market below. Gu Yongling’s betrayal did not affect his good mood at all as he welcomed the holiday.
He turned around and found the gift that Wei Xi had left at the villa in a drawer that he had not even opened, and opened it. The silver-white lighter shined with a white light in the sun, and the light was so dazzling that his vision became blurry.
He looked at it, his heart aching with pain. This silly girl had taken his casual joke seriously.
He held the Saturn lighter in the palm of his hand, as if he were holding the entire world, a world that belonged only to him.
He had walked all the way through this filthy world, feeding on the mud and keeping company with the beasts. He had thought that he had long since cultivated a body of bronze and iron, turning every scale on his body into a blade, and that he would not be merciful to anyone, wavering and reluctant to stay.
But only today did he realise: in this world, there will be someone for whom you have betrayed everything, someone for whom you have let down your guard, someone for whom you owe everything, but none of this is comparable to the fact that you are no longer the only one for her.
Kissing the meaningful gift lightly, he pressed it to his chest and said, ‘Weixi, the only person in this world who can make me sad is you. So, you must come back!’
Chapter 53: Full of murderous intent
The next day was a holiday. Ru Fei and Wei Xi moved to a dilapidated bungalow near the foot of a mountain in the suburbs with their simple luggage. The house was borrowed by Chi Mo from a friend. It was left behind by his grandmother and was considered ancestral property. There was very little human activity around, and the raised grave mounds on the mountains were hidden in the trees and faintly visible.
‘Did Chi Mo say why we moved?’ Wei Xi put down the phone and asked Ru Fei in sign language.
Rufei said while making the bed: ‘Women in the red light district should know when to ask questions and when to keep quiet. I think it’s time for us to keep quiet and support him silently. Don’t you agree?’
Weixi smiled and didn’t ask anything else. The two of them packed up and were already sweating from the effort.
Rufei said, ‘Are you hungry? I’ll go buy some food. I guess he’ll be back in a little while.’
“Will he be okay?’
‘He’s just borrowing some money from a friend, so he’ll be fine. Don’t worry.’
Ru Fei double-checked the door lock before leaving. She walked quickly, always feeling like someone was following her. She stopped and looked back, but couldn’t see a single suspicious person.
She was just being paranoid.
This place was so desolate and hidden, it was impossible for Ruan Shaonan to find it so quickly. But Ru Fei couldn’t help but wonder, if Ruan Shaonan was really that powerful, how long could they hide Weixi like this?
Weixi doesn’t know anything yet, but after the holiday is over, she will have to go back to school. At that time, how are they going to protect her?
Ruifei almost wants to sigh, a good Mid-Autumn Festival has been wasted moving around like they’re on the run. This is a contest of unequal strength, and they’re already exhausted before they’ve even officially opened for business.
If it weren’t for the village store selling mineral water, instant noodles and ham, they would have been carrying bags back home. A black car drove towards them, kicking up dust on the dirt road.
If it weren’t for her, it would have brushed past them.
For some reason, she suddenly felt panicked. She subconsciously glanced back, but saw nothing except the dust and the black rear window.
Ruan Shaonan sat in his villa, drinking alone from a table full of fine wine and food. The table was laden with exquisite Huaiyang dishes, all of which Wei Xi liked. There was also a jar of aged daughter red, which he remembered Wei Xi really liked. Last time, she only had a small cup and her face turned red like a little child’s, but her eyes were shining, making her look even more attractive with her bright eyes and white face, more pitiful and lovely than usual.
The moonlight tonight is really beautiful, like soft muslin, like the mellow wine in the glass. The feeling of being slightly drunk makes one’s heart at peace and content, and one is faint with drunkenness.
The man, holding a wine glass, looked at the person asleep like a kitten on the sofa, and laughed heartily. He stood up, walked over, picked up the person on the sofa, and held her in his arms, letting her pale face rest against his chest, and whispered, ‘My little Weixi, you’ve finally come back.’
If she hadn’t followed Chi Mo, she would have snuck into ‘Perfect Beauty’ through the back door. Once inside, she rushed towards the VIP box.
Chi Mo grabbed her and said, ‘You can’t do that. There are people guarding the outside of the box area. I’m afraid you’ll be kicked out before you even get anywhere near him.’
If she hadn’t been so anxious, she would have fallen to tears. She took Chi Mo’s hand and said, ‘What should we do? It’s all my fault. I went out to buy something. If anything happens to her, it’s better if I die.’
Chi Mo took a deep breath and told herself not to panic. There was always a way out.
‘How about this, Ling Luochuan’s drinks have always been in the care of Youyou. That girl used to get along well with you guys, so let’s ask her for help. I’ll go over there now and try to get her to come out. You go to the dressing room and wait. When I bring her here, you guys can change clothes and you can go in for her. When you see him, don’t panic. Find an opportunity to explain things clearly. Even if he doesn’t help, at least tell us where Ruan Shaonan can take Wei Xi.’
If not, he quickly nodded, and then remembered something else, so he hurriedly stopped him and said, ‘Don’t go and get her, ask someone else to go instead. Don’t let him see you, because he gets angry when he sees you, and I’m afraid he won’t be willing to help then.’
Chi Mo understood, and Didao left.
If not, while no one was touching, he snuck into the dressing room, and while turning around, he muttered to himself, ‘Weixi, you must wait for me. I’m going to save you now, you mustn’t get hurt, you mustn’t!’
Wei Xi sat on a chair, looking across the table of food at the man opposite her, feeling a sense of hopelessness.
She really didn’t understand why he just wouldn’t let her go, when he had already messed up her life so badly. Why did he still say things like compensation, love, and that he couldn’t live without her?
Did he not know about the suffering she had endured half a year ago, the experiences that were worse than death?
Even if he didn’t know, he was clearly aware of the pain he had inflicted on her. How can he still sit in front of her so casually, talking to her so freely and with such conviction?
There is nothing she can do…
Ruan Shaonan still smiles elegantly and decently. This is just how he is. Even when he is devouring his prey, he will not let a single drop of blood stain the corners of his mouth.
Thinking about this, Wei Xi felt a coldness rising from the pit of her stomach. She lowered her head and wrote on the paper, ‘Mr. Ruan, I think I have made myself clear enough. Please let me leave.’
Ruan Shaonan wiped his mouth with a napkin, looked at the bowls and chopsticks in front of Wei Xi, and said softly, ‘You haven’t eaten anything yet! These are all your old favourites. I specially asked Mrs Wang to come back and cook them for you. Won’t you try some?’
The man in front of her was tender and affectionate, seemingly a different person from the terrifying man from the rainy night, but she was still scared.
Wei Xi calmed down and wrote on the paper, ‘What you liked in the past, you may not like now. Mr. Ruan, since I was injured half a year ago, my tastes have changed a lot, and these no longer suit my appetite. If you’ve finished talking, please let me go.’
Ruan Shaonan smiled, and something flashed in his eyes, like a shooting star across the dark night sky, fleeting. He didn’t know how many times he had truly cried in his life, but this time he knew: if he cried, the tears would definitely be real.
But would she believe it?
She wouldn’t, as he could tell from the look in her eyes.
When he was a child, he heard stories about mythical creatures with human bodies and fish tails who could spin water into silk and turn tears into pearls. He was not such a creature, and he could not turn his own tears into pearls to convince her that it was true.
He was just the child in the fable who cried wolf. The child lost his life. Those who lie will always be punished, and his punishment had come.
He had lost something more precious than his life. He had lost her, and he could never get her back.
When you have something, you don’t cherish it; when you cherish it, you can no longer have it.
That was his retribution.
He folded his arms on the table and looked at her, trying to make a last-ditch effort. ‘Weixi, can you give me one more chance, just one?’
Looking at the man’s seemingly sincere expression, Weixi shook her head and wrote on the paper, ‘Give you another chance? Mr. Ruan, what about me? You have avenged yourself, killed the people you wanted to kill, watched the show you wanted to watch, got everything you wanted, and you are satisfied. But what about me? Who will do me justice? Who will do justice to the two children in the Lu family? Mr. Ruan, you owe me a voice and two lives. You haven’t paid it back yet, so how can you give me a chance?”
The man was silent for a moment, staring intently. ’I can make amends for you, with my whole life, if you just believe me, Weixi, just trust me once more, just once, okay?’
Wei Xi looked at him and then wrote: ‘I’m sorry, I really can’t do it. You are too clever and inscrutable. I can’t tell when you are being genuine and when you are not. Mr. Ruan, I am really afraid of you. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life in fear, living every day in a world of lies where I can’t tell what is real and what is not. I don’t want to spend my days in fear. If you really still care about our past friendship, please let me go and let me live my own life.’
Ruan Shaonan smiled after reading it, and after a long moment of contemplation, he said coldly, ‘What about Ling Luochuan? How is he different from me? Why can you accept him, but not accept me again?’
What is the difference between them? This is a good question.
‘In fact, you are really very similar. You are both domineering and basically care nothing for other people’s lives. The difference is that he feels guilty, can’t bear to see people suffer, admits his mistakes and reflects on himself. Even after the damage is done, these are just things he does to make amends. If you really want to say there is a difference, perhaps it is that he said ‘I’m sorry’ to me.”
Ruan Shaonan put down his napkin, stood up, walked over to Weixi, looked down at her from an equal perspective and said, ’If that’s all, I would have…’
‘And another thing is, he would never use a knife to kill someone, and he would never, to achieve his goal, provoke another man to torment and bully me.”
Looking at his surprised eyes, Wei Xi took a deep breath and wrote, trembling: ’I know that you never thought I would take revenge on you. That night, you deliberately set up a situation to make him suspect me. I also guessed that you had long anticipated how he would treat me. You just wanted me to hate him, to detest him, and to stay away from him for the rest of my life. Perhaps you hoped even more that he would hate me and never want to see me again. The truth is, you succeeded. He suspected me and said many nasty things to me. You knew us so well that you anticipated every move we made. Unfortunately, despite all your careful planning, there was one thing you missed: the human heart.
Wei-xi wrote some more, and after reading it, Ruan Shaonan crumpled it up and stamped on it.
She wrote: ‘That night, he didn’t do anything. When he saw me crying, he felt sorry for me. He was also angry at you for provoking him, so he spent the whole night in the bedroom, raging. He smashed everything in the house that he could find, except for me. Later, he smashed the wall lamp with a vase. I was right under the lamp, and he used his body to block me, so he got a lot of broken glass on his back. We went to the hospital, where the fragments were removed. He didn’t want to stay in the hospital. We went back to the villa, where he kept drinking. When he got drunk, he fell headlong onto the bed and never woke up again. So we spent the night like that. He would rather hurt himself than hurt me. So it’s a pity, Mr. Ruan, that you’ve done a bad thing for nothing this time. I was indeed a little disappointed by his suspicion, but with you, I’m left with nothing but despair.’
Ruan Shaonan looked at her for a moment, and then gave a cold smile. ‘That morning, you knew I was following you, so you played along and deliberately bought medicine to show me, deliberately putting on a pitiful appearance. I was actually fooled by you, you’re really something.’
He suddenly grabbed her by the lapel and dragged her over. ‘What I want to know now is, since you made him sound so good, why did you leave him? Were you really disappointed in him, or did you know in your heart that he couldn’t beat me and you wanted to protect him?’
Seeing her frightened and uncertain eyes, Ruan Shaonan smiled coldly, ‘You want to protect him.’
He grabbed her throat with one hand, his cold eyes showing no emotion. ‘You shouldn’t be so stubborn, and you shouldn’t know me so well. I’m also desperate about you. Just as you said, I’m very clever, and I can do anything without a single slip-up, even if it means murder and arson. So even if you die here today, no one can save you.’
He leaned in close to her ear and grinned coldly, ‘I can kill you right now, without anyone knowing. Do you believe me?’
Xi Xi was almost suffocating from his strangulation, and looked at him with difficulty, her lips moving silently as she spoke, ‘I believe you! But even if you rip out my heart… there is no you in it!’
Chapter 54: In Deep Water and Fiery Fire
If it weren’t for the fact that Ruo Fei had changed her clothes, she would have walked into Ling Luochuan’s box with her head down, carrying a tray of wine.
As usual, the music was deafening, the lighting was dim, and the smell was rotten. If she hadn’t looked around after entering, she would have seen the person she was looking for sitting in the middle of the room, surrounded by admirers, flirting with the lady sitting next to him.
If was in a hurry, but she didn’t dare to act rashly. Just then, someone asked for a drink, so she went over to fill a glass. When she walked up to Ling Luochuan, she smelled the pungent smell of alcohol and realised that he had already drunk quite a lot.
If she couldn’t hold back any longer, she half-kneeled down and whispered, ‘Mr. Ling…’
Ling Luochuan, who was surrounded by red and green, turned his face, looked at her, and laughed, ‘Why is it you?’
‘Mr. Ling, I…’
Just as Ru Fei was about to say something, someone immediately recognised her and laughed, ‘Isn’t this Ru Fei? How long has it been since we last saw each other? I’ve been thinking about you.’
Ru Fei secretly called out, ‘This is bad.’ Sure enough, one of the maids ducked and went out. Ru Fei knew that she was going to go and find the guards.
Time was running out, so she grabbed Ling Luochuan’s sleeve and shouted, ‘Mr Ling, please help Weixi.’
Ling Luochuan held his wine glass, narrowed his eyes and glanced at her, then asked nonchalantly, ‘What’s wrong with her?’
‘Ruan Shaonan…’ Ru Fei’s words were cut short as she was grabbed by a burly man, who dragged her out without saying a word.
She struggled while shouting, ‘Ling Luochuan, Ruan Shaonan has taken Weixi. If you don’t go save her, she’ll die.’
The music was loud, and Ling Luochuan was groggy and could only vaguely hear a few words. When he heard the two words ‘Weixi,’ it was a taboo that could not even be mentioned.
He heard a clang, and he threw his wine glass forcefully onto the screen, yelling angrily, ‘Whether she lives or dies, what does it matter to me?’
Ling Luochuan waved his hand impatiently, and the guards took Ruifei’s arm and dragged her away.
Ruifei cried out desperately, sobbing, ‘Mr. Ling, please, save her. Ruan Shaonan won’t let her go, and if you don’t save her, she’ll really die. Don’t you like her very much? Just consider it a good deed, Mr. Ling, Mr. Ling…’
She cried out like a criminal being taken to the execution ground, her cries terrifying everyone. The man sitting next to her had a cold stare, but it was glued to her pretty face and delicate curves.
Someone leaned over and whispered in Ling Luochuan’s ear, ‘Young Master Ling, this girl used to be here like a thorny rose, something you could look at but not touch. Now she’s crying and grovelling, looking so pitiful that I feel sorry for her. Why don’t you stay and let’s have some fun?’
Ling Luochuan held a wine glass, already drunk and hot-headed, his arm resting on the back of the sofa. Without looking, he casually replied, ‘Help yourselves.’
Ruan Shaonan looked at the woman in his hands, and saw the look in her eyes as if she was ready to die. He smiled and slowly let go of her hand.
Such a beautiful moment, but it had to be marred by the fact that they were apart. It was clear that life was full of disappointments.
He let out a relieved laugh and poured her a small glass of amber-coloured daughter red, saying, ‘This is a treasure from the cellar that is 18 years old. I remember that the first time we had dinner, you really liked it. After this glass, we will go our separate ways.”
Wei-xi looked at him without moving, and Ruan Shaonan shook his head and laughed lightly, saying, ’I understand the principle that you can’t get back what’s been spilled. As I said, we parted on good terms. From then on, we have nothing to do with each other in marriage, funerals, or weddings. Isn’t this what you want?’
Ruan Shaonan poured himself a drink and raised his glass, asking her, ‘Weixi, I wish you happiness.’
Weixi saw him drink it in one go and then lifted her glass to her lips. She set it down and wrote on a piece of paper, ‘Thank you for dinner.’
Ruan Shaonan nodded, and Weixi turned towards the door. Ruan Shaonan poured himself another drink and, with eyes that were incredibly tender, smiled as he watched her leave.
Wei Xi held onto the stair railing, shook her head, and the stairs in front of her twisted into colourful lines, as if they were an endless abyss. She looked despairingly at the ceiling above her, and it swirled.
She leaned against the wall and slowly slid to the ground, watching the man inch closer to her face. Her face was covered in sweat, and she wrote crookedly in her small notebook, ‘What did you give me to drink?’
‘Ketamine, an anaesthetic invented in the 1970s and 1980s in the United States and used in the Vietnam War. Nowadays, however, people prefer to call it ‘K powder’. It is colourless and tasteless, easily soluble in water, and can paralyse you in a very short time. I know you are a careful person. You would never drink without seeing me do it, so I smeared it on your glass.’
Wei Xi looked at him in shock, her heart pounding, trembling as she wrote on the paper, ‘What do you want?’
Ruan Shaonan lifted her chin and gave those trembling lips a gentle kiss, ‘What do you think?’
Wei Xi waved his hand away with difficulty and wrote, ‘Don’t even dream about it, I’ll just pretend it was a dog bite.’
Ruan Shaonan lifted her face. ‘Of course that’s not enough. But what if I record our lovemaking and post it online? What do you think of that?’
Wei Xi looked at him in disbelief, her teeth chattering and her whole body trembling from the viciousness of this plot. With her last ounce of strength, she wrote on the paper, ‘Don’t forget, you’re in it too. I’m a nobody, but you’re someone. If this scandal gets out, your life won’t be easy either.’
Ruan Shaonan looked at her with a smile, pinched her chin, and said, ‘Silly girl, how can you compare with me? I’m a man, and I’m powerful. I can make the media say whatever I want them to say, and I can make them say whatever I want them to say. If I just say one thing to the outside world, that you seduced me, you won’t be able to explain yourself no matter how many mouths you have. Besides, my public welfare image has always been good, so even if there is one more love affair, everyone will soon forget about it.’
He lowered his voice and whispered in her ear, ‘But what about you? You’ll be condemned by thousands and reviled by millions! Do you still want to graduate? Do you still want to establish yourself in this city? Do you still want to be with him? Don’t even think about it. How could a family like his possibly tolerate you? This stain will always follow you, and you’ll never be able to hold your head up for the rest of your life.’
He grabbed her hair fiercely and sneered, ‘Unless you die, I’ll make sure you never forget me!’
‘Snap!’ Wei Xi did her best to slap him, but he easily caught her hand. He tried to pick her up, but Wei Xi struggled, and her fingernails scratched his face. Ruan Shaonan didn’t expect her to still have the strength, and he let go of her hand. Wei Xi fell like a white snowball down the stairs.
Her head hit the ground, and her forehead hit the steps, bleeding. Blood ran down her face, and her vision became blurry.
Footsteps could be heard, getting louder and louder, and drawing ever closer. She tried to move, but her fingers couldn’t generate any strength when they hit the cold floor. Like a bird with broken wings, she was picked up by a pair of strong hands.
She heard him laugh, a very pleased laugh. She didn’t know what he was laughing at, and couldn’t hear what he was saying. She could only feel him unbuttoning her clothes, and then a cold sensation around her neck. She then fell into a dark ocean, engulfed by the cold, and lost consciousness.
If she wasn’t standing in the middle of the box, trembling like a lamb in the midst of wolves, her hands were clenched into fists, like her own tightening heart.
Someone was beginning to get impatient, urging, ‘Take it off, if you take it off, we’ll intercede for you, do you hear?’
Ling Luochuan shook his glass, looking at Ruifei as if she were a stranger. He didn’t care about what was happening in front of him, and just let it happen.
He looked at her malevolently, his burning gaze flashing coldly in the dim light. He thought about Ruifei’s relationship with Weixi, and seeing the same look in their eyes and the same expression on their faces, he couldn’t help but burn with anger.
“What? This is a hardship for you? You should look like a beggar when you beg. Didn’t you say that you felt sick when you saw us? Then today, let us take a good look at you from top to bottom. Let us see what is so noble about you.’
If not, she looked up and saw the full room of people dressed in Jin Hua clothes, nodded and said, ‘Okay, I’ll take it off. Isn’t it what you want to gloat and watch the fun? I’ll just satisfy you.’
She then looked at Ling Luochuan and said, ‘Don’t forget what you just said, I’ll take it off and let you see clearly, and you’ll go save her. But even if you go back on your word, I won’t be surprised. After I’m dead too, I’ll go down and tell her, Lu Weixi, you deserve this end! Who let you be blind and actually believe a heartless beast.”
Ling Luochuan felt a sharp pain, as if he had been pricked by a needle.
If he hadn’t shaken his hand and unbuttoned his shirt one by one, pulling it off to reveal a black, tight-fitting corset, her slender waist and soft contours would have been faintly visible in the dim light. Her tears fell patteringly, ’I would have told her that he doesn’t care about you at all, and that he wishes you were dead. You’re sad and crying for him, and if you die, will he feel sorry for you?‘
Ling Luochuan couldn’t hold back anymore, “That’s enough, you don’t need to take it off.”
If she hadn’t lifted her chin, the thin material of her clothes would have fallen together with her tears onto the scarlet carpet, “I told her that he knew you were suffering, that he knew you were dying a slow death, but he just didn’t care. He even made fun of me…”
’I’ve had enough!’
Ling Luochuan was furious. He stood up and held Ru Fei’s hand that was unbuttoning her shirt. She looked at him angrily, and the tears in her eyes smashed onto his fists. ‘I just told her, Lu Weixi, I feel sorry for you. Why are you still thinking about him? Is it worth it for a man like this?’
Chapter 55: The arch-enemy
When Ling Luochuan arrived at Ruan Shaonan’s villa with the anxious Ru Fei, it was already over.
Ruan Shaonan was sitting neatly on his sofa, holding the jade unicorn that he had torn from Ru Weixi’s neck in the light, examining it closely.
Ling Luochuan walked over and grabbed him, asking, ‘Where is she?’
Ruan Shaonan smiled meaningfully, ‘Of course she’s in my bedroom. I thought you’d come a little earlier, but unfortunately…it’s too late.’
Ling Luochuan waved his hand and punched him, shaking with anger. He thought about Wei Xi and felt his heart race. He let go of him, took Ru Fei and ran to the bedroom on the second floor, pushing open the door.
Ru Fei covered her mouth with her hands and burst into tears, ‘Wei Xi…’
Ruan Shaonan was right, it was really too late, everything…was too late.
The person they were trying to save was sitting on Ruan Shaonan’s bed with her hair down and wrapped in a quilt, in a daze. Half of her snow-white body was exposed, and there was still blood oozing from her purple forehead. Her eyes stared straight ahead, dull and unfocused, without any life or focus. Her eyes were barren, and she had lost everything.
If it weren’t for Ru Fei picking up the clothes on the floor and wanting to drape them over her shoulders, she would have shrunk to the side in fear, her eyes timidly looking in a certain direction, her mouth silently mumbling, ‘Don’t touch me…’
If it weren’t for Ru Fei’s sobs, Ling Luochuan would have been blinded. He supported himself against the bed frame, forcing himself to stand, walked over, pulled Weixi out of the corner, wrapped her in the quilt, and picked her up.
He wanted to take her away with him, away from all this creepy stuff. He wanted to kill himself! He wanted to kill the whole world!
‘My God! Weixi, what’s wrong with you?’ Ruifei screamed in shock, except that she was looking at the quilt that was wrapped around Weixi. She looked back and saw the snow-white bed, almost collapsing to the ground.
Blood! There was blood everywhere, bright red blood. It was on the quilt, on the sheets, on the carpet, on Weixi’s legs, and on Ling Luochuan’s hands, all covered in blood!
‘Weixi, Weixi…’ He shouted at her as if she were crazy, shaking her, “What’s wrong with you? What’s wrong with you?” However, the person who was bleeding profusely ignored everything in front of her and turned a deaf ear to everything, as if she were an inflatable doll without a score of lives, tightly embraced in the arms of a man with bloodshot eyes.
The viscous liquid had already stained his front, and it was dripping onto the carpet, but it was still flowing. Ling Luochuan was shocked by the sight in front of him, and his breathing was difficult. He was holding the unconscious Wei Xi and walked out of the bedroom. Seeing Ruan Shaonan sitting in the living room, he almost spewed fire from his eyes.
If he didn’t look at him standing still. Crying and shouting, ‘Why didn’t you do it earlier? Forget about him, let’s get Weixi to the hospital first.‘
After getting into the car, Weixi suddenly started shaking with fear, crying, and gesturing rapidly and wildly with her hands in the air.
Ruxi was dumbfounded, and Ling Luochuan anxiously asked, “What did she say?”
Ruxi looked at Ling Luochuan and said incredulously, “She said she can’t go.”
’Why can’t she go?‘
’She said…he recorded it.’
With a crack, Ling Luochuan’s fist slammed hard on the steering wheel. The shrill car horn tore through the heavy darkness, but it could not tear apart the man’s devastating anger and endless sadness.
His eyes were red like blood. Taking a deep breath, he said, ‘Take her to the hospital first, I’ll handle the rest.’
Ling Luochuan ran into the emergency room with her in his arms. The nurses and doctors were shocked to see the bloodstained corners of the quilt. They quickly put her on the emergency bed and pulled the curtain shut with a bang.
The doctor inside instructed the nurse, ‘It’s a severe haemorrhage. First give her a hemostatic injection, then send her for an X-ray.’
Ten minutes later, the doctor looked at the X-ray and said to them, ‘The posterior fornix of the vagina is torn, and there is a two-centimetre deep, seven to eight-centimetre long tear below the mouth of the cervix. Immediate suturing is required, otherwise the unstoppable bleeding will be very dangerous. Which one of you is the family member? The operation requires the family member’s signature.’
Ling Luochuan said, ‘I’ll do it.’
After Ling Luochuan signed, the doctor looked at him and shook his head, sighing, ‘How can young people be so reckless? With a cut this long, the girl will suffer so much.’
Outside the operating room, Ruifei was either sitting on a chair with a dazed look on her face, or she was at a loss for what to do.
Ling Luochuan leaned his head against the wall, his black hair hiding his eyes. He slowly released his clenched fists, looked at Ruifei, who was about to cry but couldn’t, his throat tightening. After a long time, he whispered three words: ‘I’m sorry.’
As if she had just woken up from a dream, Ruifei rushed up and slapped him. She grabbed his blood-stained shirt and cried and yelled, ‘I told you long ago that she would die, she would die! Why didn’t you listen? Why didn’t you just listen! You bunch of bastards, inhuman animals! Haven’t you caused her enough harm? Why won’t you just leave her alone? Why?!’
Ruifei cried and fell to her knees. Ling Luochuan was pulled by her and, with his legs giving way, he fell over as well.
A young nurse came over and, looking at the two people sitting on the ground, lectured them, ‘This is an operating room, so no loud noises. If you want to cry or make a scene, please go outside.’
Rufei had to cover her mouth as she stood up and sat down on a chair, sobbing in pain.
Ling Luochuan sat next to her, looking at his blood-stained hands, and said in a confused manner, ‘I thought she was lying to me, that she was using me. I was going crazy, I was drunk and confused, I didn’t hear clearly, I didn’t think it would be so serious.’
Ru Fei asked tearfully, ‘She can’t even speak, what could she lie to you about?’
‘She got down on her knees and begged me for him.’ Ling Luochuan turned his face, a smear of blood on his face, his bloodshot eyes looking at her in a disoriented and confused manner, ‘Didn’t she like him? Then why did she say those things to me? Why give me hope? I don’t understand, I really don’t understand.’
‘Is that why?‘ Ruochen almost laughed out loud, took out her phone, and pointed at the photo on the screen saver.
’Chi Mo is my man, we’ve been together for six months. He used to like Weixi, but the person he loves now is me. Weixi only sees him as a brother, she never loved him.’
Ling Luochuan looked at her in surprise, at the photo on her phone.
‘Why did she…’
Ling Luochuan wanted to say, why didn’t Weixi tell him?
But did she really not say anything? She did say it, more than once, that she and Chi Mo weren’t in a relationship. It was him who didn’t want to believe her, who was blinded by the ‘facts’ before him, who was full of plots and schemes.
If she didn’t have to helplessly watch the man in front of her, who was regretting it beyond words, she would ask, ‘Are we crazy, or are you crazy? She pleaded for him, and he fought for her. Is there something between them? People often exchange benefits with each other, without any true feelings. Is this your logic? Wei Xi was really stupid, really stupid. How could a guy like you really understand her? She let her dreams go, and she ended up like this.
If you only believe what you are willing to believe. No matter how much I say, what is the point?
He looked blankly at the land beneath his feet. Remorse and guilt almost overwhelmed him. Weixi was right, he was just a spoiled rich boy who had never experienced true setbacks or hurt. They were both orphans, and the kind of bond they shared, one that valued life above all else, was something he had never experienced and would never understand.
Even if Weixi told him that, if he hadn’t been with Chi Mo, he would still have doubted her. He was only willing to believe what he saw for himself, and only looked at things from his own perspective. He was already used to thinking the worst of people.
It turned out that the so-called truth was only the truth when you were willing to believe it.
If she hadn’t said anything else, Ling Luochuan would have watched her lips move up and down, staring blankly for a long time, but he didn’t hear a word. He quickly went over the recent events in his mind, and suddenly thought of something. He stood up and said, ‘You stay here and watch her.’
He left those words and disappeared at the end of the night.
Ruan Shaonan sat in his living room, playing with the jade unicorn in his hands, and smiled sarcastically, ‘He actually gave you this. If it could protect you, you wouldn’t be here today.’
Just as he was watching, Ling Luochuan had already rushed in, grabbing his clothes. ‘You knew it a long time ago, didn’t you?’
“What do you mean? That Mo Rufei was with Chi Mo? Or that Wei Xi never used you or deceived you?’ Ruan Shaonan laughed mockingly, ‘I know, and there’s really so much that you don’t know. Which one do you want me to tell you?’
Ling Luochuan looked at his carefree face in disbelief and gritted his teeth, ‘Then let’s talk about it slowly, one thing at a time. How much are you hiding from me?’
Ruan Shaonan pushed him away, straightened his clothes, and sat back on the sofa, ‘I don’t know any more than you do. I just know her better than you do. That girl is stubborn and aloof. If she really wanted to take revenge, she wouldn’t seduce you, she would come straight to me. Use you? She wouldn’t even bother doing that. She only stayed with you for one reason…‘
He looked at his furious former best friend and gritted his teeth, “She likes you. She really likes you, even though you cheated on her, she still likes you. And you suspect her because she likes you? This is really ridiculous.”
’Is that why? Is that why you treated her like that? Are you fucking crazy!’ Ling Luochuan kicked over the coffee table and grabbed him by the shirt, scolding him fiercely, “Are you still a human being or not? Even if you don’t know her, even if it’s a stranger, you shouldn’t do such a vicious thing. Not to mention a woman who once loved you so much, how could you humiliate her like this? How could you do such a heartless thing!”
Ling Luochuan punched him in the face, and Ruan Shaonan didn’t dodge or avoid it, taking it hard. He fell onto the sofa, spat out the blood in his mouth, and asked with his face tilted upwards, ‘Is she dead?’
‘What did you say?’
‘I asked you, is she dead? If she’s not dead, then listen carefully, she’s mine, from beginning to end, from birth to death. You know what I have in my hands, so you’d better let her come back, otherwise, you should know the consequences.’
Ling Luochuan’s eyes widened, he couldn’t believe his ears, ‘You really are hopeless! Are you going crazy? Then I’ll go crazy with you! I’m telling you, I’m not Weixi, so don’t try to bluff me with those despicable tricks. If you’re so capable, then let everyone see that thing. Let them see what kind of face the great philanthropist and celebrity gentleman has behind his back. You think I don’t know you? You won’t do anything that costs you more than it benefits the enemy. So don’t try that with me.’
Ruan Shaonan wiped the blood from the corner of his mouth and sneered, ‘Then you try it and see if I dare.’
Ling Luochuan waved his hand and punched again, and Ruan Shaonan’s left tooth became loose. He spat out the blood in his mouth and looked at the man with bloodshot eyes and clenched fists mockingly, ‘Is that it? I thought you were going to kill me. Just don’t forget to take care of yourself after you kill me. Just as Mo Rufei said, what have you been doing? For so long, if only you had trusted her a little more and been a little more tolerant, I wouldn’t have had a chance. You just think about your own grievances, and you’re never satisfied. You handed her over to me yourself, and she’s ended up in this mess today. You’re a murderer just like me.”
Ling Luochuan was speechless. He slumped onto the sofa and looked at his blood-stained hands. Everything in front of him was like a repeat of history, but in a different form and with a different state of mind, yet it had the same ending.
‘But I didn’t lie to you about one thing,’ said Ruan Shaonan, straightening his tie. “She was indeed driven out by Lu Zi, because she pushed her younger sister down the stairs. That’s what the Lu family butler told me.”
Ling Luochuan raised his eyes, and Ruan Shaonan continued, ’But then I found out that the truth of the story had been distorted. Lu Youxi is not Lu Zixu’s biological daughter; she was born to Weixi’s mother and another man. It is not difficult to infer that it was Lu Zixu who pushed his wife to her death, and then pushed his young daughter, who was not related to him by blood, down the stairs, just as Wei Xi saw it. So, he framed his daughter, whom he had never liked, and drove her out.”
Ruan Shaonan sneered, ’Of course, the truth no longer means anything to you. The point is, when you heard about that incident, you chose to run away, while I would investigate it to the end. You really don’t know her as well as I do. And yes, you’ve only known her for a short time, but I’ve known her for seven years.‘
There was silence in the living room, and all you could hear was the sound of the two people’s breathing, like the sea after a storm, rising and falling with each breath.
’So what?’ Ling Luochuan suddenly raised her bloodshot eyes and looked straight at him, ’Even if you’ve known her your whole life, so what? Just because you know her and you know me, and you know all our weaknesses, you can hurt us without any scruples, can’t you?’
Ling Luochuan gave a sad smile, ‘Weixi is right. Apart from having a human skin, you are hollow inside, you have lost everything. Ruan Shaonan, you always think you are the smartest, always treating others as fools! You think I don’t know about your shady dealings with the Southeast Asian underworld?’
Ruan Shaonan’s left hand twitched slightly, a very subtle change, but he caught it.
Ling Luochuan sneered, ‘So you are afraid. You are very capable, and you can keep a tight lid on things, but you are not without a trace. After you left the United States, do you think the Chinese know about your old business in Southeast Asia, including your unscrupulous history of getting rich? I have always treated you as a friend. Even if you killed people and set fires outside, I only pretended not to know, thinking about how hard it was for you to get this far. But now, I am no longer your friend, and I am not your match. I am your sworn enemy.’
He stood up and pointed at him, saying, ‘You can keep the DV if you like and enjoy it slowly. Remember, if it gets out for even a second, I won’t kill you, I’ll slowly kill you.’
Chapter 56 Lingchi
‘You want to protect him, but who will save you now? Don’t be afraid, I won’t show it to anyone. As long as you don’t leave me, as long as you stay by my side. Weixi, you don’t know how much I miss you. I want to hold you, kiss you, hear you talk, and be with you forever. You are mine, always mine. You are my woman, and you will be my wife and the mother of my children. We will never be apart again, never, okay?’
She covered her ears like crazy, her tears blurring everything.
Where was she? And where was he?
She saw a girl, lying in fear on a magnificent retro bed. Her eyes rolled straight out, looking at the photo on the bedside table. The man in the photo, smiling broadly as he put his arm around her, was now on top of her, tearing her apart with his sharp claws.
She was limp on all fours, tears falling like rain, unable to live or die. She could hear her own soul wailing and crying on the ceiling, while the man whispered in her ear, enjoying himself, panting, endlessly torturing and violating her.
He was not a human being, but a beast, an insatiable, bloodthirsty beast.
She cried out, her broken voice unable to make a sound. She tried to open her eyes wide, looking at him through the cold tears, her eyes almost bleeding from the pain.
This was not lovemaking, this was slow torture, the peeling off of her skin, her flesh, her bloody flesh, piece by piece, from her bones!
Who was the person lying on the bed? Who was the person on top of her? She was confused, disoriented, and confused…
It was her, it was definitely her!
She woke up in tears from her dream, and someone next to her kept shaking her and shouting, ‘Weixi, Weixi…’
It was Ruifei’s voice, it was her voice.
Weixi wept silently, pressed her head into Ruifei’s arms, and said over and over again in sign language, ‘It’s so cold, Ruifei, I’m so cold, I’m so cold…’
Ruxi hugged her tightly, choking back her sobs, and said, ‘I’m holding you, I’m holding you, it’s okay, it’s okay…’
After a while, Weixi gradually calmed down. Ruxi dried her tears and asked, ‘Do you want to eat something? You haven’t eaten or drunk anything for two days.’
Weixi sat up, leaning against the bed, her eyes fixed on one spot, and asked in sign language, ‘Why isn’t the light on?’
Clang! Ru Fei dropped the lunch box in her hands on the floor. She looked up at the bright sunshine outside the window, covered her mouth and wept heartrendingly, ‘Weixi, your eyes, your eyes…’
The doctor placed the CT scan of the brain in front of the fluorescent light and pointed to a small dark shadow on it, saying, ‘Traumatic brain injury has caused intracranial bleeding, which is compressing the optic nerve. To restore vision, a craniotomy must be performed to remove the blood clot inside.’
‘Craniotomy? Is it dangerous?’
“Any surgery can be dangerous, and her condition is relatively serious. She had an old injury to the brain, which was not completely treated at the time. This new injury combined with the old injury will make the surgery more difficult.’
Ling Luochuan looked at the pictures, his eyes sunken, and asked in a daze, ‘If I have a craniotomy, what are the chances of regaining my sight?’
‘To be precise, the chances of recovery are only 10%.’
‘That low?’
“The human brain is the most complex organ in the body, and anything can happen. The location of her hematoma is very bad. A slight mistake could cause permanent blindness or other injuries. That’s why I said the chances of recovery are only 10%.’
‘Other injuries?‘
’For example, loss of consciousness, partial paralysis, confusion, loss of control, memory loss, and the possibility of…never waking up.”
Ling Luochuan let out a cold breath, and the last trace of blood from his face disappeared. ’So…can’t we just not do it? Will it be life-threatening?’
The doctor sighed, ‘Mr Ling, I can understand your feelings. But from a doctor’s point of view, I don’t recommend it. If you don’t operate, it’s like leaving a time bomb in the patient’s brain. In the short term, there may be no problem. But in the long term, the result will be the same. However, given Ms Lu’s current condition, I suggest that she be sent to a psychiatric rehabilitation centre first…’
Ling Luochuan was full of resistance, ‘No, she’s not crazy, I can’t send her to a place like that, absolutely not!’
The doctor shook his head. ‘Trust me, this is the best way. Acute mental disorders can destroy a person more easily than a blood clot in the brain. I once had a patient who was travelling with her husband when she was attacked by several criminals… The case was never solved. She recovered at home for six months, and her family thought she was fine. But then she went out to work for just one week, and then threw herself under a train. During this period, you’d better watch her 24 hours a day, so that she doesn’t commit suicide. Otherwise, it will be a lifelong regret.’
Ling Luochuan didn’t know how he made his way back to the ward. He pushed open the door and saw Wei Xi sitting on the bed like a delicate plastic model.
It was as if he was blind, with an endless black wilderness before him.
If Ruifei hadn’t grabbed him and asked, ‘What did the doctor say?’
he would have walked over, sat down by the bed, and said blankly, ‘The doctor said that I need to have a craniotomy. I’m going to send Wei Xi to the United States, where the conditions are better.’
Ruifei wanted to ask something else, but Chi Mo held her back, ‘Let’s go out for a walk and leave them alone for a while.’
Ruifei pushed Chi Mo’s hand away and pointed angrily at the man sitting by the bed, ‘This person, do you still believe him? If he hadn’t left him for dead, how would Wei Xi have become like this? Who is he to sit here? Putting on a face of a crocodile crying over its lost prey, it makes me sick just watching.’
Chi Mo sighed and looked at Ling Luochuan, who was full of grief, and said, ‘He’s not crying like a rat. He’s really sad. He only made one mistake, and God arranged the rest for him. You can feel sorry for him if you want, but let them be alone for a while. He must have a lot to say to her.’
If not wanted to say anything else, so Chi Mo put his arm around her shoulders and dragged her out.
In the courtyard of the hospital, there were several tall sycamore trees. The bright green leaves were still dripping with morning dew, and the sky was cloudless.
They sat on a bench under the trees. Ruifei couldn’t help but burst into tears as she looked at the fresh and lovely world before her. ‘I’m sorry, I’ve caused her harm.’
Chi Mo looked at her in surprise. ‘What do you mean?’
‘Six months ago, I shouldn’t have persuaded her to go out with Ruan Shaonan. Six months later, I shouldn’t have left her alone. All of Wei Xi’s tragedies were caused by me. I’m a bad woman, I deserve to go to hell.‘
’Did you do it on purpose?‘
’Do you think I did it on purpose?”
Chi Mo shook his head, ’I’ve never thought that way, and even if everyone in the world thinks that way, I still won’t think that way. Because I know that in this world, if there is someone who does not ask for anything in return for Weixi, that person must be you. For so many years, you have been looking up to her, willingly being her shadow, suffering her pain and rejoicing in her joy. Looking at you like this, apart from feeling heartbroken, I don’t know what else I can say.”
Ruofei buried her face in Chi Mo’s arms and sobbed, ’Chi Mo, what should I do?’
Chi Mo hugged her trembling body and said with a heartache, ‘Believe me, everything will be fine. You are all good women, and God will do you justice.’
Ling Luoxi touched Wei Xi’s face with her long, slender fingers. Tears glistened in the corners of her eyes as she said in a daze, ‘I was only gone for a moment, just a little while, and look at what happened to you.’
The person in the bed did not respond, like a frozen plaster statue.
He gently embraced her, and tears fell drop by drop into her neck. He looked up and saw the sunlight in the hospital room blooming violently like flowers. He suddenly smiled, ‘Weixi, I want you to live, but I can’t let you live like this. Let’s die together, let’s die together, okay? Seeing you like this, I’ve lost all hope, and it’s better to die. This world is meaningless. If even you have given up, what’s the point of me clinging to it?’
He helped her lie down on the bed and whispered in her ear, ‘But before that, there is something I must do. I will make those who have wronged you suffer. I will not spare any of them. You just wait and see…’
Chapter 57: Lighting up the darkness
During the eleven-day holiday, Ruan Shaonan sat in his villa, eating breakfast while watching the morning news.
“At around 11 o’clock last night, Gu Yongling, head of the Singapore Fu Huang Group branch, was attacked by criminals on her way home. Two criminals splashed a large amount of corrosive liquid on her face, causing extensive third-degree burns to her face, neck and limbs, as well as damage to the corneas of her eyes. Doctors say it may cause permanent blindness. Police suspect that the attack is related to Nie Donghua, chairman of the Donghua Group. The case is currently under further investigation.‘
Ruan Shaonan glanced at it indifferently and continued eating his breakfast.
The phone rang, it was Wang Dongyang.
’Mr Ruan, Miss Lu has already finished the suturing operation and is in a stable condition. It’s just that…’
Ruan Shaonan was playing with the Saturn lighter when he heard the other person hesitate and ask, ‘Just what?’
‘She is blind. The traumatic brain injury caused intracranial bleeding, which compressed the optic nerve.’
After Wang Dongyang had finished speaking, there was a long silence on the other end of the line. He couldn’t help but ask, ‘Mr. Ruan?’
‘Where is she now?’
“After the accident, she developed a psychosomatic mental disorder and they admitted her to a psychiatric rehabilitation hospital, where she is currently receiving treatment.’
‘And Ling Luochuan?‘
’He has been by Miss Lu’s side, never leaving her. When he goes out occasionally, he arranges for his bodyguards to stay at the sanatorium. He has already handed over the company’s affairs to his subordinates, but according to people from the Dynasty, he is now terrifyingly silent, almost like a different person. Even his closest subordinates don’t want to go near him. Mr. Ruan, do you think you need to send more people to protect your safety?’
‘No need. That’s it…”
After saying this, Ruan Shaonan hung up the phone. He placed his hand on the table, slowly clenched it into a fist, and suddenly swung his hand, sending the coffee cup flying and crashing to the ground.
He looked at the fragments for a long time before calming down. He looked at the lighter on the table for a while, and then dialed another number.
After the call was connected, he said in Southeast Asian, ’Godfather, how have you been lately?’
After the pleasantries, he got straight to the point, ‘Find me two people who are quick on their feet. I need them urgently.’
After hanging up the phone, he rested his hand on his forehead and felt a splitting headache. He stood up, found the painkillers and took them. Then he walked to the study, took a CD from the drawer and put it in the computer.
He leaned back in his chair, enjoying the heart-pounding images on the screen, and sneered, ‘I’ll see who dies first.’
The private rehabilitation centre Ling Luochuan arranged for Wei Xi had single-family units in the high-end ward area, similar to small villa-style buildings in a very quiet environment.
There were a few tall moon-hanging trees in the garden, and after the Mid-Autumn Festival, it was at its most flourishing time, with blossoms as bright as brocade and a heady fragrance.
Ling Luochuan had also rented the room next to Wei Xi’s, where he lived himself. Ling Luochuan left the bed in Weixi’s room for Ruifei. Chi Mo came every day to see how Weixi was doing and to cheer Ruifei up.
Ling Luochuan had hired the best doctors, provided the best environment, and spared no effort or resources, but no one knew when she would recover.
This battle seemed endless, and the endless waiting was so difficult that it was almost despairing.
When the weather is good, Ling Luochuan pushes Weixi in a wheelchair to the garden to soak up the sun. Weixi is still the same: motionless, unresponsive, and silent. She isolates herself from the world at a safe distance, a distance that will protect her from harm, but no one can cross it.
The psychiatrist said that this is a kind of post-traumatic stress disorder. When a person suffers a blow that is beyond her capacity to handle, she will shut herself away in a space that she believes is harmless, unwilling to face reality.
Ling Luochuan didn’t know what that harmless world of Wei Xi’s actually looked like. But he knew that it definitely didn’t include him. He didn’t know if she was as happy as he thought she was, but he knew that she definitely wasn’t as miserable as everyone else thought.
He sat in a chair and looked at the world from Wei Xi’s perspective. He suddenly realised that if he lowered himself a little, he would see a better view.
He became more and more at ease with the present situation, with Weixi, and with everything that was happening. He no longer longed for her to come back from the world she had left behind as he had before. Because he knew that she was happy there. And that happiness was something he had never been able to give her.
He often took her hand and spoke to her. He could sit for a whole day and talk to her without stopping. He could also stay with her day and night, in silence.
At first, everyone thought he was just grieving too much. After a while, even Ruofei sensed that something was wrong.
One evening, she saw Ling Luochuan sitting with Wei Xi under the shade of a tree, listening to the sound of cicadas. She couldn’t help but say to Chi Mo, ‘Something’s wrong with him lately, don’t you think?’
Chi Mo nodded, ‘I can see it too. He’s like a human time bomb, it seems like he could explode at any time.’
Ru Fei asked nervously, ‘Do you think he’ll hurt her?’
Chi Mo shook his head, ‘No. He’s more saddened than any of us by what happened to Wei Xi, how could he possibly hurt her?’
Ru Fei sighed and said, ‘That’s true. He used to be such an arrogant, domineering, sharp and astute person, but now he’s acting like a fool every day. His eyes aren’t as sharp as they used to be, and he doesn’t react as quickly as he used to. Sometimes it takes him three or four tries to react to a sentence I say to him, and he’s becoming more and more slow-witted…’
If she didn’t suddenly think of something, she would say, ‘Do you think he wants to kill himself? Should we find a way to notify his family and take him away?’
Chi Mo smiled helplessly, ‘Even if you lock him up, if he is determined to die, there is nothing you can do. But I don’t think he wants to die, he just wants to enter Weixi’s world and be with her.’
Ru Fei looked at the two people quietly snuggling in the garden and suddenly noticed that their expressions were becoming more and more similar.
She was shocked to see this, and when she thought about the mean things she had said to Ling Luochuan, she couldn’t help but blame herself: ‘Did I say too much? Weixi was right, it’s terrible to take out anger on others. In fact, I don’t really hate him, but for some reason, those words just came out.’
Chi Mo smiled, ‘People are emotional creatures. It would be scary if you were indifferent to this. Don’t worry, he won’t take your words to heart. Right now, the only person who can move him emotionally is Weixi. Only she can save him.’
Ru Fei shook his head. ‘But I still feel guilty. The way he looks now is hard for anyone to watch. If only I could be as stable and rational as you.’
Chi Mo put down the vase in his hands and gazed at Ru Fei, who was setting the table. ‘Actually, I’m not stable or rational at all. If one day you become like Weixi, I will become like Ling Luochuan. Do you believe me?’
Ru Fei turned his face to look directly into his eyes and nodded, ‘I believe you.’
Chi Mo smiled and nodded. She looked down and then looked at Ling Luochuan in the garden, who was fixing Wei Xi’s hair. She shook her head and sighed, ‘He can’t go on like this. I’m afraid that in the end, he’ll push both of them to the brink.’
After dinner, Wei Xi rested in her room. Ling Luochuan sat alone on a chair outside the room, staring thoughtfully at the sky.
Chi Mo came over and handed him a can of beer, ‘Do you want a drink?’
Ling Luochuan shook his head, ‘Thanks, I’ve given up.’
Chi Mo nodded and leaned against the wooden railing opposite him, saying, ‘It’s good to quit. Drinking does cause trouble and can even lead to irreversible mistakes. But that’s not scary. What’s scary is when you’re sober and realise that it’s already too late to do anything about it.’
Ling Luochuan looked at him and whispered, ‘I’m sorry.’
Chi Mo was a little surprised, ‘Why?’
‘I should have told you about what happened at the ‘Perfect Beauty’ that day. I’m sorry, I was drunk at the time. No! I should say that ever since Weixi left, I’ve been crazy, crazy for a long, long time, and I’ve never come to my senses.”
Chi Mo looked at him for a moment and said, ’In fact, I should beat you up badly, not only for Ruifei, but also for Weixi. But seeing how you look now, I don’t think it’s necessary anymore. No one will suffer more than you from this result.’
Ling Luochuan nodded and continued to gaze at the sky in a daze.
Chi Mo took a sip of his beer and suddenly said, somewhat abruptly, ‘Then you should also know that I used to like Weixi. No, I should say, I was very infatuated with her. She was very beautiful, but what fascinated me wasn’t her appearance, but there was something about her…’ He looked at his beer can and thought for a moment, ‘Something that’s hard to explain, something that’s similar to hope. It’s like when you’re walking down a dark road and you’re hoping to see something. Weixi is that glimmer of light in the darkness, lighting up the darkness for you.‘
Ling Luochuan repeated it under his breath, “Hope? Is it important to you?”
’It was worthless once. When you’re facing a world where violence is used to suppress violence, you don’t even know what hope is. But when you see a beautiful, pure girl sitting next to you, looking at you with trusting eyes, even if you’re a scumbag, you’ll still be moved.’
Ling Luochuan’s left cheek twitched slightly. Chi Mo took a sip of beer and continued, ‘Most of us “orphans of World War II” are born with hatred, with malicious intent from the moment we are born. I never considered myself a good person, but Weixi always said I was, and after hearing it so often, I came to believe that I might really be a good person. Then I discovered that being a good person is actually pretty good, at least it’s a lot more down-to-earth than being a bad person.’
Ling Luochuan looked at the ground, his deep-set eyes like a pool of stagnant water. ‘She once trusted me like this too, but unfortunately, she trusted the wrong person. If I’m not wrong, how can I have the face to sit in front of Weixi? Where was I when she needed me most? I was embracing a prostitute for pleasure. If she hadn’t come to beg me, I would have even let her die, and I even told her, “Let her go to hell…”
He suddenly looked up, his bloodshot eyes fixed on Chi Mo, and said in a disoriented voice, ‘I actually told the woman I loved to go to hell. Can you imagine? It was I who deserved to die, I should have died with that person. I should have done it a long time ago, I should have made everyone who had wronged her die, only in this way would she have been better off. Yes, that’s the way it should be…’
Ling Luochuan became more and more agitated as he spoke. Chi Mo looked at him and saw that something was wrong. He walked over and forced him to sit down in a chair, saying loudly, ‘Calm down. You’re just killing yourself, and killing everyone else won’t help. Have you ever wondered why she doesn’t want to face reality? Six months ago, she was seriously injured, but she got through it. She’s not someone who can’t handle pressure, so why did she choose to escape this time?’
Ling Luochuan looked up, his dark eyes full of confusion. ‘Because she hates me, because she doesn’t want to see me, isn’t that it?’ Confusion suddenly turned to fear. He tilted his head slightly and asked in a trembling voice, ‘Does she really not want to see me? But I can’t leave her. She can let me die, she can let me do anything. But she can’t make me not see her, she can’t, she can’t…’
Chi Mo sighed. If he wasn’t wrong, this man was driving himself crazy.
‘Have you ever thought about it? Maybe the situation is just the opposite.”
Ling Luochuan looked at him in a daze and repeated, ’The opposite?’
‘Maybe she doesn’t not want to see you, but doesn’t know how to face you. She thinks that if she hadn’t left you, she wouldn’t be in this situation, and that she herself is responsible for this terrible consequence, so she blames herself. And what Ruan Shaonan is holding in his hands makes her unable to face not only you, but also your proud origins, your family, and the pressure of public opinion. She doesn’t even know if she can still be a normal person in the future. Maybe…she still wants to protect you.’
Ling Luochuan looked at him in disbelief, ‘Really? Is that what she really thinks?’
“I believe so. Weixi is like Ru’er. They are the kind of women who will do anything for the people they love. Once they fall in love, they will put themselves very low, so low that they forget themselves. Survival itself is a victory. These are the words I said to Weixi, but she made me understand this truth.’
Chi Mo sat down next to Ling Luochuan and looked into his eyes, which had regained their hope. ‘If you were a man, and if you were really willing to bear all the pressure for her, you would go and tell her. Tell her that what that animal did to her is not a stain on her; tell her that you don’t care; tell her that you will face it together with her; tell her that you will not bow to anyone, and that you want her to hang on, to hang on for you.’
After Ling Luochuan entered the ward, he walked over to Ru Fei, shaking his head. ‘Are you really sure that Wei Xi thinks that way?’
Chi Mo sighed, and draped his jacket over Ru Fei’s shoulders. ‘I don’t know…let’s try to help him.’
Ru Fei looked at him, ‘Chi Mo, I know you really want to help them, but have you thought about it? If you’re wrong, and he’s in his current state, he really could go crazy.’
Chapter 58: Desperate Measures
It was already late autumn, the season when the autumn wind is bleak and the leaves fall. The whole city was immersed in a warm golden colour, like an intentionally aged film strip, warm and hazy and beautiful.
Ling Luochuan pushed Weixi and arrived under the laurel tree in the garden. The setting sun was warm, the fragrance of the laurels wafted in the air, and there was no sense of desolation, only a rich fragrance.
He pulled the blanket over Weixi, then wrapped his scarf around her neck. Then he sat down on the stone bench under the tree and said to her, ‘Weixi, I’ve told you a lot these days. But I still haven’t told you about my childhood.’
He turned his face to look at her, but Wei Xi still looked indifferent. Ling Luochuan took her hand, looked tenderly at her unchanging face, and told her in the softest voice.
“You may not be able to imagine, but I was actually very well-behaved as a child. My father was still working in the army at the time, and he educated our children just as he would have taught his soldiers. As far as I can remember, he never seemed to hug me. So from childhood to adulthood, my brothers and sisters and I never knew the difference between our father and his commanding officers. Everyone outside thinks we were born with a silver spoon in our mouths, but those of us who grew up in this kind of family know the pain inside all too well.”
Wei Xi looked quietly into the distance, her unfocused eyes like an empty desert.
Ling Luochuan looked at her with sad eyes and continued, ’But that’s not the worst of it. What I can’t stand is that he abandoned his sick wife for his work. I was only eight years old at the time, and I watched as my mother cried and cried while lying in her hospital bed, calling out his name. By the time he arrived at the hospital, her body had already cooled. From then on, I hated him, hated him very much. But what really broke my heart was when I was twelve years old. I was kidnapped, and the kidnappers demanded that I be exchanged for a spy they had in their possession. My father, without hesitation, refused, and even went so far as to suppress all news of the incident.
His voice became hoarse as he spoke, and he took Weixi’s hand and pressed it to his face before continuing: ‘To minimise the damage, he gave me up. They handcuffed me in the room, filled it with petrol, and left after throwing a match. I broke my thumb to slip my wrist free, then smashed the air vent with a chair and climbed out of the inferno. After that, I completely lost hope in him. If even your own father can abandon you and betray you, I don’t know who else in the world I can trust. After that incident, my grandfather took me to the United States. I lived by his side for many years. He loved me very much and always said that among all his children, I was the one who most resembled my mother. However, none of this could make up for the damage caused to me by the fire. I became increasingly moody and surly. When my grandfather passed away, he handed over his family business to me in its entirety.’
Ling Luochuan shook his head as he said this, looking into Wei Xi’s eyes and saying sincerely, ‘But none of this is what I want. Because when you realise that one of your decisions will affect the lives and interests of thousands of people, the pressure is beyond words. I spent many years in military school, and the path of business is fundamentally different. The embarrassment of being a late starter made the first few years of my life very difficult. I made many mistakes and attracted many jokes. It also made me slowly learn what it means to be unscrupulous and ruthless. At that time, I felt that the whole world owed me an apology and I should fight back. It wasn’t until I met you that I realised…’ He laughed self-deprecatingly, “how ridiculous my so-called disasters were compared to what you have been through.”
He held her hand tightly and looked at her sadly, ’When I was a child, my grandfather told me that each of us wears a mask every day. If we wear the mask for too long, we will forget our true faces. But if you’re lucky, you’ll meet someone. Someone who will tell you what kind of person you need to be, and what kind of person you should be.”
He pressed his face into the warm palm of her hand. ’Weixi, I don’t dare ask for your forgiveness. I just want to tell you: you showed me what kind of person I should be. I dare not let you come back, because the world has never been kind to you. At one point, I believed that no matter how unbearable the things we’ve been through are, we shouldn’t choose to escape. But if there is anyone in this world who is qualified to be a deserter of memories, it is only you, and only you are qualified to forget all this horror. But…”
He buried his face in her shoulder and choked, ’Weixi, even so, I still hope you will come back. Even though the world has let you down time and time again, can you be strong for me, just for me, just once? Just for me, just for me, okay? Okay?’
The person in his arms remained indifferent. He looked through the gaps in the leaves at the clear autumn sky. The sky was high and the clouds were light. The geese were flying, and autumn was gone.
The whole world was peaceful and quiet, with not a sound. Occasionally, the wind rustled the leaves. The golden autumn leaves floated down, swaying, and landed on his face.
He lowered his head and rested it on her shoulder. He didn’t cry, but the smile on his face was even more unbearable than tears. He trembled like a child afraid of the cold, smiling sadly and helplessly, ‘I knew it, he was lying to me. I knew it long ago, you wouldn’t wake up for me, I knew it long ago…’
He still cried, hot tears wetting the corners of her eyes. He sobbed like a child, unable to control himself, unable to do anything.
‘Tell me, Weixi, what should I do? I’m at my wits‘ end. I really don’t know what to do…’
Large autumn leaves fell silently, like the poignant rain of flowers the two had seen that night. The red petals that danced through the air were so poignant and beautiful, like a sad love song, like a dream from which there was no awakening.
That night, as he looked at the beautiful red lotuses in the pond, he said to her, ‘Do they know how much I like you?’
There was silence all around. She looked down without saying a word. She couldn’t see the expression on his face, the anxious expectation of a young man. At that time, she didn’t answer him, but wrote him four words: ‘A new dawn after the willows’.
‘A new dawn after the willows’, ‘A new dawn after the willows’… Ling Luochuan repeatedly chewed these words over and over in his heart. At that time, he thought he was seeing renewed hope. Now, at the end of the road, he realised that from beginning to end, it had all been a dead end, a dead end…
After the long holiday, people had not yet recovered from the festive atmosphere when an explosive piece of news shocked the entire city.
An indecent video was going viral on the internet, rumoured to be of a college student having sex with a financial tycoon. Although the video had only been circulating for a short time and was extremely short, it still left those who watched it speechless.
The reason was none other than the fact that the leading man in the indecent video was a powerful figure in the financial world.
Such a shocking piece of news was like a shot in the arm for the entertainment media. Paparazzi from all walks of life, carrying their own means of sustenance, came roaring towards the sanatorium like mad dogs let loose from the leash.
Ling Luochuan was afraid that Wei Xi would be affected, so he doubled the number of bodyguards and surrounded the entire high-class ward area like a wall of iron and steel. But even so, there were still reporters trying to cross the line, and they even called the hospital room.
Ling Luochuan, furious, sued the reporters from those newspapers and TV stations for invading his privacy. Although this had some deterrent effect, it also made the already over-excited media public almost crazy with attention.
Naturally, there were also some unethical tabloids that took things out of context, added fuel to the fire, and were so sharp in their rhetoric that they hit the mark with almost every word. They went to great lengths to mock and ridicule, and they were so relentless that they seemed determined to bring someone down.
Ling Luochuan wanted to let Weixi go home to rest, but there were always reporters outside day and night. Whenever they appeared, they came swarming from all directions like hornets in a nest. Ling Luochuan had to give up the idea, considering that Wei Xi might be frightened.
In order to prevent Wei Xi from being harassed, Ruo Fei and Chi Mo guarded her almost around the clock, and the bodyguards outside were also on high alert.
Ling Luochuan was annoyed by this matter, but after all, he was an experienced person, and the more critical the situation, the more careful and calm he became.
He knew without even thinking who had released the video, and naturally knew that the person who did it did so to make him panic and to use the power of the media to restrict him in every way.
If not, when he saw the unclear video on Ling Luochuan’s laptop, he asked him puzzledly, ‘I thought he would release the video with Wei Xi, why is it yours?’
Ling Luochuan rubbed his forehead and said, ‘He never wanted to put himself at the centre of public opinion. Maybe, he didn’t record it that day at all. He just put a DV there to show off. For one thing, he wouldn’t ruin the good image he had spent a lot of money to get back; for another, he just wanted to get Weixi, not really to drive her to death. Ruan Shaonan’s actions were spiteful, but I have to admit that he is still a little different from her.’
When she heard him say that, she could not help but sneer. ‘That bastard! I don’t believe for a second that he has Weixi’s best interests at heart. He has already hurt her so much, and yet he can still do something so beastly to her. Who else could he possibly have room for in his heart except for himself?’
Ling Luochuan’s eyebrows were knitted together. This was also the most unreasonable thing about it. He knew that Ruan Shaonan had always regarded himself as a hunter, standing at the top of the food chain. But when a hunter hunts, he doesn’t look into the eyes of his prey, because he will be unable to do it out of sympathy.
However, Ruan Shaonan is different. He likes to look at the desperate expressions of his prey as they are trapped, just like a cat playing with a mouse. He likes to derive pleasure from other people’s suffering. Even when dealing with people he loves, he will not relent until he achieves his goal.
He can forget about love and affection in order to succeed. Now, in order to get a woman, he is willing to hurt others. This kind of ruthlessness, which will not stop until the goal is achieved, makes Ling Luochuan, who has no taboos, marvel in wonder.
Is he like this by nature, or was it created by his environment?
Ling Luochuan remembered that morning, when Ruan Shaonan was driving him home from the villa at the top of the mountain, he had described a scene from the black market boxing in Cambodia.
Did he really see it, or did he experience it himself?
In either case, one thing is certain: it was from this experience that he learned to treat everyone and everything with ‘unrelenting ruthlessness’.
Ling Luochuan thought for a moment, and said to Ru Fei, ‘You and Chi Mo must be careful when you go in and out on your own. Obviously, he’s coming after people close to Wei Xi.’
Ru Fei nodded, ‘You too. But then again, how did he get this video? You’re not that careless.’
Ling Luochuan fixed the background of the video, enlarged it, and analysed it: ‘This is a private villa. I remember that I was drunk at the time and mistook a girl next to me for Weixi. When I came to my senses, I realised that Ruan Shaonan was there that night as well. This clip was probably filmed at that time. There should be more than just this clip. I guess they only showed so little of it for fear of angering our family patriarch.’
Ruo Fei looked at him strangely and said, ‘You’re a good drinker, so how could you get drunk to the point where you mistook someone else for Wei Xi, and even let someone film you like that without realising?’
She was right to point it out, and Ling Luochuan bowed his head and contemplated for a moment before saying, ‘There can only be one explanation, I fell for his trap. I was in a bad mood after arguing with Wei Xi, and I happened to meet a girl who looked like her there, and I happened to get so excited that I couldn’t control myself. At the time, I just thought it was all a coincidence. But now, looking back, the whole thing was a trap from the beginning. He’d been planning it against me from the start. When I left that night, my hands were shaking so badly I couldn’t even drive. I think someone must have put something in my drink.”
Ru was sitting in a daze on a chair, muttering to herself, “He’s so horrible. What are we going to do…”
Ling Luochuan was about to say something when his phone suddenly rang.
He saw the caller ID and picked up the phone somewhat irritably. ‘Sister, you don’t need to say anything else, I’m not going back. If he insists, tell him to send an army to arrest me… What? A heart attack?!’
Ling Luochuan put the phone down and asked, somewhat worriedly, ‘Your father is sick? Is it serious?’
He sighed, ‘The situation is not good. I need to go back to Beijing.’
‘What about here…’
‘Don’t worry, I’ll leave someone here. And I can ask my brother for a small favour while I’m back.’
Ling Luochuan turned his face and looked out the window at the autumn leaves falling, muttering to himself, ‘It’s time to let this damn everything end.’
Chapter 59: This life, this world, we will never meet again
Ling Luochuan walked into the ward. She hadn’t yet woken up, and Chi Mo was keeping watch over her. He nodded to him and left.
He sat by the bed, holding her hand, ‘Weixi, I have to go. My father had a heart attack and is in the ICU. My sister said he probably won’t last more than a few days.’
When he finished speaking, sadness filled his eyes, and he smiled, ‘I always thought he was indestructible, but I never imagined that such a tough guy could be made to lose his temper by me. I’m sorry, I have to leave you here for a while. The bodyguards here will be responsible for your safety, and Chi Mo and Ru Fei will take good care of you.’
He leaned down and whispered something in her ear, then kissed her forehead lightly and whispered, ‘Take care…’
As he was about to leave the door, he seemed to faintly hear a sound behind him, as if there was a voice trying to persuade him to stay.
The feeling was so strong, so sad, so sorrowful, as if this parting was for eternity. This life, this world, they would never meet again.
He slowly turned back, wondering if he had heard it wrong. He saw the person in the bed lying quietly, sound asleep. In the whole ward, apart from her gentle breathing, he could only hear the sound of the wind blowing the leaves outside the window.
He knew that he really had heard it wrong.
He smiled sadly, turned back and looked at her deeply one last time, then closed the door and left.
After walking out of the ward, he looked back one last time before turning away.
Along the way, he listened to the sound of his footsteps, as well as the sound of the leaves and sand beneath his feet. Not far from him, a mother was walking with a little girl, picking up the fallen leaves.
The little girl’s big eyes were full of curiosity about autumn. She looked at the man standing under the laurel tree and saw his beautiful dark eyes. He was facing the rosy-purple sky at dusk, with beautiful white doves circling in the air and the autumn leaves falling silently…
She tugged her mother’s hand and asked in a childish voice, ‘Mommy, look, why is that brother crying?’
A few hours later, Ling Luochuan was sitting on a red-eye flight to Beijing. He felt his heart tighten as the altitude increased. He turned his face to look out the window. The city was slowly getting smaller, as was the land, until it finally disappeared into the dark night.
He lowered his head, feeling as if he should do something, otherwise the sadness in his heart would be unbearable.
He asked the flight attendant for a piece of blank paper, held the pen, and contemplated for a long time before writing on it:
‘When I boarded the plane, I kept thinking about how you used to be. I thought about the first time we met at the ‘Perfect Beauty’ restaurant, about you painting in the square, about the girl playing the guitar and singing, about the dusk in the city behind you, about the doves flying around us that day… I thought about so many things. But every image that came to mind was so sad. I’ve heard it said before that there’s a kind of tears that come from sadness. It occurred to me then that when you smile, your eyes and eyebrows are full of tears, and you are sad. Why didn’t I see it before?
I’ve always wondered when exactly I fell in love with you. But I really can’t remember. It seems like a short time, but also like a long time. It seems like it happened in this life, but also like it happened in the last life. Perhaps it was because the story of our past life was so sad, and the ending was so desolate. So I forgot about you, and you left me behind.
A piece of music played on the radio, a sad Mandarin song. The soft female voice echoed in his ears as he turned his face to look out the window at the thick, impenetrable black fog.
Weixi, from the beginning to the present, our story has never been a beautiful one. But the most beautiful scene of my life was meeting you. I once gazed at you quietly in the crowd, once breathed the same air as you, and once stood shoulder to shoulder with you, looking at the most beautiful scenery in the world.
You made me understand: love is not about oaths or promises, it is about keeping a promise from the beginning to the end, as always, without conditions, without a bottom line, without constraints, and with all your strength.
Do you still remember the song that the girl playing the guitar on the square sang? That day, I saw you listening to her sing and I heard you cry. I still remember the lyrics of that song and its beautiful, sad melody.
I will always remember my promise to you. I will be your guardian and do my best to protect you for the rest of my life. Until the end of my life, I just hope that my heart can touch the heavens and my love can turn into a beautiful angel to love you for me…
As the rain falls to the river below, the morning dew has not yet dried…
As the rain falls to the river below, the morning dew has not yet dried…
I silently recite our names in my heart, using them as a secret code to meet again in the afterlife.
Weixi, if there really is an afterlife, and if we can meet again in the afterlife, will we…
Three years later…
Ruan Shaonan sat in the first seat of the conference room in the Yitian Building, listening to his subordinates give their work reports. The global financial crisis was over, but this year’s performance was not much better than previous years, so naturally his face did not look good.
The heads of each department looked at his stern face and could not help but feel a cold sweat as they spoke. The person speaking could feel the tense atmosphere, and his voice trembled as he reported.
Halfway through the meeting, Ruan Shaonan’s phone rang. For the past two years, he has always carried two mobile phones with him, only one of which is switched on 24/7, even during meetings. And only one person knows this phone number.
Ruan Shaonan immediately answered the phone, gently asking, ‘Are you up? Have you eaten?’ while gesturing with his eyes for his subordinates to pause their report.
The room was silent as everyone walked out. The two newcomers, not knowing what was going on, asked the more senior colleagues as they walked, ‘Whose phone is this? Mr. Ruan is taking this so seriously that his face has gone pale.’
One of them whispered, ‘Of course it’s Mrs. Ruan, Mr. Ruan’s treasure. Mr. Ruan is famous for doting on his wife. This phone call from her has come at just the right time, saving us all.’
“Mrs. Ruan? I heard she has a problem with her brain, is that true?’
‘It’s true. It seems to have been caused by an accident. She has a blood clot in her brain and she’s gone completely crazy. When they first got married, she tried to kill herself several times. Luckily, she was blind, otherwise who knows what would have happened. Later, I heard that she even stabbed Mr. Nguyen. At the time, she couldn’t speak because her voice box was damaged, so no one knew what she really wanted. But Mr. Nguyen not only did not despise her, he also sent her to the United States for medical treatment. She was treated for more than a year and returned with a healed eye and the ability to speak, but she had forgotten everything that had happened in the past. So now Mr. Nguyen can only take care of her like a child, and he is so busy at work, I don’t know how hard it is for him.”
The two newcomers exclaimed in amazement after hearing this, saying, ’I never imagined that Mr. Nguyen was so affectionate and loyal, and this woman is really blessed.’
‘Isn’t that right? I don’t know how many lifetimes it took to meet such a handsome, rich, and devoted man. Mr. Ruan doesn’t go anywhere after work anymore, spending all his time with his wife. He avoids social engagements as much as possible, the perfect husband.”
A female colleague sighed, “Alas, why can’t I meet such a good man?”
The others laughed and said, ’You did, but unfortunately, you’re not his type. Maybe in the next life…’
Ruan Shaonan drove home, passed the cake shop, bought Wei Xi’s favourite chestnut cake, and returned to the car. On the way, he passed an electronics store, and an LCD TV on display was broadcasting a news report.
“Three years ago today, a night flight of GH Airlines suddenly exploded in flight, killing all 103 passengers on board. Although it has been three years since the disaster, its impact on people’s hearts has continued to this day. Now, let us pay our deepest respects to the victims of the tragic air disaster three years ago…‘
Ruan Shaonan turned his head and glanced at the host’s face, which flashed before his eyes. He closed the car window and accelerated.
After arriving home, he handed the car to his driver to park. He carried the cake into the house and, not seeing her in the living room, asked the maid, “Where is Madam?”
’Madam is in the bedroom.’
Ruan Shaonan nodded, walked up to the second floor, and pushed open the bedroom door… He instantly stiffened, terrified by the sight before him. He stood in the doorway, unable to move, and nervously asked, ‘Weixi, what are you doing?’
The person standing on the windowsill looked at his white face in confusion and replied, ‘A corner of the curtain fell off, so I wanted to hang it back up…’
Her voice was a little hoarse. Although her damaged vocal cords had recovered their ability to produce sound thanks to expensive treatment, they would never be the same as before.
Ruan Shaonan let out a heavy sigh, walked over, and picked her up from the windowsill while she was still wearing her pajamas. He instructed her, ‘In the future, leave this kind of thing to the maid. You have a hand disability. What if something were to happen?’
Wei Xi put her arms around the man’s neck, looked at her hand, and said, ‘Didn’t you say that I should exercise my left hand more, so that I can get better at holding things?’
Ruan Shaonan froze for a moment, then laughed and said, ‘Physical therapy takes time. Didn’t the doctor tell you to practice catching balls first?’
The person in his arms pouted and said a little disheartened, ‘I’ve been practicing for over a year, but I haven’t made any progress at all. My left hand still has no strength. Will it never get better? And the red marks on my wrists, and on my neck, they’re so ugly, where did they come from?’
Those are the scars left after plastic surgery. Her scars are too deep and hideous, and the most advanced surgery can only go so far.
But he can’t tell her that.
Ruan Shaonan frowned and said, ‘I already told you, those are just drug reactions, and they will gradually fade away. The doctor already told you not to worry, and that it will get better in the future, so why don’t you listen?’
The person who was just full of impatience immediately looked at him nervously and asked in a low voice, ‘Are you angry?’
Ruan Shaonan shook his head, put her on the bed, ran his hands through her short hair, and whispered, ‘I’m not angry, I’m just a little tired. Something happened at work recently, and I’m not in a good mood.’
Wei Xi looked at him carefully, ‘I disturbed you while you were working today, didn’t I? I didn’t mean to. I had a nightmare, and you weren’t here, so I got a little scared.’
‘No, it’s nothing to do with you,’ Ruan Shaonan covered her up, ‘what did you dream about today?’
‘I don’t remember much, it was a very scary and sad dream. There was a man in the dream, I couldn’t see his face clearly, I could only see that he was covered in blood. He took my hand and said a lot of things to me, but I couldn’t hear what he was saying. Whenever he spoke, I would cry, and I just kept crying and crying in the dream, and then I woke up crying. It’s really strange, why was I crying? I must have been scared by him, that must be it.’
Wei Xi tilted her little head and finished, poking the man who was lost in his thoughts with her finger, ‘Hey, what are you thinking about?’
Ruan Shaonan felt like he had been pricked by a needle and suddenly woke up. Looking at Wei Xi’s puzzled little face, he smiled awkwardly, ‘You must not have taken your medicine on time, that’s why you had this dream. Have you taken your medicine today?’
Wei Xi shook her head and said, ‘The maid has to feed me, but I said I won’t eat until you come back.’
Ruan Shaonan pinched her chin affectionately and scolded, ‘You are really becoming more and more willful. It seems that in the future, I really can’t spoil you too much.’
Wei Xi smiled and buried her face in the man’s arms. Ruan Shaonan took out the pillbox from the bedside table, took out today’s dosage from one of the compartments, then picked up the glass on the cabinet and put the handful of pills into Wei Xi’s hands. He watched her take them while tilting her head back, and then handed her the glass.
‘When will I remember what happened before?‘ Wei Xi asked as she drank the water.
Ruan Shaonan helped her lie down. “As long as you take your medicine on time, you’ll remember soon.”
Wei Xi nodded and asked again, “Shaonan, what does it mean to be someone’s ”forbidden possession’?”
Ruan Shaonan was taken aback and said, ’Who taught you this word?’
‘I read it online today. The male protagonist keeps the female protagonist locked up at home every day, forbidding her to go out, to meet strangers, or to speak to them. She says that she is his forbidden treasure. How come I feel like she’s being treated in a similar way to me?”
Ruan Shaonan smiled helplessly and said, ’Silly girl, how can it be the same? You are my wife. Don’t read this kind of nonsense in the future, it’s all bad for you.’
‘Oh, wife…’ Wei Xi nodded and yawned, “So when can I go out? I’ve been at home for a long time, and if I stay any longer I’ll get dumber and dumber.”
Ruan Shaonan smiled and kissed her forehead, “You’re not dumb at all. You can go out now. Tomorrow is the weekend, so let’s go out and have a look around. You can buy whatever you want. We’ll go wherever you want.”
Wei Xi opened her drowsy eyes and said excitedly, ’Really? Is that how it’ll be from now on?’
Ruan Shaonan kissed her eyes tenderly and whispered, ‘Yes, it will always be like this. You can do whatever you want. You are my wife, and there is nothing you can’t do. Everything I have is yours, even me.’
Wei Xi closed her eyes contentedly and said indistinctly, ‘Shaonan, you are so good to me…’
Ruan Shaonan looked at her as she closed her eyes and heard her breathing even out. He touched her face and said tenderly, ‘No, I haven’t been good enough. From now on, I will be doubly good to you. I will make you the happiest woman in the world, Weixi, my darling…’
He leaned down and gently pressed his face against her ignorant face.
It had been three years, and he had hidden her for three whole years, but he could not hide her forever. All the damned people were dead. All the dangers had been averted. She was his, and would always be his. No one could take her away from him, no one.
He was confident that he could control the situation. So there was no need to keep her locked up any longer. She was his wife, and she needed to enjoy life and share his success with him. He would bring her the best things in the world, just as she had always reserved the best for him.
When Ruan Shaonan saw that Wei Xi was asleep, he quietly left and went to his study alone. As dusk fell, the furniture in the study was shadowy and purple, creating a foreboding atmosphere. He didn’t turn on the lights, sat alone in a chair and lit a cigarette.
He watched the smoke slowly fill and dissipate, then picked up the phone on the table and dialed a number.
‘Dr Wu, this is Ruan Shaonan.‘
’What can I do for you, Mr Ruan?‘
’I want to ask, will my wife’s hand never recover?”
Dr Wu sighed and said, “Mr Ruan, that is certain. She broke several important meridians at the time, and it is simply impossible for her to recover to her previous state.”
Ruan Shaonan paused for a moment before saying, ’Then, will she remember anything from the past?’
‘Your wife’s amnesia is caused by damage to the memory area during the craniotomy. From a medical point of view, she may remember some scattered fragments under external stimuli. But the chances of a full recovery are almost zero.‘
Ruan Shaonan asked, “No chance at all?”
’If she doesn’t need to take that kind of antidepressant, a miracle might happen. But for now, I can only say that there is no chance at all. Mr. Ruan, I need to remind you that although that kind of medicine has the least side effects among all similar drugs, However, if taken for a long period of time, it can cause damage to the heart, lungs and liver, and may also damage the nervous system, causing long-term harm. If your wife’s depression has improved, I suggest that she temporarily stop taking the medication.‘
’Okay, I understand. Thank you.”
Ruan Shaonan put down the phone, folded his hands on the desk, and contemplated for a long time. It wasn’t until the maid came to tell him that dinner was ready that he stood up and left the study.
Chapter 60: Better off dead
After dinner, Ruan Shaonan snuggled up to Wei Xi as usual, and they settled down on the sofa in the living room to watch TV. Wei Xi held a slice of chestnut cake in one hand and a small fork in the other, and she ate with relish while watching the show.
Wei Xi was enjoying her meal when she looked up and saw Ruan Shaonan with his eyebrows knitted in concern. She reached out her little hand to iron his frown, and took a small bite of cake with her fork and fed it to him.
Ruan Shaonan swallowed the cake, looked down and kissed her, and couldn’t help but laugh when he saw her little face smeared with cream. He took the cake from her hand and put it aside, then picked her up.
From the man’s arms, Wei Xi reached out a hand and pointed at the cake that had been left out of the way, complaining, ‘My cake, I haven’t finished it yet?’
The man’s hot lips kissed her collarbone, which was exposed outside her pajamas, and his voice was hoarse, ‘We’ll eat it later…’
The stars tonight are so beautiful, just like the night many years ago when the maple leaves were ablaze with fire and the autumn wind was gently blowing. He sat on the swing with Weixi at the Lu family mansion, counting the falling autumn leaves and gazing at the starry sky. The night was very quiet, silent all around, except for the sound of his pounding heart. She buried her face in his chest, her eyes closed, a touching smile on the corner of her mouth.
He laughed and asked her what she heard, and she said she heard a world.
He kissed her lovingly, asking himself if he was really getting old. He had become increasingly sentimental lately, and increasingly fond of reminiscing. No, it wasn’t just reminiscing. He wanted to turn back time, reverse the years.
If God would allow it, if the gods would agree, he would trade everything he had for the pure white Ruan Shaonan, for the simple and happy Lu Weixi.
He lifted her face and gazed at her beautiful, flower-like face in the darkness, the tears in the corners of his eyes shining like stars in the endless night.
He collapsed exhausted, breathing heavily, his body covered in sticky sweat. He moved his wet body away, as if afraid of staining her, and in the darkness, carefully touched her face, which was cold.
It was just as he had feared, just as he had expected…
His body, which had been hot a moment ago, suddenly went cold. It was like a cold Christmas landing on a charming feast, like snow falling in December in June.
He lit the table lamp, and the warm light dispelled the silent darkness. Wei Xi bit the corner of the quilt, her face full of cold tears, crying so hard that her eyelashes stuck together.
Ruan Shaonan sighed, hugged her lovingly, and said, ‘Don’t cry. Next time, if you don’t like it, just say so and we won’t do it.’
Wei Xi lifted her misty eyes and looked at him pitifully, ‘But I am your wife, aren’t I? Shouldn’t I love you very much before I marry you? But why does it hurt so much here every time you hold me and we are joined together, as if someone is gouging it out?’
Wei Xi pointed at her heart and cried, ‘Shouldn’t it feel very happy? Why does it hurt so much? It hurts so much… Shao Nan, what should I do? What should I do? I’m in so much pain, really in so much pain, I can’t breathe…”
Ruan Shao Nan hugged her tightly and looked up at the high ceiling. He didn’t dare lower his head, because he knew that if he did, the tears would come pouring out.
After a long while, he restrained himself and said tenderly, ’It’s okay, it will get better in the future, it will definitely get better. Even if it doesn’t get better, it’s okay, I’ll always wait for you.’
Wei Xi buried her face in the man’s arms and let her tears fall on his solid chest. ‘I’m sorry, I’ve always caused you trouble. I’m not a good wife, you must hate me, don’t you?’
‘No, no…’
His tears still fell. Wei Xi had once said that he owed her an ‘I’m sorry’. But now, even if he said ‘I’m sorry’ to her ten thousand times, it would not help.
Wei Xi cried herself to sleep. Ruan Shaonan soothed her for a long time before she suddenly closed her eyes. Ruan Shaonan watched her fall asleep, covered her up, leaned back in his chair, and looked at the darkness in the room.
Why did she do this? Of course he knew. He was the only one who knew. Because he was the one who had caused all of this. Even if the memories disappeared, the feelings remained, the pain remained, the despair remained, and it would never change.
What happened three years ago, those tragic scenes, those bloody fragments… He felt his throat itch and dry, as if something were going to vomit out of it. He was like a person suffering from dyspepsia, as if he were going to empty all his fear and sadness from his stomach.
Three years ago…
He was crazy then, he must have been crazy, driven crazy by her despair and hatred. She couldn’t see or speak, but her unfocused eyes were full of cold hatred, and he could see it clearly.
He dared not let her touch any metal object, not even a needle or a screw. He had her watched around the clock. Even so, she could still think of countless ways to leave him, to leave him in the most tragic and irreversible way.
It was only because he had told her that Ling Luochuan was dead and would never come back.
The woman he had gone to such lengths to win back had actually sought death for the sake of another man.
His life was pale, his hopes were dim, his love was barren, and his faith was destroyed. The future was like a corpse frozen in death, dragged into the violent sunlight, emitting a stench of decay. He could no longer bear it, and everything around him was like a black vortex, consuming his reason.
He became an unreasonable tyrant, inhuman and irrational. She was his wife, her heart was dead, but her body was still his.
She could not see or speak, and her sign language was incomprehensible to most people. Even among the multitudes, no one knew what she had suffered, no one understood her pain, no one knew what her well-dressed, gentle and considerate husband had done to her.
Her body showed no signs of injury, but he knew that the soul hidden beneath the magnificent clothes had been ravaged by him in a manner bordering on rape.
Then she gave in. He really thought she had given in. She no longer hated him, just lay in bed silently shedding tears. But even so, what could she do? She could not resist him like this forever, he soothed himself.
She would one day understand and forgive him, just as he understood her.
Then, on a rainy night. He would never forget that night.
He was cold, and only she could warm his empty body. Even if she couldn’t see him, or if she did but saw a room full of air, he still needed her. This villa, this bedroom, only felt like home because of her presence, and not because it was a cold ruin.
He clung to her warm body, feeling a different kind of suppleness and quietness than before. He was full of joy, and he said a lot of things to her, all about their bright future. Then he buried his face in the hollow of her neck, wrapped his arms around her, and fell asleep contentedly.
Somehow he had a nightmare in which a woman held up her bony hand at him. He woke up from the dream, and the person next to him was still sleeping soundly, her face turned in another direction and a smile on her lips.
It was the first time he had seen her sleep so quietly and sweetly. He kissed her dry lips, only to realise that they were as cold as ice.
Something suddenly occurred to him, and he pulled back the quilt…
Blood! The bed was covered in bright red blood!
He panicked, his whole body went numb, and he was at a loss for what to do, like an ignorant child. He didn’t know how she did it. She couldn’t have gotten a razor blade, not even a piece of wood, but her wrists were soaked in crimson liquid, bloody and mangled.
He held her blood-stained body, that naked, lifeless body, raging and snarling like a frightened beast.
She succeeded! She can finally leave him forever, and he will never be able to do anything about it, absolutely nothing!
He thought she was dead, and cried and laughed while hugging her, like a lone wolf who had lost his only companion, howling endlessly into the dark night sky.
He’s gone mad! Only at this moment did he realise that he had lost, completely lost! He has failed the world, won everything, but lost the other world, a world that was born for her!
She had finally gone with him. Even if he died, he had her. He had won! Ling Luochuan had won! But in the blink of an eye, he had easily overturned everything he had.
Luckily, the maid had discovered it early and called an ambulance in time. She had lost a lot of blood, but she was not dead.
In the hospital corridor, he sat there, barefoot, trembling, covered in blood, on a chair. He looked at his hands, his eyes dull and his vision unclear. At that moment, he still wasn’t sure what had happened.
It wasn’t until the doctor and the police came to tell him that she had rubbed her wrists against the crossbar of the vintage bed until her skin was split open. Then, she had bitten her artery with her teeth…
The whole process was almost unimaginably painful and difficult, but she had done it. If it hadn’t been for that dream, she would almost have succeeded.
Hearing the news, he was dumbfounded like an idiot. He couldn’t believe his ears.
Everyone who knew about this incident said, ‘Who would commit suicide like this? Only someone who is mentally unstable would do such a thing. She must be crazy.’
Only he knew that she was not crazy. No one was more calm, objective and well-planned than she was. She had long since seen through what kind of person he was, even if he whispered sweet nothings in her ear, even if he used violence on her frail body. She would leave him no matter what, even if she had to fight against all odds. Staying by his side was worse than death.
He sat by her bedside, looking at her pale, bloodless face. His heart was full of conflicting emotions, surging with grief, bitterness, love and…
He picked up an apple and, while peeling the skin, said to the person who was still unconscious, ‘Everyone says you’re crazy, but I know what you’re thinking. You want to go with him, don’t you? But you can’t find him anymore. The plane he was on was blown into three pieces. There’s not even any remains, it’s all turned to dust. Where would you find him? Even if you did find him, what would you do? You’re my wife, and even in death, your tombstone will bear my surname. So…”
His cold fingers traced the contours of her neck, and he leaned in to whisper in her ear, smiling like the devil. “You’re mine in life, and you’ll be my ghost in death. I won’t let you be together even in death!”
Chapter 61: Trembling
Ruan Shaonan opened his eyes sharply and saw the blinding sunlight. It was dawn.
He looked around in awe, as if he had returned from hell to heaven. This was his study, spacious and bright, without endless darkness, and it wasn’t raining outside the window.
He stood up and stretched his shoulders and neck. A servant knocked on the door outside, ‘Sir, Madam is awake.’
He immediately perked up. He had promised Wei Xi yesterday that he would take her out. She had been looking forward to it for a long time, so no matter how tired he was, he couldn’t go back on his word.
The streets were bustling as usual, and since it was a holiday, there were lots of people. No matter how mediocre and busy life is, on such days, people still wear a happy face.
Wei Xi was excited like a little child, feeling mermaid-like and curious about everything outside. Ruan Shaonan watched her press herself against the window, and whenever she noticed something interesting, she would pull his sleeve, point out the window and yell, ‘Shaonan, look!
All the way down, he found it much more interesting to watch her than the scenery.
They went to the biggest amusement park in the city, rode the antique little train around the park, played on the space shuttle, took the raft ride, went into the haunted house, and watched the 4D movie. All the new, exciting, thrilling, and fun games, Weiwei dragged him through them all.
Ruan Shaonan felt like a father, taking his own immature daughter with him. Seeing her happy, innocent smile, he suddenly felt that all the pain was worth it.
Wasn’t he just asking her to stay by his side? For the rest of their lives, never to be parted.
Even if he had to lie to her for the rest of his life, even if he had to keep this secret and spend the rest of his life living in fear like he was on a high-tension wire, he was willing to go on living like this.
As he thought this, the two of them were sitting in a handmade ice cream shop. Weixi ran up to the counter by herself and bought two extra-large ice creams.
Ruan Shaonan looked at the cup in front of him and pinched her chin, ‘How can I eat all this?’
Wei Xi looked at him with a spoon in her mouth, ‘I didn’t know what flavours you liked, so I got some of everything, and this is what happened.’
Ruan Shaonan laughed and picked up the spoon, eating it in big mouthfuls.
Wei Xi looked at him and whispered, ‘Shaonan, was I mean to you?’
Ruan Shaonan nearly choked and quickly took a sip of juice, asking in return, ‘Why do you ask?’
‘Because every time I’m nice to you, you look so happy and delighted, as if it’s rare. So I thought, I must have been mean to you in the past, otherwise why would you act like this?’
Ruan Shaonan reached out and touched her sunny, bright face, saying with some sadness, ‘You’ve been very good to me, always. It’s me who didn’t appreciate my blessings, and I didn’t know how to cherish you in the past.’
Wei Xi tilted her little head and looked at him, asking in puzzlement, ‘What were we like before?’
Ruan Shaonan froze for a moment, then laughed and said, ‘Didn’t I tell you? Our families have been friends for generations, and we’ve known each other since we were little. Later, your father married you to me. Unfortunately, not long after you married me, you were driving with your parents on a trip and had a car accident. They both died tragically, and you suffered a severe blow to the head, which is why you can’t remember the past.’
‘Don’t I have any other siblings?‘
Ruan Shaonan looked at his ice cream slowly melting in the sun and shook his head, “No, you are an only child.”
Wei Xi nodded, took a sip of juice, and said, “Then it must have been very hard for you to take care of me alone.”
’It wasn’t hard at all. I just hated myself for not being able to take that pain away from you.”
Wei Xi bit her spoon and smiled happily, mumbling, ’Shaonan, you are so good to me.’
Ruan Shaonan smiled and pinched her nose, ‘Silly girl, is that all you’re satisfied with?’
‘If you can be happier in the future, I’ll be even more satisfied.’
Ruan Shaonan suddenly felt a little startled and asked, ‘Where am I unhappy?’
Wei Xi held out her hand and pointed at his well-defined facial features, saying, ‘Here, here, and here, they are all telling me that you are unhappy. Even when you smile, sadness is written on your face…’
Ruan Shaonan grabbed her hand and smiled, ‘You’re just imagining things. Okay, let’s stop talking. Think about what you want for dinner.’
Speaking of which, Wei Xi was happy again, ‘I want to eat…’
An old Chinese song came from outside. Hearing the melody of the prelude, she froze, as if under a spell cast by a magician.
Ruan Shaonan looked at her strangely, ‘What’s wrong?’
She suddenly stood up and ran out without saying a word.
Ruan Shaonan immediately changed his expression and followed her out. Next to them was an audio-visual store, and the song was coming from there.
He saw Wei Xi standing in front of the audio-visual store, standing in the bright sunshine, in the midst of the constant flow of people, listening to the song in a daze, and listening to it with tears in her eyes.
He walked over to her, took her hand and asked, ‘Weixi, what’s wrong?’
She looked up at him through her tears with her clear, bright eyes, pointed to her heart and said chokingly, ‘Shaonan, I…it hurts here, really hurts…what should I do?’
She covered her ears with her hands and knelt down in the endless stream of people on the street. The song continued to play, the sad melody echoing endlessly in the autumn sky.
If this is as far as life goes
and I’m no longer here
I’ll find an angel to love you in my place…
Wei-xi returned to the villa, lost in her thoughts. After dinner, she went upstairs to rest. Unable to rest easy, Ruan Shaonan pushed open the bedroom door and found her sitting alone on the bed, lost in thought.
He came over and touched her forehead. ‘Wei-xi, are you okay?’
She eagerly took his hand. ‘Shaonan, I think I’ve remembered something.’
Ruan Shaonan’s nerves suddenly tensed, like a silk thread about to snap. His face did not change at all, however, and he only asked tenderly, ‘What did you remember?’
“It’s all just fragments, like riding a roller coaster—it’s all flashing by too quickly for me to make out. Shaonan, am I getting better?’
Ruan Shaonan smiled and said as he took out a pillbox from a drawer, ‘Maybe. That’s why you should take your medicine on time so that you can get better faster.’
Weixi nodded heavily and put a handful of pills in her mouth. Ruan Shaonan brought her a glass of water. She swallowed obediently.
‘What about the other compartment?‘ Ruan Shaonan held her back and pointed at the pillbox.
Wei Xi looked at her husband in confusion, “Don’t you only take one compartment at a time?”
’Then do you want to get better faster?‘
’Of course.‘
’Then take the other compartment. The dosage is increased, so the effect will naturally be better, and you will recover faster.‘
’Yes, then I will take the other compartment every day from now on.’
With a warm and charming smile on his face, Ruan Shaonan looked at his young wife and happily swallowed the bitter pills. He knew that he could put his heart back in his stomach as well.
Wei Xi yawned after taking the medicine, and Ruan Shaonan asked, ‘Are you sleepy?’
‘Mmm…’ Wei Xi rested her head on his broad shoulders.
‘Then go to sleep.‘
Wei Xi wrapped her arms around his shoulders and said indistinctly, “But I haven’t watched the TV series yet.”
’I’ll record it for you.”
Wei Xi nodded, “Okay then…”
Ruan Shaonan helped her lie down, and she placed her face in the palm of his hand and said happily, ’Shaonan, when I get better, I’ll be able to remember our happy days together, and I’ll be able to be a good wife, right?’
He patted her hair compassionately, ‘Yes, you can.’
‘I really hope that day comes soon…’ She mumbled this sentence and then fell into a deep sleep.
‘I hope so too…’ He kissed her on the lips and murmured, ‘I hope that day never comes, ever…’
Over the next few days, Wei-xi took more and more medicine, but became less and less lucid. She didn’t want to eat, and every day she shut herself in her bedroom with the curtains closed, sleeping like a log.
The housekeeper noticed something was wrong and said to Ruan Shaonan, ‘Mr Ruan, recently, my lady has been complaining of stomach pains. Do you think we should get a doctor to take a look?’
The person who was sorting through the data paused, looked up and asked, ‘Did she say where it hurts?’
‘She said it hurts under her right rib cage, and I think it might be her liver. This woman is afraid of harming her liver, and this man is afraid of harming his kidneys. If you let it go too long, it could be a fatal illness.”
Ruan Shaonan put the information aside and said, “I know, you can go now.”
The butler withdrew, and Ruan Shaonan locked the information in the drawer. It felt like a heavy dark cloud was weighing on his heart, and he just couldn’t breathe.
He left the study and walked into the bedroom, but there was no one there.
‘Where is Madam?‘
’She’s painting in the greenhouse.”
Perhaps it was nature’s way of dealing with things, but since her recovery, Wei Xi had been like a newborn baby. She had forgotten everything from her past, except for some basic skills, but her interest in painting remained unchanged. However, her technique was still immature, and she could only paint simple sketches. She had forgotten everything else.
So, Ruan Shaonan cleared all the flowers in the glass greenhouse and turned it into a studio for her. It is full of sunlight, like spring all year round. With a CD player playing some light music, it is a great place to sleep and daydream.
So when Ruan Shaonan is not at home, Wei Xi spends most of her time here. She paints, daydreams, and naps on the cushions of the soft couch, just like a cat that feels at home when its owner is away.
Ruan Shaonan walked into the flower room and saw his young wife asleep on the soft couch, covered with a white blanket, wearing white pajamas, and white ear muffs in her ears, looking like a white fox or a cute little white cat.
The drawing paper was scattered all over the floor, some in sheets and some crumpled into balls. After losing her memory, Wei Xi always threw things around like this, like an immature child.
Ruan Shaonan walked over and accidentally saw the painting on the easel, a simple landscape sketch, an empty square, flying white doves, and a man and woman standing on the square, looking at each other across the slanting rays of the setting sun.
The style of painting was simple, but very beautiful and romantic, as if it were a carefully set, elongated movie shot from a high place.
He couldn’t help but smile, thinking that the girl was exceptionally talented and that whatever she painted had a spiritual quality. He also thought back to the way she used to paint without sleep or rest, and couldn’t help but feel a little sad.
He walked over and quietly looked at her face. Every part of this woman was someone he loved and deeply cherished. He was deeply infatuated with her, and the longer it went on, the deeper the infatuation became, the happier he became, and the more fearful the infatuation became, to the point where it was heart-wrenching and he couldn’t extricate himself.
He lifted the blanket and stroked her beautiful body through the thin nightdress. This body had been with him for three years, three whole years, and for him it was not just about sex. It was like a clear pool of water, washing away all his filth and impurity and bringing him the holiness and purity of an angel.
How happy he had been, once upon a time. He had had the woman’s body and soul, without lies, without deceit, without drugs and false memories. He had only had to let go of his obsession, his hatred, and he had had her completely.
She had waited for him for seven long years, seven long years of solitude, and she had been like a devout believer in this desolate world, clinging alone to their initial innocence and faith.
However, all the solid happiness was easily squandered by him. Apart from a heart full of remorse and the fleeting joy of trembling and fear, all the beauty of the past has become a thing of the past.
He should do her justice, shouldn’t he? What he owes her is more than just an ‘I’m sorry’.
Wei Xi rubbed her slightly itchy eyelashes, slowly opened her eyes, looked at her husband with sleepy eyes, and asked doubtfully, ‘Shao Nan, why are you crying?’
Ruan Shao Nan wiped away the tears and smiled, ‘I’m not crying, I just have some sand in my eyes.’
‘Liar! You have tears dripping onto my face, and you say you’re not crying?’
‘That’s your saliva.’
‘Really?’
“Really!’
‘Oh…‘ Wei Xi nodded, “so saliva is salty.”
Ruan Shaonan couldn’t help smiling, and put his arms around her, asking, “Have you been having tummy aches lately?”
’Mmm, over here,’ Wei Xi touched the lower right side of her ribcage, “it hurts when I touch it, and I feel dizzy and nauseous, do you think I’m pregnant?”
Ruan Shaonan’s body stiffened, and he looked down at her, ’How do you know you’re pregnant?’
‘I saw it on TV. When a woman has a baby, doesn’t she feel dizzy, nauseous and have a tummy ache?‘
’We need to find out for sure. Tomorrow I’ll take you to the hospital for a check-up, okay?”
Wei Xi put her arms around his neck and shook her head. “I don’t want to go to the hospital. It’s creepy and scary there.”
Ruan Shaonan coaxed her patiently, ’But if we don’t go to the hospital, how will we know if you’re pregnant? Don’t be afraid, I’ll always be with you.’
‘Okay, I’ll do as you say.‘
Wei Xi pressed her face into her husband’s arms and whispered, “Shao Nan, if I really have a baby, will that make me a better wife?”
Ruan Shao Nan looked at her expectant eyes and said with some sadness, “You are already a good wife.”
’But I always make you unhappy.‘
’I’m not unhappy, I’m just…scared.‘
’What are you afraid of?’
‘A lot, a lot, the biggest fear is that you will leave me.”
Wei Xi looked at him and smiled sweetly, saying very confidently, “I won’t leave you, unless I die…”
He covered her mouth in an instant, nervously saying, “Don’t talk nonsense!”
Wei Xi obediently shut up, suddenly remembering something, taking out a freshly drawn painting from under the couch and pointing to the person on it, saying, ’I drew this today, does this person look familiar to me?’
Ruan Shaonan’s eyes widened in horror, and the tension snapped. The sound of the thread snapping echoed in his head.
He snatched the drawing away from her and, grabbing her shoulders, asked almost menacingly, ‘Where did you see him? Who told you about him?!’
Panicked, Wei Xi looked at him and stuttered, ‘I… no, his face suddenly flashed into my mind today, and I… just drew it. I couldn’t remember who he was, so I wanted to ask you. Why are you so angry?’
The man’s face was full of gloom, and the expression on his face was not anger, but an emotion that was even more terrifying and sinister than anger. Wei Xi hunched her neck and looked at him pitifully, like a little white rabbit that had been pounced on by a lion.
After a long time, he softened his expression and said to her, ‘He’s not a good person. He’s hurt you before. I don’t want you to remember those unhappy things from the past, that’s why I’m so nervous.’
Wei Xi looked at the painting with confusion, ‘How did he hurt me before? Why don’t I have any recollection of it?’
Ruan Shaonan picked her up and walked towards the house, ‘Because you’ve lost your memory, you don’t remember anything that happened in the past.’
Back in the bedroom, Wei Xi still couldn’t let go as she lay on the bed. She looked at the man who was undressing and covering himself with clothes, and asked doubtfully, ‘If he has hurt me before, shouldn’t I hate him very much? Why do I feel a sense of sadness, nostalgia, and a desire to cry when I look at his face? It’s like seeing an old friend after a long time. Isn’t this very strange?’
Ruan Shaonan’s arm rested on the side of her face, kissing her fine lashes, ‘He was your first love, but he cheated on you and broke your heart. So it’s not nostalgia, it’s pain and humiliation.’
She tilted her face up and looked at her husband, ‘Really? Is that really the case?’
‘Really, don’t you believe me?’
‘I believe you, but…’
‘No buts,’ he threatened, biting her chin. ‘If you don’t listen to me, I won’t watch TV with you anymore.’
Wei Xi hurriedly shook her head and hugged the man’s strong back, ‘I’ll be obedient, I won’t ask again.’
Ruan Shaonan nodded, hugged her slightly trembling body, and was just about to get into the mood when Wei Xi poked him in the lower back with her finger, causing a tingling pain.
He grabbed her hand with some annoyance and impatiently asked, ‘What’s wrong now?’
“Shaonan, I haven’t taken my medicine today, I’m afraid I’ll forget in a while.’
He paused for a moment, slowly let go of her hand, and his cold, commanding face was obscured in the shadows of the curtains.
After a while, he said, ‘Then take your medicine.’
Then he watched her take the pillbox from the bedside table, take out the two pills, and swallow them with water. Then he watched her put the pillbox away and turn her face to him, showing a childlike, innocent smile, ‘Okay, I’m done.’
He leaned in close to her and casually turned off the wall light.
The bedroom was pitch black, like the night of the underworld. He heard her breathless gasps of pain in his ear, her silent sobs, and he felt her trembling body from the pain she was enduring.
Her flesh and blood were tightly stretched against her skeleton, her nerves were rendered fragile by his closeness, her lips helplessly opening and closing, her fingernails weak and powerless, and her miserable tears falling into his arms, like the cool autumn rain that penetrates the curtain, dripping with disappointment and sadness.
He knew that he was torturing her in his own way, and she was repaying him in kind. They were both so cruel that they could torture each other to the point of no return.
After an unknown period of time, Ruan Shaonan heard his young wife whisper under him, ‘Shaonan, I’m not crying anymore.’
‘Hmm…’ He touched her face and sure enough, there were no more tears.
She bit her lip and said carefully, ‘Can you please be a little quieter? I’m afraid you’ll hurt the baby.’
Ruan Shaonan looked at her fair face in the darkness. He wanted to say something to her, something he should have said long ago, but he couldn’t find the words.
He kissed her tear-stained eyelashes and sighed, ‘Okay, I’ll be quieter.’
‘Shaonan, do you think our baby will be a boy or a girl?’
‘I like them both.’
‘What should we name our baby?’
‘You decide.’
“Then the boy will be…’
It’s raining…
Ruan Shaonan sat in his study, looking at the sketch that Wei Xi had drawn during the day. The man’s eyes were staring at him, his handsome face, disdainful gaze, and frivolous lips, with an air of disdain.
He took out his lighter and lit the drawing paper, threw it into the ashtray, and watched the man’s face slowly curl up into ashes in the bright firelight, and it scattered when the wind blew in through the window.
He threw the lighter on the table. In the cold room, in the darkness, he could see countless ghosts coming towards him, their faces hideous, their limbs broken, their bodies covered in blood. They had crawled up from the burning inferno to claim his life!
He trembled, covering his face, and looked at the ashes on the floor. He cried out in a low voice, ‘What do you want? Do you think I’m having a good time now? Do you think I’m not suffering? You’re dead, you’re dead! Leave her alone! Haven’t we caused her enough suffering? She’s already miserable…’
He couldn’t hold back his tears at the end, ‘If you really love her, please, let her go, please…’
Chapter 62: A Dream of Southern Branch
Early the next morning, Ruan Shaonan took Weixi to the hospital for a check-up. Weixi had never liked the atmosphere of hospitals, but this time her dislike was tinged with excitement. She tilted her little head, imagining the appearance of her baby, and chattered non-stop the whole way.
Ruan Shaonan drove in silence, listening to her, sometimes responding, but mostly silent, looking worried.
After arriving at the hospital, Dr Wu arranged for Weixi to have a full body check-up.
Weixi asked doubtfully, ‘Isn’t it just an obstetrics and gynaecology check-up to see if I have a baby?’
Dr Wu paused for a moment, glanced at Ruan Shaonan, and then laughed, ‘It’s best to have a full body check-up, it’s more secure.’
Weixi was still not at ease, shaking her head like a rattle, ‘What if I hurt the baby? I’m not going!’
Ruan Shaonan looked down at her and said softly, ‘Don’t worry, these tests are very safe. Just do as the doctor says, and I’ll take you out to play after the tests.’
Wei Xi reluctantly let go of her husband’s hand and followed the nurse.
The two men watched her leave, and Dr Wu looked at the haggard man in front of him with a puzzled expression and asked, ‘Mr Ruan, doesn’t your wife know that she can no longer bear children?’
Ruan Shaonan shook his head, ‘I haven’t told her. She’s always wanted a child, and I’m afraid she can’t take the shock.’
Dr Wu sighed, ‘But hiding it from her like this isn’t a solution. She’ll find out sooner or later.’
“Let’s talk about that later. I’m more worried about her health right now. She’s been complaining about pain under her right ribcage lately, and she says she feels sick and wants to vomit. Could there be a problem?’
Dr Wu thought for a moment, ‘The lower right side of the rib cage is the liver. The antidepressants she is taking contain ingredients that can damage the liver, but it shouldn’t be too serious. We won’t know the details until the test results come back.’
‘When will the test results be ready?’
‘Tomorrow, I’ll call you.’
“Thank you…’
After the check-up, Weixi said she was tired. Ruan Shaonan saw that she didn’t look well, so the two of them went straight home without going anywhere.
After returning home, Weixi took a shower and went to bed early. Ruan Shaonan worked in his study until late at night before returning to his room.
It was a peaceful night, with the sky and mountains clear and bright. The two of them snuggled together like newborn babies, not saying or doing anything. The world was as peaceful and tranquil as a prehistoric paradise.
Ruan Shaonan had a dream, a dream of unparalleled sweetness. He couldn’t remember the details of the dream, only that he and Wei Xi had returned to the distant past, when they were both still teenagers. The sky was as blue as the sea, and he took her to see the maple trees on Nanshan Mountain. The scarlet maple leaves looked like a great burning forest, blending with the colourful clouds in the sky to create a magnificent sight.
Wei Xi was very weak, and every time they climbed to the top of the mountain, he always had to carry her back down. Her small hands wrapped around his neck in trust, her lips whispering little secrets in his ear, and her long hair falling over his shoulders, as beautiful as the moonlight. Below the mountain were vast fields of yellow canola flowers, an endless sea of flowers undulating in the autumn monsoon, as beautiful as a paradise…
He laughed and cried in his dream. That was the most beautiful scenery in his life, forgotten by him in the confines of reality. He wanted to retrieve all this beauty, but it would never be the same again. He had defiled happiness and beauty with endless lust, and they had abandoned her forever. He prostrated himself before fate and begged God for mercy, but God said that the path to heaven had long been closed, and the gates of hell were wide open.
He cried, really cried, crying his heart out in his dreams. He wanted to go back, back to that happy dream, back to those beautiful memories, and become that innocent Ruan Shaonan again. But he could never go back. No one could save him, no one could help him. He had shed too much blood, and he could never wash it off, never…
‘Shaonan, Shaonan…‘
Someone was pushing him, and he suddenly opened his eyes. In the darkness, he saw Wei Xi’s terrified eyes. He touched his face and felt a coldness.
Wei Xi nervously hugged him, “What’s wrong? You were crying and screaming just now, it scared me to death.”
’It’s nothing, I had a nightmare.’
Wei Xi raised her little face and looked at him doubtfully, ‘Shao Nan, are you leaving?’
‘What?’
‘You kept saying just now that I had to go back. Where do you want to go back to?’
Ruan Shao Nan wiped the sweat from his forehead and rubbed her shoulders, saying, ‘I want to take you back to the Lu family mansion to have a look. That’s where we met.’
“Do we still have a mansion?’
‘Of course there is. Your parents left it to me. I’ve already renovated it. It’s at the foot of the maple forest in Nanshan, and there’s a blue lake in front of the house. The garden is quaint and very elegant and beautiful. If you like, we’ll live there in the future. It’s very quiet there, and it’s suitable for you to recuperate.‘
’Maple trees? It must be very beautiful.’ Wei Xi pressed her face against his chest and said happily, ’I’ll definitely like it. In autumn we can go to the mountains together to see the maple leaves, and in summer we can go boating on the lake. I’ll install a swing in the garden, and at night we can sit under it together and look at the stars. During the day I can set up my easel in the garden directly opposite the front door, and while I’m painting I can wait for you to come home.”
With a sweet smile on her lips, she slowly closed her eyes, ’I can let my hair grow long while I wait for our baby to be born. Shaonan, don’t you like it best when I have long hair? You must wait…’
He listened quietly in the darkness, listening to her voice gradually fade away, and the silent tears that had already clouded the corners of her eyes. His fingers gripped her tightly, as if he were clutching his life and fleeting happiness.
The sadness and pain seemed to stretch on indefinitely. As long as he stayed by her side for one more day, it would never end. She would torment him to the point where he could no longer go on living, with her innocent naivety and kind ignorance.
But he couldn’t let go, and he couldn’t let go. He had already come too far, and could no longer distinguish between happiness and pain.
The world is sometimes so ironic and absurd. He had sown the bitter seeds himself, and now he had to taste them alone.
The happiness in front of you can last forever, or it can disappear in an instant. But that’s not the most terrifying thing. The most terrifying thing is that she is life and death to you, and you don’t know when you will lose everything about her.
Second, when he woke up in the morning, Ruan Shaonan noticed that Wei Xi was not feeling well, so he called Wang Dongyang and cancelled all his business appointments. This had happened a few times in the past two years, and Wang Dongyang was used to it. He was also very familiar with cleaning up after his boss.
So when Dr Wu called, Wei Xi was sleeping, and Ruan Shaonan, not wanting to wake her, went to the study alone to answer the phone.
‘Mr. Ruan…’ Dr. Wu sighed, “I hope you can remain calm when you hear this news. I don’t know how to explain it to you, it’s really unbelievable. Judging from the test results, most of Mrs. Ruan’s liver is dead. She should have been in pain for a long time, but why is she only telling you now? I…” He adjusted his glasses, “I don’t know what to say to you. I can only say that I’m really sorry to see such results.”
Dr. Wu finished speaking in one breath, and there was a deathly silence in the air.
‘Mr. Ruan? Are you alright? Mr. Ruan?”
The person on the other end of the line said blankly, “What else can I do now?”
Dr. Wu was silent for a moment, “There’s nothing else you need to do, just stay with her. If you can, I suggest you bring the medicine she’s been taking so I can take a look. Apart from the medicine, I really can’t think of any other possibilities.”
Ruan Shaonan put the phone down, suddenly feeling cold all over, followed by a wave of nausea. He fell out of his chair and knelt on the floor, dry heaving as if he wanted to vomit his innards out.
His vision gradually blurred, and he wiped his eyes with his hands. He tried to stand up, but his legs felt weak as if they were stepping on clouds. Like a drunk, he supported himself with his hands and stood up, fell down, stood up, and fell down again. He repeated this countless times, and finally, he lay on the cold floor and never got up again…
When he opened his eyes again, it was already dusk. He felt cold as a corpse. He got up, walked out of the study, took a shower in the guest bathroom, changed his clothes, and then walked out.
The maid came over to ask him what needed to be prepared for dinner.
He told the maid that nothing needed to be prepared.
He walked into the bedroom and saw that all the curtains were open. The warm sunlight shone in diagonally, like a blooming flower, like young and vibrant life, passionate and unrestrained.
Wu Xi was sitting upright on the bed, holding a drawing pad in his hands and a brush in his right hand. On the bedside table was the white pillbox, already empty.
There were countless sheets of drawing paper scattered on the floor, like Christmas snowflakes. Each one was a sketch of a person, different angles, different expressions, but all of them were the same face, the face that made him tremble with fear.
He suddenly understood everything. No! In fact, he had long since understood, from that terrifying phone call in the morning, or perhaps even earlier than that, but he didn’t want to admit it, didn’t dare admit it, didn’t want to admit it.
Standing in the sunlight at the moment, he felt his hands and feet go cold, like an animal on the verge of death, with all the blood in his body flowing back along the blue veins to protect his vulnerable heart.
He walked over and sat by the bed, looking at the woman who had almost made him destroy everything, the birthplace of all his madness and pain.
‘You’ve recovered your memory a long time ago, haven’t you?”
She put down her drawing pad and turned to look at him. Her pale face showed no trace of panic, like a tranquil lake. Her eyes, however, revealed a strange kind of expectation, as if in the moments before execution, the condemned man felt an inexplicable sense of relief and release.
She said, ‘I never had amnesia.’
He shook his head in disbelief and muttered, ‘How is that possible? I clearly hired…’
She smiled and looked him in the eye, ‘That’s the truth. I lied to you for two whole years. The lie detector expert you hired from the United States couldn’t see through me, thanks to your good teaching. I learned that the most truthful lie must be performed with the most genuine emotions in order to remain invincible forever. The so-called “fake emotions for a real lie” is more or less this principle.’
‘So you’ve been acting to me for the past two years.’ He shook his head and laughed lightly, “You really are a good actress. Your performance was flawless, mixing truth with lies, and I was fooled by you until now.”
He took a deep breath and asked in a trembling voice, “You replaced the pills. You hurt yourself like this to take revenge on me?”
She looked at him calmly and said, ’Do you think there is any other answer?’
‘Was it worth it?’ He touched her calm face with trembling hands. ’If I didn’t love you, if I didn’t care about you at all, even if you died, I wouldn’t shed a tear for you. You sacrificed your life, but I’m unscathed. Does such revenge even make sense?’
She still looked at him quietly, and weakly smiled, ‘It doesn’t matter anymore, I can’t go on. For the past two years, every night I have to lie in your bed like a dutiful wife, be held in your arms, smile at you, accept your favours, and then every day relive in my heart what you did to me, all of this has made me so miserable that I can’t wait to die. I can no longer tell whether I’m torturing you or myself. I can’t go on living like this anymore, it’s time to end it.’
She looked down at her drawing board, gently stroked the beautiful eyes of the person in the picture, and smiled peacefully, ‘Now, I just want to be with him.’
He could no longer control himself, and his hands tightened around her like iron pincers. He shouted hoarsely, ‘Why can’t you just forget about my damn mistakes? Why can’t you give me another chance? You should know what you mean to me, you should know how much I love you, why do you have to ruin it all before you’re happy? Why?!’
He grabbed her arm and looked at her sadly. ‘He’s dead, he’s been dead for three years. He’s not coming back, you should wake up from your dream. Haven’t I worked hard enough these days? Haven’t I been good enough to you? Why can’t you just forget about him? What do you want? For me to die in front of you? Will you feel better if I die? Is that it? Tell me!’
He grabbed her hair and pulled her down on the bed, as fiercely as if he were dealing with his worst enemy. Their gazes met in the air, overflowing with the fire of weapons clashing.
‘What do I want? Perhaps I should be the one to ask you that.’ She looked at him through the golden sunset, her clear eyes glowing like water. ‘Mr. Ruan, it’s not that I’ve never loved you. You know better than anyone else what kind of heart I had when I first loved you so humbly. Even though I knew you were tormenting me with your drunkenness, and even though you did such terrible things to me, I never once thought of leaving you…’
She paused for a moment and laughed self-deprecatingly, ‘You easily squandered all my feelings, and you threw me at Lu Renxi, using his hands to put me to death. You threw it away so easily, like an useless paper cup or an old garment that gets in the way. How could you still ask me to stand before you as if nothing had happened, pouring out my loyalty and love to you? I can’t do it, and no one else can either.’
He looked at her dispiritedly, slowly releasing the arm that had been holding her tightly. He was speechless in the face of the stark reality and bloody past.
“I escaped death at the hands of that beast, and you let me fend for myself. I worked hard to live, to finish school, and to become myself again. Then Ling Luochuan came along. He was different from you, and I fell for him. I never wanted to take revenge on you, I just wanted to be with him. But even that you wouldn’t allow. I know you better than Luochuan, and I know that he is no match for you. He is not as cold-blooded as you, not as ruthless. I don’t want a man who truly loves me to suffer because of me. So I gave up, I gave up on a man who would rather hurt himself than hurt me, and I broke his heart. But even so, you still wouldn’t let me go.’
She slipped out of his grip, leaned against the bed and sat back down, hugging her sketchpad as if the people in the drawings could give her courage and strength.
“I’ve always remembered that day when I rolled downstairs and my head was bleeding, and you threw me onto your bed without even looking.’
She looked around and laughed mockingly, ‘Yes, this is the room, this is the bed. I woke up in pain on it, unable to move, my hands and feet had no strength, but my consciousness was becoming clearer and clearer. I looked at the dark camera with tears in my eyes. You were on top of me, violating me again and again, endlessly. Do you know how I felt? I wanted to die from the pain! I really wanted to die, but I couldn’t. You can make someone suffer so much that they would rather be dead than alive, but you don’t even give them the right to end it themselves. Is this how you love someone?‘
She said this numbly, her eyes looking straight ahead, her soul not there, as if she had already broken free from her body and drifted to another time to experience that cruel atrocity all over again for herself.
’After that, I couldn’t speak or see, I shut myself away. I didn’t have the courage to face anyone, especially Rakuten. Because I was afraid of you, I was so afraid that you would hurt him. Listening to his desolate voice, listening to him berate himself like that, I felt him slowly wasting away next to me. I didn’t even dare to cry, and could only put on a numb face every day, ignoring, not asking or listening. But even so, you didn’t let me go…’
She looked him in the eye and smiled sadly, ‘Ruan Shaonan is Ruan Shaonan, and driving people to the brink of extinction is your forte. Even if it means sacrificing so many innocent lives, you won’t bat an eyelid to achieve your goal. How could you do it to an entire plane with 103 lives on board?’
He looked at her silently, his sharp eyes now as still as death. His Adam’s apple moved up and down as he said after a long pause, ‘How do you know I did it?’
‘You may have forgotten, but when I attempted suicide for the last time, you said to me, ‘The plane he was on was blown into three pieces. The cause of that crash was never found, but you didn’t even think twice before saying it was bombed. Mr. Ruan, do you want me to continue?’
‘No need,’ he said, looking at his hands on his knees. He asked again, ‘Is that when you decided to stay by my side and carry out your revenge?’
‘The man I loved is dead, and I am forced to stay with a man I do not love and submit to his pleasures night after night. This torment is more than I can bear for even one more day. I am utterly despondent, in such pain that I wish to die. But you would not let me die. No matter what method I used, you always managed to drag me back and make me suffer more than death. Until one day, you told me that you wanted to prevent us from being together even in death. I finally understood: Why should I die? It’s you who deserves to die, you’re the one who started all this tragedy. Before he left, Luo Chuan once told me that he suspected you of using Yi Tian to launder money for the Southeast Asian mafia. He wanted to take the opportunity of returning to Beijing to ask his brother to help investigate you. Unfortunately, he will never be able to return home. After that, I decided to stay by your side.’
She turned her face and looked at the man in front of her, who seemed to have lost the whole world. ‘Unfortunately, you are too cautious. I searched for a whole year and found nothing. I once broke the password to your computer and peeked at the documents you locked in the drawer, but I still found nothing. In the end, I gave up. I knew that I had to find another way to take revenge. My father once said that the best way to get revenge on someone is not to kill them, but to destroy the thing they value most, which will make them feel like they are living hell. Apart from power and status, money and revenge, what is the most important thing to you? Apart from myself, I can’t think of any other answer. You have spent so much time, money, manpower, resources, and used so many means, sacrificing the lives of so many people, just to get me—a woman who no longer belongs to you. In that case, I might as well let you get nothing.
He looked at her with reddened eyes and shook his head sadly, ‘It’s not that I’m being cautious, but after you got better, I didn’t want to have anything to do with them anymore, and I just wanted to spend time with you, so… I’ve been doing legitimate business for the past two years.’
She looked at him and shook her head and laughed lightly, ‘I see, I almost forgot, you’re also good at crossing the bridge and demolishing the bridge.’
Unconsciously, it had already gotten dark, and the bedroom was a murky darkness, as if drawing a grey full stop for a once beautiful life. The birth of a life, no matter how brilliant or pale, no matter how noble or lowly, when it comes to an end, it is all the same sad and helpless.
‘In fact, you don’t have to do this, really, you don’t have to…’ The person who hadn’t spoken for a long time finally spoke, but every note that came out contained sadness. ‘If you just say that you don’t want to see me again, just say it, and I will…’
‘Will you let me go?’ she interrupted him. ’You won’t. From beginning to end, you have no idea how to love, and perhaps you don’t know how to love yourself either. For two years, I tried to see the world from your perspective and think like you. I thought I could enjoy the thrill of revenge like you, but in the end, I was barking up the wrong tree. I’ve suffered so much, and I’m not happy at all. The suffering we have endured cannot be used as a reason to hurt others. We should have understood this a long time ago, shouldn’t we?’
‘Yes…‘ he nodded softly.
’Unfortunately, we have already gone too far.’ She extended her withered fingers and gently stroked his ashen face. ’You just said that you don’t care about me at all, and that you won’t shed a tear if I die. I hope that’s true. If so, my revenge won’t be considered successful, and I can go with a clear conscience. Only when you are innocent when you are alive can you have peace after death. It was already hard enough when I was alive, and I don’t want to die without peace.’
He looked at her pale but peaceful face, watching her calmly embrace her impending death. He didn’t know what to say or what else to do. Everything in front of him had already slipped out of his control. She was right in front of him, but she had become a nightmare that he could never control.
He took her hand and held it up to her chin with his other hand. ‘You’re right, you’re still my wife, and I won’t let you leave me. I’ve said that even if you die, your tombstone will still bear my surname. So don’t you dare try to avoid me at the end, hugging his portrait and sneaking off to die somewhere alone. I won’t allow it.”
She slowly pulled her hand out of his hand, put the sketchpad aside, and lay down slowly, saying with some weariness, ’If that’s what you want, then so be it. I’m tired, I can’t hold on any longer. In fact, I should have died a long time ago…’
Her eyes looked at the ceiling in a daze, tears blurring her vision. ‘I should have died when Lu Renxi threw me in that abandoned glass factory. But I refused to accept my fate. He cut my throat with broken glass, not completely severing the artery in my neck. He didn’t want me to die too quickly and too comfortably, but I climbed out on my own.’
“Because that’s you, you’ve never accepted your fate.’
She slowly closed her eyes and whispered, ‘Forty minutes…’
‘What?’
‘It took exactly forty minutes from the time he hung up the phone to the time he heard the siren. But for me, it felt like four days, four months… no, it should be four centuries. He used pliers to pull out my fingernails one by one…’
He covered her mouth, and tears fell on her face as he choked out, ‘Don’t say anymore, he’s already dead.’
Wei Xi pulled away from his cold hand, shook her head, her eyes blurred with tears, and said in a daze, ‘He’s dead? He’s not. He lives in my heart. Every time I think about what he did to me, I tremble with fear. The pain and humiliation he inflicted on me will never leave my mind until the day I die. Whenever I’m at rest, whenever my mind stops working, that deep-rooted fear will creep into my mind and leave me no peace. Fortunately, it’s all over now. I can finally be relieved…”
His kiss landed on her dry lips. She opened her eyes and looked at his tearful eyes, and said to him, “The child you aborted three years ago was yours. Luo Chuan and I didn’t have sex completely. This is the second child between you and me. The first one was killed by Lu Renxi, and it turned into a pool of blood and died in my belly.”
He suddenly closed his eyes, and the sky and earth darkened…
A few minutes later, he opened his eyes again and saw her quiet eyes. He kissed her forehead and said hoarsely, ‘I know. Sleep well. When you wake up, it will all be over.’
Chapter 63 No More You
Ruan Shaonan walked into his study and locked the door. Then he sat in a chair and looked at the empty pillbox in his hands. He had a chance to call it off. But he didn’t. Selfishly thinking that if she forgot everything, they would have a chance to start over, he forgot that ‘there is a God in the sky’. The heavens had laid a net for him, and there was nowhere for him to escape.
She died after all because of these pills, and he watched as she reset her life, but felt nothing.
It was heart-wrenching! He didn’t want to think about it anymore, so he pulled open the drawer and took out a shiny pistol. He looked at the murder weapon and gave a quiet smile like Nixi’s. His soul flew out of his body and returned to the distant past, shrouded in a warm golden veil.
The sky was clear, the maple trees on Nanshan Mountain, and the refreshing autumn wind blew quietly through the courtyard in the gathering dusk. He was wearing a white shirt and looked at her from afar as the slanting autumn sun set in the west. He watched her grow smaller and smaller, until she was just fourteen years old again, just as she had been when they first met.
She was wearing a white cotton dress, her long black hair streaming down like moonlight, and she was holding a wounded puppy in her arms. She looked at him with tears in her eyes and said, ‘Hachi is dying. Can you help me save him?’
He leaned down and looked into her crystal-clear eyes. In the blink of an eye, he was doomed to a lifetime of indulgence.
He picked up his pistol and pointed it at his temple, tilting his face up to look at the dark ceiling. The world before death was so quiet, and the sadness in his heart gradually subsided, like the surging tides, rising and falling with the light of the sun, the moon and the stars, and finally returning to peace.
The darkness around him gradually dispersed, and he closed his eyes, hearing the passing of the years, and the fleeting passage of time. He saw the beautiful face of his 14-year-old wife, Wei Xi, who was holding Hachi and waving at him gently with a sweet smile. Then she turned around and disappeared into a golden haze.
In the last moment, he was still wondering if they would have a different ending if they started from scratch.
The answer was no, they wouldn’t. Because he was Ruan Shaonan, it was in his nature, he had no choice, just as he could never give up his obsession with her, it was his instinct, his destiny.
A tear silently slipped down in the darkness. He said, ‘I can’t let you leave me, so I can only relieve your pain in this way, and relieve my own pain. So, Weixi, take me away…’
The piercing sound of gunfire ripped through the silent night, like a punch to people’s frightened and confused hearts. It drifted under the neon lights of the bustling city, piercing the long, hazy night.
Wei Xi opened her eyes in the darkness and heard the maid’s terrified screams, the sound of shuffling footsteps, the butler’s frantic banging on the door, the urgent siren… All these sounds came to her ears in quick succession, like the tide of the dark night surging towards her, before slowly receding.
She touched the drawing board beside her, and cold tears ran down her face, landing on the face of the beautiful statue-like figure in the painting, and on his beautiful tattooed body.
Zhao Ying, the most beautiful and enchanting dahlia, symbolises eternal happiness and hope, but also carries a fatal allure.
Once you set foot in it, there is no return. Heaven and hell are so close together that it is hard to distinguish the boundaries, like the feeling of revenge, painful yet sweet.
The journey has been desolate, and when you reach the end, you have lost yourself.
After Ruan Shaonan died, Weixi buried him in the cemetery on Nanshan. The grave was surrounded by tall maple trees, with lush branches and leaves and an evergreen canopy. However, when autumn came, the forest was full of colour, and the maple leaves were like fire, as if in a golden dream, warm and gentle.
She knew he would have liked it.
A grand funeral was held for him, with speeches delivered by the prominent families in the church, the choir singing a solemn requiem for him, and the priest praying sincerely for his soul to ascend to heaven and rest in peace.
People gathered in front of his grave with flowers, sprinkling the petals down with the soil, silently weeping and sobbing. But people do not understand why his widow, his only relative in this world, is behaving so quietly and calmly.
Because they do not know how many stories, tragedies and heartbreaking secrets lie behind this tragedy.
They do not know that behind this tragic death is a legendary love story…
Only she knows all the secrets, and only she knows that the deepest sorrow is not on the face, not in the meaningless tears of the onlookers, but in the heart.
Wei Xi inherited all of Ruan Shaonan’s estate, including the Lu family’s property that he had cheated from her. Accompanied by Wang Dongyang, she sat in the lawyer’s office, listening as Ruan Shaonan’s lawyer explained his assets to her one by one.
He listened to the shocking series of numbers in a daze, without the slightest ripple in his heart.
Everyone comes into this world with empty hands and leaves with nothing. But that doesn’t mean the dead won’t leave the living with pain and regret, as well as an unpayable blood debt.
When they left the lawyer’s office, Wang Dongyang told Wei Xi that if it weren’t for the fact that Chi Mo and he hadn’t died, Chi Mo would have been seriously injured in the head while protecting her. Ruan Shaonan had hidden them in a nursing home and kept them under house arrest.
Wei Xi, however, told him that she had known about this for a long time. She had been married to Ruan Shaonan for three years, and it was difficult for them to keep secrets from each other.
Wang Dongyang was surprised at the calmness and unruffled composure of the woman in front of him. He suddenly realised that perhaps everything had always been in her control, including when her dead boss would die and in what way he would die.
And what happened next moved the entire city.
Ruan Shaonan’s widow donated most of his estate in his name to the families of the victims of the plane crash three years ago. She sold Yi Tian’s shares to Gu Yongling of the Fu Huang Group for a nominal price.
This poor woman is still regretting her betrayal, but she doesn’t know that the real murderer who disfigured and disabled her is her so-called fiance.
The rest of the estate was donated to the World Children’s Foundation.
Only the old Lu family mansion, which Wuxi left to Chi Mo and Ru Fei, was originally her mother’s property.
When everything had settled down, she picked a sunny, cloudless day to pay her respects to her late husband, the man she had once loved like her life, and the bloodthirsty enemy.
She sat on the grass, leaning against his tombstone, just like when she was a child, sitting on the swing and snuggling in his arms.
She looked up at the clear blue sky and said to him, ‘I have donated all your assets to those you have hurt, hoping that this will bring you peace in the afterlife. You once said that you would not allow me to hold his portrait and die in secret somewhere without anyone knowing. But at this moment, this is what I want to do most. I loved him as I loved you when we were young. But I never even said “I love you” to him. Can you understand this heart-rending regret?’
She turned her face away, wiped the photo on the tombstone with her sleeve, and whispered, ‘Shaonan, farewell. If there is a next life, I will beg God to let me become a small fish and chase and play with him in a narrow fish tank. If there is a next life, I would rather suffer from war, hunger, poverty, floods and diseases, but I hope that in my life, there will be no more of you…’
Chapter 64: As the rain falls on the river, the white dew has not yet dried
If I hadn’t received the notification of Weixi’s death, it would have been the second spring. In the fifth month of late spring, when the flowers were in bloom, she found her remains and the things she had used during her lifetime in a remote but scenic town in the south.
There was a simple suitcase, paints, and a drawing board, as well as an oil painting called ‘Morning Shadows’. Ling Luochuan’s appearance was lifelike on the painting, like a dark hero who led people out of tragedy. This was Weixi’s last work before she died.
If I weren’t sitting in the cold, damp room where Wei Xi lived before she died, looking at the things she used and the simple furnishings, I would burst into tears.
She always thought she was alive, but she had no idea what world she was living in. At this moment, she knows she is dead, but she doesn’t know if she was happy before she died.
Ling Luochuan left with regrets. He never knew if Weixi had forgiven her or if she really loved him. Looking at this painting now, if he had known, he would have known that Weixi loved him very deeply.
Unfortunately, he will never know.
If Fei had not returned to the city where they had tried so hard to live together, with Weixi’s ashes and her belongings, a city that held all their memories, their joys, their sorrows and their pain.
In accordance with Weixi’s last wish, Fei did not bury her in the ground, but on a sunny morning with the dew still falling, stood at the top of a mountain and scattered her ashes and the painting ‘Morning Shadows’ into the wind.
In life they did not share the same quilt, but in death they shared the same grave. This was Weixi’s last wish as she lingered on in the world, and it was fulfilled by someone who was like a sister to her, to comfort her for her life full of suffering.
At this moment, Ruofei, who was heartbroken, still did not understand. Everyone said that God would care for those souls that worked hard and strived to improve themselves, but why did he have to give Weixi, who had always worked hard to live her life, such an ending?
As she watched Wei Xi’s white ashes slowly scatter in the wind, she finally understood. Perhaps this ending was exactly what Wei Xi had hoped for: to be with the one she loved, for a lifetime, until death do them part.
Ten years later, Ru Fei and Chi Mo opened a small flower shop and became the most ordinary couple in the world. Their days were simple, but peaceful. Like all couples in the world, they argued over trivial matters and bickered over trifles, but never once considered separating.
Every year at Ching Ming, they would go to the cemetery on Nanshan Mountain to pay their respects to a deceased friend, even though he had once tried to put them to death.
Ten years later, when they looked back at what had happened, they realised that all the twists and turns, the earth-shattering events, were just a faded memory.
Humans are such fickle and forgetful creatures.
No one in this city remembers Ruan Shaonan, Ling Luochuan, or Lu Weixi. These once-glorious names have been buried in the quicksand of time by fleeting moments, becoming an eternal, unknown secret, a legend that breaks everyone’s heart who hears it.
However, every year in late spring and May, Ruo Fei would bring her and Weixi’s favourite chestnut cake, step on the soft grass of late spring, and come to the place where the three of them had lived together to mourn the beautiful but sad soul and to search for those beautiful but difficult memories.
This year is no different…
After closing the flower shop, Ruifeng went to the building that had been converted into a youth apartment complex, carrying the chestnut cake that she had bought earlier. She planned to sit alone in the garden opposite, remembering the deceased and the past.
However, as she slowly approached with the cake, she saw a figure that should never have appeared at this time and in this place.
The cake in her hand fell to the ground, and she rubbed her eyes until they ached, unable to believe what she was seeing.
She walked over to the person in the wheelchair, grabbed his hand excitedly, and said, ‘Ling Luochuan, you’re not dead?’
The man, however, looked at her blankly, his beautiful eyes and long eyelashes betraying a childlike innocence and confusion.
She looked startled, shook his hand firmly, and said in surprise, ‘Don’t you recognize me?’
“I’m sorry, miss, I’m his sister. May I ask who you are?’
If she hadn’t looked up and stared in a daze at the beautiful woman in front of her holding a cup of hot coffee and smiling gracefully, she would have stuttered, ‘I… I’m a friend of his. Didn’t he die in a plane crash? How did he become like this?’
The beautiful woman looked at her brother with some sadness. ‘Back then, after the plane crash, our family all thought he was dead. Unexpectedly, he was found during the last search and rescue operation. We didn’t let the media report the news for his safety. He was the sole survivor of the plane crash, but unfortunately, he suffered a severe blow to the head during the crash and never woke up. The doctors said there was no hope, until six months ago, when he miraculously woke up. But after waking up, he changed completely. The doctors said the impact damaged the brain cells, and now he is like a little child.”
If she hadn’t looked at the man in front of her with despair, strange feelings would have welled up in her heart, making it impossible for her to reconcile him with the Ling Luochuan she remembered.
‘Does he still have a chance to recover?”
Mei Ren shook her head, put the coffee in Ling Luochuan’s hands, and tidied his hair on his forehead a little. ’He’ll never recover. But for some reason, ever since he woke up, he’s been asking to come here. I think he might be here waiting for a very important woman, and he’s been waiting for six months. Miss, do you know who my brother is waiting for? If you do, can you please let her know to come and see him, so that my poor brother doesn’t have to wait any longer?’
If she didn’t look up and see the city sky, it looked like a white abyss. White birds flew by, and the sky was clear.
She held back the tears in her eyes, leaned down, looked into his clear, watery eyes, and choked as she said, ‘Rakawa, you don’t have to wait anymore, she’s…’
Before she could finish her sentence, his lips trembled and his eyes revealed a deep fear. It was as if he was begging her, begging her not to say any more, begging her not to extinguish the last glimmer of hope in his heart, the last glimmer of light.
She slammed her eyes shut and, in the end, did not say any more. When she opened her eyes again, there were tears in her eyes, and she smiled and said to him, ‘Okay, if you want to wait, then wait…’
She straightened up, left the brother and sister behind, and walked away without saying a word.
She crossed the street and walked through the crowd. The tears of panic blurred her vision, and everything in front of her seemed to be through a layer of frosted glass. She didn’t know where she was going.
She didn’t know how long the man would wait, a year, ten years, twenty years, or a lifetime… She didn’t want to think about it anymore.
The tragic sadness ripped her chest open, her blood was flowing, and she couldn’t breathe.
She stood at the crossroads of the city, hearing the wind gently sweeping past the city’s corners, the flowers blooming silently, the sun rising and setting, the grass growing and withering, the spring deep like the sea, the begonias piling up…
Ten years have passed, and the person who once treasured their life has gone alone, leaving them to re-discover life as orphans.
She gently closes her eyes and hears a voice, as if floating in the sky, overlooking the earth. That voice, like a miracle, keeps saying, ‘Rain falls to the river below, and the white dew has not dried…’
The rain falls to the river below, the white dew has not yet dried…
The rain falls to the river below, the white dew has not yet dried…
The listener’s tears fall like rain, and they whisper to the sky without a sound:
Remember, survival itself is a victory. I’ll be waiting for you here…